Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy
@scarymommy
Latest posts by Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy (see all)
- The Disney Reveal - May 14, 2013
- Met My Match At Disney… - May 13, 2013
- Sunday’s Baltimore Sun - May 11, 2013
Abby Heugel is a professional writer/editor and aspiring hermit in Michigan who is waiting to be discovered as either a brilliant writer, Broadway star or professional asparagus eater. She can’t sing very well, so she’s hoping the other two pan out. You can read more of her work at www.abbyhasissues.com.
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Here’s the thing.
I am not a mom and I will never be a mom, as my instinct to nurture things is pretty much limited to my garden three months out of the year, at which point in time I’m ready to rip the sucker out of the ground and give it a rest for nine months.
People have told me this isn’t an option with offspring. That kind of cements my decision.
But much like my grandma telling people that I’m a spinster with no hips and no ass, it’s inevitable that at 30 years old, my friends are surrounding me with everything “baby.”
I can honestly say that I don’t mind the occasional update and picture. A baby might not be as cute as a puppy, but the little buggers can occasionally do things that warrant parental bragging and posting.
The problem arises when my friends—wearing their baby blinders—mistake my polite interest as an invitation to indulge me with stories of possible allergies and prolific artistic talents with macaroni and glue on a daily basis.
So in the interest of keeping me itchy trigger finger off the “unfriend” button, I thought I would give them a few tips about how to keep the anti-mommies from becoming anti-friends.
There are certain words that are acceptable and “normal” when bandied about with other parents, but that non-parents don’t need to hear. These include but are not limited to: kidlet, breast pump, nipple, baby bump or placenta. And for the record, any mention of placenta consumption is an automatic blocking for life.
Pictures are fine in moderation, which I understand is a relative term. However, just think about how many pictures you would like to me send you of either my fake indoor tree or my mom’s dog and use that as a baseline. And as for ultrasound photos, just don’t. While it’s a miracle and lovely for you, to those of us who aren’t carrying that little lima bean inside our uterus, it looks like an alien. They all do.
Finally, know that when I say I don’t want to have children, I really mean I don’t want to have children. Do not look at me as if I just declared I don’t want to ever have fun or time to myself again, as for me, having children would amount to never having fun or time to myself again. To put it in parental terms, I would be in a permanent “time out.”
Please know that I am genuinely happy for you and wish you nothing but the best. But if you send me a mouse pad with a picture of your child dressed up like a mini-you or start tweeting about nipple seepage, all bets are off.
Now if you’ll excuse me, my fake tree needs water.
{ 114 comments… read them below or add one }
Personally, Abby, I’m with you, and I AM a parent! When I gave birth, I didn’t want to examine my placenta, much less consume it. When I was breastfeeding, I didn’t want to even think the word nipple, as they kind of ruled my life. I wasn’t coordinated enough to effectively use a breast pump, and I looked like I had a perpetual baby bump well after Kindergarten, err… delivery.
Oops! Just realized I mentioned all your banned words. Guess if we were FB friends, you’d be hitting that unfriend button like a judge on America’s Got Talent hits that X.
Very well done, Abby. I’ll be sharing this one…
I hope I didn’t come off as rude, as sarcasm is my second language, but there are just some things we don’t need to know–repeatedly. ;)
Abby recently posted..Abby’s Ark
I feel about dogs the same way you feel about children, and yet people act like I just shot them in the foot when I tell them I don’t like pooches and will never ever own one, not even if hell freezes over.
Oh and, nipple, breast pump, baby bump and PLACENTA!! teehee… ;-)
BonnyBard recently posted..Monday Listicles – Home sweet home
I’m more of an animal person, but I get that other people aren’t and don’t talk about it all the time–especially not a progress report on their bowel movements ;)
Abby recently posted..Abby’s Ark
Great post. I am always amazed by how many people are so self centered and talk about topics of interest to themself, that interest NO ONE else!! I am a soon to be mom, but I can’t stand talking to other women who can only talk about their kids. I REALLY DON’T CARE THAT YOUR SON EATS VEGGIES AND SPICY FOOD AND LIKES THIS AND HATES THAT AND BLAH BLAH BLAH. Seriously. And the bombardment of baby pics on facebook? NOT COOL. I am in the same boat as you when I say I don’t understand and really dislike the fact that parents think the ENTIRE world is concerned about what their kid is doing and looks like.
I think there’s a fine line between general sharing/conversation and details on how your uterus is dilated or 500 pictures of little Johnny running around in a diaper. While I realize parents are excited, it’s not like they’re the first to ever have a child.
Moderation in certain circles people, moderation…
Abby recently posted..Abby’s Ark
Haha my son’s name is Johnny, and while I am so not comfortable talking about the birth process (unless someone specifically asks for details), or how I choose to feed him. I am totally guilty of posting pictures; both ultrasound (in my defense it was for my mom to see since she refuses to let me e-mail her photos), and otherwise. I do try to be conscientious of the fact that no one is excited about my newborn as I am, so I try to keep the picture posting to a minimum…. I do like this post because I swore I never wanted to be ‘that’ mom, so these are all good reminders. Also another pet peeve I’d like to add to the list, is when people tell me to vote for their child in “such and such” baby contest, because they are sure to win…. UGH no, they’re not. Stop it.
Of course! I don’t think posting pictures is self-centered at all, as it’s your kid and you have every right to be proud and share what you want. But I also think that like anything else–especially if it’s in a professional setting–there’s a certain amount of discretion with certain things. That doesn’t just apply to parents with kids!
Abby recently posted..Abby’s Ark
I am always having to pull myself up when I talk to my best friend about my children as she is childless…but I am a stay home mum and my life is consumed by what I do as a parent. It is my job and there is not a lot more I have to talk about…just like any other person with a full time job. I too get annoyed with my self talking about my kids but apart from that all have to talk about is whats on tv and my relationship and I’m pretty sure my friends dont wanna hear about that either…but thats my life and I assume you when your baby arrives it will be yours too… good luck with your little one :-)
Even though I have kids, there are things I’m uncomfortable talking about. And now that they are old enough to talk and ask questions, I think they realize this and do it out of spite. You can try using with your friends the tactic that I use with my nine-year-old son when he begins to tell me a story: I cut him off and say, “Is this appropriate?”
Karen recently posted..The Saga of a Sleepless Son
I’m not exactly uncomfortable talking about certain things–I’m pretty much an open book–but it’s more of the “why are you telling me this again when you know I have no interest” type thing. However, with certain people in certain settings, I really need to implement the “Is this appropriate?” phrase. Good call.
