I love these ideas, and I'm glad I'm not alone. The problem is me. For instance, I have a severe anxiety disorder so I do not allow my daughter to go over to anyone's house (I don't know anyone anyway). What made this more true was over the summer we had crazy shit happen. Have you guys heard of the Aurora Theater Shooting? Yeah, that was here, that was us. I mean we weren't at the theater, thank God, but that is our favorite theater. What was made worse was that the guy who did it, James Holmes, was my neighbor. Like, we pass his old apartment (the one on the news) every single day. The media frenzy was crazy. It caused my anxiety to worsen because this guy lived just doors down and look how psycho he is! Also, we had to evacuate when they disarmed the booby-trapped apartment.
As if that was not bad enough, a couple weeks later, a psycho neighbor below us, went to the adjacent apartment building and set it on fire. We saw the flames billowing out and heard our nbeighbors screaming. A baby was thrown from the fourth floor, and neighbors had to jump for their lives. Two of my neighbors (an elderly couple) died that night, all of the people lost everything, some were severely hurt from jumping to concrete. We had to evacuate again and stay at a shelter (all of us in the building he stayed in as well as those who were displaced) so that police could surround him and take him into custody. He is still free to this day however.
I say all that to say this; I said above that my anxiet is only part of the problem. I lied. It is my problem and it affects every area of my life. I am afraid to meet people for fear they are crazy, for fear they are evil, for fear they will hurt me or my family, for fear they are just a waste of time. I want to explore hobbies but I'm afraid. I want to step out of my shell, but I'm afraid. I want to work out and lose weight, but I'm scared. Anxiety is the master of my life; I'm even afraid to go to counseling for fear of judgement! OMG. I am sick of it. I want to feel like more than a sahm/student. I even am finishing my degree online from the university, because I am scared!