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Other People's Children.
  • AnonUser29
    Posts: 1,169Guest
    So effin pissed right now, I still could scream. Last night, DH had a friend over for dinner with his 2 daughters. They were playing in DD's bedroom (she is in Texas for the summer) and one came out with a Popsicle. We keep the deep freeze in my office which you have to pass through to get to DD's bedroom. I walked in there to not only a freaking mess, Lego's everywhere but even more. DD has a pretty good size collection of Collector Barbies and Porcelain dolls. People have been buying her these all of her life and they have never been opened. She takes pride in them. They cover her dresser top, DVD shelf, Bookshelf and there is an entire bookshelf just for them. These little girls not only opened them but took them apart, took their hair down, undressed them and disfigured them (one has no legs, one no head, and one has a new makeup look). This makes me so sick, as DD never lets anyone touch them. To make things worse, the Porcelain doll collection consists of dolls that go as far back as my grandmother's dolls from her childhood. These were scattered everywhere. As I was going through her room, trying to do some damage control, I found now thawed pre made hamburger patties laying around, including one in the toilet of DD's bathroom. I called DH on his phone, made him get in there and look. He immediately went in there and told friend what happened and giving the mood I had just taken, it was probably best that they left. I understand these are just material things, but these things mean a lot to DD. She takes pride in these, and cherishes them immensely. What can I do here gals? I feel like I could puke over this.
  • MaryPoppins25
    Posts: 1,686Member
    Oh doll! I am so sorry, they are not just material things! They are sentimental and they represent your dd's patience, respect, and maturity in taking care of something she loves. Big hugs because seriously that's bullshit!

    Honestly I'd try to make a list of all the ones that can be replaced and send it to the parents. I'd offer them the dolls their little monsters destroyed and tell them you expect the new ones, in packages, in mint condition. As for the other ones i don't know what to say :'( you're going to have to sit down with dd and explain how mature she is and that some children just aren't as disciplined and responsible as she is. And then try to make it positive by telling her now she can play with them too??? I don't even know of she wants to play with them, thise were neve hwr intentions. Seriously this is kind of breaking my heart. Like how fucking dare they! how old are they? How old is your dd?

    If my dds ever pulled anything like this i know dan and I would offer to pay for anything we could replace, the girls would be grounded and made to write an apology letter and present it to your dd. Seriously hamburgers in the toilet? Ugh I'm so furious for you right now.

    Hugs mama and props for not ringing those little brat's necks.
  • NoDramaMamaNoDramaMama
    Posts: 134Member
    Wow, that's awful. I would be sick! I'm sorry I don't have any advice, can you sneak over to their house & trash their bikes? (Jk, but I would be LIVID). You're poor DD will be heartbroken to have all she's treasured trashed like that. What stinking snot asses.
  • Peace
    Posts: 2,262Member
    How old are these girls? Unbelievable, what a mess.
    Wait until you calm down, then see what you can salvage.

    I hope you hear from the dad about trying to replace the damaged items.

    May want to do another once thru & make sure you got all that raw meat.
    Ugh. Disgusting.

    Wait to tell dd, I think it'll be worse news over the phone.
  • MegsueMegsue
    Posts: 1,848Member
    :O I applaud you for not killing those little shits. Wow....just, wow. I agree with @eapple. I would send them a list of replaceable dolls and demand replacement. That is destruction of property, and if the parents aren't willing to do what is right, then I would call the authorities. But I'm a bitch on wheels like that. Also, PM me your address if you wish. I have a handful of collectible Barbies and dolls (still in boxes, mint condition) collecting dust that need a good home. I have no little girls in my family who can love them like they should be loved.
  • AnonUser29
    Posts: 1,169Guest
    My DD is 9, these girls I believe are 6 and 4. I could send the dad a bill, but what good would it do? They were here because they have no food and stamps don't come in until the 10th. I understand seeing pretty dollies and wanting to play but they knew better. I don't know how many times they have been here and DD has told them NO, they are not toys and to not touch them.
  • GritsGrits
    Posts: 3,863Member
    I mean, really?? In what universe is it okay to go in and trash someone's belongings like that? How old were these kids?? I'm so sorry for your DD. If you can, let me know what some of the dolls were. My sister used to collect Barbies and has several in the boxes. She has been storing them, trying to decide what to do with them for years. She might be willing to part with them for a fellow collector.

