i was a new mom, just getting back to work. i worked as a car parts delivery driver with allllll men. i walked around a whole 8 hr day with baby puke on my shoulder and back. not one of them said anything to me. co-workers, clients, and customers saw and i had no idea.....i still cringe lol

@CanadianMama it never fails! when ddh and i are going somewhere where i need to be 'dressed nice' i take ds to the sitter b4 i get dressed lol. and he hasnt spit up in a long time now lol

My most embarrassing moment was my first car accident. I hit an ambulance.

I went to go pick my daughter up from school one day when she was in grade 2. Wearing my new new boots to break them in .I don't know what happened, but one moment I was walking and the next I was sprawled out on the paving - in front of students, parents and teachers. Only one mommy came to ask me if I was ok. Got my DD and hobbled back to the car and got home. The whole right side of my body was black and blue the following morning. My right knee and right elbow swelled up and had skin missing. I couldn't walk for a week. But the worst damage was done to my ego LOL... and my new boots were so scuffed that I never wore them again....

I was waiting at the bank for a lien release and reading a paper when I heard the 2 , 8 year olds

Dh was cooking dinner and asked me to run and buy some wine but to hurry because dinner was almost ready. Ran in, bought wine, ran out and got in car. There was a guy sitting in the front seat! He says hey baby let's party! I was in the wrong car!

One time my friend (no really, it was my friend!) was in one of those stand-up tanning beds. She was naked (obviously) and dancing around to the music...turns out she forgot to shut the door to the room, and the door to the tanning bed came open without her knowing it. She also picked the room right by the window! She said she had no idea how many people saw her dancing around naked before she realized it lol! I laughed at her for days about that one!

Ok, once when my ds12 was about 2 I had managed to get a few precious kid free hours, and was on the bus on the way to the shops I totaly forgot he wasn't there and started nudging the poor lady next to me and showing her the 'moo cars' and choo choo out the window, I must have dug her side with my elbow twice before I realised ds was at home, the woman laughed the whole rest of the journey, I wanted to crawl under the seat!

I used to take my mom grocery shopping (she never had a car or a license). This particular trip the store was really busy, so I was just following my mom pushing her trolley for her while she got her things (I was about 21 at the time). My mom let one hellava fart go, turned to me without batting an eyelid and said, "Sis!!. A, That is so rude!! Don't you say pardon?". So, of course I got all the really filthy looks. I felt like I wanted to curl up in the trolley and kill my mother at the same time! She only apologized once we were in the car on the way home - but she was laughing so much I could hardly hear it...  :\">

I'm from GA and we call everyone Sis. I have a cousin and a niece and everyone calls them Sis like its their actual name.

But having said that.... many Afrikaans people refer to their daughters/sisters/nieces etc as "sis" or "sissy", shortened from "suster" which means sister.....

Ok! My turn!
When I was a teen my parents had a friend that moved down to Hawaii for a few years. He came back to the states and brought his wife. She was blonde and older. He brought some home movies to show us Hawaii. We were watching this video of the beach and some people surfing and then the camera zoomed in on this chunky older person wearing a gold teeny tiny string bikini. Totally not okay to be wearing looking like that. I thought he was just being his perverted peeping tom self, So I blurted out "ew she's fat" I heard a few gasps and looked over at my parents. My mom had her jaw on the ground, my dad had his hand on his face and then the lady gave me the 'look'. Turns out, it was her.

About 5 years ago dh and i had made friends with a new couple and they invited us to their house for a party they were having. We didn't know anyone there except the host and hostess. There had to be at least 20 other couples there. We went out into the back yard after a while where the BBQ and everyone else was, I saw they had a trampoline. I got excited and started jumping on it. After a few minutes into my love for jumping, I got too far to the side and flew right off and landed smack on my back, not in the grass, but on the cement patio. Everyone there looked at me like I was some crazy person.

