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Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy

What started as an innocent on-line baby book to chronicle Jill's stay-at-home days with her children, (Lily, Ben, and Evan) quickly transformed into a vibrant community of parents, brought together by a common theme: Parenting doesn’t have to be perfect. Learn more here.

@scarymommy

NYT bestselling author of Confessions of a Scary Mommy and Motherhood Comes Naturally (And Other Vicious Lies). Fond of curse words, sarcasm and Diet Coke.

@francesfrost Fun!! Hope to see you soon! @amberdusick @gburgbookfest - 3 hours ago

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+Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy

Latest posts by Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy (see all)

The Disney Reveal - May 14, 2013
Met My Match At Disney… - May 13, 2013
Sunday’s Baltimore Sun - May 11, 2013

Here’s to mothers who bravely waited until the bus rounded the corner to burst into tears.

Here’s to mothers who have bandaged imaginary boo-boos and applied ice packs for tummy aches.

Here’s to mothers who have fished poop out of bathtubs, pellet by pellet, without so much as gagging.

Here’s to mothers who have slept in twin beds or on hardwood floors, just to be within an arm’s reach of their needy child.

Here’s to mothers who have been away for days, missing their children so badly they could taste it, only to arrive home completely unnoticed.

Here’s to mothers who wonder if the teenage babysitter is a better mother than they are.

Here’s to mothers who have given up their un-licked ice cream cone, because their child’s fell flat on the sidewalk.

Here’s to mothers who let their children dress themselves and hope with all their might that the rest of the world is aware of that fact.

Here’s to mothers who bite their tongues instead of saying “I told you so” when their children so deserve it.

Here’s to mothers who would gladly take the broken arm or stomach bug or broken heart if it could spare their child the pain.

Here’s to mothers who find their expensive hair products poured down the drain and their brushes filled with plastic doll hair.

Here’s to mothers who wear evidence of their children, not only under their clothing, but on it as well.

Here’s to mothers who are ecstatic to find a worm or spot a garbage truck in action, even though they find both disgusting.

Here’s to mothers who want to both fast forward and rewind time all in the span of ten minutes.

Here’s to mothers who never feel completely at peace unless all of their children are under their own roof.

Here’s to stretch marks and saggy boobs and c-section scars.

Here’s to overflowing laundry baskets, toothpaste-covered bathroom sinks and plastic toy littered front lawns.

Here’s to still suffering from baby fever even when your own children are driving you insane.

Here’s to our own mothers, who made us the women we are today.

Here’s to our daughters, who we can’t help but hope will become mothers themselves.

Here’s to mothers who have suffered our greatest fear and live in a world without their child.

Here’s to all of us.

Wishing you all a day filled with love.

Around the web

{ 79 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Kimberly May 13, 2012 at 9:29 am

Such an amazing, all-encompassing list of the truths of motherhood…Thank you, Jill…this post IS my Mother’s Day card… xoxo
Kimberly recently posted..Square Foot Gardening: Building the grid

2 Anne Kimball May 13, 2012 at 9:32 am

And here’s to Jill, who makes the scary profession of motherhood and makes it not so scary after all, as long as we have our “sisters” to help us through it.
Happy Mother’s Day!
Anne Kimball recently posted..The ABCs of Motherhood

3 Sue May 13, 2012 at 9:32 am

I love the fast-forward and rewind time point… so guilty of that!
Sue recently posted..Motherhood: Between The Suns

4 Kim May 13, 2012 at 9:37 am

This was perfect. Happy Mother’s Day, Scary Mommy!!!

5 AmberB May 13, 2012 at 9:49 am

Absolutely captured the essence of motherhood – tears streaming down my face! Happy Mother’s Day all you Scary Mommies!!!

6 Carpool Goddess May 13, 2012 at 9:58 am

Beautiful list, Scary Mommy! Happy Mother’s Day to all!

7 dtt May 13, 2012 at 10:00 am

Happy Mother’s day. No one can say it better than Jill. Thank you!! I hope we all get atleast five minutes of peace and quiet and a whole day filled with love.

