Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy
What started as an innocent on-line baby book to chronicle Jill's stay-at-home days with her children, (Lily, Ben, and Evan) quickly transformed into a vibrant community of parents, brought together by a common theme: Parenting doesn’t have to be perfect. Learn more here.
@scarymommy
NYT bestselling author of Confessions of a Scary Mommy and Motherhood Comes Naturally (And Other Vicious Lies). Fond of curse words, sarcasm and Diet Coke.
@jaimeparker So happy to hear that - thank you!!! - 9 hours ago
Latest posts by Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy (see all)
- The Disney Reveal - May 14, 2013
- Met My Match At Disney… - May 13, 2013
- Sunday’s Baltimore Sun - May 11, 2013
The differences between mothers and fathers, as told by the latter:
- When your two-year old throws up in the car, mothers feel pity and sorrow. Fathers throw up too.
- Mothers view poop on their fingers as par for the course. Fathers hyperventilate and swear off changing poopy diapers ever again.
- Mothers look at an empty fridge and whip up a yummy dinner with what small amount of food remains. Fathers order pizza. Or Chinese, in this father’s case.
- Mothers’ hearts melt when their toddlers pout so profoundly that their top lip is totally obscured. Fathers think “grow a pair.”
- Mothers pack “breakdown bags” filled with goodies for long road trip and/or other endeavors that could potentially lead to meltdowns. Fathers take two valium before igniting the care engine.
What would this world do without mothers who compensate for all of the bullshit we dads put them through?
Happy mother’s day to the wonderful women who make this world go round, and a special xoxo to Scary Mommy, without whom my life would be empty.
{ 51 comments… read them below or add one }
Ha! Nicely put Jeff! I laughed out loud because 6 weeks ago on the way to the airport Oliver vomited all over me. I kept smiling because I didn’t want Oliver to feel badly about getting car sick and all Brett did was slide over as far as he could in the backseat of the cab with his jaw on the ground in disbelief.
Very sweet of you to recognize good mommy-ness, but it sounds like your a fab daddy yourself!
Haha!! Scary Daddy is as funny s Scary Mommy!!! Love this post!
.-= Stephanie´s last blog ..Glittersniffer Giveaway =-.
–>You are so very right!
.-= WebSavvyMom´s last blog ..Flashback Friday (part 56) – All Dogs Go to Heaven =-.
Awwww, so sweet….and so true!!
Have a great weekend and a Happy Mother’s Day!
.-= AmazingGreis´s last blog ..Prom… =-.
Nicely put!!! So true.
Happy Mother’s Day to all my mommy friends.
You Know you are a mom when… (Check out this list)
http://parenting-happinesstochaos.blogspot.com/
.-= Tiffany´s last blog ..You Know You’re a Mom When… =-.
Good list! In my house though 4 is reversed. Maybe it’s because I’m a bad mommy or maybe it’s because Dad is totally wrapped around their little fingers here…
M
ps – I like how you mentioned how empty your life would be without Scary Mommy… very sweet.
So true!! Great post! My ex-husband use to roll his eyes at my “breakdown” backpack!! It is a MUST !!! Happy Mother’s Day !!!
awww – I love this! Especially the poopy diaper one. Except I wish I could cross it off forever. :S
.-= S Club Mama´s last blog ..Plan B {review} =-.
Uh oh, Jill, he just totally compensated for being born on Mother’s Day.
Seriously. What a prick.
Love it! Did you see The Middle on TV the other night…hysterical about how Moms just want to be left ALONE on Mother’s Day and how Father’s Day is always great b/c Moms are in charge!
.-= Rebecca´s last blog ..Teacher Note: Know Your Students’ Backgrounds =-.
No!! But that sounds spot on. :)
Awww…it’s like you are living in my house.
Except my hubby would be the one cooking up great meals with no food. I’d just starve.
.-= Allison´s last blog ..Vegas Baby =-.
poop on the fingers!!!!! i was totally eating falafel balls with tahini sauce, and could not anymore.
you guys are so gnarly
.-= vanillasugar´s last blog ..quarter pound double chocolate cookies =-.
OMG. That is so fabulous. Kudos to Scary Daddy!
Thanks for the Mom Love!
Happy Mother’s Day, Jill!
xoxo
.-= BlissfulBabe´s last blog ..Oh, If Only. =-.
That was great and so very true!!! Way to man up and admit that woman are the superior ones around here. :) It’s wonderful to see a man who truly appreciates his wife for all the amazing things she does.
Haha! That’s WONDERFUL!
.-= jen´s last blog ..who’s your daddy? =-.
Thumbs up, Scary Daddy — nice work, Dude.
.-= carolyn´s last blog ..Mother’s Day: 100% Off. =-.
My husband loved this. Thanks.
I sure couldn’t do it without my husband’s humor and support though!
.-= Liz´s last blog ..Wanting to be Pregnant? =-.
When the kid passes out while getting blood drawn the dad goes completely white and panics. (My poor father, that’s happened to him TWICE now.)
.-= Molly´s last blog ..Little Tikes =-.
So cute…..way to go Scary Daddy!!!!
.-= Emma´s last blog ..Excitement – Part 2!!!!! =-.
Sounds like Scary Daddy knows exactly how to make Scary Mommy happy on mother’s day…
.-= amber´s last blog ..My Top Ten Strategies For Keeping It Sexy. =-.
That ScaryMommy is, indeed, pretty spectacular. And she’s married to a pretty funny guy!
.-= TheKitchenWitch´s last blog ..Happy Mother’s Day =-.