Abby recently posted..Abby’s Ark
To me, Christmas is about the only time I will gladly accept pictures of the kids. Any other time of the year in unacceptable.
And they have to be those postcard pictures. Because no one expects us to keep postcard pictures that say “Happy Holidays from the Smith Family!” out all year long.
Tanya Doyle recently posted..I Count Stairs
And then there’s that twinge of holiday guilt in throwing away their picture, but yet…you don’t want to keep it around.
Abby recently posted..Abby’s Ark
I think there should be a limit on “all about me” posts on FB regardless if they feature pictures of your kids, your dog, your new house, etc. I have a friend who is flirting with being unfriended because of her 8+ daily updates of where she is, what she’s eating, and yes, what cute thing her kid just did. I am a Mom however unless your kid just:
a) had a birthday
b) lost a tooth
c) saved your family from a fiery death
then we probably don’t need the constant stream of info.
Also? Placenta. There I’m done ;)
Alexis recently posted..Bedtime What Time?
Agreed. I’ve written many times about social media saturation, and it’s not just with parents, that’s for sure. If I can tell you everything you’ve eaten and done in a day, perhaps you should back away from the computer. :)
Abby recently posted..Abby’s Ark
I love that everyone can make whatever decisions are best for them : )
Life with Kaishon recently posted..Babysitting (and some advice for photographers)
Abby! Great post over here at Scary Mommy! You are so kind to indulge my parenting blog with visits and comments. I totally get you. I still feel like I missed “girl school” and some of these things still perplex me, and I have two kids! Of course, my permanent method of communication also = sarcasm, which is why I love reading you so much.
Cindy ~ The Reedster Speaks recently posted..The Land of Tea.
Nice to see you here, Abby. First of all, as a mother, I completely respect your decision/choice/dellusion/intelligence about not wanting to have kids. Yeah, I know, you say that and people look at you like you just bit the ears of a kitten, but you know, there are other ways to live a full and happy life that don’t involve boogers and leaky boobs.
And while I do post kid pics, sometimes I am utterly nauseated by the amount other parents post. I have an acquaintance who has THOUSANDS up. And her kid just turned 5 (there were over 100 pics of that over-the-top pinterest-worthy party). And don’t get me started on doggie-mom pics. Seriously. They all look the same to me. Much like ultrasounds.
But no matter what we like, we can hide/scan anyone or anything we want.
Placenta-eaters are totally blocked from my world as well. TMI.
Kerry Ann (aka Vinobaby) recently posted..Wild Locations: Trifecta and Write On Edge Prompts
Agreed. I am grateful for the “block” option, but unfortunately, that doesn’t exist in “real” life with real-time interactions. And not that it matters, but I enjoy your kid pictures and posts because you’re classy and they make sense. You don’t saturate, you share :)
Abby recently posted..Abby’s Ark
Nipple seepage [actual snort!]. I must admit that I’m three kids in and even I get tired of seeing/hearing all kid related shit. I actually respect you more for understanding yourself enough to realize motherhood isn’t for you rather than thinking a kid will magically change your disposition or save you from hipless, assless, spinsterdom. :o) Newsflash moms who initially felt like Abby: KIDS MAKE YOUR DISPOSITION WORSE. Also, wait, look at this video of my kid farting to Boom Boom Pow.
Arnebya recently posted..Our Home Is
Great post! I can see both sides to this, but it’s important for us moms to remember that the details are not as interesting to anyone else as they are to us. I have one FB friend who literally outlines her life on FB. Honestly, if you were interested in killing her or her family, it would not take much planning. It is easy to find out exactly where each member of her family is at every point of every day. I try to limit FB posts to every few months, and usually have a couple people asking to see new pictures before I post any. Then, I do try to just put up a couple of them.
It’s harder for me when discussing life with co-workers, though. If you want to know how my weekend went, or how my night was, just realize that my kid is the biggest part of my life right now. Most likely, my weekend revolved around her naps and what she ate. It might be sad, but it’s true. And when she was breastfeeding – my life revolved around that. So, I can either give you the short version – “it was good”, or the real version. IE – no sleep, lots of kisses and snuggles, and plenty of milestones reached. I live for the time I have with my daugther, so I am sorry if that is all I have to talk about. Ask me again in 18 years, and I am sure I will some stories that involve things other than her.
I think the oversharing on social media sites as it relates to kids scares me more than anything else, for many of the reasons you mentioned. Not only the privacy issue, but the fact that years from now the kids will know everyone saw them naked or throwing a fit 400 times on Facebook. While I admit I do love Facebook and Twitter and probably annoy people with my posts, I never jeopardize my safety (just my sanity.)
As for conversations with parents, please don’t misunderstand! I totally get and respect that your kids are your life and to be honest, I like hearing about the things that go on. But when it comes to a coworker sharing the same story about a bodily function that happened every day for a week with their kid, that’s where I draw the line. Kids are awesome most of the time. It’s the fact that some parents feel the need to tell me this 100 times a week ;)
I’ll stop writing about my baby when people stop posting photos of their fabulous lives (i.e. baby free trips around the world) and bragging about how many miles they ran this morning.
Guerrilla Mom recently posted..Mom- you’re a big, fat liar.
Agreed. Social media is a haven for oversharing about everything. It’s when it seeps into life offline as well, especially at work, that things start to annoy the crap out of me. If only there was a “block” option for real-time oversharers, eh?
Abby recently posted..Abby’s Ark
I’m kidding around. Sarcasm is my second language. I love living vicariously through my friends. I don’t love the exercise bragging because it makes me feel like a lazy fat ass. Loved your post.
Guerrilla Mom recently posted..Mom- you’re a big, fat liar.
What’s even worse are the parents WITH children who are posting photos of their drunken childless vacations. I’m not jealous I just wonder when the heck they see their kids!
Jessica recently posted..Untitled
Guerilla Mom, you took the words right out of my keyboard.
I can’t brag about an upcoming trip to Hawaii, but I sure as hell can post a funny video of my son playing air guitar.
That’s what friendships are about- reciprocity.
The DETAILS you mention—- yeah, that gets old. And it gets old no matter what the subject matter. I definitely don’t think that oversharing is exclusively a parent thing.
OMG. I love this comment! I’ve also ha enough with the political postings.
“I ran 10 miles and followed it up with a swim at the pool!! What a great morning!!”
