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Tough Love. AKA: Rules to Live By
  • AnonUser26
    Posts: 1,144Guest
    I'm not a hugger.  I don't sugar coat.  Here is some real life advice we all need to hear at one time or another, I've given it out many times.  And I'm doing it again here.

    Take responsibility for yourself and your actions.

    Stop making excuses.

    If you make a mistake, own up to it.

    Stop blaming other people for shortcomings based on decisions you've made.

    Stop antagonizing other people.

    People
    only treat you like shit because by doing nothing and saying nothing,
    you are giving them permission to continue. Stand up for yourself.

    Stop causing drama and then complaining about drama. You asked for it.

    If
    you hate your situation do something about it. Change the thinking
    that got you into this situation in the first place. The same mindset
    will not get you out of it.

    If you can't afford something, don't buy it.

    Don't
    hate other people because they have more than you do. You don't know
    their situation, you don't know how hard they had to work to get where
    they are.

    Stop whining. Suck it up.

    If you're gay, be fucking gay. Rock that shit. Stop hiding.

    Putting yourself down only gives other people permission to do the SAME DAMN THING.

    If
    he hits you, cheats on you, lies to you, completely disrespects you,
    leave him. Stop making excuses for him. You aren't doing yourself, or
    your children, any favors. You are teaching your daughters that it's OK
    to be abused doormats and your sons to treat women JUST LIKE HE TREATS
    YOU. Is that what you want?

    You don't have to have everything
    everyone else has. She has the newest iPhone or Prada bag (and a
    Master's degree in Finance?)? Good for her. If you have a Wal-Mart
    budget, that's what you have. Don't begrudge other people. Is your
    self confidence really that low that you have to have everything
    everyone else does?

    Bad things happen to everyone. You are not that special. Get over it.

    Being a victim isn't a career.
  • AnonUser27
    Posts: 1,742Guest
    Fuck yeah! This is the best post in the history of SM.
  • AnonUser25
    Posts: 547Guest
    MassHysteria said:

    Fuck yeah! This is the best post in the history of SM.




    Agreed! :)
  • OpheliaOphelia
    Posts: 3,318Member
    Standing ovation complete with the slow clap from me.
    Nothing left to do but smile, smile, smile.. -Grateful Dead<3
  • fatchickonabikefatchickonabike
    Posts: 5,491Member
    Taking notes for future conversations with DD. The first item especially!
    "The most essential gift for a good writer is a built-in, shock-proof bullshit detector.” - Ernest Hemingway
  • AnonUser27
    Posts: 1,742Guest
    =D>
  • AnonUser26
    Posts: 1,144Guest
    This isn't for our children, honestly.  It is for US.  EVERYONE.  As human beings inhabiting this floating rock, these are the rules we should ALL live by.
  • mama2tutnkcmama2tutnkc
    Posts: 1,039Member
    CAN I GET AN AMEN for @FinallyFree2bMe?!? 8-X =D>
    feels like *home* to me
  • mama2tutnkcmama2tutnkc
    Posts: 1,039Member
    Oops.. my fat thumb hit that skull face lol. It was supposed to be this =D>
    feels like *home* to me
  • AnonUser26
    Posts: 1,144Guest
    The skull face rocks.  Thanks!
  • pdxmama
    Posts: 1,470Member
    =D> =D> =D> \m/

    Did you ever know that you're my hero,
    You're everything I wish I could be...

    Sorry, I had a Better Midler moment. I love you. That is all.
  • AnonUser26
    Posts: 1,144Guest
    @pdxmama As I love you! 
  • AnonUser28
    Posts: 2,083Guest
    I am deleting all my content.
  • nessamommynessamommy
    Posts: 671Member
    Love this! All true!
    If life gives you lemons, squirt lemon juice in life's eye!
  • same_as_you
    Posts: 2Member
    Love it! Spent the first part of my life being a victim, realized i'll ge
    t nowhere living life like that. Everyday I try to remind myself to live by rules like these and have grown by leaps and bounds. You rock!
  • AnonUser26
    Posts: 1,144Guest
    Thank ya!!
  • sunnymommasunnymomma
    Posts: 2,243Member
    thats going on my fridge!!!
    “There are two basic motivating forces: fear and love. When we are afraid, we pull back from life. When we are in love, we open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement, and acceptance. We need to learn to love ourselves first, in all our glory and our imperfections. If we cannot love ourselves, we cannot fully open to our ability to love others or our potential to create. Evolution and all hopes for a better world rest in the fearlessness and open-hearted vision of people who embrace life.”
    ― John Lennon
  • blkrosemommablkrosemomma
    Posts: 296Member
    OMG You preach it girlfriend!!!! The victim role is getting freaking old!!
  • AnonUser26
    Posts: 1,144Guest
    Exactly.
  • fatchickonabikefatchickonabike
    Posts: 5,491Member
    Oh, I realize they're for everyone, not just kids. I'm taking notes for everyone else I encounter, too!
    "The most essential gift for a good writer is a built-in, shock-proof bullshit detector.” - Ernest Hemingway
  • AnonUser33
    Posts: 743Guest
    FinallyFree2BMe said:

    If you can't afford something, don't buy it.

    If you're gay, be fucking gay. Rock that shit. Stop hiding.

    If
    he hits you, cheats on you, lies to you, completely disrespects you,
    leave him. Stop making excuses for him. You aren't doing yourself, or
    your children, any favors. You are teaching your daughters that it's OK
    to be abused doormats and your sons to treat women JUST LIKE HE TREATS
    YOU. Is that what you want?





