- FREEDOM! Mom took my daughter to best buy, DH took our boys to see their great granny...im allll alone. And a lil sick so i have every reason to curl up in a dark room and fall asleep and no one can give me hell! =)
- I haven't had sex in so long, I can barely remember how it feels like.
- My husband only wants to have anal sex. Is it because the old vagina are not as tight after four kids? Screw him--the extra 50lbs he has gained doesn't help me get off any easier either....
- There are days that I consider packing the back of the van with whatever I think I can't live without, & taking off with the bank account. Alone.
- 9 weeks into parenthood and if I don't get laid soon I'm going to lose my mind! wtf is wrong with my husband? Am I that unattractive now?!
- had a bad dream bf added our relationship on FB my dh would be so pissed.
- I clean for and hour every day before my DS2's speech therapist comes, only to apologize for the mess.
- I had an abortion I told everyone I had a miscarriage.
- I'm pretty sure I'm a better mom and all around person when I smoke weed, but I feel guilty about doing it so I haven't smoked in years.. I'm a huge jerk to everyone as a result.
- Every time I pee it gets all over the place down there- the bottom of my cheeks, the crease on both sides, and I have to wipe it all down section by section. WTF why can't the stream go straight in the toilet?!?!
- My "secret boyfriend" is married with children. So am I. I'm in love with him. I only feel slightly guilty about this whole scenario.
- Flo the Progressive Lady and the Swiss/Dutch/German? Toaster Strudel kid freak me the hell out. Make a haunted house out of that!
- Im not white but it's scary how white trash I am. I embrace it like its a culture.
- 10 more years until my youngest is out of the house and I can get away from this asshole. Yes I am staying for the kids but it's like a prison sentence.
- I want to be married to a grown ass man, not this emotionally immature and overly sensitive nutjob I ended up with.
- Omg I somehow ended up with a few hours alone, a lortab, and a bowl! Def Win!!!