Well, I managed to get out of bed and shower before taking the kids to their schools and sitting down to write a boring technology white paper.
Oh, you didn’t want to know that?
EXACTLY.
JD @ Honest Mom recently posted..Just when I thought I was awesome, I wasn’t.
Yes! Do we really need a Christmas letter with every single child-free climbing trip, hike, or bike ride they took in the last 12 months documented in photos. It’s just a matter of politeness to not rub in the faces of those tied to their houses for the rest of eternity (or what feels like that at least):)
Christina Robert recently posted..Extended Breastfeeding: A Stigmatizing Term
I have a Facebook account and use it to keep in touch with family and friends that I can’t visit while keeping my medically complex kiddo away from germs. Consequently, I have a lot of pictures. I also have firm policies about what’s acceptable to post/share… as in, if I wouldn’t want her doctors to see it, it doesn’t make it on the page. Because several of her doctors ARE on my page. This includes anything that has come out of a person… not something I want recorded forever, or to ever have to think about again.
Yes… I do post more pix than my friends at times, I am also 3000 miles from all friends and family. So I use social networking to keep them in the loop because I can’t afford to fly back and forth with my 2 kids and want my 80 yr old grandma, who is on fb, to be able to see her gg-kids, and my and my husband’s parents to see and know what’s going on occasionally. Please know us parents aren’t always that infatuated with our kids (mine are brats 99% of the times these days) but sites like fb are helpful to stay in touch. I kinda feel it’s my friend’s decision, which I fully support, to hide my BS if they don’t want to check it out…not mine to edit. Fun blog to read though.
Exactly. I love social media for the fact that you CAN share photos and info with those far away. That’s not my point. My point was simply that in “real” life, I don’t need to have detailed reports from people I’m not necessarily close to in real life but am forced to interact with on a daily basis.
People seemed to hone in on the Facebook thing ;)
Abby recently posted..Abby’s Ark
Abby, I read my reply and realized this came across waaaay different than I intended! Was something I had been thinking about recently though, about sharing and whether or not I share too much/little, but like I said my situation is a little unique. One thing that drives me NUTS are moms who only post stuff about how much they ‘worship their blessed little angels.’ Give me a break, we all love our own kids, no need to reconfirm it daily to the freaking world. Anyway, I totally got what you were saying here, too, I was on the fence about kids myself but ended up with 2. I think it’s great you know you don’t want kids, imagine all the freedom in your world being painfully ripped away (and don’t give me a bunch of BS about how your world didn’t exist before kids. Mine did, it was full of naked Sunday afternoons with my now-husband, red wine, marathon sessions of Six Feet Under, dinner out, extra money, vacations, and a remarkable lack of tantrums over stupid shit). While I adored the little buttheads, it’s exhausting and certainly not a job for anyone who doesn’t want it. How amazing is it that we live in a time when women can be in control of that decision. And no, that’s not commentary on any inflammatory political issue, I just finished reading a great book on working women in the 60′s (Mad Women) and their choices were highly different. Anyway, thanks again for the fun read and the response :)
Loved every word! Except the forbidden non-mom words of course.
I also love seeing this on a mom blog. Can we just put down all the reasons you are one and I’m not and just be friends?
Omg LAWD!!!! Thank you for this post! I feel the same way as you, and I have one 10 year old. I love him to pieces, but I don’t share EVERYTHING he does on my page. I’ve had people even ask if I had custody of him! Of course I do, I just don’t think I need to share every time he farts, rides his bike, or graduates another grade in school!
I think your baseline nails it “think about how many pictures you would like to me send you of either my fake indoor tree or my mom’s dog and use that as a baseline”.
Ugh, and I get tired of hearing “when are you gonna have another one??!” Are you kidding me?! I’m pretty excited I’ve managed to help another human being get to the age of ten, but I don’t want to add another decade of this shit onto my life!!! I have things to do too!
Love this post!!!
Thanks for the comment, as I didn’t intend to sound like a witch with this post. It’s just turning the tables a wee bit, and obviously it struck a nerve. To each their own!
Abby recently posted..Abby’s Ark
AMEN to that, Jeny! Mine turns 11 tomorrow, and I just recently had some interesting conversations with a friend about 1. I am ME first, and I also happen to have a kid (who I love a lot, but…) 2. I also have other interests and aspirations, and those have value. I too have gotten tired of “are you going to have another one?” Hell no. This one will be out of the house before I turn 50!
I also think about how would I feel if EVERYONE my mother knew had seen pictures of me and heard stories of me at EVERY stage of my growing up, every day. OVERSHARE! He deserves some privacy of his own.
My brother & his wife have an 18-month-old, and even before my SIL left the hospital, my mother has been constantly mentioning “the first delivery is always the hardest”, and “when [not if] they have their next one.” It makes me want to scream, because it is a not-so-thinly veiled criticism of the fact that I have one.
Why is it that mothers who are not absolutely, totally absorbed in their kids are labeled “slacker moms,” but it’s 2 weeks from the end of school, and my husband (his dad) still can’t remember which day of the week is gym day, band day, etc.?? Not a slacker dad, just a dad. Just sayin….
My sonogram photos were WAY pre-Facebook, but I really don’t think I would have wanted to post them. I think they look like an alien too…..
Aimee recently posted..Kenzie & Gennaro – you will be missed…
SO glad to know I’m not alone. And I TOTALLY feel you on being happy OUR parents didn’t have fb!!! Duuuuuuuuuuuude, 11-17 years old, I was an awkward, zitty, linebacker-shaped, tomboy. Who also wore the most AWFUL glasses put on this Earth!!!
I know I’m a great Mom ( like you do), but I don’t feel the need to prove it to all of Facebookland. When I take my son out he’s polite, can hold his own in a conversation with ANYONE, never threw fits in a store, and treats everyone with respect. He’s a great kid! But I’ll be DAMNED if I can remember what day his gym, 4-h, football signup, etc are!!! LOL!!!
I share a couple photos a month of him (if that), and make the occasional post about him (last one was about listening in on him, and his other 10yo friend doing their science homework on Uranus. I mean, come on, THAT’S funny to almost anyone ;)
But, I don’t need to see 57 shots of your kid’s 3rd grade “graduation”. No one does. Or a weekly list of what foods your child is eating.
It’s easy to make friend lists in facebook. You set the privacy to “Family” when you want to overpost your kid stuff. More people should use that feature.