    The first one gets me in so much damn trouble. GRR. We have bought gas and food on credit cards a few too many times now we are paying for it.

    The second, I want to put it on a shirt and wear it every day. People need to give less credit to other peoples feelings and more credit to their own on this one for sure.

    The third.. well its my favorite. I wish women would learn this already. I get so sick of hearing what a piece of shit some man is and the next minute she is so in love with him again. It is a quick way for me lose all respect for someone. After the second or third time do not come to me looking for sympathy because there won't be any. 

  • AnonUser26
    Posts: 1,144Guest
    I'm very tired of people making excuses for their fucked up behavior, all the while expecting sympathy from the masses. Going into debit to make a better life for yourself (i.e. College tuition) is one thing. Going into debit so you can show off how great your life is? You fucking deserve it.

    I had to learn a lot of these lessons before and during my divorce. It wasn't easy, but damn if I'm not a better (and much happier) person for it. And, I also learned something: if I followed my heart, used my brain, stopped stomping my feet and throwing a fit every time something went wrong or if I didn't get what I wanted, LIFE WAS SO MUCH EASIER. I could breathe, things started going right, I wasn't constantly stressed.

    Two others that I could add to this list: Making fun of other people doesn't make you awesome, it makes you a fucking tool.

    If someone in your life is constantly dragging you down, let them go. They will suck out your soul and leave you a shell of a person. They can be family, friends, a lover, a husband. I promise you'll feel better once they've gone, and the guilt, no matter what you think, will not eat you alive.

  • AnonUser28
    Posts: 2,083Guest
    I am deleting all my content.
  • AnonUser26
    Posts: 1,144Guest
    Funny, I don't EVER want to grow up. When I'm 80, I want to be planning my next tattoo while I'm smoking cigarettes, clipping coupons, driving an antique sports car, making people laugh, gardening, baking, driving Professor crazy while chasing him around the bedroom.

    Life is too damn short to live in misery.
  • KindredSpiritKindredSpirit
    Posts: 184Member
    Love love love!
  • anonymommy
    Posts: 1,413Member

    =D>
  • OpheliaOphelia
    Posts: 3,318Member
    I am officially in love with you @finallyfree2beme
    Nothing left to do but smile, smile, smile.. -Grateful Dead<3
  • WildandFree
    Posts: 1,593Member
    A fucking men!!!!!
  • Samantha
    Posts: 72Member

    This. Is. Awesome.

    You are my new favorite person.

  • [Deleted User]
    Posts: 2,528
    Preach it, sister.
    Get me a damn beer.
  • AnonUser26
    Posts: 1,144Guest
    Awwwww! Feeling the love today!
  • pdxmama
    Posts: 1,470Member
    Love from many and one serial snarky hugger,
    meh. Everything you said was true, and if it hurts anyone's feelings it could be bc it's exactly what they need to hear.
  • AnonUser28
    Posts: 2,083Guest
    I am deleting all my content.
  • AnonUser26
    Posts: 1,144Guest
    Wow, didn't even notice! Fuck em, my life is a fairy tale, too bad theirs is so pathetic they have to hide behind an anonymous hug button on a website. Excuse me, I have six feet worth of gorgeous millionaire to tackle as soon as he walks in the door.
  • Rosie08
    Posts: 494Member
    I'm just repeating everyone but I loved this post. And those huggers...sigh.
  • Rosie08
    Posts: 494Member
    @finallyfree2BMe, hah, I agree. I always get the snarky hugs and lols. I think you're pretty amazing.
  • AnonUser27
    Posts: 1,742Guest
    You mean they are not genuine hugs?! Well that's just the silliest thing I have ever heard! ;)
  • pdxmama
    Posts: 1,470Member
    I know @masshysteria it's absolutely shocking isn't it!
  • AnonUser26
    Posts: 1,144Guest
    Thanks to all the GENUINE people here!! Maybe some people need to recognize that they need to evaluate where their life is headed. Excuse me, I have to celebrate!!!
  • [Deleted User]
    Posts: 2,528
    Serial hugger is sitting in their momma's basement, pantsless, scratching their vagina and/or ball sack, cursing you all for agreeing that they need to own up to their poor life decisions.
    Snarky huggers gon' hug, y'all.
    Get me a damn beer.
  • PurpleFlowersPurpleFlowers
    Posts: 5,627Member
    That was fucking awesome. Some applied to me and I am grateful that you actually had the balls to tell it like it is! ^:)^
    Stay away from my chocolate and nobody gets hurt!

    I think I like who I am becoming...
  • irishchyld65
    Posts: 12Member
    amen... enough said
  • pdxmama
    Posts: 1,470Member
    @notsohotmomma you rock chica! Snarky huggers gon' hug. Hahahaha. They can hug my big fat ass, everything she said is still gon' be true.
  • AnonUser26
    Posts: 1,144Guest
    Haters gonna hate, huggers gonna hug. Any one else think of Dave Chapelle???
  • WildandFree
    Posts: 1,593Member
    Who the heck would have a problem with this post?! I bet someone who had a husband that treats them like shit but doesn't have the cahones to leave em ;)
  • AnonUser33
    Posts: 743Guest
    MellowYellow said:

    Who the heck would have a problem with this post?! I bet someone who had a husband that treats them like shit but doesn't have the cahones to leave em ;)



    ^^YES
  • undercoverbanana
    Posts: 7,722Member
    I agree with your advice, but sometimes it is a process. Don't forget that things can't be fixed in one fell swoop. And sometimes those people need a little support along the way. Getting from A to B takes a little while.
    i'm nekkid.
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