    Collections are special, not because of the monetary value, but because of what they represent. What a shitty thing to do! I would definitely present those kids parents with a bill and not have them back until those girls apologized.
    "I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day, and I believe in miracles." ~Audrey Hepburn
  • MaryPoppins25
    Posts: 1,686Member
    @megsue that is incredible I am all googly eyed for you right now! :-* :x
  • MaryPoppins25
    Posts: 1,686Member
    Omg I can't believe they were 6 and 4! They def know better. They should never be allowed in dds room again without her permission and supervision :@
  • BlahMommy
    Posts: 9Member
    If there was that much destruction chances are its common behavior for those girls and the parents were not thinking clearly letting them play in someone else's room unsupervised. I am so sorry, that really sucks. Hugs to you and your little girl.
  • AnonUser29
    Posts: 1,169Guest
    They are NEVER allowed here again. I love kids, and I love the fact that my house has always been a safe place for children. But this has drawn a line. Every child that comes over here has gotten DD's "speech" about her dolls. You ladies are amazing for offering to share but really, you DON'T have to do that. Thank you though.
  • shate98shate98
    Posts: 3,146Member
    I'm so sorry! That's terrible for your dd.

    Even if they can't pay- I would ask the parents to make it up to your dd in some way. They can figure something out. Even if it's just handmade apology cards from the girls. It's never going to fix it, truly. But it will be a start. So sorry!
    "As you wander through your life, whatever be your goal,
    keep your eye upon the doughnut, not upon the hole."
  • i_am_a_thunderbirdi_am_a_thunderbird
    Posts: 1,684Member
    I really don't get why those two kids were allowed to play in your daughter's room unsupervised in the first place?
  • AnonUser29
    Posts: 1,169Guest
    Up until last night, kids in there have never been a problem. As I said, every kid knows those are not toys. We have stressed that and DD has also. Kids are in there all the time. Most pick up their mess and all is well. There are 2 toy boxes full in there, a TV etc. I had gone in there earlier and they were playing with the Lego's. That is deal with able mess. Nothing like this has ever happened. They were in there earlier this week playing no problems then.

  • Peace
    Posts: 2,262Member
    eapple said:

    @megsue that is incredible I am all googly eyed for you right now! :-* :x



    Me too!
    After thinking about this, something is really wrong with those two. I wonder if it's jealousy or what? Acting out against their dad?
    Look at how much they destroyed, & how fast. They were actively trying to do damage. Like on a mission. Going in the freezer & pulling out raw meat?? Then putting it different paces?
    This gets more disturbing the more I think of it...these girls need help. And it's scary they're that little.
    I hope their parents take this seriously.
  • AnonUser29
    Posts: 1,169Guest
    I don't know what is going on. I know that dad has them most of the day and if the way he is here is any indication of the way he is at home, he zones out. Maybe they are left alone or unwatched a lot? I am not too sure.
  • serenitynowserenitynow
    Posts: 2,178Member

    i can only imagine how their house looks if they can do such a thing at someone else's home...i would be crazy furious because they are old enough to know better. unless they have not been taught any better which it sounds like. they should have also been checked on by their father since that's a parent's job.  regardless if they are material things, they belong to your daughter and should have been respected.

    while i do think telling the father you want replacements or to be reimbursed, i think that's probably a lost cause. especially since lots of it sounds like it's pretty expensive or irreplaceable.

     however, maybe having a chat with their dad about how they need to respect other people's things (as well as their own). and tell him that something needs to be done.  so maybe you could have the little girls come over and do some chores for you such as cleaning up the yard, your house....to make up for their damage. and you would also be able to talk to them about how to act right since no one at their house is teaching them

  • AnonUser29
    Posts: 1,169Guest
    Just wanted to add... other than the dad dropping DD's pearl necklace off this morning, DH has heard NOTHING from him. Which is totally unnatural.
  • DreamerDreamer
    Posts: 2,276Member
    I cant say anything these ladies havent, but holy cow... just wanted you to know how sorry I am for you and your DD's things. 
    There are some people who live in a dream world, and there are some who face reality; and then there are those who turn one into the other. Which one are you?
  • MaryPoppins25
    Posts: 1,686Member
    Ummm so they stole her necklace as well, classy. I think maybe it's time to get new friends.
  • nonamejustmommy
    Posts: 162Member
    I would make him pay, and get a good price list and keep all copies of correspondence to and from him. If worst comes to worst you could take him to small claims court. It sounds silly but those dolls are collectable and will be worth something one day. I had one put up forever and my little sister got into it. It's worth about $50 now.  It adds up fast. I hope you get at least something out of him. 
    Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass....It's about learning to dance in the rain.

