Sounds like my ds, he shuts down completely when mad or hurt, never sits still, but does amazing in school with mo behavior issues. Was he crazy as a baby/toddler? Mine made me damn near lose my mind daily until he was about 5-6 , he's 9 now.

Before I had kids I never understood that phrase "he's all boy", in fact it irritated the shit out of me. Then I had one of each... And I GOT it! Boys are wired differently than girls. Surely, some of it might be environmental but not all of it. My ds7 and dd4 have been raised the same way, exposed to the same things, etc. But they are so frigging different. Example; I got them matching teddy bears for Valentines Day. Bears are exactly the same. You can hold them up next to each other and there's no question who's is who's. Dd's is perfect with his little red bow around his neck and he lives on her bed with all her other "babies". Ds's on the other hand... Red bow is now a ninja headband, it's all mangy looking from all of it's adventures. (Being hit by RC cars, doing jumps off the slide in one of his trucks, you name it!) Boys are just... BOYS! I really wouldn't be to worried about it @NoDramaMama. He sounds like most of the 8 year old boys I know.

@episcopal, no not at all. Because ADD/ADHD can't be 'turned off'. He gets hyper, but like I said, he holds conversations, sits for LONG periods of time reading, will sit & play checkers/card games for hours, etc.  Maybe 'excited' would be a better word.

Does anyone have any tips for handling such experiences? @sanityseeker, he was so busy!! As a baby, he just had places to go & things with wheels to run all over LOL.

@scholarmom4 -, Sorry I didn't see your post (I hate being ignored haha) & I agree with you. Thanks sanityseeker, it's so frustrating because the guys in our family just love him to pieces. I just hate that grown women cop an attitude because they expect him to sit & respond like a girl. I have 2 girls as well and boys are different. There's nothing wrong with that. It's just nice knowing I'm not alone :)

GypsyMama,    YOU, my dear, are a lifesaver!!! Those are fantastic ideas that I intend on putting to good use. THANK YOU!!!

Both my boys were/are like this. Both are ADHD too. Some days I want to crawl in a hole and wait for them to grow up and get the hell out. lol

NoDramaMama said:

@episcopal, no not at all. Because ADD/ADHD can't be 'turned off'. He gets hyper, but like I said, he holds conversations, sits for LONG periods of time reading, will sit & play checkers/card games for hours, etc.  Maybe 'excited' would be a better word.

Does anyone have any tips for handling such experiences? @sanityseeker, he was so busy!! As a baby, he just had places to go & things with wheels to run all over LOL.

@nodramamama  My DS has ADD and can still sit for long time periods, hold long involved conversations, is extremely polite etc... He still annoys the crap out of a lot of people because when he does get overstimulated he has a tough time coming down from it. 

I agree with a lot of what you're all saying, but I must admit that in my personal opinion, I believe ADD/ADHD to be extremely over diagnosed (not to be rude) but even if someone did tell me he was (which I & his father still say he isn't, he's a boy) I would choose not to medicate either way. I grew up with boys & he isn't any different than any other healthy, rambunctious boy. My issue is dealing with other Moms who have no experience with small boys & are bitchy with my young son.

Thank you _bogart_!! I should have picked a better title I guess. Something more like "How do you handle mean, nasty bitchy hags who think they can talk mean to an "active" son?" I have absolutely zero desire to change anything about him or his personality, just need some tips is all, to handle other Moms or maybe help him with 'people' skills.

I debated long and hard on whether to have my son evaluated for ADD and held off until he was in the 4th grade when his inattentiveness was interfering with his education. We chose not to medicate but have the diagnosis in affect at school so accommodations can be made to fit HIS needs over him trying to be a "cookie cutter kid". ADD doesn't always have to be a 'bad' thing.. it's just a thing. 

These busy, energetic boys are not terrorizing, they are exploring the world at a high speed from four dimensions. Do your boys dismantle everything they get their hands on? Well think about it. You have to know how to take things apart in order to know how to put them back together. My boys dismantled everything in their path until they were 13 and finally started putting things back together.

I do believe there is ADD/ADHD but I would say 98% of boys are diagnosed to force them to a school system that is not appropriate for their learning needs. Getting the dx isn't bad in one way because it gets federal law behind you to force the school to teach them properly. An example: the younger twin had hypoglycemia in 5th grade. He needed to eat a snack a couple of times in the school day. He was putting it in his back pack and disrupting the class when he was getting it. The teachers rebelled and called us in. After some debate I suggested they let him sit in the back of the room so the other kids wouldn't see him. This alarmed them. They wanted this kid within arms reach so they could discipline him not at the back of the room wreaking havoc beyond their reach! They covered this by saying it would be unsafe to put a desk in the walk space. I said let him sit on the floor. Much arguing took place but I prevailed. A few days went by and I asked him how it was going. He said that they were making him sit under the table in the back of the room. I was PISSED! So I made an unannounced visit to the school the next day. I stood looking through the window and there is my son laying on his belly under the table, eating his snack and doing his written assignment! He spent the rest of fifth grade under the table. It was his BEST year grade wise.

If you get the dx please don't medicate for the school! If you need to do it so you'll survive parenting him then maybe but don't do it because the school says you must. You will have some fighting on your hands but with ADD law behind you, you can carve out what he needs and you know that better than anyone. And before you medicate try diet. Eliminate dyes, preservatives, sugar, maybe gluten, only complex carbs.

Btw my boys both have learning disabilities: perceptual communicative disorder. We refused to have them tested for attention deficit. Neither could read until the 4th grade when I discovered they liked cabelas catalogs. I called cabelas and told them the story and they sent me 20 old catalogs. That's how they learned to read. The under the table kid is now a journeyman electrician and the other one is a master mechanic with his own business.

Thanks @TorturedbyTWINS :) your babies are adorable! There has been nothing easy about being my boys' mom but I have to say its been marvelously entertaining.

Lol this is ONE success story in the long and dramatic relationship. That son is also not speaking to me right now. That sucks but I know it will happen when it happens.

Sounds like a normal kid who loves other kids to me.  My kid is the definition of over active, and as long as he is being respectful and not destructive, it's their problem, not yours.

My DS7 I'd the same. I hate it when parents judge. @Irishlass my son loves splashing in puddles and usually I'm jumping with him! I definitely get a lot of judgemental looks. And get stared at by uptight mum's cause I have piercings and pink hair. It's ridiculous! I'm still a good mummy!

I will take my DS4.5's energy any day of the week. He is intelligent, thoughtful, compassionate, imaginative and all around wonderful.  So he has (what seems like) more energy than other kids his age?  We just figure out ways to utilize the energy.  I bought an on the floor/mat type of game that plugs into the tv.....when it's rainy and icky out he can jump and dance his little heart out.  When we go to the library, we have to make 3 laps around the gym first.  You will get used to what works for you!  Parenting is nothing but trial and error right? 

Not as much as I look at them like if they don't shut the fuck up, I'm going to punch them in the throat!! Well, in my head anyways.