Secrets
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    We all have them. What is one secret that nobody knows about you (except for your accomplice, if you have one) that you will take to your grave?
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    i gave my hubby an std when we 1st got together. i was unaware i had one until i went to get checked, after i already slept wit hubby (he was my fwb at the time). it was curable (thankfully) and i got the medicine for him from my dr. but i couldn't come out and tell him cuz he woulda left me. so, i took the pills, ground them up and gave him some "special" ice cream. it worked cuz i went back to the dr. a month later for another check and i was all clear! 10yrs later, we're still all good
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    PP: That really worked? Because most infections need serious, regular doses of medication, not just some ground up in some food.

    If so, you got very, very lucky.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    yep...chlamydia. it was a one time dose of 4 big ass pills(zithromyacin, i think).
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I had a Sugar Daddy. Best year of my life. $1000 a week to meet the guy each Thursday. Sometimes we just met for lunch or shopping, sometimes it was sex. But he was a very interesting older guy, been lots of places, done lots of stuff. His wife knew about me, she'd had a hysterectomy years before and had no interest in sex. She even sent me a gift on my birthday, which was weird. But it was a beautiful necklace. I still wear it sometimes. We quit meeting when he got prostate cancer. I sent his wife a card when he passed, but did not go to the funeral. I was interviewing new Daddies when the love of my life came along - a really poor guy with terrible prospects. I had to get a job when we met to support him because he was a music student. We are happy, but poor, and have three kids now. I would never tell him, he'd be crushed.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    Wow! I wish I had had a sugar daddy before getting married! I would love to have done that. I have love but noo money!!! I wouldn't have told anyone either though. My family would def judge that! Lol. I'll be back later when I can think of my skeleton when the kids leave me alone for more then a minute!
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I didn't find out I was pregnant until I was 2 months gone. I'd never had regular periods and we were using contraception. At around the 3 week mark, I went to a party and did a sh*t load of cocaine. My child was born healthy but was later diagnosed with autism. Even though I didn't know I was pregnant at the time, I will NEVER forgive myself and I will take my shameful secret to the grave.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I masturbated at a really young age and I still feel ashamed about it.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    My loser BIL committed a felony and I anonymously turned him in. Thank God he's back in jail.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I'm sorry 4:39 that you have that weight to carry. ((hugs))
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I posted on the confessions already but for about a year I was a phone sex operator for some side cash. It was mostly funny and you just realize men can't help how horny they are all the time. It must suck! I had fun with it for awhile but I got burnt out. Not really something I could do for a career lol. OOOH aaah oooo /yawn
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    yeah 4:39, what a terrible weight to carry.
    In all likelihood, it had nothing to do with it, lots of moms go all out, even with the hqrder stuff not knowing they are pregnant.
    Maybe sometime you can be kind to yourself and let the blame go. It won't take the autism away. Have you heard of carly fleishman? Shes a teen with autism, severe, when you see the video and then all of a sudden when she was like 11 she ran to a computer and started typing.
    She's been telling the world about what it's like to be autistic, nothings changed on the outside, but it's really incredible what's on the inside of that seemingly vacant stare.
    http://www.ctv.ca/CTVNews/Health/20101126/carlys-blog-101128/
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I gave and received oral sex, and 'humping' with other girls my age since I was 6 years old. At first it was weird, I felt forced, but then no matter where I moved, there was always someone else as eager to experiment as I was.

    /shame
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    i accidentally shit on my husband one time when we were having sex. i felt it warm and wet and just thought it was from my orgasm, but when we got done a few minutes later and turned on the lights, we saw what it really was. i blame him completely cuz we had eaten at red lobster earlier and i told him to leave me alone cuz my stomach felt weird. we laugh about it now, only to each other or course, but damn it was embarassing.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    i once tried to committ suicide by jumping off a bridge.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I smoke pot, ALOT of pot, not in front of children but dh and I just really enjoy it! It's our cocktail! I don't think I will ever stop!
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    All my affairs are my secret from dh... currently might be starting a new one, with a guy i dated in high school who i lost touch with years ago... the old fwb blew me off after he found out he wasn't my only fwb oh well
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    My brother and I used to grind and hump all the time when we were kids. Gag.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I realy dont think I have any "skeletons" Is this a good or bad thing??