    Bide within the Law you must, in perfect Love and perfect Trust.
    Live you must and let to live, fairly take and fairly give.

    These Eight words the Rede fulfill:

    "An Ye Harm None, Do What Ye Will"
  • AnonUser29
    Posts: 1,169Guest
    @eapple, I agree. I think that this has been an eyeopener to DH about his friends. He has talked before about how this guy sort of spaces out, I think this time, he has realized how much that can affect this family.
  • MaryPoppins25
    Posts: 1,686Member
    @silentscreamer that's good that he isn't trying to defend him or anything. I would take the ladies up on the doll offers. Wouldn't that be such a nice surprise for your dd c:
  • AnonUser29
    Posts: 1,169Guest
    Yeah, Dh was very upset himself. I think it hit him hardcore when the dad dropped off the necklace this morning. 
  • shadylaneshadylane
    Posts: 3,037Member
    omg. if my kid did that and i couldn't afford to pay for it, i would take back whatever birthday or christmas presents she gets this year and use that.
    ~slim shady~
  • wintermom0208wintermom0208
    Posts: 106Member
    I am just going to stick my foot in here for a moment. Please don't be mad.

    They ARE only 4 and 6.  They weren't 10. Children at 4 still don't understand consequences of just seeing a doll and opening it up. (I can see my kid doing it, not that I would approve at all).

    Where were the adults during this time? I'm assuming for this huge of a mess to be done it would have to have been quite awhile.  Wasn't there any noise? Did the kids not come out a few times to check out what the parents were doing?

    I am so, so sorry for you DD that her things were ruined and taken and that food was spoiled (now THAT I don't understand).  It must be mortifying for the father.  I'm glad he returned the pearls. If that were me, I would have NO idea how I would even be able to talk to you guys again.

    I"m just feeling a little sorry for the kids. If they have a habit of doing stuff like this, I completely understand. I have been around kids that just DO NOT respect things because they were not taught to and have lazy parents.  

    Like I said, just .... putting another spin on things.  Not meaning to cause anyone grief or not to undermine the suckiness of the situation.
  • AnonUser29
    Posts: 1,169Guest
    I understand where you are coming from @wintermom0208. I went in there once when I got up.. (I work nights, sleep days) and they were in there playing Legos and watching Spongebob.
  • AnonUser27
    Posts: 1,742Guest
    This is unreal! I'd be so fucking pissed too! My dd has dolls like that and now I'm thinking they need to be put far far away. Little fucking shits!
  • PrimalbitchPrimalbitch
    Posts: 1,283Member
    Omg. I can't believe that. I'd have been ten kinds of pissed off. But thank god ur hubs had the good sense to tell him to leave!!
  • many_moons_ago
    Posts: 338Member

    I can understand girls aged 4 and 6 touching the dolls but the 6 year old should have known it wasn't a good idea if she had had the "talk" before. The freezer has me boggled. I would say most kids from age 2 know not to touch the freezer. The 2 girls do sound like they are ignored alot to make that sort of mess with the 6 year old showing no consideration for someone elses stuff.

    I'm feeling so sorry for your dd and her prized collection.

  • Charlotte_SometimesCharlotte_Sometimes
    Posts: 1,756Member
    I am willing to bet this is not the first time these kids have behaved like this.  Four and six, taking the dolls out, I can maybe see, but hamburger meat all over?  That sort of destructiveness indicates a problem and I doubt this was the first time they've acted like that... 

    Our DD9 has emotional problems and resulting behavioral problems that we are very much aware of.  And in the past, some really awful and bizarre destructive behaviors.  And for that reason, we have always been SUPER hyper vigilant when she is at someone else's house and around someone else's things.  It is much better than it used to be but we always took responsibility for her and were aware of the potential for her to fuck shit up so we watched her extra close for that very reason.