I have to agree with Guerilla Mom. As much as I don’t share much about my child, mainly because I don’t share much about myself in general, people do need to get over themselves. For every mother posting about their child using the potty there is at least one childless person desperately (and unconvincingly) trying to make everyone envy their singledom. I’ve had my fill of pictures of martini glasses and check ins at this restaurant or that. It’s so very easy to unsubscribe from updates without having to unfriend a person that complaining about anything on anyone’s page is just ridiculous and generally an exercise in mean spirited voyeurism.
Agreed. I’ve also (sarcastically) written about people who overshare about things completely unrelated to kids. I don’t actually get upset and unfriend people, as I know it’s my choice to follow people I follow.
This was just a tongue-in-cheek post. Not a declaration of social media perfection or anything.
Abby recently posted..Abby’s Ark
I know many people wear sarcasm as a badge of honor but sarcasm by its very definition is meant to be unkind.Posts like yours have just become so cliched is all. Not sure why women spend so much time tearing down each other albeit under the guise of humor. Don’t know the last time I saw a man dedicate a blog to a topic like this. To each her own I guess.
This post wasn’t written to tear anyone else down at all, and I’ve never claimed to wear sarcasm as a badge of honor. I have depression and OCD and a myriad of other things that I deal with, and humor and a less-than-serious take on things helps me deal with my situation.
As for the “women” thing, I wrote about this a couple of weeks ago http://abbyhasissues.com/2012/04/15/keeping-it-real-2/
and agree that women are harder on each other than they are on anyone else. While I see why you might feel that way about this post, I can promise you it wasn’t an attack or an attempt to be unkind. It was simply a take on a topic.
Abby recently posted..Abby’s Ark
really? Checking in at restaurants is trying to make others envious? DH and I do that all the time. Here I thought we were letting our friends know where they can join us . . .
Wendy (The Local Cook) recently posted..Asparagus Skillet with Egg
It’s so much worse when it’s a family member by marriage! I can’t just delete my husband’s cousin (I’d feel so guilty) but if she only knew how many times I rolled my eyes or sighed when she constantly updates everyone on her children’s sleeping habits I’m pretty sure SHE would delete ME. I didn’t tell you to have your babies less than a year apart! I didn’t even know that was possible! But please please please stop complaining that you’re tired. Nobody cares who slept through the night or who is taking a nap or that you really need some coffee.
Jessica recently posted..Untitled
I dig your honesty and wish more women would make sure they won’t become moms when they don’t want to be a mom. Or that they would not have a baby just because their man or their mother wants them to. I have 5 kids and would have a zillion if I were younger and richer … I always knew I wanted a ton of kids and stayed true to that even though people hate on me for it at times. Why can’t people just let us be who we are? I will now be sending you a picture of me nursing my 2 1/2 year old. Feel free to delete it … :-)
Kerrie McLoughlin recently posted..VACATION REQUEST DENIED … again? (Day 22)
Luckily most of my “friends” on FB are pretty good about limiting their bragging and don’t go on too much…but I’ve purged my friends several times and anyone annoying didn’t make the cut (sorry people, but I can only handle so much Obama-bashing (fan of him or not), terrible jokes and stupid one word updates like “figures” – oh and “FML” – personally hate that one).
Confession: I have twins, they’re 8, they’re my whole universe…but I’m assuming that’s the case with anyone who has offspring so I limit my kid-related to postings to funny stories or funny shit they say. On a side note, I am a mom and I do work full time. I am also a runner and I sometimes go on kid-free trips…so when I post that I ran 3 miles this morning and it was a real ball-buster (and I had to get up at 4:30 am to fit it in)…and that I spent my weekend at the Indy 500 (without my kids), well those things are the things that are good for me as a person vs. me as a mommy. So I try to keep my posts pretty even and not overly frequent.
Carry on Abby, telling it like it is should be a requirement in life.
Thanks so much for this comment. I post updates about my life as well, whether it’s about a workout, my cat or just having a bird fly into my head or something, but not every detail of every little thing.
But as I’ve said above, it’s simply a tongue-in-cheek post and not a selfish rant that my online space is being suffocated or anything. To each their own ;)
Abby recently posted..Abby’s Ark
P.S. I can possibly see this in one of my daughters and you bet your ass I’m not going to push her to be a mother when she wants to be an actress or whatever.
Kerrie McLoughlin recently posted..VACATION REQUEST DENIED … again? (Day 22)
Amen! Dogs are awesome….kinda. They’re like human 2 year olds, forever…but they don’t grow up and back talk like humans. I have 3 humans and one dog. Can’t wait to have a garden of my own to rip up. For now, my hair will have to suffice
One hundred percent with you. If your child just did something funny, by all means share. How ever, I have no desire to hear about your child’s bowel movements, their food preferences, or the number of times they vomited on you. Yes, I do have children, and yes I do love them, but that is not all there is to me, and I get enough of them when I’m home or talking to my mother. I’m more than willing to talk about my children, but there is a limit. I guess I never lost the ability to be my own person, not just a mom. And honestly, I don’t even like to think about my kids bowel movements, let alone talk about them. I’m not sharing my sons annoying habit of digging for China in his nose, so I don’t want to hear about little Johnny’s either.
And thank you for realizing you don’t want kids. Not every person has the desire to have kids for various reasons. Just like no everyone has the desire to shoot up heroin. Sometimes, I really wish I had known myself well enough to make a better decision regarding having children.
“I guess I never lost the ability to be my own person, not just a mom.”
That’s such an insightful statement, and one I sincerely respect. Anything else I say will sound trite, so thank you for that.
Abby recently posted..Abby’s Ark
This is hilarious. You are a great writer. While I may not invite you to babysit my kids (I wouldn’t hire myself either), I could totally be friends with you. Good luck with the asparagus thing.
I actually started babysitting when I was 12 and recently had a small breakdown when I read that one of the kids that I babysat for just had twins. Good lord, I’m old…
Abby recently posted..Abby’s Ark
Excellent post, Abby!
I LOVE that photo of you with your doll. The look of disdain says it all.
I can’t wait to be a Mum one day, but I PROMISE I will not bore you to death with photos, ok? Well, I might send mass emails, just full of adorable photos of my little un’, just to really annoy you, but hey, that’s what friends are for, right?
:-)
iampisspot recently posted..Tick tock.
I’m with you on the oversharing. And overbragging. And overwhining. And the overaffirming. And overloving. And over…well pretty much everything else too.
