I bought my husband an iPad & all I got was a pounding headache

93 Comments

I bought Jeff an iPad last week for our anniversary. He’s been lusting after one for months and with his crazy travel schedule and long commute, I couldn’t argue that it wasn’t the worst idea ever. Happy Anniversary, my love, and hello nightmare for me.

Sure, it’s not all bad. There is no more fighting over the laptop or having to log in and out of Facebook and Gmail constantly, but the trade off just isn’t worth it. I’ve never seen my husband this excited, and frankly, it’s pretty annoying.

He’s always on his iPad. I know, I know, I’m always on my laptop or iPhone, but it’s so much more irritating when your spouse does it. He is totally and completely obsessed with the functionality, features and ease of the machine. And, the apps. Oh, the apps…

Suddenly, he can be the architect he wanted to be as a kid. He can build cities and skyscrapers and map out streets! Amazing! And then there’s the restaurant he always wanted to own. Now, it can be his! He gets to buy food and layout the space and serve customers! And then, he can be damn Buddhist and take a break from all the building and serving with the free meditation app.

But worst of all, by far, is the fact that he can be the singer he was never meant to be. He downloaded the Glee karaoke app, and it just may be the reason we don’t make it our eleventh anniversary. My ears are bleeding, my head is pounding and I will never buy my husband another gadget again. Think I’m exaggerating? I present you Glee’s Imagine by Jeff, along with my most sincerest apologies.

Comments

    • 2

      Scary Mommy says

      You’re better off, not. There was just really no other way to illustrate my point, but you shouldn’t be subjected to it. You’d have nightmares.

  1. 4

    Casey says

    Nope. I can’t do it, either. Just back from a 7 hour day trip with 3 kids. My head’s pounding is compliments of them.

  2. 8

    Erin says

    OMG that’s hilarious! My hubs said he would shoot me if I ever put something of him singing on my blog and I said well we don’t have to worry about it because I’m not buying you an Ipad and you won’t have the glee karaoke! HAHA

    • 9

      Scary Mommy says

      It was his idea to add the link. Granted he wasn’t sober, but he did approve it. Wonder if it will seem like such a good idea when he was up. Heehee.

  3. 10

    Kim says

    It is so sweet that he’s enjoying his iPad so much (envious beyond belief) but oh Boy, I’m at a loss for words after hearing him sing – sorry too Jeff.

  4. 11

    Adrian says

    That’s funny. If I got my husband and iPad, all he’d do is check sports scores with it and play Mah Jhong. That’s all he does with his computer. He can barely do Email – he’s a tech-tard!

  5. 12

    Drew says

    Seriously? It has autotune, and it STILL sounds like that?

    Well, that’s not fair, really. I thought his take was very interesting, tune-wise. Especially the falsetto on “you-oo-oo-oo-oo.” And I think you’re a very brave and wonderful spouse.

  6. 14

    Bethany says

    Oh my gosh…that was quite entertaining. Good effort, Jeff! I was almost too scared to listen but pushed through…listening to lots of “singers” now- haha!

  7. 15

    Yvonne says

    How hilarious! Does this app auto-tune? It doesn’t work very well eh? Haha, I wish I had it so I could screw around on it with my husband. :) Why don’t you two do an annoying duet and make it a date?

  8. 18

    Tricia says

    I, too, am obsessed with my iPad…and my husband bought it for me. So you and my husband are in the same position: wanting to throw the iPad into oncoming traffic.

  9. 19

    Life with Kaishon says

    My computer, which isn’t an apple anything and is very, very old with 9 missing keys, can’t play any sounds right now, so sadly, I can’t listen! Hopefully the sound will be back up and running soon so I can enjoy this little diddy : ) I know it will be special! : )

  10. 20

    Loralee says

    So, I clicked on it.

    OMG.

    WOW.

    Just…WOW.

    Umm…Yeah.

    Maybe we should just go back to that amazingly sweet comment he left you the other day instead of focusing on his Glee apps? Maybe? :)

  11. 22

    Chaplain Donna says

    How funny! It reminds me of when my daughter was young. I hated when people bought her the loud toys with horns, songs and buzzing. The noise was not fun. If you are lucky his singing will improve.

  12. 26

    Deanna says

    I must be crazy, I clicked on your name and then I was able to access even more songs (thought maybe you’d want to know). Thanks for the laughs!! Beth song cracked me up. Safety Dance I couldn’t finish tho.

  13. 28

    Jill says

    Wow … I’m just not sure who owes who more. Bless you both.

    And happy belated anniversary to you! I saw your photos in your last post – you were a gorgeous bride! I couldn’t remember if I stopped by to wish you all the best on 10 years. Mazel Tov!

  14. 29

    Dragonfly says

    Oh my.. oh my… that can not be what John Lennon intended LOL
    Has he heard his own recording? (that killed all my aspirations of ever becoming a singer..).

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