SCARIES!!!
  • LesboMomLesboMom
    Posts: 3,812Confessional Manager
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    CHOSEN BY YOUR FRIENDLY NEIGHBORHOOD CONFESSIONAL MANAGERS


    These are the cream of the crop out of nearly 3,500 confessions that were posted


    #290264 Sometimes I wish my phone/computer would read confessions to me so I didn't have to stop reading to take a shower or change a diaper etc... Ya know, deal with real life in any way!

    #289866 My kids run everywhere. It bothers me until I see their little friends running. Then my heart swells with joy. My kids run with joy, strength and abandon. Their friends run like grandmas late for bingo.

    #289489 I bought my 9 month old a pair of yoga pants. Apparently neither one of us plans on ever joining polite society again.

    #289113 My 19mo has been whinning all morning! Omg! Either stfu or learn to talk already, I don't know what you want!

    #28892 4 My my daughter is acting up I have told her I'm going to sell her to the gypsies if she doesn't stop...I think I have given her a complex...

    #288613 Sometimes I start huge fights with DH because makeup sex is the best sex...

    #288736 I encouraged my daughter to pee in the bath cause I was too lazy to get her out of the tub and back in.

    #288749 Why, yes, I did just cuss at my 6 month old, but he started it by getting up at 4am for the morning.

    #288414 Mickeys clubhouse is shaped like Mickey. And the main clubhouse is his pants. So every time he has a party and invites his friends he is really inviting them to the party in his pants.

    #288204 I am currently hiding in a closet with half a box of thin mints while my three year old asks where mommy is and my husband keeps calling me. I refuse to answer until the cookies are gone!! I don't share well.

    #288022 I eat ice cream out of coffee mugs so that the kids won't notice and I won't have to share.

    #287847 I bought my dd (12) the HOT BUNZ hair accessory. This thing looks just like a dick! I freak out every time I see it on her dresser or around the house! LOL

    #287736 My boobs are magazine worthy.... Too bad it's National Geographic.

    #287646 I'm really not looking forward to the day when my kids can read the computer screen over my shoulder and find out that my "work" is actually just reading hilarious things with bad words in them.

    #287652 DH put white carpet in our house before DD1 was born and insists on changing her messy clothes after meals to keep the carpets nice. I want to smear puréed carrots into the rug on purpose just to mess with him.



    ***You may have noticed there are more than the normal 10. You guys were funny funny this week and I feel bad for not getting these posted yesterday.***

    confessional-manager

    Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see a shadow. -- Helen Keller
  • momofdbbmomofdbb
    Posts: 10,900Member
    #288414 Mickeys clubhouse is shaped like Mickey. And the main clubhouse is his pants. So every time he has a party and invites his friends he is really inviting them to the party in his pants.



    =)) Party in my pants !!!
    " Wibbly wobbly timey wimey ......." The Doctor
    " I'm a leafe on the wind..watch how I soar ." Wash :((
    " Oh the wall had it comming.' Sherlock Holmes
    yea I am geek !!
  • BookaddictBookaddict
    Posts: 356Member
    Oh carpeting, the most evil invention ever.
    I would be most content if my children grew up to be the kind of people who think decorating consists mostly of building enough bookshelves. ~Anna Quindlen, "Enough Bookshelves," New York Times, 7 August 1991
  • irishlassirishlass
    Posts: 7,057Member
    Grandmas late for bingo made me lol! I feel the same way!
    "Be who you are and say what you feel. Because those who matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter." - Dr. Seuss
  • KeepstaringKeepstaring
    Posts: 2,086Member
    I am so stealing the ice cream in coffee mug idea!
    “Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”
    ― Albert Einstein
  • Moomin
    Posts: 649Member

    I am so stealing the ice cream in coffee mug idea!


    Me too! I actually took the trash out the other day (trash is *not* my job!) just to sneak a candy bar! Lol!
    It's a fez. I wear a fez now. Fezzes are cool.

