03 · 19 · 2009

Casper & Me

Ben is the only child of mine who seems to have inherited the bulk of my physical traits. Looking into Lily and Evan’s eyes is just like looking into Jeff’s, while Ben’s shade of blue/green/gray look far more familiar. He has rough arms just like me and his oval face, hair color and dimples are all mine.

Another gift that he seems to have inherited from me is his complexion. I am pale. P.A.L.E. The shade of powder I use is the lightest one in the palette. After a bout with melanoma, I steer clear of the sun and my skin remains the same pasty shade regardless of the season. Ben is the same way. Every summer at the pool he is by far the palest child in site. While Lily gets a rosy summer glow, Ben’s skin seems to repel the sun.

I (finally) brought him back to school yesterday. After being stuck inside for two weeks recovering he has become an even lighter shade than usual. He’s almost translucent. Two hours after he arrived, I got a call from the director. Ben looks really pale, she said. I don’t think he’s feeling well at all. Worried, I asked how pale is he? Like “death warmed over” she responded as I grabbed Evan and darted over in lightening speed.

I opened the door to his classroom, expecting to find a lethargic, ailing Ben crying out for me. Instead he was sitting at the table happily eating his sandwich. Apparently he had been whining for me and combined with his appearance his teachers were concerned. Because he looked… pale.

We’re both heading to Mystic Tan this weekend.

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{ 39 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Julie B. March 19, 2009 at 9:14 pm

I’m even worse…super pale AND covered in freckles. So far, it seems that my 3 year old get tan, but the baby pretty much is white as a sheet. He’s got some scratched on his nose right now and from far away I can already see him as a mini-freckle-faced me. His eyes haven’t finished changing, I don’t think, but they look like they may end up hazel like mine.

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2 ViolinMama March 19, 2009 at 8:56 pm

Oh my goodness! Are we related? My daughter missed 2 weeks of PreK sick with fever and since we are so pale, she looked even more ghostly upon her return. How I can tell when she’s really ailing is the dark circles that will appear, otherwise we just look like we’re from Forks, WA and intermingle with the human population instead of feeding in them.

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3 ViolinMama March 19, 2009 at 8:57 pm

on them ;) not in them. That would require some special skills I can’t blog about just yet….

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4 Amber March 19, 2009 at 9:19 pm

I’m also very pale. Same with my kids.

In fact, my son tends to make people nervous if he’s out in the sun too long.

“He’s so pale. Does he have sunscreen? Is he okay out here?” It’s like, yes, of course he has sunscreen. He’ll be okay, concerned bystanders.

I need a tan though. I’m a little nervous about those mystic tans ever since Ross from the TV show Friends did something wrong and came out extremely dark. I can just see that happening to me.

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5 foradifferentkindofgirl (fadkog) March 19, 2009 at 9:50 pm

Ha! I am crazy pale, too, and so are my boys (aided by a generous slathering of SPF 50 every time they go near the door)(I’m a bit obsessive!), and the last time the school called to tell me my oldest son (who is NEVER sick) was in the office because he seemed very pale, I asked to talk to him and he said he was fine. I told him to tough it out, which wasn’t hard since he wasn’t even sick.

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6 cher March 19, 2009 at 11:28 pm

Hi……such a cute post! My husband and I are both melanoma survivors. My children thus far have tested negative (and they have had many biopsies). There is nothing wrong with PALE! I used to love being in the sun…now like u I cannot be. I slathered 50 and even a 65 SPF on my kids (got that one in Europe) since birth…but u know they hit the teen years and think they know more. Well last year, my daughter had a good scare. Had a mole on her leg that just appeared…she had tanned at the tanning booth. It was negative….but she has never returned to the booth. My dermatology team TOLD her….NEVER to go to one…if u have had melanoma or are an at risk patient for it…NEVER GO TO TANNING BOOTHS… just thought I would share…just keep lathering your kids up…I used to put it on at bedtime after a bath (as a moiturizer)….they didn’t know when they were little what I was doing lol…but they both thank me now. Your posts are very fun! Cher

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7 The Dental Maven March 20, 2009 at 4:06 am

Glad Ben is well enough to be back at school. And there ain’t nothin’ wrong with pale!

