What they do right
  • undercoverbanana
    Posts: 12,609Member
    Our dhs and so's piss us off, stress us out, make us want to bludgeon them sometimes. What do they do right?
    Even if it took them too damn long to figure it out? mine can change brake pads, a clogged sink, bake a cake, paint, remodel, do tile,, and has finally figured out that ignoring special days are expensive...and so is cheaping out and buying some fucking random stupid thing at the last minute. And that sugar works better than vinegar with flies, and kids. and mostly, I may want to strangle him, but during a real emergency, I can count on him. Even if he bitches about it later.
    i'm nekkid.
  • undercoverbanana
    Posts: 12,609Member
    Oh, and he thinks it's funny when I strip in the backyard and shoot my panties over the fence like a slingshot.
    i'm nekkid.
  • 123
    Posts: 1,513Member
    When he's not busy being an asshat of epic proportions, he is generous and tries his best to do things he think will make me happy and he has moments where he is truly a great father
    dont mistake my kindness for weakness
  • SalllyWingo
    Posts: 1,557Member
    He's an excellent ManBitch.
  • RuralRebellionRuralRebellion
    Posts: 2,817Member
    My DH can cook.  And thank god for that, because I can't.

    He also remains calm when we argue or I am stressed/worried.  Which is a blessing in disguise, because in the heat of the moment, to me it seems like he doesn't care enough.  But he always says "what good would it do if I was flipping out like you?"  And that's a damn good point.

    Oh, and he does the dishes.
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Most everyone's mad here. You may notice that I'm not all there myself.
  • VegantasticVegantastic
    Posts: 4,225Member
    My hub puts me first, always. He always considers my feelings and opinions, without fail. He is respectful and honest (almost to a fault lol) and the funniest man I've ever met in my life. He can make me laugh when I'm at my lowest, and he always has my back. He takes the idea of "partners in marriage" very seriously. He is all around FANTABULOUS!!!
    "Be the change you wish to see in the world"
    "Don't Panic"
  • undercoverbanana
    Posts: 12,609Member
    mine is looking on the internet on how to d.i.y. Another hand shaped cookie cutter because some asshole child jacked mine.
    i'm nekkid.
  • Justthemom
    Posts: 56Member
    My dh works very hard long hours so that I can stay home with the kidros. He can also fix things (when he wants to), stays calm while I freak the fuck out, and when I want to do something spur of the moment he rolls with it.
  • Dragonbabyx3Dragonbabyx3
    Posts: 1,467Member
    My SO is amazing- even if we don't always agree on things.  We have been together over a year and havent had a "real" arguement.. (knocking on wood) He manages to stay calm even when I am flipping out, he cleans the house, does the dishes, sweeps, his cooking is amazinggggg and is generally a great guy.  He is awesome with my kids. I would like more romance... but hey, I can't have everything!
  • DemandaDemanda
    Posts: 5,920Member
    He's an excellent nurse. I was sick with a cold for a week and still dealing with this fucking rash. He's been sweet and helpful.
    He's reliable. I complain about him being late all the time, which he is, but he would never let us down when it really mattered. He works his ass off, is always there for us, spends time with us, and is always planning stuff for us to do...both as a family and a couple. He can make me laugh like no one else. He loves my son like his own and he takes care of the kids and the house when I'm swamped with school. He doesn't wear stupid shoes and he's an incredible lay.
    "The truth will set you free. But first, it will piss you off." ~ Gloria SteinemPhotobucket
  • KrabbyKay
    Posts: 5,914Member
    @undercoverbanana you do NOT...do you??? Shoot your panties over the fence??? That's HILAROUS.
    Ok, so he's great with the kids, because he stays home on the weekends with them while I work. And he can fix shit. All kinds of shit.
  • undercoverbanana
    Posts: 12,609Member
    Um...not very often....
    i'm nekkid.
  • MegsueMegsue
    Posts: 1,846Member
    Why'd you have to ask this on a night when I'm firing up the wood chipper and busying myself digging a shallow grave for him? :-$

    Alright, I did fall in love with him for a reason...