    I am Loki of Asgard, and I am burdened with glorious purpose.
  • moobear1983
    Posts: 27Member
    Mickey Mouse Clubhouse will never seem the same again...Lol. 
    Everything I know, I learned the hard way.
  • MadHatterMumMadHatterMum
    Posts: 1,492Member

    Mickey Mouse Clubhouse will never seem the same again...Lol. 



    Exactly!!
  • SasafrasSasafras
    Posts: 1,627Member
    Holy crap I made it!
  • KeepstaringKeepstaring
    Posts: 2,086Member
    Sasafras said:

    Holy crap I made it!

     

    Tell us, tell us! Which one?
    “Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”
    ― Albert Einstein
  • ihasafierceihasafierce
    Posts: 288Member
    irishlass said:

    Grandmas late for bingo made me lol! I feel the same way!


    I work in long term care. Grandmas late for bingo are folks with whom I am well acquainted. Do not get between a wheelchair & the doorway to wherever bingo is being played! They might be awkward, but they are deadly!
  • SasafrasSasafras
    Posts: 1,627Member
    @keepstaring it may or may not have been the one where the bath tub was involved. Lol it was a long day.
  • fancyspatulafancyspatula
    Posts: 7Member
    My. Day. Is. Made. I'm in the Scaries!
    If I take myself too seriously, I get bored.
  • TheHeadacheslayer
    Posts: 2,472Member
    OMG I needed this right now....

    THESE were awesomesauce
    #288414 Mickeys clubhouse is shaped like Mickey. And the main clubhouse is his pants. So every time he has a party and invites his friends he is really inviting them to the party in his pants.

    #288204 I am currently hiding in a closet with half a box of thin mints while my three year old asks where mommy is and my husband keeps calling me. I refuse to answer until the cookies are gone!! I don't share well.

    But THIS ONE OMFG I could have written this one!!!!
    #287736 My boobs are magazine worthy.... Too bad it's National Geographic.

    I always say something similar LMFAOPIMP  
    =)) =)) =))
  • Countygrrl81Countygrrl81
    Posts: 1,855Member

    irishlass said:

    Grandmas late for bingo made me lol! I feel the same way!


    I work in long term care. Grandmas late for bingo are folks with whom I am well acquainted. Do not get between a wheelchair & the doorway to wherever bingo is being played! They might be awkward, but they are deadly!

    yess! This is so true. I work in ltc too. They really do this. And if u dont move the first time they will back up and hit u again lol
    -Well behaved women rarely make history
    -Raisin cookies that look like chocolate chip cookies are the main reason I have trust issues.
  • RosamundiRosamundi
    Posts: 1,412Member
    Hanging my head. My kid runs like a bingo-crazed granny. It's true.
  • junglezoo
    Posts: 249Member
    Why are some confession numbers highlighted in red?
    I'm going to the zoo zoo zoo. You can come too too too....
  • LesboMomLesboMom
    Posts: 3,812Confessional Manager
    @junglezoo its just happened

    confessional-manager

    Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see a shadow. -- Helen Keller
  • Ashdawn684Ashdawn684
    Posts: 979Member
    Party at Mickie's!
    ~Live life to the fullest, or die trying~
  • undercoverbanana
    Posts: 12,609Member
    The mom who threatens to sell her kid to the gypsies.....i haven't seen a gypsie my whole life, except on t.v. Wait till you have another one. Then you can threaten buy one, get one free......
    Threatening to sacrificing them at the next full moon works much better. Hugs....but dont do that until they hit their teens. Therapy is expensive.
    i'm nekkid.
  • RuralRebellionRuralRebellion
    Posts: 2,817Member
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    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Most everyone's mad here. You may notice that I'm not all there myself.
  • Anonymous39
    Posts: 172Member
    The ' I am currently hiding in the closet with thin mints' is funny!!
    And because I did it this morning.
    Except it was tagalongs and everybody was sleeping still.. Hehehe...
    It's nunnya... Nunnya yo business..
  • Mojitochick
    Posts: 2Member


    Threatening to sacrificing them at the next full moon works much better. Hugs....but dont do that until they hit their teens. Therapy is expensive.



    Lmao, I have a therapy jar for each of my kids. I place a quarter in it every time I mess with their heads. Sometimes it's worth fifty cents.