- My ass hurts severely. When I shit, it feels like I'm shitting glass. I don't want to go to the Dr.
- I buy my clothes at garage sales and my makeup at Sephora.
- My baby farts lots. Usually when my husband is holding him. So my husband got one back and whilst he was in his stroller, my husband walked up stood in front of him and farted. I feel bad cos i laughed.
- Last night when we were having sex, I felt sure for the first time that my DH really loves me. We've been married for 12 seriously rough years.
- I was diagnosed with adult ADHD yesterday. It explains SO much, but I'm so embarrassed.
- I cannot stand my future son in law. He's an arrogant ass. It takes great strength to not punch him one.
- I'm 40 and still don't know how to cook.
- I judge H and my in-laws because the highlight of their month is a family trip to Walmart on the first. I cringe with embarrassment when I go with them. They don't know that this is a bad stereotype.
- I don't bother shaving anything other than armpits when I go to the gyno.I'm an RN who works for one and trust me, we don't even notice if patients are hairy on vulva and/or legs, although I notice armpits for some reason
- I am 50 pounds heavier than H. I used to weigh 103...hate that this happened.H thinks it's bc I'm lazy and undisciplined.Really it's the psych meds I need to put up with him when he tries to shred me to pieces.
- Married with 3 kids...just missed my period and if im pregnant its from another married man whoes not my husband :(
- I would rather a 10 minute nap than a 10 minute orgasm.
- If I were ever going to commit murder, I would dress like a man, wear a fake moustache and men's cologne of someone familiar so he would get framed.
- Ex was emotionally abusive. Looking back, the fact that he was noticeably less intelligent than I embarrasses me even more than the fact that I fell for an abuser. I'm too smart to be this stupid. I did dump him. Win?
- I have a 2 year old who I am still breastfeeding. I lie about it and say im not. She has never spent a night in her own bed which I also lie about
- I hate maternity shoots, I think they look tacky and especially the ones where they are just covering their chest with their hands and standing there in their undies.