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I had an experience with bestiality when I was really young. I feel disgusting and try to convince myself it never happened because I'm so ashamed.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I'm ashamed of many things and I always try to convince myself it never happened. Sometimes I can't even look in the mirror. I can't even write them down because it's admiting to it. All happened when I was little and sexual situations
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I've had "experiments" with animals as well but not sex.. just them eating or licking me... gross i know
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    i was raped when i was 22 but never reported it cuz i was super drunk when it happened and felt it was somewhat my fault for putting myself in the situation.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    i was prescribed adderall a few years ago, but it made me have terrible mood swings when it would wear off. me and hubby "agreed" that i shouldn't take it anymore. i went back, had it adjusted and still take it sometimes, without hubby knowing
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    i smoke weed with my bf almost every weekend.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I had sex with DH while I was on my period and didn't tell him. Once he saw there was blood, and I told him he must have torn something.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I played with my older brother's penis when I was little.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I cheated on DH by kissing and having oral sex with other guys.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I told DH I was on birth control when I got pregnant and I wasn't.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I lied and stole all the time up until I was about 17.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    i took a friend of mine to get an abortion (she needed a ride and no one else was available) even though i didn't want her to do it. it made me feel guilty, like i had been a part of it. so the next year on the date of "the procedure", i sent her a thinking of you card and signed it "from someone who will haunt your thoughts forever, ur baby!"
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    i accidentally backed into my MIL's car one day and left a giant dent in the door. she thinks the city street sweeper did it cuz her car was parked on the street all night
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I've typed mine out every time I hit SM, but I always delete it before submitting. I had an affair, in revenge for his. I later forgave his, but if he ever found out about mine, I'd be out on the street. No question.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I had an abortion, right after my divorce from XH. I wasn't sure if it was his, or the new BF, because I was still sleeping with XH even after the divorce. I was on birth control. I was crazy, not knowing what to do. I decided the abortion was in the best interest of me and the children I already had. My BFF went with me, and I never told a living soul. But she did. I will never forgive her for that.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    Sometimes, when I'm having sex with my husband, I fantasize that I'm with another woman. Sometimes, that's the only way I can get off. He would die of shame if I ever told him that.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I too was raped but never told anyone because I was stoned outta my mind. I know it was wrong and the guy who did it knows it was wrong and we've never discussed it....
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I have many of these same secrets. I'm so weird & messed up.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    i think everyone is weird and messed up some how.......i sometimes shoplift when i know i can get away with it....i'm 31
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I have stolen massive amounts of money from my employers over the years. All the way back to high school fast food days. I think I am FINALLY able to quit this compulsion and then I do it again. Many times I don't need the money, I just want it and I feel terrible later.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    i slept with a guy my best friend was trying to get with
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I found a credit card on the ground and spent a lot of money with it. So ashamed:(
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I almost had sex with someone who is not my husband last night.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    Dear 4:39, you did not cause your child's autism. I hope you can let that go someday. I (with dr.'s advice) took antidepressants while pregnant and have finally gotten over thinking I caused my child's PDD-NOS. Our doc blames our polluted environment and that has given me some comfort. Hope you will find some too. (hug) I know that your life is tough enough without the blame...
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I did not quit my perscription drug habit/smoking/smoking pot until I was between four and five months pregnant. I have been a single mother since he was born (he's 6 now) and I have earned a B.A and a Masters Degree during that time -- out of guilt I'm sure and the desire to somehow make up for my hideous behavior. My son seems fine intellectually and is mostly happy, but is on the difficult and strong-willed side behaviorally, which I attribute to my drug use. Not a day goes by that I don't hate myself for what I've done. I don't think I deserve to be happy or to be forgiven.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    PP, My son is difficult and extremely strong-willed and I was a saint during his pregnancy. Don't blaim yourself for his personality. He just knows who he is in life!
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    4:39, Your night of partying did not cause Autism! Think of the 70's and 80's! We would ALL have Autism based on the partying our parents did...
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I touched my sisters innaproprait when I was about 6-7. I didn't realize what I was doing, I was molested by an older cousin so I was imitating her... My sister has never said anything but I know it has affected her and her relationship with me. It's crippling.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    Thank you 2:06.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I couldn't afford food a couple of months ago (we had absolutely none) and I slept with a guy for money.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    I lost my virginity when I was 14 to a guy who was 28. I don't feel guilty about it, I wish the relationship could have continued, but he could have gone to jail and he's still a family friend, so no one knows and I will take the secret to my grave. Even my husband doesn't know about it, I lied and told him my 2nd time in high school was my first.
  • Anonymous
    Posts: 29,074
    A few years ago, I spent a week in a lock-down psychiatric hospital. I was essentially having a nervous breakdown, though it was a little more complicated than that. I wasn't suicidal but I was an anxious, depressed mess and couldn't function. I honestly thought I was losing my mind. Best thing I ever could have done but I still don't tell anyone about it.