Rebeccah recently posted..The Difference A Year Has Made
Until you are responsible for another tiny life you can’t fully understand the tidal wave of emotions that come with parenthood. When your newborn sneezes it is literally the MOST AMAZING sneeze you’ve ever witnessed. Every milestone is even more amazing than the last. I know it sounds cheesy but it’s true. A good family friend didn’t have children until almost 40. She told me that one day she called all her girlfriends who became moms earlier in life and apologized for not asking about their children enough. She didn’t realize how life changing it was until she experienced it. She had no idea how much it changes your identity. My son is my world. If you love me, you have to love him too. I get your point, and I try not to talk too much mommy talk around non moms, but it can be hard when your life is being a mom 24/7. I know my true girlfriends love me and my son because they’ll gladly share in my joy that he learned to drink out of a straw! :)
Thank you for such a respectful comment, and although I know I’ll never be a parent, my mom has shown me that there is nothing NOTHING like the love of a parent. I get it, and that’s why I do listen and ask questions to those who have kids. It’s part of them–often the most important part–and I want to be a part of that.
I just draw the line at certain things that happen over and over again by the same people, those I simply can’t avoid by contract and can never take a hint ;)
Abby recently posted..Abby’s Ark
I am a mom, but I’m with you! I think it helps that I have several friends who have remained childless as well. We have conversations outside of kids. Plus, my children are older. I’ve gotten to a point in my life where I feel that it is natural and right to have some “I’m not thinking about the children or talking about the children for the next five minutes” moments. That’s hard to do with an infant!
Sarah recently posted..Weekend Wrap-up: The Half-assed Edition
While I love this piece and totally understand where you are coming from, you’ve got to understand that moms do not have good control over their overwhelming love and pride for their children. And yes, we overshare, whether knowingly so or not. I had never been a very sentimental person before my kids were born. In fact I am one of the most critical and sceptical people on earth, but ever since my little shrimps came out, I haven’t been myself. I post their pictures and annoy the hell out of my childless friends with never ending stories about preschool ratings,nannies, flu season, potty training and all the other child related crap. I am aware of my addiction, guilty as charged. I just wish there was some kind of treatment for it. My kids are now past their breastfeeding, teething, colics and all the other juicy details of the first year of motherhood and my best friend just had a baby. When I hear her bla bla bla , I admit that I would have liked it better if she could just shut up. But I also know that she won’t and that it’s my job to pretend to be interested as much as possible – that’s what she’s been doing for me for over 5 years. And if any of my childless friends want to unfriend me – I swear I will understand.
Just as I said above, thank you so much for the respectful comment. I get that I will never get it, which is why I DO listen and take an interest (to a point) with my friends and family. That’s respectful, that’s basic human nature and I do it because I want to–not because I feel like I have to.
However, as you know, there comes a point when TMI is TMI. I don’t share every detail of my cat’s digestive disruptions–maybe once in awhile–but if it’s important to me or someone else, I will share and I will listen.
Abby recently posted..Abby’s Ark
Thanks for the laugh. Is it horrible that I as a mother found this funny? I just don’t understand sometimes while a lot of mothers feel the need to push their beliefs onto someone else. Crazy! Thanks again!! I LOVED this post!
I’m with you! And I hate it when parents talk about poopy diapers & the like. And I change poopy diapers every day. It’s just not something that needs to be discussed outside the home :)
Jennifer recently posted..GNO: The White Girl’s Overbite, Part I
I have to say that although I don’t change infant diapers, I have changed the diapers of my grandma. I did not announce this on Facebook every time it was done. The end.
Abby recently posted..Abby’s Ark
Moms who overshare every little detail or brag incessantly about their kids make me extremely twitchy, and I AM a mom. In fact, one of the side benefits to a friendship I recently (and gladly) ended is the endless FB statuses about what this woman’s kid says and does and READS (which at age 2-1/2, I must call shenanigans on) that I no longer have to see.
That said, moms get a pass from me on photo sharing – especially on Facebook, where you can choose or not choose to click through any given album. I know I genuinely enjoy sharing pictures of my family on Facebook and find that it’s a way to keep friends and family updated on us since we’re all scattered about the country these days. So, no judgment there. Although I tend to agree about ultrasound pics – I’ve never seen the point. And for God’s sake, do NOT post photos of your child naked if they’re over the age of one!
Kristin @ What She Said recently posted..Friday Tapas: The One Where I Eat Crow
Pictures are most certainly a wonderful thing, and pretty much the point of Facebook. But when they go off the FB timeline and into my inbox repeatedly, that’s where I draw the line.
Abby recently posted..Abby’s Ark
I’m a brand new mommy and love this article. While I do some of the things you mentioned, I have also warned and/or apologized to my non-parent friends. I want to include everyone in my joy, but also respect their decision to “opt out”. It’s important for a woman not to forget that the whole world doesn’t change just because HER whole world changed and I try SO hard to remember that. I actually use my free time to find out whats going on with my friends. I KNOW what is going on here, everyone knows I have a 1 mo old baby. If they want to know how she is doing, they’ll ask. And I make a conscious effort not to answer questions that weren’t asked. Bottom line, I remember being a single non-mom and it’s not easy to relate to something that is so totally foreign. And even when I finally got knocked up I said to myself, “I’m nothing special. Women have been doing this for a million years. I will NOT force people to congratulate me or fake love for my newborn who will undoubtedly be only adorable to me. Being a mom is an amazing experience for me. But living the life you CHOOSE is also an amazing experience. Well written, Abby!
Great Post :) Well worded and not snooty at all :)
I feel the same about pets, and people look at me like I just said I kick puppies… I don’t by the way …. People literly get offended its crazy lol
It took me having a kid, and then having a close friend who had a kid, to really understand what all of the fuss was about. Before having my son, I loved seeing baby pictures, reading updates, talking about all of the things I was sure to endure in the future. Once my son was born, I’m sure I became one of those parents who are .JPG happy and shared too much info. from time to time. But it wasn’t until a close friend had her baby, that I realized not everything is a “miracle” or “share-worthy”. I found myself getting annoyed with every comment, frustrated with every photo. Since then, I am far more aware and thoughtful about what I share. Great post!
Cassie recently posted..Everyone Says "They Come in Threes"
Well, I’m sure everything is a miracle and share-worthy to the parents who are doing the posting, which is somthing that I am mindful of (despite the vibe I apparently gave off here, which wasn’t my intention.)