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8 christy March 20, 2009 at 5:35 am

Oh my god Jill you’re hysterical. You should totally put fake tanner on him and see what his teachers say on Monday! HAHA!

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9 John Deere Mom March 20, 2009 at 5:36 am

Ha! My son is the exact same way. My daughter is so pink and my son always looks sick!! Glad he was just pale and not really sick!

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10 christy March 20, 2009 at 5:39 am

Ooh and I forgot to mention – your button is now on my side bar. :)

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11 Scary Mommy March 20, 2009 at 5:41 am

@ cher– tanning booths are the DEVIL. I flip out if any of my friends go. But fake tans are wonderful. The ones that aren’t orange that is! (And at least we won’t be all covered in wrinkles when we’re old—- one good side to dealing with this young. :))

and LOL @Amber. I’m scared too solely because of Ross.

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12 Jaden March 20, 2009 at 5:59 am

lol… I am pale like that. I try not to be upset about my lack of color and instead think about how in 40 years, I’ll have a bit fewer wrinkles than those other old hags. ;)

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13 nikkicrumpet March 20, 2009 at 6:31 am

LOL…reminds me of my brother’s family. They live in Alaska so they don’t see a lot of sun during the year. His kids are so translucent you can see all their blood veins. It really is creepy…they look like extras from a vampire movie. They came to visit us one year and my neighbor pulls me aside and says with deep concern…”I think those children are very anemic….they really need to be taken to the doctor”.
Good thing is none of you will get all wrinkly!!!

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14 brittany March 20, 2009 at 7:33 am

My oldest is the same way, gotta love our irish glow:) My youngest is lucky, while he has my face, he has his daddy’s dark skin. JEALOUS! THIS is why I invested in a spray tanning machine for the house, best investment ever!

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15 Hockeyman March 20, 2009 at 7:57 am

Nothing wrong with cancer free skin. Although that may explain why people ask if I’m feeling ok all the time!

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16 Tiaras & Tantrums March 20, 2009 at 11:20 am

oh Lord – my son is the same way – although he will have a bit of a tan by the end of the summer. I DO NOT tan, in my 40′s I now get freckles – oops, corrections, as my Derm.gist says – age spots! Can you see all your veins? I can!

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17 dawn March 20, 2009 at 8:35 am

that must be pale!!!
but you know, good for you, the sun is so bad for you. so when you’re old and your boobs are in your shoes, you’ll at least hve great skin.

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18 Blissful Babe March 20, 2009 at 1:39 pm

LOL!!! That is too freaking funny.

I’ll meet you there.

:|

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19 Tiffany March 20, 2009 at 10:47 am

Gah, me too. I’ve always been pale…old ladies used to tell me I had the most beautiful porcelain complexion back in the day. But I always wished I could get just a little tan. I’m either ghost white or lobster red. And Lord help me if I get a bug bite or skin irritation. I get so pink and blotchy it looks like I have a disease. Both of my kids have inherited my skin..we’ll see what #3 gets.

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20 Elise March 20, 2009 at 10:48 am

Avoiding the sun was unthinkable when I was younger. Now I am a smidge more cautious. I’m getting more convinced though!

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21 Minxy Mimi March 20, 2009 at 11:36 am

Anonymom told me about you! I am glad your little one is feeling better. I am the opposite. Get me in the sun and I turn so dark! I truly think pale skin is beautiful!

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22 OHmommy March 20, 2009 at 12:15 pm

so glad the little dude is back in school. i need a tan too. and a pedicure. while im on it i need a good facial and my roots need to be died. PLEASE bring on spring…. i tend to re-awake then.