    He's a great father (when he's awake). He tries REALLY hard to make up for all of his fuck ups. He does dishes (sometimes), he does laundry (sometimes), he's a good cook (always), he buys me flowers at random, he gives really good hugs, he's pretty good a reading my mind (I know! Right?!?) He rocks my world, he works his ass off, he makes me laugh, he is sooooo much fun to hang out with, he knows how to fix everything in the house (the electronics, vehicles and boats are my territory),

    *right now, I shit you not, I just looked over at him to try to think of more wonderful things about him...he's picking is nose in his sleep. Fuck that I'm done
  • momoffiveteensmomoffiveteens
    Posts: 399Member
    mine is awesome he does all of the cooking in the house, I just do the occasional baking. He does any car repairs even if they take 3 or 4 days lol. He puts up with me which some days is huge. He is an awesome husband and father and grandpa. He can fix anything that goes wrong in the house except electrical. He lotions and rubs my feet for me when ever I need it. He works at a high school with 1,251 lovely 9 - 12 graders and yet on weekends he will help play host to as many as 5 extras teenagers. He donates plasma twice a week in order to buy extra things generally something a kids needs like shoes, etc. 
  • SpringSpring
    Posts: 2,084Member
    He's amazingly smart though he hides it well. He can fix all of our computers, rig all of our electronics to sync with one another and makes my technological life unbelievably easy. Right now I'm about to turn on our built in speakers to play Christmas music. With my phone. In only two rooms. Without him I'd have a CD player.
    @ruralrebellion ill trade you! Mine over worries and gets easily upset with me. I need him to soothe me! He doesn't.
    "Sometimes I question my sanity. Sometimes it replies."
  • undercoverbanana
    Posts: 12,609Member
    Forget the wood chipper until you think of a decent alibi. You picked him out for a reason. And....probably....the only reason he is alive is probably that reason.....ok.....i know how you feel...use that control freak tendency to buy you some time. When I want a break, I attempt a small household repair, he decides I am doing it wrong, and starts from scratch...and I go the other way. Mine put a booger in the ashtray while I was smoking the other night. Not kidding. Glad it was outside, but it still grossed me out. I imagined I was burning and indirectly smoking his boogers. I nearly hurled, and bawled him out.
    There has to be a reason you haven't killed him yet. He has to have a redeeming quality. Stop watching him, and think hard.
    i'm nekkid.
  • undercoverbanana
    Posts: 12,609Member
    I was thinking about my precious firstborn...my only son....and wondering how someone so fucking smart who could figure out a way to calculate rent between three people fairly would do it by square footage, and space filled with each persons shit needed to be taught how to wash a truck...... there is a redeeming feature in there somewhere....even for Vulcan children like mine.....but...sometimes I think my dd is half klingon.....
    i'm nekkid.
  • undercoverbanana
    Posts: 12,609Member
    This does not bode well for my son......
    i'm nekkid.
  • RuralRebellionRuralRebellion
    Posts: 2,817Member
    @Spring sorry!  Mine is also incredibly handy and knowledgeable with electronics, so I don't need that feature!
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Most everyone's mad here. You may notice that I'm not all there myself.
  • SpringSpring
    Posts: 2,084Member
    @ruralrebellion, no no I meant the staying calm and mine showing too much empathy cause you worried yours didn't care in an argument and I'd like mine to not care as much. Lol. I was just teasing though. :) I know your husband's way is better. Maybe yours could teach mine? Haha.
    "Sometimes I question my sanity. Sometimes it replies."
  • undercoverbanana
    Posts: 12,609Member
    How about yours teach mine to deal with kids, not be so damn sensitive, and not take two Tylenol p.m.s when he knows it means I will have to sling his arm around my shoulders and carry him to bed like we are two wounded soldiers on a battle field, and mine can teach yours how to fix anything and everything?
    i'm nekkid.
  • MegsueMegsue
    Posts: 1,846Member
    @undercoverbanana I thought you were my alibi ;)

    Nah, we're just having a rough day because we're both too tired. It happens.

