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My DH........the no good piece of sh*t!
  • graysonsmommy
    Posts: 24Member
    OMG!!!! I could just throw a brick at DH head and laugh about it! He thinks all he has to do is go to work and make the money. He never does anything at all to help me around the house! I am a SAHM and I do the housework and cooking etc.., but I refuse to be a fucking slave! At my house, we all wash our own plates when we are done eating. Yeah, everyone but him! He says all I do is bitch at him for no reason. FUCKING DO SOMETHING FOR ONCE IN YOUR PATHETIC LITTLE LIFE AND I WON'T BITCH!!!!! We have screaming and cussing matches daily. I am so unhappy in this relationship and we have only been married almost 2 years. At this point I would leave for a while, if I had somewhere for my kids and myself to go. I am just at a loss as to what to do. I want to be married to him because I know the man he can be. I just need to figure out what to do to get it out of him.
  • AloneOverseasAloneOverseas
    Posts: 2,240Member
    If talking is nothing more than a screaming match, the it seems you may need to try counselling sooner rather than later ...
    I love purple; I love cats. Imagine if cats were purple ...
  • KellynnKellynn
    Posts: 1,988Member
    There's another thread floating around just today about what you expect from your husband. Maybe you should join in that one, it's getting a lot of posts, and put yours on there. Hugs to you.
  • boring_nameboring_name
    Posts: 667Member
    @graysonsmommy I fully understand your frustration. 

    " I want to be married to him because I know the man he can be. I just need to figure out what to do to get it out of him."

    YOU can't do anything.. he has to want it.. struggling with similar 'want' (different circumstances)... Take care and keep venting.. I hope you can get through it. 
    B
  • graysonsmommy
    Posts: 24Member
    Thanks y'all! He and I actually talked today for the first time in quite a while. I told him that we need to get counseling because I am to the point that I want to leave. He didn't like that idea and I didn't want to argue, so I let it go. DD1 and DD2 left with my mom so he and I had more time to talk. He said he had been thinking and that he will go wherever and do whatever I want him to if it will keep me from leaving. It could be just talk, but I am gonna take it and run with it. I hope we can work things out.
  • WildandFree
    Posts: 1,588Member
    Divvy up the chores. Maybe he's more traditional and views your "job" as running the household while he does his job. It's not exactly uncommon. That's kind of how it works with dh and myself. I'm the one who makes the money and works and we split up chores. On my work days he cleans. On my off days I clean. That way we both do our share and the other gets a break. Certain chores that I can stand (kitchen duty and trash) he does, and the chores he can't stand (laundry and bathroom) I do. I hope you guys can come to some sort of compromise.
  • GritsGrits
    Posts: 3,751Member
    MellowYellow said:

    Divvy up the chores. Maybe he's more traditional and views your "job" as running the household while he does his job. It's not exactly uncommon. That's kind of how it works with dh and myself. I'm the one who makes the money and works and we split up chores. On my work days he cleans. On my off days I clean. That way we both do our share and the other gets a break. Certain chores that I can stand (kitchen duty and trash) he does, and the chores he can't stand (laundry and bathroom) I do. I hope you guys can come to some sort of compromise.



    This works for us, too. I also am the only one working outside the home right now, and he's really never done the SAHD thing, especially not with a new baby. But since I know that he loathes housework, I'll do as much as I can when I can. I also don't overdo it and leave him to relax all day. We fought about it a lot at first, but it saved both our sanity when we decided that I would pitch in and take the dishes or the laundry when I had time...something like that. He didn't feel like he was being relegated to homemaker status and I don't feel like a single parent to 4 kids, one of which is older than I am. That's not good math! LOL  I like being a SAHM, but he's only a SAHD because he's out of work right now. He's a little out of his element.
    "I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day, and I believe in miracles." ~Audrey Hepburn
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