- Come near me again and you're dead, bitch. The police won't stop the stalking, you won't leave my family alone. It's been almost twenty years of your shit. I will kill you if you come near us again.
- I hate hate when people post on Facebook about their dead or sick kids
- Being a good mother is so hard to do.. Especially, when majority of your stress comes from motherhood. Ugh! Sometimes I wish that I would've stayed a virgin!!
- DH and DS lie to me about the smallest, stupidest things. It is unbelievably frustrating.
- I still have to write a note or email to tell someone we need to have a serious conversation. I'm almost fucking 30 years old
- I'm 35, but my kids tell everyone I'm 30. I don't correct them and don't plan on it until I start looking my age.
- I signed DS up for extra private swim lessons because I think the instructor is adorable. Sigh. To be 18 again.
- My dss mom is a prostitute.
- I was always the REALLY skinny chick growing up who people assumed had an eating disorder. I prayed to gain weight!! 5'4" was 100lb when got married. 3 kids later am 145!!! God, I miss being skinny even if judged for it.
- I can watch hours of say yes to the dress. No hopes to get married again.
- I sometimes think about how much better my first husband would have handled all this shit.
- I have to call banks and utility companies and pretend to be my mom, bc she is completely incapable of handling even the most basic business transaction.
- I feel about as feminine as a tractor trailer.
- I audibly fart in front of my DH and kiddos when we're at home. My house too, and after holding it in at work all day, I'm sure as hell not holding it in at home.
- I've been using special shampoo supposed to make my hair grow and taking prenatal vitamins. In 2 months my hair's only grown an inch. The hair on my head, at least. My pubes, eyebrows and chin hairs are another story.
- DH suggested 'we' implement a hand wash day every other day because our water bill was so high last month. Wanted to be like 'Who is we?' I do it the easy way every day because no one else touches them.