From the category archives:

All About Me

Aug
19
2010

I’m not pregnant

I’m not pregnant. The three tests with cross expressions on their faces that are sitting in my bathroom trash confirmed it.

Considering that I have an IUD siting snugly in my uterus this should come as no surprise.

But, I woke up yesterday feeling like shit. My stomach was bubbly and crampy and I had heartburn radiating from my chest. Plus, I’ve been exhausted for weeks.

I bet you’re pregnant, Jeff suggested.

No, I responded. Impossible. I just had one too many Fiber One bars. And, I better not be. We cannot have a baby now.

But as the day wore on, I became less sure.

I cried at the end of Hotel for Dogs. I drank lemon tea and toast. I brainstormed just how we were going to tell the kids that we had to get rid of the puppy, but they would get a new sibling instead. I drafted announcement blog posts in my head. I found myself protecting my belly as Evan pounced on top of it. I cuddled with him on the couch and for one brief moment thought it might not be so bad to have another.

But, Jeff brought home a pack of tests and each of them instantly resulted in a single straight line.

This is a good thing. I would have been in hysterics if they were positive. We cannot afford a baby. It would have been a mess.

I just wish I didn’t feel so disappointed.

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Padma, Fluff and Stinky Cheese

08.11.2010

Hilshire Farm sponsored a booth at BlogHer and I was picked to make a sandwich for Top Chef judge Padma Lakshmi. I’m not a food blogger, but I love Top Chef and it sounded like a fun way to spend an hour in NYC. Plus, I make pretty good sandwiches. Or, not. I joked about [...]

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A toast to BlogHer10

08.10.2010

I used many words to describe BlogHer last year: Overwhelming, intense, exhausting. I was glad I went, but didn’t really love it. At all. This year was entirely different. The words that come to mind are fantastic, inspiring, fun, wonderful. To name a few. I loved meeting up with some of my favorite people from [...]

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I’m not really a sketchy weirdo, I just play one at BlogHer

08.03.2010

If you’re going to BlogHer, there are a few things about me that I’d like you to know: 1. I’m not an alcoholic. 2. I’m not really checking you out, I’m just doing some research. 3. I do not dance. 4. I may squeal/scream or jump up and down when I see you. Why do [...]

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Swell but Uncool

08.02.2010

Jeff and I saw a concert on Saturday night. It was Swell Season, the band that the movie Once featured. (If you haven’t seen it, you should.) Not so much our music genre, but they’re really good we can be edgy and all. You know, once a year. My deep observations from the (rare) late [...]

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My babysitter is a better mother than I am

07.29.2010

Jeff and I have been away for the past several days on Captiva Island, Florida (endless beaches, piña coladas and naps… ahhhh…) My house is being cared for by the A team consisting of my mother at night, the thirteen year old dog walker for Penelope and my college bound babysitter during the day. From [...]

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Project Mom

07.25.2010
Oh, so Scary

I never had a voice. I mean I had a voice, but not really a voice. I simply didn’t have much to say. I used to hate writing. I was told in high school that I clearly had no future in English and to concentrate on art instead. The highest I ever scored on a [...]

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Excuse me while I go vomit

07.19.2010

I threw Jeff a 30th birthday party a few years back. It was an intimate affair, filled with our closest friends and some family. Around 3o people. I worked for months coming up with the decor and the drinks and the menu. (Gold color tones and pomegranate martinis and appetisers galore. In case you wondered.) [...]

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How to read my blog: A cheat sheet

07.12.2010

I don’t consider myself a writer. I’m a blogger, plain and simple. My blog isn’t written in some elegant, poetic prose- it’s written in my voice. For good or bad. My husband has always made fun of me for singing my words. It’s not that I have a good voice — at all — but [...]

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