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Scary Mommy Confessions

Confession #197162

  • Come near me again and you're dead, bitch. The police won't stop the stalking, you won't leave my family alone. It's been almost twenty years of your shit. I will kill you if you come near us again.

More Confessions

  • I videotaped the sound of my babies crying at the same time so DH could see how hard it is to take care of both of them and give me a break this weekend.

  • MIL buys tacky cheap clothes and toys for my kids. I sell it at a resale store. I don't get much but its something and I dont have to have all that cheap crap at my house.

  • I, the adult in the room, just told dd, the 4 year old, "too bad so sad".

  • When you dress your daughter in pajamas because you thought it was spirit week and find out it is next week.

  • My almost 2 yr old is scared of her poop. She screams bloody murder every time she sees it. Potty training won't be happening any time soon.

  • Spanked dd2.5 really hard. 3 times today she got into the eggs and threw them all over the kitchen while I went pee. Now I feel like shit for spanking. I've never spanked her before

  • I almost never wash fruit before giving it to my kids, and even if I do, it's just a rinse with plain water.

  • My 6yo could honestly live on apples, grapes, hotdogs, and mac and cheese. She almsot never eats what the rest of us have.

  • My goal weight is just to weigh less than my husband.

  • I throw out, donate, or return the majority of gifts from my mother. She gives us WAY too much stuff and I can't stand the clutter.

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