Home Haircuts

Getting Ben’s hair cut is a nightmare. A snot filled scream fest that can only be summed up in one word: Hell. The last time I took him to a salon, the stylist ended up simply buzzing his hair off, convinced that he was bound to lose an ear if she continued with the scissors. Immediately upon leaving the Great Clips and the scowls of the customers in the waiting area, I stopped at Target to pick up a buzzer for the next trim. How hard could it be to buzz three year old’s hair? And I could save twenty bucks a cut? It was a no brainer. At least if he was going to carry on like that, he could do it in the comfort of our own home, without the glares and eye rolls of strangers.

I whipped out the kit once we got home, marking the blades so I’d know which to use when it came time for our first cut. Not a big fan of the whole army look, I was careful to mark the razors with the closest cut with a big red “X,” meaning I was not to use those attachments. Weeks went by and the kit sat in the bathroom closet. Last week, I took it out, ready to preform my first at home cut. I ignored the nagging memory of bald Barbie dolls and grabbed the razor that would give the most conservative buzz. Ben was sobing on the counter, draped in a dishtowel with tears streaming down his face. I took a deep breath and began buzzing. And off came Ben’s hair. A lot of Ben’s hair. So much hair that I could see his scalp. Clearly. As I hit the off switch, I realized my mistake. Rather than grabbing the green check (duh) I grabbed the red X. The red X that reminded me not to use that attachment. Duh. At that point, I had no choice but to even things out and finish the job. So I did.

The good news is that Ben carries off the army look pretty well. And his hair will grow, thank goodness. The bad news? I can’t blame a stylist or my husband. This one was all me.

The X’d attachments are now housed in a shoe box in the back of the closet. I’m not making this mistake again. In fact, Great Clips is looking pretty damn good right now.