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Baby Getting Clingy at Night
  • beachmommybeachmommy
    Posts: 2,477Member

    I am not really sure how to frame this question without sounding like I am complaining, but here goes:

    My DS6mo has started to CRY when I put him down in his crib at night.  I know...all babies do this...but he never really did the full-on temper tantrum crying bit.  And now he is doing this every night, for the first hour or so I am putting him down.

    I cuddle him until he is relaxed and either sleeping or near sleeping, I put him down with his "snuggle buddy", he curls up into a ball in his side and breathes a huge "sigh..." I quietly creep out of his room...shut the door...climb into my bed...then "WWWWAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH" like someone is frickin beating him with a stick!

    I remember reading a while back on another board a mom posted something about babies at 6 months learning the concept of "distance" and understanding now when you leave the room... I don't remember enough of the details, but was wondering if anyone here is going through this?

    My beach is still Sandy....
  • MorganD
    Posts: 3,456Member
    Kids around that age start having separation anxiety. It's pretty normal. I let my kids cry it out. Eventually the got adjusted to being put down after dark, and just laid down and went to sleep. Good luck with your little man!
  • GritsGrits
    Posts: 3,749Member
    My DS is not quite 6 months old, so I can't speak from recent experience. But I do know that with both my girls, that was about the age when I started to employ the little music boxes with lights strapped to the crib rails. Full disclosure though: Contrary to popular opinion, I rocked both my girls until they were fully asleep until they were at least a year old. With DD8, I rocked her until she no longer fit comfortably in the rocker--about 2.5 (Gimme a break--she was my first!). I remember DD3 having some issues with separation around that time.

    Is it possible to leave the door open a little? Maybe the click of the door closing is just enough to wake him and that's when he realizes he's alone. With DS, I have to put him down and then I hold the sides of his blankie to the crib so that there's a little weight on the blanket. I stand like that for just a minute or so, long enough for him to fall back into a deeper sleep. He always wakes a little when I start to lay him down.
    "I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day, and I believe in miracles." ~Audrey Hepburn
  • beachmommybeachmommy
    Posts: 2,477Member

    @grits - I put that music box that straps to the side of his crib in, but I disabled it 2 days later bc he kept kicking it in his sleep and setting off the box which would wake him up.  I will turn it back on though -that's a good idea.

    I did try leaving his door open a bit to avoid the closing sound, but I think the sound of me getting into my bed does the same thing.  Guess that's a sign to lose some weight?

    My beach is still Sandy....
  • momofdbbmomofdbb
    Posts: 9,031Member
    One thing you can try is wearing a light t shirt for a while and then putting it in bed with him. Or something like a bandana if your worried about putting a larger cloth in with him. Something that smells like you. If you wear a certain sent put some on a corner of the bed so he can smell it. I would take my shirt off and let them sleep with it like a sheet sometimes.
    " Wibbly wobbly timey wimey ......." The Doctor
    " I'm a leafe on the wind..watch how I soar ." Wash :((
    " Oh the wall had it comming.' Sherlock Holmes
    yea I am geek !!
  • beachmommybeachmommy
    Posts: 2,477Member
    thanks @momofdbb - that is a really good idea.  I am going to try it tonight!
    My beach is still Sandy....
  • momofdbbmomofdbb
    Posts: 9,031Member
    Your welcome. Of course I have to admit I still sing my 4 year old to sleep some nights. Lol. And he sleeps in my bed!! I sang DD to sleep when she 7! Now I can't sing Somewhere over the rainbow without losing it.
    " Wibbly wobbly timey wimey ......." The Doctor
    " I'm a leafe on the wind..watch how I soar ." Wash :((
    " Oh the wall had it comming.' Sherlock Holmes
    yea I am geek !!
  • fantasticalmamafantasticalmama
    Posts: 139Member
    Have you tried something that makes white noise? That helped us out alot. Dd would wake up at the drop of a pin.
  • beachmommybeachmommy
    Posts: 2,477Member

    @momofdbb - i sing my baby "you are my sunshine" and the 2nd verse is

    "The other night dear
    As I lay sleeping
    I dreamed I held you in my arms

    When I awoke dear
    I was mistaken
    And I held
    My head
    And
    cried"

    This always makes me tear up bc we almost lost him at 8 mo pregnant due to appendicitis and then again at delivery due to complications.

