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daycare yes or no?
  • jezebeldelilahjezebeldelilah
    Posts: 337Member
    My 14 month old has never been around other kids and I am considering socializing her with a pt daycare. She is very gentle and loving and has never really been sick. I'm so worried that she will start biting and be sick constantly. Should I wait or should I put her around other kids now?
  • BellaBefanaBellaBefana
    Posts: 8,720Member
    I had mine in at 5-6 months, just part time...2-3 days a week, but that young I didn't have much choice.  She will likely catch colds, it's a fact of being around other children.  As for the biting, I think some do, some don't.  Mine didn't bite, but she got bit a few times, that pissed me off, but at least it didn't draw blood.  I did have fits about that.  

    There was a lot I did and didn't like about day care, when I'd finally had enough (breakfast of cinnamon/sugar on flour tortillas with apple juice did it for me) I moved her to a private in-home day care.  She stopped being sick frequently (though the PE tubes in her ears helped with that immensely), she was fed REAL food, and was well-care for.

    I personally don't think it's too soon to get her around other kids, but really check out the centers you consider...the one I used supposedly had ONLY "certified" early ed teachers...that was a complete crock!
    Bite me, cupcake!
  • OnmylastnerveOnmylastnerve
    Posts: 1,648Member
    I don't think you have to start daycare, playgrounds and play groups do the same thing and you don't have to pay.
    not my chair, not my problem
  • littlebitz
    Posts: 123Member
    You could look around for a nursery school/preschool program as oppossed to a day care. They usually run 2~4 hours a day and the one we used you could have your child a minimum of 2 days or all 5. We did 2 days a week to start. My second child never went to preschool and although she did great academically she did have a little bit harder time socially. My first child did go to preschool and does great socializing.
  • AnonUser31
    Posts: 327Guest
    I didn't do daycare until ds was almost 3. Everyone else that watched him before was family. He did get bit. It was a home daycare. And I'm very fortunate that the biting from another kid was all that happened. (it was a younger kid that bit him) and it never happened again.
  • LifeofchaosLifeofchaos
    Posts: 996Member
    What about playgroups or story time at the library? Unless she is locked in a closet somewhere I don't think not being around other kids is going to hurt her development at this young age. My twins web to daycare and were sick ALL the time,.. My youngest has never been to daycare and has been super healthy. She isn't around many kids other then her sibling who are 2 1/2 yrs older and we won't be starting her in preschool til she is 3
  • BellaBefanaBellaBefana
    Posts: 8,720Member
    It depends on the environment...once I took dd out of the $200/week one and put her in to the private home one, she was fine...never even a runny nose, plus because there were only about 5 kids total, she got a lot of one on one and just started blooming "academically."  She's scary smart, but being around both kids her own age and a couple a little older, she just shot out...
    Bite me, cupcake!
  • canadamom
    Posts: 867Member
    I would do Mommy and me swimming, library times - In the great white north here we have Indoor Playgrounds at some Rec centers with mats and slide and ride em toys, balls and other fun stuff so moms can get the kids out of the house in the winter.  

    If you are wanting a break from her to get our nails done or something, there is no harm in finding a daycare or dayhome that will take drop ins- gets u both used to the seperation and her used to the routine of a different place.
  • Charlotte_SometimesCharlotte_Sometimes
    Posts: 1,756Member
    I agree with the posters recommending other options.  I didn't have either of mine in daycare, just preschool at age 4.  They were fine.  They spent time with other kids via La Leche League meetings, playgroups, mom groups, etc.   :)   They were babysat from time to time by my family or a friend when it was needed.

     Maybe a Mom's day out program if you want some free time during the day?   Usually brief and inexpensive and smaller groups.

    @canadamom -- indoor playgrounds?  Are they free?  That's awesome.  Around here we need the same but for summer.  Brutal, long summers and the streets are like ghost towns, everyone locked up tight in the AC when possible.   That or the public pools which are filled to capacity!
    "But a lesson must be lived in order to be learned" Ani DiFranco, Manhole
    "Screw you guys! I'm going home." Eric Cartman
  • ChristyJChristyJ
    Posts: 902Member

    I didn't do daycare until he was three.  He was sick for two years, but the pediatrician told me he was going to get all the usuals at one time or another so should get them out of the way before school.  Unfortunately, he was bullied apparently for three months and I did not find out untl two weeks before he left for Kindergarten.  All I was told was the kid who was bulling Alex and the rest of his family had been asked to leave.  WTF, when did this happen?  Poor kid took it in such good stride he never even told me.

    Imperfect and proud of it.
  • jezebeldelilahjezebeldelilah
    Posts: 337Member
    I live in middle of absolutely nowhere. Some ideas I'm jealous of cause I would love to have those options. Thanks to you all for some great ideas. I'm recently diagnosed with a neurological disorder and am slowly losing my ability to walk. I want to enjoy every minute with my girl until that happens. Another reason why the options with having her vs. Dropping her off are so appealing. Thanks everyone!
  • SuburbanKenzoSuburbanKenzo
    Posts: 43Member
    I've had my DD in daycare since she was 4 months old & it has been one of the best decision my DH & I made. Now at first I had my reservations, all the kids in my family were watched by family/friends, or had the SAHM gig going on so daycare was so foreign to me and my hubby. We did research, I have a benefit with my job that'll help me search for accredited centers, so that helped narrow it down for us. My DD absolutely has the best time and she is getting all the socialization and even education at an age appropriate level.
    Now it's not all peaches & cream, believe me. She was pretty much sick the whole first year of her being there, but I go on the philosophy that kids are walking germ farms and its hard to NOT have a sick child. Its bound to happen and you just need to resolve yourself to that. Once that first spring came, she's been WAY better with colds and such. This past year we've only dealt with 2 or 3 major colds, 1 ear infection, and 1 bout with the stomach bug. That's not bad, believe me.
    There's also the communication factor of the "teachers" and the parents. They are very informative if anything should be going around like chicken pox, measles, even head lice. There were a few times where I had to repeat things (ex: We stopped using a pacifier around her 1st b-day, they were still using one well after that). That is a little annoying. Most of the "teachers" are young women, in college and have a lot to learn about how to interact with the parents, so everyone is learning how to communicate and I'm willing to work with them, if they're willing to do the same.