    Thankfully nothing awful ever happened but there were a couple of times, like when we'd be out at my Mother's and she got caught messing with stuff she'd been told to leave alone, and we dealt with it by requiring her to stay right with us and quietly color or something.

      I am just guessing that their Dad MUST know something here...and just can't/won't deal.
    "But a lesson must be lived in order to be learned" Ani DiFranco, Manhole
    "Screw you guys! I'm going home." Eric Cartman
  • Peace
    Posts: 2,262Member
    Wonder if dad is just embarrassed? Especially finding out they took a necklace too.

    Ok, I was doing some googling. There are doll hospitals listed that repair collector & antique dolls.
    I reread what damage they did, & it sounds like some of the dolls will be ok if their hair gets fixed, right?
    (this is sounding so odd as I write it. What we do for our kids... :) )

    See if there's any in your area. A few came up where you mail the doll in.
    No idea about the cost. And I didn't check the reviews yet.
    I will if you have any interest in this.
    I was thinking either get the broken ones done, so the damage won't seem so bad to dd, or
    get minor repairs like hair to a lot done, so the majority of them will look ok to her.

    You could just do it as you have time & cash.
  • fatchickonabikefatchickonabike
    Posts: 5,636Member
    i_am_a_thunderbird said:

    I really don't get why those two kids were allowed to play in your daughter's room unsupervised in the first place?


    Honestly, I was wondering the same thing. If they had time to do that much damage in more than one room, where were all the adults during that time? Not trying to assign blame, just wondering how they managed to do what they did. I agree, the dad sounds like a space cadet and the kids have obviously never been taught to respect property. Not a good combination.
    "The most essential gift for a good writer is a built-in, shock-proof bullshit detector.” - Ernest Hemingway
  • shadylaneshadylane
    Posts: 3,037Member
    i can understand them wanting to play with the dolls, but destroying them? that's not normal. its like they intentionally did it to hurt ur dd, knowing they were special to her. out of jealousy maybe? i agree the dad is an idiot, he must know they have this propensity, it couldn't have been the first time they did something spiteful or destructive. he should not have allowed them to play in there alone knowing there were things they weren't allowed to touch. i would be paranoid as hell knowing my dd was in a roomful of expensive things even though she wouldn't intentionally hurt anything, kids get into stuff. it would be different if they just played with the dolls but there is no way they thought it was ok to tear them up and take meat out of the freezer and hide it. this was out of spite, little bitches. i hope to god the dad punished them, otherwise he is going to have a lot worse problems as they get older. if it was me they would either pay for it out of their piggy bank, give up presents and/or work it off, and be grounded and all their dolls taken away until its paid off.
    ~slim shady~
  • AnonUser29
    Posts: 1,169Guest
    Thanks for the doll hospital idea. These dolls aren't expensive (the ones they tore up). Just meaningful to DD. Thankfully just the Barbies were the ones tore up. The others they just scattered. It just makes me sad for DD that this has happened. When she was little, I kept them out of her reach except when she wanted to look at them. As she aged, she understood the importance of them and began to cherish them. I have yet to tell her, it's best I think to wait until she gets home. She is already on an emotional roller coaster, stupid hormones! Thanks for the support here ladies.
  • BeerWenchBeerWench
    Posts: 2,820Member
    I read it and agree... I don't think it was malicious in the kids part and I'm sure they didn't know what the hamburger patties were. We are talking about 4 & 6 right?

    It's the parent responsibility to check on kids, both DH as the homeowner and the kids parents.
    :¦:-•:*'""*:•.-:¦:-•** She who leaves a trail of glitter is never forgotten**•-:¦:-•:*'""*:• -:¦:-
  • AnonUser29
    Posts: 1,169Guest
    Ohhh believe me, I couldn't agree more on it being Dh's deal too. Don't think he didn't get his ass reamed. He is taking total blame for it though and will be the one to deal with DD on this.
  • NeedMoreCoffee
    Posts: 103Member
    I feel awful for your little girl. But this is why when my kids aren't home, and other kids come over, I sit out a few toys that are ok to play with and their doors get locked. I would check into the doll hospital too.
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