    @fantasticalmama - I do put the air conditioner on which makes a white-noisish sound, but maybe I would have better luck with one of those machines

    My beach is still Sandy....
  • momofdbbmomofdbb
    Posts: 9,031Member
    @beachmommy I have had that dream before , I dreamed I was holding DD and I could still feel the weight of her body when I woke up but she is gone. I did cry. DS 12 was clingy for about 3 months after the accident . I just let him sleep in bed with me and DS 4 . None of us was actually getting much sleep , but being close helped.
    " Wibbly wobbly timey wimey ......." The Doctor
    " I'm a leafe on the wind..watch how I soar ." Wash :((
    " Oh the wall had it comming.' Sherlock Holmes
    yea I am geek !!
  • beachmommybeachmommy
    Posts: 2,477Member
    @momofdbb - I am so sorry.  I will sing DS his song tonight in your honor.  You sound like you have a wonderful family. 
    My beach is still Sandy....
  • AllOrNothingAllOrNothing
    Posts: 135Member
    @beachmommy, I am in EXACTLY the same situation right now with my DS 6 mos. this past week has been horrendous. At my wits's end, I am not used to him crying, he's a super happy boy. Until now he'd happily go off to sleep on his own, something his big brothers NEVER did. Now, as soon as his back hits t he crib, eyes fly open and the wailing begins. I even lean in over him cradling him, keeping one hand on his chest, to no avail. He's not happy until I pick him back up. It's been really warm here, and he is teething, so that might be contributing. Never thought of separation anxiety being a factor. Arggggh. I am watching this thread!!
  • AllOrNothingAllOrNothing
    Posts: 135Member
    @momofdbb and @fantasticalmama I just put my LO down in his dark room with a noisy fan, covered in my t-shirt. He didn't stir. I hope I hope I hope it sticks! Thanks for sharing your wisdom. And good luck @beachmommy!
  • beachmommybeachmommy
    Posts: 2,477Member
    @allornothing - just got back from the dr from his 6 mo check up. Turns out he had a mild case of hand foot mouth disease. And there I was saying he was clingy.

    I feel like the worst mom in the world.
    My beach is still Sandy....
  • fantasticalmamafantasticalmama
    Posts: 139Member
    @beachmommy that by no means makes you the worst mom in the world.
  • Monkeynmoo
    Posts: 1,425Guest
    Dd is almost 7 months and she is doing the same thing when she is tired too. We just let her snuggle on the couch with us until she gives us "the look" then take her to bed and put her down. We did find this leap frog dog that sings lullabys for 10 or 20 minutes... I will post a pic, it's nice because of she hits it at night it's not loud enough to wake her. It's not a complete pic but enough to find it and we love it!

    Http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=4137185384021&l=3153867dd7
  • beachmommybeachmommy
    Posts: 2,477Member
    Thanks @fantasticalmama - but it is so hard not to feel like a bad mom when this is the first time he was ever sick, and I didn't even know it.  It makes me feel like a failure. 
    My beach is still Sandy....
  • toadintheholetoadinthehole
    Posts: 1,009Member
    @beachmommy my DS is 2.5yo, gets clingy when he's about to be ill and i STILL forget this until his illness finally makes an appearance then i feel like shit for being impatient and annoyed with him. Please dont feel bad and you are far from a failure. a failure and bad mum would not have posted here asking for advice!
  • AllOrNothingAllOrNothing
    Posts: 135Member
    @beachmommy Ahh, poor thing <---------you, I mean! Baby will be fine, at least you know what's going on! Hope he feels better soon. I am the same <a href="/message-board/index.php?p=/profile/toadinthehole">@toadinthehole. Finally have it pegged now in DS8 and 6, still haven't figured out our littlest babe yet. And i always feel like such a turd after.
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