Great post Scary Daddy!! My husband is right there with you on the Chinese take-out ~ his go to!
.-= Rachel´s last blog ..Open Letter to New Moms =-.
OMG! And I thought it was just my husband! Feeling so much better! Thanks for this as my husband’s too busy making excuses to say something this sweet!
.-= kathy´s last blog ..Back to nature in the backyard! =-.
Yes! Yes! Yes!
I am packing a “breakdown” bag as we speak for our seven hour car ride tomorrow (with a two year old and a 3 month old) so I especially laughed at that.
My husband looked at all of the treats and said “why does he need that? He can just look out the window.”
.
.
I repeat: seven hour car ride, and he’s two.
Sigh.
What a great tribute!
Niiiiiiice.
.-= amanda´s last blog ..Work with what you’ve got =-.
Very well said. This post definitely made my afternoon…
I think I need to show this to my husband–I think he would be man enough to agree with it:)
Happy Mother’s Day!
.-= Jennifer´s last blog ..My Very Own Top Ten: Boobs, Babies, and Birth Control… =-.
What a great post Scary Daddy!
I love that you kept it real but still gave props to the mom.
Happy Mothers Day Jill!
.-= Missy´s last blog ..Thursday Thanks Tank #31 =-.
My husband often has the “grow a pair” attitude. Not me. Cute post and right on.
.-= Jana @ Attitude Adjustment´s last blog ..Then and Now =-.
Scary Daddy is also a Very Smart Daddy! He should start a blog!
.-= rima´s last blog ..The Ritual =-.
This is a great blog! Thank you for sharing :) It’s funny, because my husband will wipe poopy butts (while complaining), but if there is a job that requires putting some kind of lotion or balm on my son’s nether regions, he instantly looks to me to do it. But I don’t mind, because he cooks, cleans, and is a damn good mechanic and handy man. What’s important is that couples compliment each other, and your post illustrates that it is possible!
Have a great weekend :)
Greta
http://www.taketworeviews.com
.-= Greta´s last blog ..Comment on Amazon Gift Card Giveaway by Stacy =-.
And I bet THIS is her best mother’s day present ever.
.-= Jennifer´s last blog ..Home again, home again =-.
I still get weird when I get poop on my hand or finger….but I don’t think I could swear off changing diapers!
Happy Mother’s Day!
.-= Erin´s last blog ..You just haven’t had it cooked properly =-.
Hee hee! Ten points, Scary Daddy!
.-= Nan´s last blog ..The Nostril Picture and Other Highlights =-.
Sounds like Scary Daddy is angling for a first-class Father’s Day fete … getting his brownie points in early! =>
(And even worse than poop on the fingers?? Under the fingernails. Oh, yeah.)
.-= Stacia´s last blog ..Haiku Friday =-.
Happy Mother’s Day to you, too!
Along the lines of a travel survival bag, my husband always wants to burn through the whole bag in about 3 minutes, and I keep telling him that stuff has to last the whole trip. Let them completely tire of something before we pull out something new!
.-= liz´s last blog ..Veggie Garden 2.0: Update 5.8.10 =-.
Mommies need appreciative Daddys like you!
.-= Lynn from For Love or Funny´s last blog ..Proof that birds like Dancing with the Stars… =-.
Very cool for Daddy to give props to Mommy. Love it! Happy Mommy’s Day everyone!!!!
.-= Teri´s last blog ..Just Checkin’ In =-.
Totally enlightening.
So. The reason my husband is so calm on road trips is the Valium? I never knew.
And, that poop on the fingers thing is so spot on.
Thanks for sharing your wonderful wife with us, Jeff!
.-= angie´s last blog ..My Mother =-.
I think it’s probably just this Daddy. :)
These are universal truths… all new and pre-baby parents should have a copy of this list.
(Very nice to give Scary Mommy a bloggy day off for Mother’s Day.)
.-= Tara R.´s last blog ..My sunset sky =-.
Great post, even hubby laughed. Have a good mothers day / birthday
Happy Mother’s Day, Scary Mommy!
.-= Unknown Mami´s last blog ..Fragmented Fridays =-.
The scary thing is…all of these are almost reversed in my house. Daddy is the brave one! I’m the unprepared chicken!
.-= Lindsay @ Just My Blog´s last blog ..Buddy Update…Finally =-.
LOL-great to see hubby’s point of view and obvious love.
Happy Mother’s Day to Jill and Happy Birthday to you.
God help me if I ever have kids because I identify more with Scary Daddy, especially the puking one. I remember one time my nephew had a booger on his face while my sister and I were going somewhere. Neither one of us could look at him long enough to clean it off. She was gagging. I was gagging. Finally I had to grab a Kleenex, reach my hand back without looking, and wipe it off. I also nearly puke every time my dogs puke. I use the same pick it up without looking method to clean it up. I’m pretty much hopeless. I guess you could call me Scary Aunty.
Dear Scary Daddy,
My husband called to say “Thanks dude for making him look really really bad.”
LOL. Nicely done. The post I mean. :-)
.-= subWOW´s last blog ..WTF Wednesday: A great week to be a misanthrope =-.
This was hilarious. Totally loved it.
.-= Jen´s last blog ..The Things They Remember =-.
OMG! I literally LOL for a LONG time at #1. That is my BSD! If he has to pick up dog poop he gags. And I think…”grow a pair!”
Scary Daddy needs his own scheduled time slot on your blog. :)
.-= Kim´s last blog ..Slide Show Sunday: Mother’s Day =-.
I find myself coming to your blog more and more often to the point where my visits are almost daily now!