- I'm sick of my husband treating ds3 like he's 7 or 8 and should behave a certain way or know certain things. Do some child behavior research, get a clue you fucking nimrod!
- If there was a restart button, I would have gone to dang sperm bank to have baby. My ex is useless
- My DS comforts himself while breastfeeding by shredding his diaper. My house is covered with little white confetti pieces of diaper every DAMN day. Carpet always looks like a parade just passed by. I now resent my vacuum. Wtf
- I really want to but a super cheap house and remodel the fuck out of it.
- I make over $200k and buy used clothes on eBay.
- Sent DH to the store for donuts after I made DS a healthy b-fast which he refused to eat. Eating something is better than nothing. I secretly love to watch my kid on a sugar high. He's hilarious.
- Ate a donut and drank a michelob ultra for breakfast. Yep. It's gonna be one of those days. Aunt Flo is officially in town.
- I train myself out of my disgusting habits by pretending Im on my own version of the Truman Show. The idea that millions may be watching me pick my nose makes me think twice
- I am 36 and wear granny panties and lunch lady bras and love them.
- I still pick my nose and eat the boogers.
- I am Christian but I struggle so much with actually believing all of this stuff. I wish I was like other Christians who are just so happy in their faith and really believe it. Seems like such a peaceful way to live.
- I hide in the kitchen and eat cold left overs out of the fridge while the kids play video games in the living room. Then when they come in for something I pretend I was cleaning the fridge.
- I love my dh with all my heart, and have never been tempted to infidelity, but I really, really hope his friends/work acquaintances think I'm hot.
- I'm supposed to be watching my weight. Last night before supper I ate my weight in hummus and pita chips and washed it down with root beer. Then I ate supper.
- I watched my sister kill herself with food. I'm scared I'll end up like her.
- Just found the Bailey's DH was hiding from me! One more cup of "coffee" and we can start on DS homework without losing my mind! WIN :-)