Two 1.5 pound lobsters from Maine: $29.95
One Lemon: $.50
Melted Butter: $2.50
Pair of Crackers: $6.99
Never craving lobster again: Priceless
I can’t eat chicken that I’ve prepared myself. Once I’ve touched it raw, it becomes totally unappetizing to me. The texture… the smell.. the fatty edges… At a restaurant or someones home, fine, but once I see its slimy pink flesh I just can’t consume it. Same with ground beef. Turkey too, for that matter. Yup, I have issues.
So, what on earth possessed me to purchase LIVE lobsters for dinner?
It seemed like a fine idea in my head… Jeff was away yesterday and my mom and I could enjoy something he doesn’t eat. I thought it would be an adventure, and I love me some lobster. I spent an hour researching cooking methods: The best way to hold them (behind the claws) and plunge them in the boiling water (head first.) I could do this, I thought. I am woman, hear me roar.
Problem is, I’m actually quite a pussy. The moment I opened the styrofoam box that housed them, I knew I had made a mistake. They peered up at me with their beady little eyes begging for mercy. Their little legs were squirming and their claws tied up in bands. They were ugly. They were disgusting– and I was supposed to eat them?! It took me a good twenty minutes after the water was boiling to get the courage to dunk them into their death pot. My heart was racing and sweat lined my forehead. It was awful. The was no screaming, or kicking or thrashing as I had feared. But when I opened up the pot after twelve minutes to take them out, all bright and red, I knew that my lobster eating days were over. In fact, it’s going to be some time before I’ll be eating any shellfish.
My mom said they were delicious. I’ll take her word for it.
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{ 36 comments… read them below or add one }
We always had lobsters around, my brother worked on a lobster boat and brought them home all the time. We’d put them in the bathtub to hang out until it was time for the dip of death….
I’d make painful screaming noises as mom dropped them into the pot.
I’ve NEVER eaten lobster. EVER.
I felt the same way when I saw this episode of Iron Chef where the chefs mutilated live dungeness crabs.
I didn’t eat crab for a while after that.
OMG, I’m laughing. But I too never buy the live lobsters, it’s too sad!
Yeah. I had my first time actually killing a loster this summer. I made my brother’s friend do it. I still ate it but I felt bad.
Creepy….
I’ve heard it takes some bravery to actually cook them yourself — I’m impressed. Sorry you couldn’t enjoy them!
Have you ever had steak tartar? This just made me think of it. DISGUSTING. I cannot handle raw meat-smells like blood. Eeeeeeeew
That is kinda funny, but sorry you missed out on your dinner. That reminds me of a time I was craving lemon meringue pie and made it myself, then I could not eat it thinking about all those egg whites in there, ick.
And the smell that Lobster left in the house will haunt us all for days…
Meanie. But if you had cooked themI would have eaten them. So call me next time, K?
Jill,
I am so sorry I wasn’t aroudn to talk you through it. You better be able to eat shellfish the next time I come to visit though!!!
I don’t eat seafood. I’m sure I’m missing out but can’t get past the texture. You are brave indeed.
I cooked live lobsters once. Your Mom made me do it. She was too chicken to throw them into a pot of boiling water herself. I heard them thrashing and then screaming. I swear I did. Never again!
I think this is a political metaphor for yesterday’s entry. Sarah Palin would not have any issues with killing live lobsters or with hunting and shooting moose in cold blood. Hell, she has no problem with forcing her 17-year old daughter to get married, have her baby, and simply ruin the rest of her life. Instead of teaching abstinence which obviously does not work, she should have been teaching about birth control. Palin can surely kill lobsters but she would never advocate preventing young women from getting pregnant. This is best of family values. Palin is the kind of woman we need for president, NOT.
Love, Dad
jesus christ woman! Almost $30 a pound? where are you? Dubai? next time call me and I’ll walk down to the boats and send you a couple of cooked ones.
One day when my parents were still naive (I was 5) they took my brother and I to the grocery store. They wanted to try to make lobster and explained to us that we were going to eat these little critters. My brother (4 at the time) and I begged to pick them out. They let us and we carried them home in the cute little lobster boxes.
Then my mother tried to cook them. Big mistake. We saw her drop them in and I screamed “NO! NOT MY FRIEND!!!” Needless to say we had pizza that night.
Whoa, okay first of all, DAD, I’m sure you’re a wonderful man. After all, you spawned the Scary Mommy! But, for one day, step away from the soapbox. Let’s all just play nice, K? I like SM but I am also a McCain/Palin supporter and you are dangerously close from driving me, a subscribed reader, away. Don’t know if that’s okay with her, but let’s leave the political comments to days with a political post. WHew.
Now, you never prepare chicken either? What in the world does your family eat? I admit I will not do as my mom did – take a whole roaster and just yank and cut till I’ve got a cut-up chicken for frying. No thanks. I can barely do a fried chicken leg (I hate that little fat gristle thing that hangs down from the main piece of meat. Ew.) And lobster, yes I’ve had it too and that nasty green (fat?) stuff grossed me out and I have never had it since. But girlfriend you are gonna have to get comfy with some foods or else your family is gonna go broke eating out.
Cristin- “the dip of death” LOL.
thegirlof510, I’m hoping I can still handle crab. That would be so tragic if I were turned off to them too!!
Noble, I can’t believe that you haven’t cooked lobster. You are my kitchen idol!!
scargosun, I think if someone else had done it, it wouldn’t have been so disturbing. Maybe.
