Ten to twenty yrs from now so I heard still waiting too. I think I like animals more than kids now.

Dd is 1and 1/2 and I'm still waiting. I am definitely working very hard right now to get
Myself back to who I was and be a good mommy.

Even the Moms that seem to have their shit together DON'T have it together. They still have to fight with their kids at bathtime, to get them to wear clothes, wash poop off walls, and lock themselves in the bathroom to cry just like us normal moms do. Don't be so hard on yourself. But do take time to do something that makes you feel good. I take baths after DS goes to bed, light some candles, and just BREATH. Works wonders for me. It helps me feel like "myself" for a few minutes.

Sometime around the time they mov to college.

 

Honestly I don't feel like being a mom comes naturally to me. There's a reason they say it takes a village to raise a child. So that when one person has been driven to the point or wanting to gag and hogtie them there's someone else who's fresh to come in and take over. Kids are chaos personified. It's just the way they're wired. You may not feel like it "clicks" but it does get easier. Especially when they're old enough to start doing things for themselves.

I think that it is harder when you stay home with them.  Every other job gets breaks and vacation days, but not SAHM.  Is there a way that you can get a break away, to spend some time doing what you would like to do?

My brother is in charge of the kids on Saturdays, so his gf gets a break from the 6 kids.  This probably isn't doable for most families, but even if someone can watch him for a few hours it would help. 

For me, feeling like a "natural" mom and not knowing what the heck I was doing or how this little one could possibly turn out okay with me as the mom varied.  Just hang in there, and keep asking for help here at SM!

I agree @fatchickonabike. Of course, I keep having babies every 4 years, so my balance gets snatched away as quickly as it arrives. But really, I think it's just the tremendous responsibility that comes with caring for such a tiny little person. Until they're 4 or 5, there's not much that they don't need you for, and it's overwhelming at times, for sure. What keeps me going is the realization that it won't be so long before they're too old to depend on me (in their eyes, anyway) and so I try to find as much joy in these trying times as possible. So when I want to stuff DD8 in a closet with duct tape over her smart mouth and hang DD3 by her toes, I look at baby boy and remind myself that it won't last forever, and to just hang in there. Anyone who leads you to believe that they've always got it together is full of shit...and you can tell 'em I said so!

I love DH very much but he is the definition of a square. I find it difficult to be the real me, let my true spirit out? Does that sound ridiculous? I'm constantly trying to conform to being a MOMMy. On top of everything and happy and active and bullshit..... I seriously think I should start meditating and looking into Buddhism, I need to figure my shit out!

I think that this feeling comes down to not feeling appreciated! Once you become a mother everything in your life has to change. This change is not as jurastic for a father. There feels to be no time for yourself, when you clean up its a mess in five minutes, those dishes will litterlay sit in the sink for a week if you dont do them! I have been were you are and I can tell you that communication finally helped. Sometime the role needs to change make the hubby do it all for a day! Breakfast, snack, nap, lunch, playtime, snack, dinner, bath, bedtime, clean, plan next day.....ect  Not including all the repeating we do to get the kids to mind. When my husband did this and when i got home the house was a mess, the kids was a mess and he looked at me and said how do you do this everyday! That made me feel so much better he also helps me more in the evening know that he knows i never have five minute to myself! Even if you can pick on night a week for an hour to lock yourself in the room you will feel better! You are a good wife and a good mom you feel like you arnt because no one appriciates what you do! So from one mom to another you are awesome and apprictaed becuae you have one of the hardest jobs ever with shit pay!!! :)) Hugs to you! I hope you have a wonderful mothers day!

I may not know what I'm doing, but for me at least it clicked soon as I peed on the stick. There are good days and bad days, but maybe you could find something that you enjoy doing with the little man? As far as routine goes.. Girl we all have routines and examples of things that might work (even earlier bedtimes) to get you some "you" time.. Hard to be a wild child and a mom ya know? But if you have family that will take them, why not just go out either with or without your man?!

I don't think it ever really 'clicks', because we were all someone else before we had kids.  It's hard looking back and remembering how "me" I was pre-children.  We believe motherhood should be all sunshine and roses, and we perpetuate that ideal by lying to ourselves and others. But that's why Scary Mommy is here.  Motherhood is a challenge, punctuated by moments of bliss.  10 years ago I was single, and Me; now I'm married and in a relationship with 3 very different guys, all whom I love -- my DH, my DS5 and my DS2.  It's exhausting thinking about and organizing the lives of 3 other people.  I think back to my own childhood, and it certainly wasn't a "Leave it to Beaver" life, but it was good enough. :-)  Motherhood isn't supposed to be perfect, because I'm not, and neither are my husband and boys.  But we try to have fun together and work hard at making happy moments when we can.  Don't beat yourself up -- just air it out here.  We're all here for each other.  Scary Mommies Unite!