I wish someone had told me to:
1. Enjoy sleep. Nap. It’s a luxury that becomes a necessity you never seem to have enough of. Buy nice sheets. Roll around in them. Spend a whole day in bed. The next time you do it, you’ll be comforting a feverish, puking child and that’s not nearly as enjoyable.
2. Appreciate your body now. As flawed as it may be, after children it will be worse. Droopier, stretched out and mushy. Even your feet will be bigger. Get a pedicure and flaunt them.
3. Drive a fun car. A convertible or a Beetle. Blast music that you love. Soon you’ll be driving a minivan and singling along to The Laurie Berkner Band. Even when you’re alone in the car.
4. Travel with your spouse. Family vacations are wonderful, but not the same. And finding someone to watch three kids under five? Impossible.
5. Eat out at really nice places. Indulge in a five course meal. Chew your food. Savor it. Soon you’ll be dining at chain restaurants scarfing down left over grilled cheese. If you’re lucky enough to get to a nice restaurant once you have kids, you’ll be paying the equivalent of an extra meal in babysitting fees. Linger.
6. Do things spur of the moment. Jet off somewhere at the last minute, with nothing but the clothes on your back. Have an impromptu adventure. Once you have kids you’ll need to plan everything.
7. Call in sick to work and use the day for yourself. Moms never get the day off, and you’ll make up for that sick day ten fold by caring for sick children when you are indeed yourself, sick.
8. Spend money on yourself. Invest in some really great forever items, because once you have kids the trade off will not seem worth it. You’ll calculate the number of diapers you could buy for the cost of those designer sunglasses. Buy them now and wear them later.
9. Pee with the door shut. It will be years before you get to do that again.
10. Under-appreciate your parents. Roll your eyes at them. Question their actions and judgment. Tell them they don’t know everything. Once you have kids you’ll have a new-found appreciation for them, and discover that they know a lot more than you gave them credit for. Ignorance is bliss.
What do you wish you’d been told?
{ 79 comments… read them below or add one }
Spot on!
I was just saying the other morning that I never truly appreciated my “pick and go” ability. Now, there are bags and more bags and those bags are filled with every possible thing to hoard off tantrums, feed the hungry, thirst the thirsty and cure the boredom that has come with me thinking that taking children shopping with me was a good idea. It NEVER is.
Futureblackmail’s last blog post..THE CALM BEFORE THE STORM
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That list is so sad and so true!! The bad part is if someone would have given that to me before… I don’t know that I would’ve believed all of it. Now it’s all completely normal!
Tabitha Blue’s last blog post..Wordless Wednesday… almost
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Amen, Scary. Thanks for the reminders (too late for me, alas!).
I had so much fun enjoying your advice and creating my own that I’ve piggybacked on my own blog. Hope you enjoy!
Grendelskin’s last blog post.."Before I Was a Mom" list
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That was great.
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This is the same reason why I am trying to enjoy myself. I know that I would missed all this things the moment I am married.
Paul U’s last blog post..How to create your own RSS subscriber reminder
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Love your list. It is very accurate!
I just learned of Maddie this morning. I will certainly keep her family in my prayers.
debbie’s last blog post..What do you do while you drive?
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I was so sad to hear about Maddie this morning. My hear is breaking and I will keep her family in my prayers.
As for the list? Fabulous. And so bittersweet.
KathyB!’s last blog post..What do YOU have to say
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I have done a pretty good job of appreaciating all of those luxuries in my pre-kids life. Except maybe the sleep one. I never slept in since I had so many important things to do on weekend mornings (??)
Great list.
And such terrible news about little Maddie. I only knew her parents through their writing – but her little face is etched in my heart today.
Kate Coveny Hood’s last blog post..I Love it When Plan Comes Together (Alternately Titled: The Babysitter Who Jumped Out the Window)
Twitter: BigPieceofCake
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I wish someone had told me that I would have no time, really truly no time, to get things done. That I would feel strapped for that precious commodity every minute of my life after kids.
I would have sat and done nothing AND not complained that I was “bored”
iMommy’s last blog post..Guest Post: 10 Things "They" Don’t Tell you about Parenting
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All very true–but it’s far too late for me! I will also add–see lots of “R” rated movies!
I’m so sad about Maddie–I feel like I’m walking around in a fog.
Jennifer’s last blog post..These Are My Little Friends…
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Ha! Pee with the door closed. Ain’t that the truth? Sometimes when my husband is home I sneak in the bathroom and close the door JUST BECAUSE I CAN.
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#9 and #10 are my favorites! I feel like I never get to pee alone – my little helper always wants to flush or unrolled the paper.