8 LDiggitty May 13, 2012 at 10:03 am

I just found out I’m pregnant (with my first) last weekend! I’m so excited, but now I find myself questioning if I’ll be able to give my ice cream cone up for my child… hm… ;)

Happy Mother’s Day to you and yours!
LDiggitty recently posted..my mother, the liar

9 Karen May 13, 2012 at 10:08 am

Couldn’t agree more. Perfectly said.
Karen recently posted..The Women Who Showed Me How to Mother

10 KraftyKwai May 13, 2012 at 10:20 am

Thank you the post. This is exactly what I needed this morning. It just doesn’t really feel like Mother’s day here. This list allowed me to see that today truly is Mother’s Day even if there is no big party for me. This is my second and we are in middle of unpacking house. Next year I will have two children to celebrate for. Happy Mothers Day to you all. I hope you have a wonderful day.

11 Mod Mom Beyond IndieDom May 13, 2012 at 10:22 am

Happy Scary Mommy Day! I hope you’re being pampered – fed peeled grapes, fanned, handed a tropical cocktail, having your nails done and doing absofreakingluyely NOTHING! Enjoy!
Mod Mom Beyond IndieDom recently posted..Mother Smucker’s Udderly Delicious Chocolate Martini

12 Jennifer May 13, 2012 at 10:35 am

Happy Mother’s day Jill!
Jennifer recently posted..Project 365, Week 19

13 Lollie ~ The Fortuitous Housewife May 13, 2012 at 10:41 am

…wonder if the teenage babysitter is a better mother — no question there, both my boys called their babysitter “mama”

…given up their un-licked ice cream cone — nah, but if they’re REALLY cute & sweet and give me lots of hugs & kisses I might share

…wear evidence of their children, not only under their clothing, but on it as well — one of my favorite (and unexpected) benefits of having children is finally being able to blame all the spots on my clothes on someone else, instead of on my clutziness and poor laundering

…never feel completely at peace unless all of their children are under their own roof. — and only once they’re both asleep

Thanks for the wonderful Mother’s Day card, Jill! Hope you have a FAB day with your clan of cuteness.
Lollie ~ The Fortuitous Housewife recently posted..Our day is here – Live it Up!

14 Tanya Doyle May 13, 2012 at 10:51 am

My fave: Here’s to mothers who have slept in twin beds or hardwood floors, just to be within an arm’s reach of their needy child.

And by “slept”, I know you meant “stayed awake”.

Happy Mother’s Day!

15 Wendy May 13, 2012 at 10:52 am

That was so perfect, it made me cry. Happy Mother’s Day to all the Moms out there.

16 Alison@Mama Wants This May 13, 2012 at 10:59 am

Perfect. Happy Mother’s Day to you, Jill.
Alison@Mama Wants This recently posted..The Race

17 Stacey May 13, 2012 at 11:02 am

What a wonderful list! Happy Mother’s Day to you! May it be filled with lots of joy and laughter!
Stacey recently posted..Mother’s Day

18 Elizabeth@Table for Five May 13, 2012 at 11:08 am

Perfect! Happy Mother’s Day!

19 amory/irish twins momma May 13, 2012 at 11:15 am

Best Mother’s Day post ever! Thanks for the smiles and tears while reading!

Hope you have a great day!!!
amory/irish twins momma recently posted..To my girls

20 Chacoy May 13, 2012 at 12:30 pm

Absolutely perfect! Happy Mother’s Day!!
Chacoy recently posted..Winners!!

21 Just Jennifer May 13, 2012 at 1:16 pm

This whole thing was awesome, but the last one, about living lin a world without their child? Gawd.

Love you, Jill, and hope you’re having a fabulous day!
Just Jennifer recently posted..My Week via Instagram

22 Stephanie May 13, 2012 at 1:22 pm

Happy, Happy Mother’s Day to you!! Have a wonderful, amazing, fabulous day!!
Stephanie recently posted..Debbie Downer Does Mother’s Day: A Guest Post by April Nolen

23 Jes May 13, 2012 at 1:46 pm

Babysitters are always better with my kids than I am. I realized though that I do pay them to like my kids, so that made me feel better.
Jes recently posted..Letter to My Younger Self

24 Natalie May 13, 2012 at 2:03 pm

This is pretty much the best Mother’s Day post ever..

