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Can't stand DH any more.
  • OxiMOMOxiMOM
    Posts: 3,028Member
    Dh is being such a fucking dick lately. We are still waiting on my car to be fixed. (will be done today or tomorrow) I wanted to walk to the store about a mile away this am and he refuses to let me go. We can walk as a family but never me alone. He went and bitched the whole time he was getting ready about having to walk in the rain. I told him to stop bitching or let me walk. He said I can't go because I'll get picked up and kidnapped. First off the whole walk there is in a very nice quiet resedential area not the ghetto. And okay yes someone did get there head bashed in with a brick on our corner last week but that was at 5:am. Dh seems to forget that I'm not a helpless chick like all his ex's. I have lived alone before, I have traveled alone many times. Crap my mom let me wander cities in foreign countries alone at 15. A 1 mile walk to the store and 1 back is not a huge deal. Where did my independence go????? Dh applied for the railroad good pay good ins good retirement. But it's long hours and he will have to leave for 3 weeks to train if the hire him. I'm thinking he is gonna pass up a good job because he won't want to leave me. Ughhh. My car really needs to be done today. Also his pension was scheduled to come today. Can't wait for that tantrum when he gets home
  • episcopal
    Posts: 1,401Member
    It sounds to me like his being gone for training and working long hours is going to do both of you some good.  Has he always been like this or has this recently started?
  • MistressHeidiMistressHeidi
    Posts: 973Member
    ^^^^I was wondering the same thing. If it's a recent thing I'm thinking he's just feeling like life is so out of control right now, not having a job, money troubles, the car breaking down, his pension being late, all those things he can't control, so maybe latching on to the few things he can control makes him feel more stable and less afraid.

    Either way, it would be annoying. I'll keep my fingers crossed that he finds a job real soon, and that your car is done today instead of tomorrow! Big big hugs!
  • OxiMOMOxiMOM
    Posts: 3,028Member
    It's an on and off thing. When we first started dating he was this. Way then calmed down. Then again when we had little man and now again. I know he worries and it's nice to have someone worry sometimes But I also miss doing me. I hope my car is done today as well but we won't have any way to get it lol damn shop being 45 min away.
  • gamommiegamommie
    Posts: 348Member
    Umm mine did/does the same thing. My heart goes out to you. I have not been able to totally break him from the habit but I have been able to get him to back off some. I told him that I know he loves me and that he wants me safe but that there are things that I have to do in order to run his house for him and it's not always feasible or necessary for him to come with me. (baby I don't want to run to the store when you come home I want to go before you come home so we can spend time together!) I also told him he could protect me better than anyone else blah blah blah. (Baby show me how to protect myself) He showed me some self defense moves that are amazing bought me a knife and a gun...and now I go alone. In peace. Maybe you could try asking him to show you some stuff. Even if you already know it. They really just want to feel like he-men...even if they aren't. And sometimes a little ego stroking works wonders...maybe? Hopefully this will help and I won't sound like a raging crazy...
  • MistressHeidiMistressHeidi
    Posts: 973Member
    I guess walking to the shop to get the car is out of the question. LOL  Sorry, just had to try and make a joke. That's a tough one. 45 minutes away is not exactly right around the corner. Still hope your car is done today. And now I'm keeping my fingers crossed that some nice neighbor or friend can drive you to get your car.
  • shadylaneshadylane
    Posts: 3,037Member
    He really believes u will get kidnapped? I mean its possible but highly unlikely. I agree he just wants to be in control. He can't refuse to let u go, is he going to physically restrain u? But I guess u have to pick ur battles. Hopefully u car is done today
    ~slim shady~
  • OxiMOMOxiMOM
    Posts: 3,028Member
    Me getting hurt or abducted is not TOTALLY out of the question. We live on a busy street, behind us it's very nice residential quiet, safe. To the right of us down two blocks it gets shady. They shut down some projects a town over a few years ago now they are building section 8 town homes very nice houses not great tenants. To the left of us down a few blocks there is a trailer park with lots of drama. Our block is nice and fairly safe. The brick incident was from kids who lived down in the town homes. So it's safeish. I mean we have no issues but it could happen. Dh said last night if he takes this job he is getting me a gun.
  • episcopal
    Posts: 1,401Member
    Since this has been going off and on for quite some time, I would suggest counseling for one or both of you.  Would be be open to that?
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