9 Reasons Why Kids Are Total Dicks (And Why We Should All Thank Our Parents) – Scary Mommy

9 Reasons Why Kids Are Total Dicks (And Why We Should All Thank Our Parents)

Buzzfeed hilariously reminds us how annoying kids are. It may make you reconsider having more children — and call your mom to say “thanks.”

We’ve all had that moment of clarity when we realize we put our parents through all the shit our kids are putting us through, right? It usually happens around the toddler years. One day we just think, “Oh my god. Did I drive my parents this crazy?”

“Babies may seem cute, but they’re actually the worst. They shit in little pouches, they cry constantly, they can’t even walk or talk for a whole f**king year. It’s like playing the most boring game of charades, except you’re never gonna win.

Think you can be a parent? One baby can burn through 5,000 diapers in three years. Guess who gets to clean that up? That’s $1200 and 166 hours spent on baby poo.”

Well, when you put it that way…

“You like sleep? Then don’t have a fucking kid. First two years parents can expect to lose 730 hours of sleep.” 

That actually explains a lot.

“Everyone thinks kids are awesome, but parents know the truth.” 

Yup. They’re expensive. They’re exhausting. The things we have to do for them are pretty damn disgusting, truth be told. The video makes us all seem bat-shit insane for signing up for this. And we are.

But it’s totally worth it.