25 Ella May 13, 2012 at 2:29 pm

A wonderful list, this made me laugh, cry and go “oh god that’s meeee!” thank you for being so eloquent x

26 Kim at Let Me Start By Saying May 13, 2012 at 2:54 pm

And to those of you who remind us we’re all in this together.
Happy Mother’s Day, Jill!

27 Kristen Mae May 13, 2012 at 3:03 pm

Way to make everyone cry! Beautiful!
Kristen Mae recently posted..Ode to an ‘Ordinary’ Mother

28 a Book for My Daughter May 13, 2012 at 3:43 pm

Thank you for this list—it made me smile. I’ve been running around all weekend (it was my daughter’s dance recital, and she was in THREE separate shows), and I’m exhausted. Remembering that I’ve done just about everything on this list makes me realize that it’s ok to sit in my pj’s all day and do absolutely NOTHING. So I will. I’m going to call my husband and tell him to bring home takeout.
a Book for My Daughter recently posted..A Dream Realized: Opening Our Own Store

29 Kathy V. May 13, 2012 at 5:14 pm

Awesome. Made me cry, and I’m a tough sell (that’s not actually true, I’m a big softie, but I want to seem tough. Grr.) On thing that I would add, “Here’s to the mothers who never held their children, except in their hearts.” Mother’s Day after miscarriage is awful.
Kathy V. recently posted..Insert Inappropriate Nazi Joke Here

30 cheesehead4ever May 13, 2012 at 10:45 pm: Excellent point! Two daughters I have held in my arms and two babies I haven’t held who are in heaven. My prayers are with you!

Reply

31 Cassie May 13, 2012 at 5:30 pm

Happy Mother’s Day to you too, Jill! Being a mom is the best/hardest job there is, and it is nice to know that there are others out there getting through the day just as we are.
Cassie recently posted..Mom Enough!

32 Kelly May 13, 2012 at 7:57 pm

Love it! Now I’m embarrassed to share my Mother’s Day post :)

33 realtormom May 13, 2012 at 8:32 pm

Beautiful… And also happy mothers day to all those who may not have grown a child in their own womb, but made sure their hearts always had room.

34 MommyTime May 13, 2012 at 8:34 pm

I love this. Thank you. And happy Mother’s Day!
MommyTime recently posted..Educating Gracefully: A Minor Rant on Obligation

35 Gigi May 13, 2012 at 8:36 pm

Absolutely BEAUTIFUL post! Happy Mother’s Day to you and all your readers.
Gigi recently posted..Apparently, I’m easily amused.

36 Mod Mom Beyond IndieDom May 13, 2012 at 9:05 pm

That was a beautiful post. Happy Mother’s Day!
Mod Mom Beyond IndieDom recently posted..My Favorite Mother’s Day

37 Candyapple May 13, 2012 at 10:04 pm

Scarymommy, thank you for everything you do today, and the other 364 mother’s days of the year. I am sooooo grateful for your ordinary bravery. I am even more so when you point out every mothers nightmere- so often that is unspoken and therefore overlooked to make others comfortable. Maybe some of you readers don’t get this point, I am both sorry and grateful you don’t…. It takes a village to raise a child but it takes a child to give us all a common purpose. With love, Happy Mothers Day to ALL mommies.

38 Kristin May 13, 2012 at 10:54 pm

Fabulous list – and I hope you enjoyed a well-deserved Mother’s Day – at home, with your family.
Kristin recently posted..The Great Mother’s Day Irony: Parking in Pink and Blue

39 Pernilla May 13, 2012 at 11:00 pm

That was really beautiful. And I am a picky bitch ;)

40 HeeWho May 13, 2012 at 11:00 pm

That post went everywhere I wanted it to go but didn’t know. Fab. Happy Mother’s Day.

41 Nicole May 13, 2012 at 11:23 pm

Thank you so much for this! Live you Jill!

42 Natalie May 14, 2012 at 1:24 am

I’m so glad I found this website Jill! Thank you so much for giving me just what I needed to hear today. Happy Mother’s Day!