Abby recently posted..Abby’s Ark
I have to ask, is placenta eating a real thing?????
scarily, yes – http://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2012/03/25/i-regret-eating-my-placenta/
I actually (respectfully) disagree with much of your post. It sounds like you have an aversion to children, rather than just choosing to live a child-free life (but if you don’t want kids, better that you recognize it before you actually have kids!). I guess it’s hard for me to see the flip-side, when I’ve always wanted to be a mom. And the ONLY reason I go on facebook is to see updates and pictures of all of my friends’ kids. If it weren’t for the kid updates, I would most definitely delete my account. Because to me, I can’t stand the narcissism that is present on facebook (all the self portraits, poor me updates, I’m awesome updates, I’m better than you updates, etc.). I also can’t stand the people on facebook who have children, and then post about being at a bar on a Saturday afternoon. I feel like those people who post about their children all the time are the only people who show any sort of selflessness and humbleness. My son is my world, as he should be. And he is a miracle. But I believe everyone else’s baby is a miracle too, and I believe the little miracles should be shared – even if it nauseates you :)
I actually agree with you on a lot that you say, and thank you for being so respectful. Like you, I’m not into the selfish “look at me” aspect of many things on Facebook either. I’m actually quite boring. I like my family, my house, my sports, food and being outside. Updates from other people that don’t relate to me don’t hold my interest, nor is it any of my business what other people post about, as I know that I’m boring to most.
But no, while I realize it came off a bit brash in the post, I don’t really have an aversion to children. It’s more an aversion to the parents that can’t accept the fact that I don’t want my own. Pictures are great, updates are fine, but when it ends up being someone like coworker that interrupts me multiple times in a day with baby bowel updates, it gets to be a bit much ;)
Abby recently posted..Abby’s Ark
Hey, Abby: I hope you understand now that I will sign all of our correspondence with “Miss PlacentEpisiotomy Nipplestein”.
But I promise to never, ever show you the inside of my uterus. Ever.
Awesome post, as always my dear. ;)
Miss PE N
Kim at Let Me Start By Saying recently posted..Stuff You Didn’t Know I Know. Also: Me With a Tank.
Kim, I know more about your ass than I do that of my own mother, so I think we’re past the “weird word” stage.
Abby recently posted..Abby’s Ark
This is a fair and factual point. Just be glad I only share details and not pictures of it with you.
Also? My anus is ADORABLE. Even when on a Time Out.
Kim at Let Me Start By Saying recently posted..Stuff You Didn’t Know I Know. Also: Me With a Tank.
Great post! I love your tongue in cheek style on this one. It’s a never ending commentary on the plight of social media. It doesn’t matter whether it’s kids, dogs, iguanas or sock puppets. Sometimes we all need to remember that less is generally more in the sharing department.
Jen recently posted..Exclamation Points Are Nobody’s Bitch
This fellow non-mommy couldn’t agree with you more! And the word “kidlet” confounds me. Is it like a cross between kid and piglet? Because that’s just rude and insulting to poor Piglet.
Katie @ Chicken Noodle Gravy recently posted..One Potato, Two Potato
I loved this! Very well-said!
I remember feeling the exact same, until my birth control failed me last year.. (:
Great post. I to am childless by choice and seem surrounded with people wanting to blab about their kids. I’m not gonna lie I cant even do a good job pretending to listen. I’m out of my league with kids and parents. But I appreciated your perspective Abby. Good to know I am not alone =)
Abby! So excited to see you on Scary Mommy!
If I see “kidlet, breast pump, nipple, baby bump or placenta” in a status update, I shiver and hide that person. Permanently. And I have two kids.
PS – thanks for being a Write on Edge buddy even though I write about my kids a lot. I love your blog and I’m psyched when you read and comment on mine. You rock.
JD @ Honest Mom recently posted..Just when I thought I was awesome, I wasn’t.
Well, you are an honest mom, and I honestly enjoy your blog, for what it’s worth ;)
Abby recently posted..How To Piss Off Mommy Bloggers
Awwwwww. *sniff*
JD @ Honest Mom recently posted..Just when I thought I was awesome, I wasn’t.
Totally agree. I’m a mom and have NO interest in reading about leaky boobs on personal FB pages (and really WHO does that???!! sheesh). However, I will read about, comment on and post about leakage (others and my own) on the private mom-group that I belong to on FB. Keyword: PRIVATE. So, I get it. I do.
The only thing I ask from non-moms: Don’t make negative comments about ANYTHING related to motherhood ever. Well, OK, you can comment on Octomom, that’s fair…. But really, as a non-mom you have no right to negatively discuss or comment on how long someone decides to nurse, what a child is allowed to eat, what kind of discipline he does or does not receive in public. Nope…shhhh….shut it…zipit zip…it ZIIIIP IT. I know you saw some crazy-ass mom losing her shit in Walmart the other day with her kid… but the truth is,as a non-mom you are not allowed to comment on these things. As a non-mom your opinion holds zero validity. Zero. Because, well, you don’t get it and you never will. Sorry but that is the truth.
Please, just post about your dogs (um, pa-the-tic) and your rampant alcohol consumption (even more pa-the-tic) and/or exercise routine and leave the mom-related comments to the moms in the trenches.
So reading back I wish I could edit. What I meant to articulate in that last paragraph is that us moms (or…at least me) think non-mom posts are just as lame as you think mom-posts are. It’s like ‘Oh look yet another “dog” photo, this time with a red bandanna. Oh look, she’s out drinking, again, just like every other day, what a rich fulfilling life she leads, Oh, pinch me, she ran 5.2 miles today, last week it was 4.8 miles. (EYE-ROLL). Seriously. If you think that moms are not as totally annoyed at non-mom drivel as you are of ours you are mistaken. Yes, we feel a pang of jealousy at your freedom now and then. But mostly we hide your updates and read about what is going on with our friend’s kids.
Well, I’m going to take you to task a little bit with this comment, simply because you’re exhibiting the same prejudice towards non-moms as I’m being accused of towards moms. I never told anyone what to do with their kids, nor would I ever simply because a) I have no clue about having kids b) it’s your own life and c) it’s none of my business and honestly, I don’t really care. Giving advice or making negative comments about how someone raises their kids is something I’ve never, ever done.
But as I’ve said in the comments here, friendship is a give and take, and what many of the “mommy” bloggers that got upset about is apparently the fact that if they keep taking and taking and talking only about their kids, there’s only so much I can take.