And we took seven years to do all the things you mentioned before starting our family. It was well worth it and we enjoyed each other’s company very much but we cannot believe how much we’ve enjoyed our little one – he is so much more fun! Well worth the price of peeing with an audience!
T Rex Mom’s last blog post..New Soccer Ball!!!
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I’m not a parent, I don’t know if I ever will be, but the fact about buying good quality sheets? Oh hell yes. What a flipping difference it is having good sheets.
dawn’s last blog post..raspberry & lemon scones
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OH MY GOODNESS…why doesn’t someone tell you these things before you bring life into the world. Somedays I wonder if I will EVER pee alone again:) This list is SOOOO dead on…especially the part about appreciating your pre baby body…what i would do to have back those hips:) i’m lovin’ your blog…i’ll be back again and again!
LeAnne’s last blog post..Sassy lil’ chef
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Oh, what a great post, I think it is just perfect and bang on. I agree, totally. Peeing with the door shut! Now that’s something I have not done since before my 2 boys were born! ;)
Great blog! I love finding new amazing mom blogs. :) I will be back for sure!
Loukia’s last blog post..A Brand New Loulou!
Twitter: MrsLoulou
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So true!
Don’t forget the lovely “Having sex whenever/wherever you want” option! And I second the “Being able to get up and go in a few moments”.
Also, being able to wear a regular bra and not having to use nipple pads.
Mrs Soup’s last blog post..Wordless Wednesday – Geeky Baby
Twitter: mrssoup
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All so very true. But don’t worry if you didn’t do it before you had kids. You’ll get the chance for all of it after they grow up and leave…well all but the “nice body” part hehehe
nikkicrumpet’s last blog post..~AND THE WINNERS ARE……….
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You’re so right….Wish I’d known. But it seems to get better, the older they get, you just have new worries.
amy’s last blog post..Conversation with a 9 year old
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I just want to say that not all of us give in and drive minivans!
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Awesome advice! Great post.
Robin’s last blog post..Wordful Wednesday
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Great post. We linked you up on our shared blog. I love these kinds of topics.
But I couldn’t visit the link. Sorry. I just can’t do sad today.
Jennifer’s last blog post..Before we were moms
Twitter: jwilliams057
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I have a reverse list for you…now that my kids are all growing beards and alomost out of High School…
1. Kiss them, alot…soon the will cringe when you do.
2. Hold hands all the time, soon they will shove their hands in their pockets to avaid this.
3. Be happy when they crawl in your bed at the break of dawn, one day they will just stop comming
4. Let them in bed when they have a nightmare, soon they will be texting some girl about thier bad dream, not seeking your comfort
5. Enjoy it, soon you will have to dot on a dog that you pretend is a baby called Lulu, becasue NO ONE else is ever home, and then everyone just knows you’ve lost your mind…..
Former Fat Chick’s last blog post..150- Celebration = Q & A- Fat Chick Style
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Kiss the color white goodbye for at least 15 years.
zelzee’s last blog post..The Apple Can Fall Far From The Tree
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Great list. I agree with every single one. People told me all kinds of stuff before I was a mom but you know what? I never listened. I don’t think I was capable of listening. You know?
Lee of MWOB’s last blog post..Living by example
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I think I did hear these things before, but, one can not fully appreciate anything until it happens to them.
I think I would say – Don’t say …”I would never……” concerning other parents —–> because you just don’t get it yet!
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I whole heartedly agree with EVERY ONE of these!
can ya tell I mean it?? really mean it?
Here’s another one:
Ask for forgiveness not permission.
swirl girl’s last blog post..An Open Letter (s)
Twitter: swirlgirlspearl
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This is why I don’t have kids. yet. I enjoy being a DINK. (double income no kids)
So sad to hear about this precious child. No words can express.
Melissa’s last blog post..This is as random as it gets.
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This is why I don’t have kids. yet. I enjoy being a DINK. (double income no kids)
So sad to hear about this precious child. No words can express.
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How come they don’t put that stuff in the mommyhood books?
Jen, buried with children’s last blog post..Where’s Your Nose?
Twitter: buriedwithkids
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Love the list!! And completely agree. Probably wouldn’t have made a difference though…. all that becomes more special when you can’t have it. :) and has a LOT more meaning too.
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“2. Appreciate your body now” SO true! i was just looking through old scrapbooks today and saw a picture of me a few years ago when i thought i was fat… honey i would pay a million bucks to have that body i didn’t want back again :-) GREAT list by the way. loved it!
Lizzie’s last blog post..American Idol… Top 8
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I SOOO agree with this list!
If I could go back, I would just sit and enjoy a clean house that was clean all. day. long.
Oh, and getting to shampoo, condition, shave my legs AND armpits, all in one shower!
Caitlin’s last blog post..This Little Piggy Take 2
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I agree!