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23 Heather, Queen of Shake Shake March 20, 2009 at 12:23 pm

I’m fair-skinned too. You know having fair skin is a sign you were a blue-blooded aristocrat in a former life, right? When i tell people this while expecting them to wait hand and foot on me, they look at me like I’m crazy. As if!

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24 Swirl Girl March 20, 2009 at 4:09 pm

Unless there is actual blood or barf…NEVER go to school to pick up your kid. Pale , tanned or plaid.

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25 staciesmadness March 20, 2009 at 3:51 pm

poor guy

I am fair skinned but not really pale…or at least I think I’m not pale. :)

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26 Lizzie March 20, 2009 at 4:24 pm

thank god i am not the only pale person alive! my legs are where the translucent color is… i HATE shorts and am in pants or capris year round, when i head to the pool or the beach it’s like i crawled out of a cave.

glad he wasn’t sick, just light :)

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27 debbie March 20, 2009 at 8:28 pm

Pale is in! Don’t those people know anything!
I hate those rush right over to school trips to find out the kid is fine:)

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28 American in Norway March 21, 2009 at 3:35 am

Our entire family has the same skin… (once someone asked if Bjørn & I were brother& sister…THATS how much we all look alike…)
Summer they are a pretty brown-ish color…(even with 30 sun screen…) but in the winter… we all look like we have been locked in closets…
Notice my lack of pictures of the kids in the winter? (I know, I am a horrible mom)

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29 ourcrookedtree March 21, 2009 at 11:15 am

Ah yes. Being a red head that married a blond haired blue eyed boy, I am all too familiar with the term pale. To top things off for me; I flush easily. I can just think about goign to aerobics and start to sweat. My oldest is the same way; I had to warn his teachers so they would not call me after he played outside!

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30 Cristin March 21, 2009 at 8:50 am

I’m pasty pale too… year round. My kids both have much better coloring than I do.

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31 Casey March 21, 2009 at 9:33 am

My husband has gorgeous skin and tans on the first day of summer. I, instead, remain fair and uneven throughout the season. Praying our first born would inherit his lovely trait, I was thrilled to see his darker shade of skin the day he was born. We were so happy!

Then, we realized he had jaundice. Such idiots.

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32 Jen, buried with children March 21, 2009 at 10:50 am

They actually called? How funny.

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33 Preppy 101 March 21, 2009 at 6:48 pm

I just found your blog through Tales of a Northern Belle! It is great!! I’m sure gonna enjoy reading!!

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34 zelzee March 22, 2009 at 3:07 pm

I love summer but dread being so pale. I am a redhead, and tried so many horrid ways to tan when I was young……
Iodine & baby oil
Crisco
Laying on sheets of aluminum foil

Were we nuts or what?

Now I just stay white ………..and count my sun damage/age spots.

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35 Sapphire March 22, 2009 at 9:07 pm

Sorry, this is one topic to which I CANNOT relate. I’m pecan tan all year long + no sun damage!!! ;)

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36 Nan March 22, 2009 at 6:55 pm

I spend my life wearing a big hat, big shades, big sunblock, or else I will go red and peel. But my kids? Gorgeous. They go brown as nuts in the holidays. People laugh at me for putting sunblock on them but I am a compulsive sunblock-putter-onner.

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37 Jessica March 22, 2009 at 10:08 pm

P. used to have the craziest hair. People would always ask me if I brushed it and I’d say yeah, then I gave up b/c the second I walked away this is what it looked like

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38 Live.Love.Eat March 24, 2009 at 5:23 am

Funny but glad he wasn’t sick though. Pale is the new tan. It’s just not worth it.

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39 Caitlin March 26, 2009 at 6:47 pm

I feel you! I always get made fun of for being so pale, but I just say, “HELLO! The sun causes CANCER!”
Why doesn’t anyone get it?
Even my mother-in-law said, “Won’t Joseph look so good with a nice tan this summer?”
Um, no.
I feel your pain.
Cooked hamburger always looks better than raw, if you know what I mean.

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