    He's extremely affectionate, loyal, compassionate, smart, witty, and sexy. He won't go a single day (no matter how grumpy we are) without telling me he loves me. Everything he ever does is to make me and DS3 happy.

    I DO love him, I just don't like him right now.
  • undercoverbanana
    Posts: 12,609Member
    I dont like mine a lot......but....i still love him. He is not my friend anymore. He pissed me off. He's whiny and melodramatic. His man cold is something equal to the medical bubonic plague. I dont know wtf I am going to do when he has two weeks off. But......i do know.......he can be a total fucking jackass, but he inherited a wife, two step kids, and three cats....and he bitched....but he was a sucker for my kitties. And he appreciated that I sacrificed all to take care of his dad. And I haven't worked for three years. And he doesn't mind working weekends. Whether or not I help him. And he can be gross, disgusting, rude.............but whether it was a wake up call, or anything else, since July, we have maybe had one argument a month, and not a serious one. Before that, it was two or three screaming fights a week. Mainly him. Found a decent counselour....we can afford to go back, but I use those techniques....and a few more I learned as a bartender. If it works on some random plumber, or random, lawyer, it will work on your hubs...
    P.s. We will work on your alibi later. Just get creative with keeping him busy.
    i'm nekkid.
  • undercoverbanana
    Posts: 12,609Member
    Sorry..we cannot afford to go back to counseling...fucking house payment tripled. Take notes. And use them. Don't be afraid to use reverse psychology.
    i'm nekkid.
  • TorturedbyTWINSTorturedbyTWINS
    Posts: 1,543Member
    Hmmm... my DH is a crappy dad sometimes and lacks patience but the good things are great.

    He's is a great hubby.  He is protective and caring and puts the family first.  He believes me without question and trusts me and my opinions.  He desires me all the time... that's awesome to feel wanted.  He is a fantastic cook and fixer of all things household.  He says he's going to do something and then he does it!  He can back a horse trailer into places that needles would feel claustrophobic.  He is super smart and funny.  I find him irresistibly sexy all the time.  He communicates well and knows when I'm going to kill him and fixes it.  He's great at making up and saying sorry when the royal jackass in him rears it's ugly head.  He massages me until I tell him to stop.  He still kisses me passionately and we've been together almost 3 years.  He lets my kitty that he is very allergic to sleep in our bed.  Most importantly though, he lets me stay at home and be a mommy.  That has been one of my lifelong dreams.  He also supported me going to college and graduating when no one else did.  He's changed my life.  Sure, we have no money to speak of and two crazy kids in the smallest house I've ever lived in but I'm the happiest I've ever been.  

    When he helps a bit more with the boys and loses his traditional mindset of woman raise kids and men don't ever change diapers or help clean the house he will be perfect.  He's still in training though.  If he were a horse I'd say he's still a bit green broke.  
  • gramalibbygramalibby
    Posts: 3,744Member
    Mine is the bill payer to beat all he has a budget that would piss off most. I hate it but I don't . We live on SS and a small job he holds , no pensions . We may not eat well or at all but by God in the 8 yrs we been married .....anniversery Dec. 22 have we ever never been late or overdrawn on our bills. He was a teller in a bank for 41 and is such a loveable geek who married a raging 64 yr old hippie. I fought the budget the 1st few years but now enjoy the phone not ringing for payments.just do not like the times we are hungry. I am the queen of finding bargains. He never had kids and cannot understand why I need to get them things occasionally , he is learning about mama lions and thier cubs. In reality my kids do not ask . I just feel the need at times . Nite all Grama is a rambling
  • Marionettevie
    Posts: 2,729Member
    i am so pissed off at him at the moment that the ony thing i can think of is he cooks, and pays rent...other than that he cant do shit right and i hate him for it....and he gave me great FIL and stepMIL
  • MegsueMegsue
    Posts: 1,846Member
    Want to come over @Marionettevie? I have the wood chipper going! I can make the hole I dug a little bigger too. :-$
    Posts: 2,936Member
    You ask this today of all days? The only thing he does right on a regular basis is piss me the fuck off!