I miss peeing alone.
Amber’s last blog post..The New Car
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I hated my body before I was pregnant, talk about distorted body image. Now, I look at pictures and go “Damn”. What was I thinking? *sigh*
Queen Lindsay’s last blog post..Men’s Top Ten Turn-Offs
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that you ACTUALLY would be so frustrated from time to time that you might feel like throwing yourself or your child out the window, and that you would still be a good person and wonderful mother, because everyone has bad days and everyone gets frustrated from time to time.
scrappysue’s last blog post..wordful wednesday – girls live here
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To be honest (and a little embarassed) I proooobably would have liked Laurie Berkner before I had a kid. That lady can rock the buzz buzz.
These are so true, though… waller in the nice sheets and jet off to someplace where kids aren’t allowed…. Oh, and enjoy your husband, because after you have kids, you won’t like him anymore. Or is that just me?
Ryan Ashley Scott’s last blog post..Chick Chat
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This is the best list EVER! I kept waiting for one of those things to not apply, but every single one did! Awesome!
Heather’s last blog post..Everybody’s Got Something to Hide Except Me and My Monkey
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Um, they should print this out and hand it out on the L&D floor of the hospital:)
brittany’s last blog post..Am sexy, y’all.
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This is one of your best posts ever. ‘Course, I like sentimental shit like that.
Texan Mama’s last blog post..The Price of Communication
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I love this post! I have been totally thinking about all this stuff lately and how I got here. :)
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hee,hee,hee. I keep telling my sister this; she’s itching to have a baby;)
Ginger’s last blog post..New Season, New Character . . .
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I wish someone had told me how much of a better person I would be, I would have done it sooner :)
Seriously sad about that little gem Maddie. I briefly looked at her story and she was beautiful.
Live.Love.Eat’s last blog post..Afternoon Delight
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Once my children were school age, I was able to pee with the door shut. But now for some reason my crazy cat thinks it’s okay to jiggle the door knob and walk right in……..I give up. :-/
Hope your day is beautiful.
Robin’s last blog post..Hot Cross Buns
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I miss spontanaeity sooo much since becoming a parent (oh, and the whole closing the bathroom door thing too!)
Gwyn’s last blog post..8 things….
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First, I can’t comment on your part 2.. but I have been reading EVERY single blog entry about little Maddie and telling everyone that walks by (cause I am at work) and this little bundle of energy just melts my heart. Thanks for sharing her story on your blog.
Second, you are so right. Before children we didn’t enjoy sleep! I wish I did. Cause I dream of it now, daydream of course. Our bodies, ha! I don’t know about all woman, but me.. I hated it now and hated it before, so that marks me off, lol. Fun car, I totally agree, I drove a Miata and it was FUUUN! But I remember the Pre-Kids days.. ahhhh. Travel? Yes.. MUCH more honeymooning, basking in the sun, and spooning were allowed on our travel dates, yummy! We don’t get those either :( Eat out, yes, thanks for reminding me that I can’t afford that $60 hibachi that I used to love soooo much. Spur of the moment, love it. No kids to get dressed or cleaned up.. I love the call into work, even though before kids, it still never worked for me. With kids, there is NEVER a day off, BUT I LOVE IT! Money on myself.. yay.. Door shut to use the restroom, yes, geesh. I loved #10 too.
Sorry, I am Crystal and I found your site through today’s chick chat, I wanted to stop by. After THOROUGHLY listening to 5 different video’s I am destined to become a great commenter. Your the first, I am sure it was too long, but thanks..
And, FYI I will stop by more often!!
Crystal’s last blog post..H-I-L-A-R-I-O-U-S
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I love this list! It’s all so true!
I always forget to lock the bathroom door and my son always barges in on me!
Kim’s last blog post..Curried Beef and Veggies
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Oh my goodness, I wish I’d been told that my life would never again be my own. That my body would expand and change in ways that are frightening. That I would never again sleep well. That regardless of all the responsibilities of being a mother, that I would never go back to being the person I was before I had children.
Susan
Over at “Raisin Toast”
Susan’s last blog post..Sarah Vaughn – Pianist, Composer … and full of Giggles ©
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I am SO taking advantage of my nap time while I can! Sleep is my favorite thing to do! Whenever I babysit my nephew for the day I am exhausted by the time he leaves! And he’s not a hyper kid, being a mom is hard work!
I only wish I was a mom, hopefully someday!
Kudos to all the mothers out there!
Pooba’s last blog post..Chick Chat
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I absolutely agree with your list!
georgie’s last blog post..I♥Jill
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That is is okay to hide from your children in the laundry room.
Hugs and Mocha,
Stesha
Twitter: SteshaSimsSays
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