- So glad you called. I love to hear about your perfect house and all the stuff you bought. Just give me a minute - I can't hear over DD coughing. Yup, she's sick again. Sorry, what was that about how great your life is?
- I used to be thin without trying. After four kids and three c-sections, I work my ass off to maintain "chubby."
- I breastfeed and smoke cigarettes.... I'm such a failure
- Had a day out without any of the children/H...visiting my dad in the hospital after a heart attack. I admit, I wanted to bail and go to the mall down the road.
- My boss was such a dick when I left my job to be a SAHM that I'm considering snipping the tire stems on his car. It'll be killing two birds with one stone-revenge and a nice little outing away from my 3 kids.
- Tonight I understand why people beat their kids.
- Got high and matsturbated so furiously to thoughts of Tom Hiddleston (as Loki) that I chafed my vagina. I'm embarrassed at myself.
- I get so painfully jealous of the fashion choices young women have now. And their artsy hangouts. The young guys dress so much better now too. I'm. so. jealous. It's ridiculous.
- Apparently, DS11m can turn on the heater. In the room that also houses our only A/C unit. At least now I know why it was so hot in here.
- Went to a local restaurant for a school fund raiser. The principle comes over to chat with my daughter while im enjoying a margarita.as a single mom sometimes I just need a drink....maybe not a school events. Mommy fail?
- I starve myself so that people will tell me how skinny I am. I have a 2yo daughter and I can't believe what a horrible example I am being.
- I can't bring myself to fart in front of DH. I will either hold it or go to another room. I honestly don't know why I care because I don't think farting is a big deal. The older I get, the weirder I become.
- An old lady I was taking care of today asked if I was pregnant or just fat. It didn't bother me. I just don't care anymore. The answer is I'm fat
- Often times, I'll fix my bowl of cereal and pop it in the fridge while I get some things done. I love soggy cereal - especially peanut butter "crunch."
- Today I broke the toliet seat....just sat down and SNAP!! pinched a welp on my bum.....feel like a cow already and 30weeks of pregnancy left....hope I dont gain alot with this baby.....