Facebook Friends


Facebook is an amazing phenomenon. It has allowed me to reconnect with countless old friends and meet family members I never knew existed. It bridges the distance between states, countries and time zones and makes staying in touch a breeze. Over the summer, I attended a reunion of my grade school class, most of whom I hadn’t seen in close to twenty years. It was wonderful to catch up, swap stories and meet each other’s children. Facebook makes it a breeze to share stories, introduce new babies and snoop on old crushes. It’s pretty cool thing.

Except sometimes, it’s not. Like, what about those friends you actually wanted to lose touch with? If you really wanted to maintain a relationship, wouldn’t you have?* Some faces should remain just where you left them, in the past. With social media these days it’s almost impossible to do that. And then, there are the faces that you forget altogether. A few years back, I deleted my MySpace account because, for the life of me, I could not remember this girl who supposedly was a good friend of mine. She talked about our late night talks and classes together and I had absolutely no idea who she was. So, I deleted my account rather than deal with the situation. She has yet to track me down on Facebook, but I’m waiting.

My very first Facebook friend request was from a super sweet girl who I went to college with. At the time, I had been dealing with some major e-mail spam and was suspicious of a last name I did not know, and the picture was way too small to recognize. So I declined her request. And then, to make matters worse, I blocked her. Later, I saw her on my husband’s page and felt like an idiot. (Duh, Jill, he said, She got married and changed her name. Whoops.) After that, I became more liberal about accepting invitations, which has resulted in friends who I literally do not know. We may have friends in common or I know their spouse, but have no idea who they are. What’s the point of having friends like that?

Most of the applications make no sense to me. Scrabble, I get. Trivia, ok. But personally, I’ve never liked being pelted with tomatoes or eggs. If someone presents me with flowers or cupcakes I want them to be real and I have a hard enough time accessorising myself without worrying about how glitzy my page looks. It’s all just so stresful!

So, I try to limit my Facebook presence; between the applications, the games, the photos and the chats, one could waste days there. It’s a major time sucker and I, for one, just don’t have the time for that. I’m way too busy wasting time here.

*If we are Facebookfriends, this does not apply to YOU. I adore YOU and am thrilled to be back in touch. This is about all of those other people, but most definitely, positively not YOU. Kisses!


The Scary Mommy Community is built on support. If your comment doesn't add to the conversation in a positive or constructive way, please rethink submitting it. Basically? Don't be a dick, please.

  1. 1

    Mom Taxi Julie says

    So so true, I have a ton of friends on Facebook now. I think I have my whole elementry school and most of my Jr. High and High School.

    Mom Taxi Julie’s last blog post..Just a little farther

    Show Replies
  2. 2

    DrZibbs says

    Which is why I only have blogger friends on Facebook.

    Want to be friends? I’m Jim Zibbs.

    DrZibbs’s last blog post..Lady Bug Picnic on Sesame Street. Nice Kazoo and Jews Harp Playing.

    Show Replies
  3. 3

    T Rex Mom says

    Great flashback – I enjoy reading what people are up to via facebook but the folks that update a dozen times a day I have to block – it fills up my entire page. I call them “crackbook addicts”.

    T Rex Mom’s last blog post..My First Award…

    Show Replies
  4. 4

    Tiffany says

    Ugh, so agree! I have a FB…but only because some of my friends who I wanted to stay in touch with were deleting their MySpace accounts and moving to FB. I hate FB.

    I recently got a string of Friend requests from some girls I went to Catholic School with. (We weren’t Catholic, but that was the only good private school around, and I had caused too much trouble…so mom sent me there!). Anywhoo, these girls were like “mean girls” back in the day. Made my life hell. Now they’re all “OMG Tiffany how are you what cute kids so nice to find you”. Yea. Whatevs.

    Besides, I’m on twitter too much to deal with FB!

    Tiffany’s last blog post..Flashback Friday

    Show Replies
  5. 5

    Vic says

    That pic is so true of half the facebook requests I get. I have to admit, I pay very little attention to it these days. There’s more important things…

    Show Replies
  6. 6

    natasha the exile on Mom Street says

    I couldn’t agree more! I hate facebook (but lurve me some Twitter).

    I intentionally did not use my maiden name in my facebook profile specifically to keep people from my past IN my past where they BELONG.

    Got have to have been my friend in “real life” or the blogosphere in the past 6 years to find me. Quite satisfying, really.

    natasha the exile on Mom Street’s last blog post..Flashback Friday: word games

    Show Replies
  7. 7

    natasha the exile on Mom Street says

    Argh, why don’t you see typos in your comment until AFTER it’s posted?

    Off for what appears to be a much-needed second cup of coffee. Sigh.

    natasha the exile on Mom Street’s last blog post..Flashback Friday: word games

    Show Replies
  8. 8

    Kate Coveny Hood says

    One problem with FB is that once you pass a certain number of friends, it’s impossible to keep up with their updates. I have been pretty lucky in that I mainly have people I want to be in touch with on my Friends list – but there is always one or two people who would be better left in the past…

    I’ll post my Flashback Friday later this afternoon! It’s part two of last week’s post (I was into “the series” back in the olden days last summer)

    Kate Coveny Hood’s last blog post..I Cried Yesterday

    Show Replies
  9. 9

    Futureblackmail says

    Love this post.

    And what’s the deal with the plants – why am I always getting plants sent to me?!?!

    Futureblackmail’s last blog post..AND NOW IT’S A HABIT

    Show Replies
  10. 10

    dawn says

    I like facebook to vent and stay in touch with my cali friends. Twitter, I don’t know why, but I’m growing to hate it. I think because it takes forever to load or it’s over capacity. Why do people go to it, still, with so many problems? I dunno.

    dawn’s last blog post..tropical chicken salad

    Show Replies

Load More Comments

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>