    Sorry this was long but I wanted to let you know how daycare was for us, and its not as bad as it may sound. I hope there are programs out there that wouldn't be so expensive as daycare (hate when I get that monthly bill) but I look at how my DD is thriving and the money is absolutely worth it. Good luck on your search!
    why give 100% when 35 will get you paid & laid? - Kenny Powers :-P
  • NorthernMommyNorthernMommy
    Posts: 347Member

    We have experienced both a private dayhome and a licensed daycare facility.  When DS was 8 mos, he went into a private dayhome.  I had significant concerns about the nutrition, the discipline, the germs, etc (i.e. - the tv was the babysitter), as well as the fact that the dayhome had far more children than the lady was capable of carefully looking after.  The other factor that really upset me was how often the dayhome provider was 'sick', so that I had to stay home to look after DS when she couldn't.  There was no break on the cost when she was sick.

    So - after looking into the daycares in our city, we moved DS to a daycare co-operative and it is the best decision we could have made.  1 - he's gotten exposure to all kinds of germs/sickness, etc and therefore is building a great immune system (I'm a believer in getting them exposed to everyting now, when they are easier to take care of), 2 - they don't take sick days, 3 - all of the food is made in house and 4 - they are literally the best teachers ever!  We love our daycare - the kids are happy, the teachers are fantastic, they help with the potty training process, they are helping DS communicate with us, even though he won't talk.  I couldn't rave on enough about how much we love our daycare.

    But - reality is that we are all swayed by where we've had the best experiences.  DS has come home with bite marks, did a short stint biting, comes homes with bumps and scrapes from playing, etc and this happened at both the dayhome and the daycare.  It's a personal choice, but take time to yourself please!

  • iamslowlygoingcrazy
    Posts: 145Member
    My kids go to a Y daycare and I couldn't rave enough about it. Great teachers, affordable, great menu, etc. I've really noticed a change in my daughter since she's been going and love to see the kids building friendships and becoming more confident. Of course we have to deal with all of the germs but I figure they are going to experience that sooner or later. They are a big help with potty training because the younger ones see the older kids doing it and want to try too. Definetly check into the centers in your area and programs offered. Our menus are always posted a week in advance and always healthy, the kids drink water for snacks and milk for meals. Find one that's the right fit for your family and go with it :)
  • GirlsOnly
    Posts: 142Member
    @chlomom - I'm so sorry to hear about your disorder! It must be a really tough experience for you and your family! You have a wonderful attitude about wanting to make the most of your mobile time with your daughter. She is so lucky you're her Mommy!!! And when she grows bigger, she'll still want to spend lots of time with you: you two will find all kinds of wonderful things to do together.

    At least, until she's a teenager. Then all bets are off ;)
  • jezebeldelilahjezebeldelilah
    Posts: 337Member
    Thanks, after delivering her my body went crazy. I couldn't walk or barely hold her and no doctors had any answers. I am so grateful to be able to move again even If only temporary. I will always hope for permanently being able to walk and have use of my limbs. I went into the hospital to deliver her healthy and a week later I was using a walker.
  • BellaBefanaBellaBefana
    Posts: 8,720Member
    @chlomom:  may I ask what your diagnosis is?
    Bite me, cupcake!
  • jezebeldelilahjezebeldelilah
    Posts: 337Member
    Well I think that they don't know. They say that I have a rare form of MS. That attacks rapidly and symptoms occur suddenly. Devics syndrome is a term often used. That the trauma of natural labor is what caused it to become active. The nurse dislocated my hip during delivery cause she was a worthless bitch. My placenta didn't properly detach so instead of telling me what was going on she ripped my leg back in a very unnatural way and it popped out of socket. My daughter is the best gift I have ever received and I feel bad that I am so sick. I just want her to have the best life possible and I feel guilty due to my limitations. Sorry now I'm venting...
  • BellaBefanaBellaBefana
    Posts: 8,720Member
    no worries...I'd be pissed too!  do you have a medical school near you?  sometimes those are the best places to go when you have something weird or rare.

    Do not feel bad that you're sick!  Yes you have limitations, but you know what?  That's NOT what she'll remember about you!  She'll remember how much you loved her, how hard you tried, and that even though you may not have been able to go out and kick a ball with her, you read to her, cuddled her, loved her.
    Bite me, cupcake!
  • meandmy243meandmy243
    Posts: 6,647Member
    yes your child will get sick.. take your child somewhere and exposing her to germs that she is not used to for long amounts of time she will get sick,, its called building immunity.. lol

    i spent 8 years of my life as a daycare provider. its a great place and its a horrible place. your kid will love the interaction and the exposure to things like paint glue glitter and all that fun stuff you dont want in spilled in your carpet. she will learn how to interact with kids learn how to fight how to play and how to get along... she will pick up bad habits but gain good ones... its all about where you put her and how you take it. you dont like it she wont either...
    mom of wild children
    going to the chapel 7/5/2014
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