- So glad you called. I love to hear about your perfect house and all the stuff you bought. Just give me a minute - I can't hear over DD coughing. Yup, she's sick again. Sorry, what was that about how great your life is?
- 50 Shades trailer piqued my curiosity, and now that I've read the trilogy I think people overreacted to the books. Yeah, there's some kinky shit, but I liked the love story better.
- I am ashamed at how much I yell at my kids. I swore I wouldn't with my 2 year old and went off on her yesterday when she wouldn't nap.
- I don't even think Gisele Bundchen is pretty but I have an odd fascination with her and her family
- My husband's co worker just offered to screw my brains out. I'm considering it.
- I love my cross dressing DH! Not only do I get a manly man and all that includes but I also get a woman(at least in some ways) and all that includes as well! I would never go back to a "normal" man!
- Just washed down two chocolate cupcakes with a tumbler full of margarita.
- If my DH asks me one more time, "why is she crying?" I am going to lose it. She's 2 months old, that's what babies do!!! Pick her up for gods sake!
- My gay BFF wants me to be a surrogate for his baby. He has an egg so the baby won't be biologically mine. We are both tenured professors. I want to help my friend out and I really need the money.
- I don't love my stepdaughter. I don't even think I like her. I'm tolerating her until she leaves for college - in 4 years.
- My dad had a sex change.
- I love him so much and I lie to myself. I hide my feelings under my make up and smile and new relationship.
- I would jump Doug Hehner from Married at First Sight. I got myself off earlier today thinking about it.
- I'm ashamed that I pay more attention to my love triangle than I do to my children. .
- My MIL is so uneducated and annoying! I'm secretly waiting for the day she croaks.
- My husband decided to join the military. I'm excited to have all this time away from him. It's like a temporary separation, but I still get paychecks. Winning.