Scary Mommy Confessions
- I know when I'm ovulating because it makes perfect sense to get pregnant with BF. Lasts 1 week. As soon as the egg is gone b/c not fertilized, I can list a million reasons not to get pregnant again, EVER.
- I fantasize about bashing my DDs' Garanimals keyboard repeatedly until the ground whenever DD1 presses a certain key. Who thought the satanic chorus of kids was a good addition to this toy??
- Single mom for 4 yrs straight! I tell my self Im the Denise Richards type of single mom.But really im a broke,chubby,mediocre looking single mom whose soon to be evicted from my shack! I'm ment to be Denise Richards dammit!
- I am 32 yrs old & breaking out like a damn teenager!! I'm married with twin boys (11 mo old) and this is the LAST thing I should have to worry about. Its making me so self conscious & I always think that's all people see.
- On a diaper budget until pay hits on Tuesday, thanks to an unexpected lady minute expense. Not sure if I can make it... I'm seriously debating stealing diapers from the store.
- My cycle is incredibly off. This is so painful!!! I don't think this is a period. I think I'm miscarrying again. :-(
- I pretend we are BFFs but my SIL hurt me so bad I will never trust her again.
- I'm up at 4:30am reading SM, DS12 decided to sleep with me and is totally laying all over my back...I have farted on him several times
- binge watching porn because the h is out of town. so many orgasms. so little h. perfect!
- I sometime worry my DH is gay. Otherwise he is just a repressed prude. I'd rather him be gay and let me move on if this is what our marriage will always be.
- When all my friends talk about having Christmas shopping done, I say nothing because I don't know what that feels like. I haven't had any money this time of year for 5 years. Any gifts I get are sold to pay bills.