Last year DH and I were at our other friends house and she had invited over her friend from work. My friend had just gotten a stripper pole. We were all curious so us girls started playing on it. Music was going, drinks were being drunk and I went to try to climb the pole and as soon as I lifted my legs off the floor, the music stopped and I let out the biggest fart I had ever done. It was like I "Ron Jeremy" timed it. Fucking humiliating. Then about 6 months after that, the same people came over to our house and I was making dinner for everyone. And I was just standing in the kitchen with the girls, and out of no where I farted again! So then I start laughing so hard I double over and let another one out! Still to this day our friends tell me I am allergic to that girl because I only fart when she is near!

I wasn't so embarassed my this one as my Mom but I caused it. When I was about 6 my friends,brother and I wanted our parents to take us to the movies, but we were told that we couldn't afford it. Ever the entrapraneurs we decided to raise the money ourselves. We got half way down the block when a kindly neighbour called my mom to inform her that we were going door to door selling their underwear. And not just the regular stuff we had everything from what was reserved for TOM to the sexiest of sexies. People were giving us quarters and telling us to go home. My Mom and the neighbour had to do the walk of shame down the block to retrieve their deliquent children and assorted underthings.

Back in the day when I had 4 small children, I managed to get a chance to go the the grocery store by myself.  That was almost unheard of for me!  So after I was done checking out, and as I was walking towards the door with my cart full of groceries, I reached down for the little one that was running around my feet, thinking that it was my son.  Only since I had left my kids at home, it wasn't my son!  As soon as I grabbed his arm, the poor kid started screaming and his mom came running!  Holy God!  You'd think I was trying to kidnap the kid!

Lol @beach_hippie!

Great stories. If you didn't know better you'd think the discussion was embarrassing fart stories.
xMIL wore a full layered skirt and let one out while her date paid for gasoline. She didn't smell anything so she thought she was safe. But when he returned to the car the odor managed to get loose. He tried not to embarrass her as he gagged a bit. He left the car door open. He leaned over to breathe pretending to pick up coins on the ground. This was the 50's before women farted!

So glad times have changed. Farting is normal just not always timely

@thejoker

My aunt Rina once got a job as a pharmacist's assistant. Rina is the kindest, most helpful person you could ever hope to meet, and to make sure she would be able to direct customers to the proper aisle, she had drawn herself a map of the store showing which products could be found where. She was fully prepared for any enquiry, until...

Some pretentious little turd walked in (right after the pharmacist took a bathroom break, leaving Rina alone) and asked her where the prophylactics were. Rina had never heard that word, so she said, "I'm not really sure, but if you tell me what kind of medicine it is, I'll tell you where to find it."

The turd stared in disbelief. "It's a CONDOM, LADY!"

Rina went purple to the earlobes. Just then the pharmacist rematerialized and asked the pretentious twerp if she could help him.

"Well, I don't know," he said. "Can YOU tell me where the prophylactics are, or do I have to tell YOU  what kind of medicine it is?"

Rina didn't last long at that job.

When I was turning 16, my godmother took me to Fl on vacation and her BFF had her hottie cousin staying there also. Up until then we had been making eyes at each other and flirting. Well, I have always had problems going to the bathroom when other people are around so I would wait till late at night. One night I went to the bathroom and blew it up and the whole thing overflooded. I was trying to fix it on my own and couldn't and had to call my godmother, who called her friend, who called the hottie....yea you can see where I'm going with this. I was MORTIFIED.  

After that night, I pretty much kept to myself for the next few days and avoided him as much as possible. I'm STILL embarrassed as I type this, and this is the first time I've ever shared that story with anyone.

About 7 years ago I was fairly new at my job and was stocking some product on the shelves. I had to climb up a ladder to reach the shelf and then a very cute co worker would hand me the product.. well on this day I had a long skirt on and as I climbed up the ladder it got caught and as I went up my skirt came down exposing my bare ass (I was wearing a thong) right in front of my co workers face!! I was horrified! And now he is married to my BFF and never has let me live it down!!