43 cindafuckingrella May 14, 2012 at 2:29 am

GREAT post, Jill – I loved it!
cindafuckingrella recently posted..Cinda @ Oprah

44 Shirley@motivatedmommyoftwo May 14, 2012 at 2:30 am

Great post like always, hope you had a wonderful Mother’s Day
Shirley@motivatedmommyoftwo recently posted..{Goals} 10 Weekly Goals

45 Hazel May 14, 2012 at 2:54 am

There is absolutely nothing a mother won’t do for her kid. I am so blessed to have received the gift of motherhood last year. And even my baby (6 months old) still can’t greet me or make me a card, I am the happiest mother ever.
Hazel recently posted..Wisdom From The Goddess Mom

46 TheHeadacheslayer May 14, 2012 at 3:13 am

*Sniffle* Absolutely beautiful!!

In one year, my daughter will be weeks away from graduation. Her dream college is NOT near home. I am dreading it with every ounce of my soul, and finding that I am clutching her harder when she lets me hug her.

Thankfully my son is 10 and a cuddler….

Happy Mother’s Day Jill!!
TheHeadacheslayer recently posted..Shameless P(L)UG: Help me adopt a pug (or two!)

47 Sharon May 14, 2012 at 5:55 am

I am a big sister to two brothers, a mother to five adult children, a grandmother to seven grandchildren and a great-grandmother to one beautiful little boy. I am so much older than my brother’s I was helping with all those things with them. And it such kept going from there. Since my gggrandson lives with us we are going through it all again. But I got a beautiful hug from him today and it was the best thing I got. So as I read the message I thought about all these babies in my life plus two others that I never got to hold. I loved it as I do reading what all you young mothers write, it makes me laugh outloud and believe me I need this. So thank you Jill and all you other girls for giving me such happiness in the wee hours of the morning when it is finally quiet in my house.

48 Anabel Marya May 14, 2012 at 6:13 am

This is so amazing. Scary mommy you are the best. I will have to borrow some nice quotes here so that I can use them. My mum will be so impressed. Thanks a lot for sharing.
Anabel Marya recently posted..Max workouts book

49 Russell Blaine May 14, 2012 at 6:22 am

Here’s the mothers who is the best friend of their child’s in this world. There is no alternative of mother and no one like mother in this world. Happy mothers day.
Russell Blaine recently posted..Efficient Market Hypothesis

50 Heather May 14, 2012 at 8:51 am

Well said. Here’s to us all! =)

51 Stylisticallystella May 14, 2012 at 12:19 pm

Cheers! And here’s the children, who make this whole damn endeavor worthwhile. And personally, here’s to my husband who, on Mother’s Day 4 years ago understood how childless I felt after a second miscarriage and cheered me up, and in the process gave me the most beautiful gift – the conception of our daughter!

52 Johanna May 14, 2012 at 1:31 pm

Cheers to all of those things and the complicated, wonderful, passionate ride that is motherhood!
Johanna recently posted..Faces of Joy

53 Samantha May 14, 2012 at 7:46 pm

I just wanted to let you know that your post on mothers was beautiful and heartfelt and I loved it. I hope to one day be able to write like that, it is exactly how I feel and I have gone through pretty much everything you have said.

Loves it :)

54 Guerrilla Mom May 14, 2012 at 9:27 pm

I guess I needed to cry. Either that, or this is totally beautiful. Thanks.
Guerrilla Mom recently posted..Yelp is for a#@holes.

55 Nicole May 15, 2012 at 4:05 am

Love, love, love! Just what I needed to make it thru this preemie birth!

56 Karen@Hollywood Farm May 15, 2012 at 10:23 am

How about the mom who has to give up her homemade gift made by 8 YO and whose choosing to gift YOUR mom with YOUR handmade mother’s day gift? How about the mom who has had principal meetings re: her 6 YO whose devising a plan to concoct an explosive lotion that will bring me to my demise?
How about the mother whose…….going to the spa right now!

Is it summer break yet?. Because I may get a job just to get away from these guys!
Karen@Hollywood Farm recently posted..Ruby Sparks Coming This Summer 2012

57 Terri S Crum May 15, 2012 at 2:13 pm

this is great…I think you touched on every angle of motherhood! thanks!