Lemon, yup :)
Merrie, I am glad I can cross it off my list, and think of the money I’ll save by never eating it again!!
Lauren, Ugh, no. And my beef is always well done. Why would I want a plate of blood?!
Andrea, eggs are nasty if you think about it. Pretty much everything is!
Jill, Let’s just have drinks, K? :)
Jess, Where were you when I needed you? I think I can still handle our place.
Mel, normally, I’d try to convince you of what you were missing, but not today. I’m not there yet ;)
Dad, You better not drive my readers away. Play nice!
Dawn, it was thirty bucks for both, and so not worth it. Don’t bother sending me shellfish, but I’d love some of your desserts to arrive at my doorstep, please.
Amanda, LOL. I had yogurt. ;)
Texas, You’re right- We’ll keep the politics on the other post. Can we just agree to disagree and all get along?
And, I prepare chicken often, I just can’t eat it myself. I’ll eat a salad and the sides. I know, it’s crazy. Another charming characteristic I get from my dad ;)
I’ve yet to have lobster that didn’t taste rubbery, so I can’t sympathize with your loss. It’s terrible the way they just dunk ‘em, though! You know, there’s a certain way you can insert a knife that will kill them right before you put them in the water. They say it’s just as good.
Was it Kofka or Stephen King that wrote about a man suddenly able to hear everyone’s thoughts, then went to dinner and heard the lobsters scream as they were dropped in?
I totally couldn’t eat lobster if I had to boil it… it gives me the wiggles just thinking about it!
I love lobster but I can honestly say there is no way I would be able to cook one!
I could give me that little sucker and I will show him who is boss. I love me some crawfish, lobster, crabs, well anything with a shell I guess. Me and my little girl ate some snow crab legs today. So Good! Much Love to you.
I agree with your dad :) But ok ok, on the other post. This is a free country texan mama! Agree to disagree :)
And I think if I had to kill my dinner, I would be a vegetarian. Kudos to you for trying. You have more balls than me!
Now this is an odd sensation… you have made me laugh and feel queasy all at the same time.
Ugh,
I read this post before I ate my breakfast, and now I don’t think I can eat anything today!
I agree with what Marty said – I, too, laughed and felt like I could throw up at the same time.
Every year we have a big party where we make blue craw crabs, corn on the cob, etc. I don’t eat shellfish, so I make my husband clean every single crab before I will cook them. He does something where he pops the shell off (kills ‘em instantly) and then he cleans them all up. Makes me shudder thinking of it. At least I only have to drop those stinky suckers into the boiling water and I personally didn’t do the dirty deed.
When my grandma was a girl growing up in Australia, they had chickens, but one of them they kept as a pet. Apparently, only to the kids was it a pet. “Charlie” ended up in the center of the table one night, cooked to perfection. My grandmother and her 3 sisters all refused to eat it. Go Granny!
Blogger just ate my comment.
I made live lobster once too. Once. Putting something live in boiling water just feels wrong. :)
You never would have survived in our house. Stephen and I would each pick a lobster and then have a “race.” Usually one of them went backwards and the winner progressed a total of 2 centimeters on our kitchen floor.
Perhaps the pink tile and little kid feet was too stark a contrast to the sandy floors of the ocean.
You are a brave woman! I’m afraid that the fact the only meat is I eat is fish will keep me from EVER trying this at home. Thank you for the warning!
I don’t think I could kill anything before I eat it, but ifs already dead and raw, meh…let me at it! What did you do with the left overs? 2 lobsters, one mother in law….why didn’t you invite one of us over!?! :P
Oh my. My mom used to throw all kinds of stuff into pots alive – clams, crabs etc. We would talk in little voices while she did it “noooooo! help meeeeeeee!”
Poor mom. Poor Scary Mommy.
Doesn’t it look like a big icky insect though?
Oh dear, oh dear!! I’ve never tried to cook lobsters, but I have boiled crawfish and felt a little guilty too.
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I don’t blame you in the least. I could never cook Lobster. I’m just glad I don’t like seafood to start with.
And I used to have issues with touching raw meat, but those disappered after the birth of my 1st child. Who knew?!
I met someone in a seafood shop at the beach last summer who does a funny thing with their lobsters. First of all, they had 15 people staying at their beach house, and bought one lobster for each. They pick up the lobsters, and bring them home. Then, before they put them in the boiling water, they have a “lobster race” on the kitchen floor. This, apparently, is a tradition in some parts of New England. Hmmmm…I can only imagine the chaos! BTW, I’m hosting a Recipe Week on my blog, starting tomorrow. Please stop by and see what’s cookin’!
I cannot believe all the bleeding hearts here!! People have eaten many different things for thousands of years. If you people cannot deal with the truth, then become vegans. I personally have no problem knowing where my food comes from and dealing with it.I suppose you believe hamburger grows in a styrofoam plate and has a plastic wrap skin.
As for Dad, I won’t even go there. People who can survive and take care of themselves and their family are exactly the people we need in charge in this country!!
BigG2,
I won’t even start on the politics. As for the lobster, there is a big difference between eating meat and killing it a few minutes before eating it. At least to some people.
At first my mouth watered when I read the title of your post, and then I remembered. Once a friend of mine, who happened to live in Maine at the time, who I happened to be visiting in Maine at the time, decided to take me out for a whole lobster. Having grown up in Arizona I had only had lobster tail at Red Lobster. Hardly an initiation. So, I was a bit grossed out, especially when I made the mistake of cracking open the body. Ugh. It was a long time before I could eat it again.
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