    Ok, fine. He does the dishes every night and the laundry every week. He cooks if I'm not home or busy with school work. He changes diapers and realizes that theses are his kids too. He doesn't babysit, he takes care of his kids.

    I know there is more but right now he's a dumbass asshole so I can't think of anything else.
    "Promote what you love instead of bashing what you hate." - UNK
    "The amazing thing about life is that you choose what you allow into it, you choose how things affect you, you choose how you react. Happiness is a choice. Make it." - UNK
    "Tattoos don't define the person, the person defines the tattoos." - Me
    “The pain now is part of the happiness then” – CS Lewis
  • RosamundiRosamundi
    Posts: 1,412Member
    My DH is my best friend and all around favorite person on the planet. We've been through a lot together and there couldn't be a better partner. He always has my back, loves me no matter what and he has never, in almost twelve years, raised his voice during an argument. He is a fantastic provider, makes a killer grilled cheese sandwich, and always lets me have the fluffy pillow and the first shower. Aaaaand he's downright gifted in bed.
  • KacerpieKacerpie
    Posts: 1,119Member
    Even though he stresses about EVERYTHING (like what direction his shit rolls, and how that means we will be broke for the rest of our lives) he knows the second I start to stress, its time to say "It will be ok" and give me a hug, a shoulder to cry on, and make me feel like the most beautiful, most important person in the world.
    "Please don't talk mom... It makes my brain work..."
  • KacerpieKacerpie
    Posts: 1,119Member
    I have to say, I got "into" with DH tonight about stupid financle things, and reading all this makes me realize that he does 95% of it, and even though we might not see eye to eye on some things, at the end of the day he has my back, and I am his world. My happiness (and by default the kiddos) is the only thing that matters. He will do what ever he needs to do to make sure I am ok. Thank you ladies, for making me realize how lucky I am.
    "Please don't talk mom... It makes my brain work..."
  • Marionettevie
    Posts: 2,729Member
    lol @Megsue....unfortunately hes to damn heavy for me to carry because now he is asleep...and if i killed him i would have to work.....and BLAH im not ready to get a real job yet lol!!!
  • episcopal
    Posts: 1,851Member
    May I put one in for my DW?

    We just got done paying an $840 car repair bill.  I noticed the brakes were beginning to grind last week.  I was incredibly busy and could not get to the shop until the other day.  She wasn't thrilled, yet not royally pissed off.  She was as understanding as can be, which I would say describes how she responds to most, if not all, of my fuck-ups.  Hey, we've more than made it for over 25 years.

    God, I love that woman!
  • KellynnKellynn
    Posts: 2,284Member
    I lucked out with my dh, but then again, I waited seven long years after my divorce to remarry. I knew what I wanted, and I was not going to settle because I didn't want to be alone.

    He is so very kind. He has never said anything bad about my weight, looks, or clothes. He compliments me often  He is very neat and tidy, and will do anything I ask. He does not get mad if I don't feel like cooking dinner, even though I am home now. he'll just get a bowl of cereal or heat up some soup. Just very easy going and laid back. He is also very good at compromising. He lets me do whatever I want, and is just is very happy with anything. He has a fantastic job, and is a great provider, who works really hard so we can enjoy the finer things in life. We have a wonderful love life, he is so generous and caring.

    All in all, I thank God every day for finding him!
  • episcopal
    Posts: 1,851Member
    @Kacerpie, are we married?!!!  You and my DW sound very similar.
  • WickedDunkieJunkieWickedDunkieJunkie
    Posts: 8,649Member
    He pisses me off beyond belief...

    But, he can make me laugh like no one else...
    He'll sing & dance in the car like a complete dork with me... (& sometimes I get it on video & text it to people @Megsue)

    He always remembers my medications even when I'm too tired to get out of bed & take them... because he knows I need them.