To you, your kids are interesting. To those who didn’t give birth to your kids, other things are more interesting. To claim it’s pathetic for people to post about what is interesting to them is cruel and rude, as it implies that only what you like is worthy of attention. To me, that’s much more close-minded and shallow than anything anyone else has mentioned here in the comments. And while I would NEVER tell someone how to raise their kids for all the reasons I mentioned, I do hope that you don’t pass that trait along.
Abby recently posted..How To Piss Off Mommy Bloggers
Thank GOD I’ll never “get it.” Child free and happy
Abby, not only did I enjoy and appreciate your post, I enjoyed many of the follow up comments and discussion. I am a mom, and recently a childless friend of many years stopped talking to me or responding to my messages. I wonder sometimes if it’s because she sees my social media updates as oversharing, or if it’s just that our paths have diverged too much. On the other hand, my best friend from college is never having kids either, and not only is she a wonderfully supportive friend, she sends the best kid gifts somehow! We with kids and without can co-exist and love each other just fine… even when I’m enraptured with my little boy and you’re enraptured with your three-month garden. ;-)
Kristin Shaw recently posted..I Can Wait
I LOVE and adore this response.
Respectful, thoughtful, considerate.
Different people can absolutely coexist in friendship, even if the most important living things in their lives are of different species. They simply need to hear each other without judgement, and be ready to answer genuine questions to help one another understand the other’s circumstances.
It also doesn’t hurt to find the humor wherever possible.
Kim at Let Me Start By Saying recently posted..Stuff You Didn’t Know I Know. Also: Me With a Tank.
Thanks! I just checked out your blog and am reading avidly. :)
Kristin Shaw recently posted..I Can Wait
I agree that that was an awesome comment. I do read some “mommy blogs” like Kim’s, simply because it’s about life and humor and friendship. If kids are part of the deal, great! I have a cat and psycho squirrels in my garden, both of which I will bring up.
It’s a give and take, and what many of the “mommy” bloggers that got upset about is apparently the fact that if they keep taking and taking and talking only about their kids, there’s only so much I can take.
Abby recently posted..How To Piss Off Mommy Bloggers
I think it’s fantastic when people who don’t want kid don’t have them. It’s the people who don’t want them and have them anyway that bum me out. Way to go.
I guess it goes without saying that I am an oversharing mom since I have a “mommy” blog. But I did realize at some point not to share every post on my personal FB page since my kidless friends could probably care less about my daughter counting flowers, and I keep it just to my blog’s FB page for all the other folks who love reading about kids.
Once becoming a mother, it took me awhile to have other interests besides my daughter becauseI just couldn’t get enough of her, and I was on an endorphin high. The best way I can describe the feeling of becoming a mother to me is falling love. Abby, if you have ever fallen in love, you may have talked too much about it and wanted to be with that person every waking (and sleeping) second. That’s how it was and mostly still is for me with my daughter. I am absolutely in love with her, and I am not ashamed to let the whole world know about it. =)
Rebekah @ The Golden Gleam recently posted..{We Get It} Jealousy
This is an awesome comment and an awesome comparison, as there are many things I’m passionate about that I know I overshare and annoy people with. I think the difference is that I know when to draw the line, just as it sounds like you do.
Blogs and Facebook pages are totally for whatever you want. But when it seeps into the everyday interactions and it’s forced on you in other situations, it gets a wee bit old…just as someone talking about how wonderful their new boyfriend/girlfriend is every second. I respect that they are, but please respect that I’m not also in love with them ;)
Abby recently posted..How To Piss Off Mommy Bloggers
Holy shit, I think I’m annoying! But my annoying FB posts about my kids are really for the benefit of my close family members who actually *do* give a shit! I know that people who don’t care to see just cruise on by… and I am considerate enough to put photos in albums once every few months, so they’re not constantly popping up. And as for nipple-poop-burp-drool talk, I think it’s HILARIOUS, but I do have boundaries; I only talk about the really embarrassing stuff in the blog-site.
But I did post a video on FB called ‘live-givers.’ (a quasi-satirical video about breast-feeding – google it if you dare.) Don’t crucify me; I added a disclaimer. ;)
Kristen Mae recently posted..15 Things You Should Give Up In Order to Be Happy – Rebut
Love this. I’m totally guilty of putting up a ton of pictures and status updates regarding my kids. Only stuff I think is funny, but still. The problem is, as a stay at home mom of 2 little kids, I have NOTHING else going on. It’s sad. It’s pathetic. But it’s my reality. I totally get that my FB friends don’t give a flying fuck about my kids, adorable as they are. Likewise, I give no fucks about their half marathons. But such is FB.
But talk about nipples, placentas, and other unmentionables? Totally not FB fodder. (Confession: I may or may not have posted a picture of my 2 yo on the potty.)
And another thing: I agree that parents and non-parents should be able to get along. Trouble is, in real life, they often have nothing at all in common. My friends who are still globe-trotting and spending small fortunes on fancy sofas just don’t get me anymore. And I am sickeningly jealous of them. Add that to the fact that they are still wearing the pants size from 5-10 years ago, and I can’t even look them in the eye. They cannot understand my FUPA.
Allison @ Motherhood, WTF? recently posted..A Song for Retirement?
I get all your points and, well, still enjoy your blog because I think there are things everyone can relate to. With friendships, I think it’s important to realize that people do grow apart for many reasons–some get new jobs, some have kids, some get new interests. If you can make it work, great. If you can’t, sometimes you move on. It doesn’t mean something’s wrong with you, just that you’ve simply evolved.
It’s laying the guilt trip on–in both directions–that rankles my feathers, so to speak.
Abby recently posted..How To Piss Off Mommy Bloggers
So glad that there was no facebook when my kid was a baby..because I, out of sheer boredom and desperation for human contact, would have posted EVERYTHING!,
As a former non-mom and still aspiring hermit, I applaud you.
I no longer go on Facebook because I don’t want to see what my friends’ kids had for dinner. I tell friends not to take it personally because I’ve also unfriended family members for this same reason (I’m talking to you, MOM).
Rhana @ Dumb {Squared} recently posted..Fuck you, diaper. Fuck. You.
What does it say about me that I am a mom and that I agree with this post?
I think this: no wonder the moms in my small community don’t care for me.
they see it in my face.
NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR STUFF BUT YOU. I keep my stuff to MY SELF.
Loved this post.
Alexandra recently posted..Don’t Make It Like I’m The Only One
Thanks for an excellent post (hilarious).
