If you are a man who has always wanted to frolic in a romper, your dreams have just come true
If you are looking for an early Father’s Day present, look no further. There is a new trend sweeping menswear and you are going to want to get in early on this one. We bring you — the RompHim.
Don’t be jealous ladies, it’s not a romper. It’s a RompHim. Though whoever is in charge of marketing should be fired because clearly this is a Bromper. Regardless, it’s basically a onesie for dudes who have decided to throw caution (and possibly their pride) to the wind this summer.
Everyone should wear whatever makes them happy, so if you come across a RompHim and think to yourself “this is what has been missing in my life,” more power to you — buy the shit out of it. But be warned, the opportunity for mooseknuckle (male cameltoe) seems extraordinarily high with these puppies (ask any woman who has worn a romper). So we are forced to ask the simple question: “But why though?”
According to their Kickstarter page, the RompHim is designed to “turn heads and break hearts when you take your ROMPHIM for a spin. Is it a romper specifically designed for men? Sure, but it’s also so much more.” Okay, settle down there, sir. It’s a romper, not a Transformer.
The RompHim was made for your everyday outings – concerts, the beach, rooftops and pool parties (i.e. all the places you used to go before you had kids). But we’re trying to picture the RompHim on a bunch of dads bending over to pick up their kid’s sippy cup at the neighborhood park, or coaching T-ball, or maneuvering down a slide in a 90 degree indoor play park on a Saturday. It’s not a pretty picture.
It seems the folks on Twitter agree. The RompHim is like the Axe body spray of men’s leisurewear:
@fmanjoo Just me, in a RompHim, with a fidget spinner, and a grande Unicorn Latte. That's what I want the world to remember about 2017.
— Myke (@MikeWehner) May 15, 2017
I will kick my friends in the balls if they try to wear a RompHim around me. That's what good friends are for.
— Gran Fuma aka 3BPM (@Gran_Fuma) May 15, 2017
Forms of Birth Control:
1/ The Pill
3/ A man wearing a #RompHim & Crocs
— c00per (@c00per___) May 15, 2017
Even with this new Trump bit, the worst news of the day is that some asshole made a romper for men #ROMPHIM
— Justin Carpenter (@LCD_Carpsystem) May 15, 2017
Seeing a man wearing a #RompHim makes me want to do the opposite.
— Alexis Novak (@AlexisGirlNovak) May 15, 2017
Whoever designed this is genius because they created a zipper fly, saving all romper-wearing men from having to strip completely naked to go pee. But be warned if you have to go number two gentleman, because the RompHim will leave you shivering in a public restroom while you try to keep your romper from hitting the pee-soaked ground with one hand while you wipe with the other, all the while perched perilously just above the toilet seat. Ask us how we know.
Clearly some folks love what these guys are selling, because the business school friends have already raised over $42,000. If you would like to back this project, you still have 28 days to pledge a donation and become a “RompHero” (don’t kill the messenger).