    He accepted my children as number one in my life... & although he knows I love him completely... he knows he can not come before them in most instances.

    I hate my body... I'm a 36yo woman that gave birth 5 times... & I look it.
    But, he still tells me I'm sexy & beautiful & that no young 20-something/yo girl could ever turn him away from me.
    (Nothing against you 20-something ladies... I mean those air-head, have no kids yet, single, think my 24yo husband could do better, bitches... Ugh)
    We Are The Music Makers... And We Are The Dreamers Of Dreams...

  • tothemoonandbacktothemoonandback
    Posts: 3,934Member
    I remind my DH often of the things he doesn't do.. he reminds me often of the things he does do.. and I agree, he does a lot.  Taking out trash, picking up poop.  I haven't put gas in my own vehicle in the 10 years I've been with him.  Weekly (or more often) impromptu flowers.  Household maintenance, yard maintenance, vehicle maintenance.  He turns on my electric blanket every night before I go to bed so it's warm, starts my car every morning.  Takes care of all the bills, manages our savings/checking/retirement plans/life insurance/auto/homeinsurance.  He constantly tells me that I'm beautiful, occasionally that I'm "hot", no matter what I've looked like, what I've weighed, or how I've acted, he's never said otherwise.  Holy shit he does do a lot now that I type it all out!
    Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius, and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring. - Marilyn Monroe
  • Manders15Manders15
    Posts: 3,423Member
    My SO understands if I'm not up to cooking, even if he is tired too & will make himself soup & try to feed me as well.  He understands when I get into a funk & just holds me, doesn't try to talk me out of it or walk away from me.  He (eventually) does the chores I ask him to do but will unload the dishwasher before I even remember.  He always reaches out to cuddle me when I go to bed after him, even if he's asleep.  :x
  • WillileeWillilee
    Posts: 1,621Member
    My DH definitely got the short end of the stick. We have our issues, but not many and not earth-shattering. He's a little too laid back for my taste and I am a little too fuckin wacko for his, but it evens out nicely. I about love him to death and he makes me laugh all the time. When I travel for work, I always wish he was with me. He cooks and sometimes cleans (but god forbid he clean the damn bathroom) and does random sweet things for me. No matter how pissed off we are, he always tucks me in at night and we say "I love you". I definitely scored. Him, not so much.
  • Thorne
    Posts: 54Member
    My dh wont just do something bc it needs to be done...but he Always Always does what I ask of him..and he asks all of the time what he can do to help me. He is a libra, so he is all about fairness; he is hands on with our son, he still opens car doors for me and he thanks me often for marrying him. He stays calm in the face of my mood swings..he would never hit me..and so much more. ..

    Hes not perfect, obviously. But neither am I. I am really enjoying our marriage because I feel we are on the same level and we are growing together.
    There is no agony like bearing an untold story inside of you. – Maya Angelou.