And the comments are so fun to read!
As the mom of a 14 year old I am sick of my own posts and now will only post about my adorable dog.
So, I enjoyed your writing so much that I went to your blog (more is better) where I was confused to read that you ” wanted to quit blogging tonight”.
This was because of the comments on this page? On this article?
I mostly see women who agree with you, praise your writing or you disagree and explain why. Out of the 98 posts I see 3 or 4 that don’t get you.
No where do I see “pissed off mommy bloggers”.
Mostly women with a sense of humor and an appreciation for your post.
I wish that you saw that too.
Hey there!
I got your comment and thank you for reading my rambles. It wasn’t the comments on this post that got to me, but rather the comments on the SM Facebook page. This discussion has been nothing but respectful, and I fully “own” and dissenting opinions with no problem. But the FB page got a little rough, and to be honest, it just got to me a bit initially.
I would never let someone make me feel inferior or force me to quit doing what I love, and after I took a step back and regrouped, I realize that was a silly thing to say. But it did make me question “Why do I blog about XYZ? Is it selfish?” Then I realized that was lame, as I blog for the conversation and connections I’ve made and continue to make, not to satisfy some random rabid clan.
So thank you for your comments. I try to be funny, to be serious, to be thoughtful, to be snarky–but most of all, I just try to be me :)
Abby recently posted..How To Piss Off Mommy Bloggers
Holy S***t!!! I just read the facebook page!! How can people be so mean!? I apologize for all of those (insert really nasty words here) women who apparently have NO sense of humor nor respect. And I am sorry for my earlier post!
Now I get it, Abby, and I am sorry that you were exposed to that.
Keep blogging, I’ll keep reading.
Hi Abby! Good to see you posting here! Quite a lively debate you’ve initiated. I liked the post and in reading all the comments (and your replies) I must say that you poked the bear. ;) Not that it’s a bad thing, because I love a good debate!
There is one thing that no one has touched on and that is the phenomenon called “Mommy Brain”. It’s surprisingly frustrating to realize that the little bundle you just gave life to has not only stolen your heart but also your memory/sense of direction/ability to focus/intelligence/etc. So if I’m telling you the story of how my infant hates beets for the 5th time it’s because ohmygod my brain is mush.
Good for you for choosing to keep your intelligence & wit intact! Not all women feel the urge to procreate and even then many do it just because of the pressure.
I’m not on Facebook (for many many reasons) so the only people who get hit with a multitude of baby crap are those who read my blog (that I never post on) or who I see on a daily basis (ie my husband & he actually cares!) To those moms who must over-share?? Go to a moms group!! We’ll talk about your baby’s diaper contents all day long.
Jessie @ Graze With Me recently posted..What I Ate Wednesday
Jessie! I miss you! Glad to know things are going well :)
Abby recently posted..How To Piss Off Mommy Bloggers
I think it is all about knowing your audience. If I’m with a group of mommy friends then it is okay to prattle on about what all of our kids are doing. Just like if I’m with a group of auditors we are going to go on and on about auditing (trust me when I say NO one else wants to hear about that). With Facebook (and other social media) the audience is mixed. No one wants to hear tons of info about my kids. The occasional funny thing they do to embarrass me? Probably. How magnificent they are on a constant basis? Even I don’t want to hear that. I can totally see where you are coming from. Sorry those other folks were rude to you.
Jennifer recently posted..The Dinner Dilemma
Nice post. lol. I have a kid of my own, but I don’t have facebook. Before I had a kid, I love my niece to death, but really? My sister bought me a picture frame and put a picture of her in it for my Christmas present when I spent tons of money on her and my niece? If you don’t know what to get someone and you don’t have much, even $5 in a card (or just a card) is something I could have used more. I think I ended up donating the picture frame because I don’t display pictures or hang them up with how much we’re moving. I know it’s more of the thought that counts, but I don’t even think she thought about that.
Actually i have learned to use a filter when talking to my co-workers. Must remember they do not want to hear about my kids all the time. But sometimes i just know what else to talk about!
A good co-worker of mine has 3 dogs and 4 cats. I tell her a baby story and she tells me a doggy/kitty story. We even give each other advice on how to handle behavior.
Thank you Baby Jesus that you put into words what I’ve been thinking all along.
I’m childless. Wait. Let me take that back. I have a husband of almost 6 years and a dog so I’ve technically got two children though I will never change either of their diapers. I’m ditching the husband for a newer model soon as he hits diaper age. Just sayin’.
Anyway, I have multiple cousins, siblings, siblings in law who take to the i-net to post as many things that they probably shouldn’t be posting. Seriously – I do not need a heads up shot of your child on the potty after finishing their very first, what do they call it these days, “doodle”. Nor do I want to hear about their admitting to having shat their pants and giggling.
It’s called a filter and just like childless parents who can’t seem to shut up about that “one drunken princess they took home and with whom they made dents in their headboard” it takes all the muscles in the fingers not to post long diatribes.
Wait… this might count as a long diatribe. Shoot.
Brandon S. recently posted..My Chemical Romance – A Love Affair with Geeky Interiors
I have several cousins and nieces that fall into the overshare category in the worst way, and they don’t have kids. I don’t know why people feel the need to share soooo much. What’s even worse though are the drama hounds… “can anything else possibly go wrong?” then there are 15 comments, “what happened?” “need to talk?” “oh no! what’s wrong??” etc. Then they comment, “I don’t really want to talk about it right now”… then why the heck are you posting on FB??? They need a warning sign, just like at the zoo “Please don’t feed the drama queen”
I do post about my daughter though, almost exclusively. I warn everyone that friends me on FB right from the get go that I created an account to share photos and updates about my daughter with my family back east and in Iceland. So if they choose to friend me, that’s what they’ll see. That being said I don’t think I overshare considering sometimes I go a week without posting anything and I never post anything terribly personal. But it is all about my daughter, so people have to block me or just unfriend me if they don’t want to see it and I won’t take offense. Yes, I have a life outside my daughter, I just don’t care to share it over social media with every person I’ve ever known that decides to friend me :D
Barbara recently posted..DIY I-Spy Bag
This post is as self-absorbed as its asking parents not to be. When you’re in the epic, relentless business of making human life and protecting its survival, petty ideas like a non-parent’s idea of polite conversation are so irrelevant that my eyes crossed with boredom just reading this. I would be so unbelievably fine being defriended. In fact, I’ll do it first.