58 aimee @ smilingmama May 15, 2012 at 2:47 pm

Love, love, love this!!

59 Meredith May 15, 2012 at 2:59 pm

Wow. That was really beautiful. Thank you.
Meredith recently posted..I broke myself.

60 Shannon May 15, 2012 at 4:22 pm

That was spot on! I laughed, I cried, I nodded at my laptop in complete agreement. You put to words what we all feel!
Shannon recently posted..You Too Have a Live-In Chef!

61 Motherhood on the Rocks May 15, 2012 at 9:24 pm

Here, here! I drink to that!
Motherhood on the Rocks recently posted..SUMMER BEAUTY TRENDS

62 Kristine May 16, 2012 at 8:22 am

What an amazingly succinct summary of all the feelings/emotions that rush through our brains almost constantly. Kudos!

63 Jaymie Shook May 16, 2012 at 9:37 am

Great list! Quite a few of them have already applied to me, and I’ve only been a mom for 13 months! I’ll definitely be looking for your book for my Nook :)
Jaymie Shook recently posted..25 Things I Love About My Mom

64 Jessica May 16, 2012 at 6:00 pm

Oh this is perfect Jill. And I MAY have just told my husband I want one more (even though it’s not happening) over the sounds of the massive meltdowns of the witching hour. It takes a dose of Crazy to do this job. Hope you had an amazing Mother’s Day.
Jessica recently posted..Running Ahead

65 care May 16, 2012 at 7:46 pm

that made me happy/sad cry. love it xo

66 Corey Feldman May 16, 2012 at 9:26 pm

Mother’s day is hard for me because I miss my mom who passed 3 years ago. But I try and make is special for my wife. Happy belated Mother’s Day to you.

67 Michelle Ristuccia May 16, 2012 at 10:20 pm

Sniff! This made me tear up

68 Mama Bird May 17, 2012 at 8:38 am

“Here’s to our own mothers, who made us the women we are today.” True words that put a lump in my throat. A bad mother made us who we are today too. We fight to not repeat her example.

I actually called her to say Happy Mother’s Day. She did carry me after all even though she dropped the ball on everything else.

The other examples above give me a little boost of confidence that I am doing all right. It was badly needed, so thank you.
Mama Bird recently posted..Travel With Twins and European Mama Bear

69 Jessica Starc May 17, 2012 at 10:37 am

This is so wonderfully compiled. I loved it.

Thanks for sharing.

-Jessica
Jessica Starc recently posted..360hdmi

70 Denise Malloy May 18, 2012 at 12:45 pm

As usually, you summed it up beautifully! All so very true!
Denise Malloy recently posted..Joy in Mudville

71 Kerrie McLoughlin May 18, 2012 at 4:24 pm

Amazing. Thanks for this! Happy Mother’s Day!
Kerrie McLoughlin recently posted..Real World: Wyoming; Day Ten

72 The Mommy Psychologist May 20, 2012 at 11:48 am

Raising my glass to this! Here. Here.
The Mommy Psychologist recently posted..Can You Guess Which “Autism Expert” Is Posing For Playboy?

73 Pandy May 21, 2012 at 12:44 pm

Truer words were never spoken. Thanks.

74 Paula @ Simply Sandwich May 21, 2012 at 8:05 pm

I showed up a little late for this beautiful and spot on Mother’s Day post. Hope YOU had a wonderful day! :)
Paula @ Simply Sandwich recently posted..His Last Gift

75 Pam May 22, 2012 at 1:14 am

I know I’m late to the party, but thanks for that! It made me giggle and it made me tear up. Love your blog!!
Pam recently posted..Is there a baby in your belly?

76 Sean Bianca May 22, 2012 at 12:49 pm

I wish I could have been a mother but at 44 it looks bleak. Your Blog does tell me there is an upside to never having had children. I do feel blessed that I have not had to fish poop out of a bathtub. Then again I have fished my dog’s poop out of a sink.
Great blog!
Sean Bianca recently posted..MEN WITHOUT SCHOLARSHIPS!

77 Dani @ Me and My "new" Life June 8, 2012 at 12:17 am