    If you have only one smile in you, give it to the people you love. Don’t be surly at home, then go out in the street and start grinning ‘Good morning’ at total strangers. – Maya Angelou.
  • meandmy243meandmy243
    Posts: 9,474Member
    Mine makes me laugh, he encourages me to try new things, doesnt rub my nose in when i fail. hes fun and brings out my carefreeness i put away when i had ds#1. hes sincere and treats my son as his own. he doesnt mind my crazyness and my hyperactive turd. calms me down and pumps me up. and has the ability to drive me insane in less than 2seconds but he makes me happy. he has my back.
    let them eat cake! because id rather have pie!!!
  • mamafinmamafin
    Posts: 892Member
    SO makes me tea and brings it to bed for me. He cooks almost every day. He cleans and can fix almost anything. He reads bedtime story for DS2 every night. He lets me sleep late on the weekend mornigs. When I'm sick he takes super good care of me and he almost never has the man flu. He gives me the bigger portion of ice cream and never eats my candy.
    Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers
  • mamafinmamafin
    Posts: 892Member
    Oh, and he NEVER yells at me!
    Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers
  • MorganD
    Posts: 3,436Member
    My man can cook really well. I don't really like cooking every night, so it's awesome. He's a great dad to our son, and my two boys. He's very health-aware when it comes to what they eat. Good thing, because I would give them hotdogs and mac-n-cheese every night if they would just EAT something!! He's a super romantic, but it only shows now and then. He puts me first in bed, every time. He puts up with my family once or twice a year. He's the most hard-working man I've ever met, second only to my dad. And sometimes...just every once in a while...he gives me a look. It's not just any look. It's a look that says he loves me. It says I'm beautiful and that he doesn't see anyone else. It's a look that says he's lost in me...just like I'm lost in him. :)
  • supamomma
    Posts: 3Member
    My DH can get on my friggin nerves sometimes that I just need to leave the house or I'll throw him out. But...he can cook better than me, he can fix things, has a green thumb, a great father to our ds1 and gives super duper massages. He can be really sweet and considerate at times. He is really ticklish which is so entertaining and not selfish in the bedroom ;-) He is always saying how beautiful and sexy I am even though I look like a whale since I'm pregnant with twins. SO I guess his good qualities out way the bad. I love him dearly.
    Greatness lies not in being strong but in the right use of strength.
  • GalFriday
    Posts: 33Member

    He doesn't always get it 'right' but he tries. When we first moved in together, I was decorating the Christmas tree and could not find the little wire hangers for the ornaments. I have a very short fuse, especially when I KNOW I have something and cannot find it. He listened to me rant and rave and get mad about not haivng them. Finally, I just 'gave up'. After a while, he said he had to run some errands. He came back with those little wire hangers. Just sat them on the table. Never said a word.

    He did middle of the night feedings, almost all of them, with our son. He changes diapers, gives baths and is a fun daddy to his boy. he is pretty good about giving me a break away for a while each week. He works hard, very hard, at a job he really doesnt like so I can SAHM. And , when I am totally furious with him, he does something or I find some small thing he has done to make my life easier.

    Asshat! But, he is my asshat, and I love him, for better or worse!


  • SammieSammie
    Posts: 8,345Administrator, Moderator
    For the most part, I can't complain about my spouse. He loves us so much and he does whatever he can to show it. He's an amazing, devoted, loving, involved father. He's a loyal, loving, supportive, doting and helpful spouse. He's such a hard worker and a wonderful provider. He works his ass off for us and never complains. NEVER complains and he has a very stressful, very time consuming job. He pitches in and helps out around the house without complaint and usually I don't even have to ask. He always tells me he loves me, that I'm his best friend, gives me back, foot, neck massages, encourages me to get some rest and take some time alone (especially now that I'm prego). And he's SO excited to be a daddy again to baby #2. The man loves his family, we are his priority and he loves us unconditionally. THAT is what makes me weak in the knees. I love him so much. It's never about him, it is always about us.


  • GirlsOnly
    Posts: 142Member
    Today is the wrooooong fuckin' day for me to try and answer this question, but...

    He's a straight-A grad student. He's a great, if unfulfilled, SAHD to our 2yo twins. He loves my family. He cooks. Sometimes. He tells me I'm pretty, even though I don't believe him. He puts the seat back down, and the TP roll in the correct 'over' position. (Can you tell I'm reaching?)
  • junglezoo
    Posts: 249Member
    I honestly can't think of one good thing. I am envious of y'all.
    I'm going to the zoo zoo zoo. You can come too too too....
  • JustJulia
    Posts: 86Member
    My SO is confusing i think is the word. Would give a stranger the shirt off his back if he thought he needed it.
    Has given lots of stuff away "some expensive brand new stuff" but will not accept anything,
    even help with shifting house, We can do it or it does not get done.
    He is very smart can work out just about anything he puts his mind to, mechanically minded,
    can fix just about anything.
    Just because he can does not mean he will well not until it needs to be done.
    There is a lot more to my SO then anyone realizes, very confusing but i do love him.