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Incessant "Good Job"s
  • MommyCharm
    Posts: 13Member
           My DD4 has started a new habit to irritate the living s@*# out of me! Or maybe, I started it, but  never knew it could reach such heights. 
    Because I believed that she was a little slower than her peers (communication, social skills, etc), I began to tell her "good job" for every good thing she did (picking up toys, finishing all of her food, saying "thank you" and "please") Now, that's turned into an all out battle to collect the most amount of "good job"s in every five minute interval. 
    Not that I don't want her to do what I ask her to do, but, am I wrong to flat out refuse to say "Good Job" after EVERY bite of food she takes? For every meal? And, when I happen to be doing something else that requires my attention, (like on the phone with a the cable company), and can't acknowledge the fact that toy shark ate her toy duck, the madness ensues! Screaming, squealing, all out world war 5! So what should I do? It's crazy to be forced to respond to EVERY single thing DD does (not only the constant praise, but having to repeat EVERY random statement she says) She says "Legos fell", I have to say, withing 5 seconds "Yes, the legos fell" ??????
  • BellaBefanaBellaBefana
    Posts: 8,707Member
    I think it's a normal stage...especially when you're on the phone.  My dd does the same thing to me.  If it's a call that I must complete w/o her interference, I excuse myself for a moment, tell her in no uncertain terms that her interruption is not acceptable and go back to my call.  When I'm done with the call, I sit down and discuss that's it's not o.k. to interrupt mommy when I'm on the phone unless she's hurt or bleeding, etc.
    Bite me, cupcake!
  • AnonUser28
    Posts: 2,083Guest
    Mine does the same thing. After everything she does, "Mommy, is it a good job?" It can get a little annoying, but it can be a good tool for discipline too. All I have to do is tell her that it is not a good job to crush her little 4yo spirit, muahahah! Seriously though, she is less likely to repeat behaviour when I tell her that. 
  • sunnymommasunnymomma
    Posts: 2,258Member
    Somewhere along the way in life i was once told that you are no longer allowed to tell your child good job.....WTF? I didnt get it then and I dont get it now. I remember that phase very well. i think I got through it by switching up the phrase, and when I used it. so common things she got a good job for i said it less and less, but uncommon things I said it more and more. Kinda like progressing the good jobs along with her learning curve. 
    I am me, and I am loved
  • momofdbbmomofdbb
    Posts: 9,332Member
    I get it from my DS. He will tell me " good job , momma " for random things like unlocking the house door. /:)
    " Wibbly wobbly timey wimey ......." The Doctor
    " I'm a leafe on the wind..watch how I soar ." Wash :((
    " Oh the wall had it comming.' Sherlock Holmes
    yea I am geek !!
  • MommyCharm
    Posts: 13Member
    I am trying to wean her off of it...slowly but surely. I say "Good job" for little things, but started saying "Excellent! Mommy and Daddy are soooo proud of you! " for big things, like using the "big potty" by herself and asking me for her juice, instead of throwing a fit. Seems to have worked for the day, as I am still sane! I think I must have explained to her 50 million times that I will congratulate her when the ENTIRE bowl of cereal is gone, not just one bite. I've also managed to make sure my mouth is full of food everytime she is about to ask for a response. (She knows that we don't talk with food in our mouth!   :-))) until her actions really do require a "good job". 
  • tothemoonandbacktothemoonandback
    Posts: 2,259Member
    Somewhere along the way, DS2.5 learned how to tell himself good/great job.  He poops and says "Great job pooping, Jameson!!".  Not sure if he's really telling himself that or saying what he thinks I should be saying.
    Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius, and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring. - Marilyn Monroe
  • fatchickonabikefatchickonabike
    Posts: 5,626Member

    DD started telling me good job for things like tying my shoelaces. Been doing it for almost four decades now, kid. I've had some practice!


    I alternate "good job" with "thank you," as in, "Thank you for doing what I asked," or "Thank you for listening, I really appreciate it."


    If it really isn't a good job, I don't BS but I try to be nice about it and make suggestions instead of crapping on what she just did. Like most of motherhood, it's a very fine line.

    "The most essential gift for a good writer is a built-in, shock-proof bullshit detector.” - Ernest Hemingway
  • iamslowlygoingcrazy
    Posts: 145Member
    I would say it's an age thing too.  My daughter likes to tell me good job every time I'm on the toilet lol  It's especially entertaining in a public washroom when she yells out "good job mommy, good poo" lol
  • luckymama
    Posts: 94Member
    I think pre-school is somewhat at fault for this. Bringing home a good job certificate for things that don't need one ("good job, its your birthday!"). I don't think they need to hear it all the time but maybe I'm mean. I told my little girl that its more important if she thinks she's doing a good job and trying hard at something, not that the teacher or mom always has to say it. I also think its a stage they will grow out of as they master new things and grow confidence. I hope!
  • LoveLove
    Posts: 12,840Administrator, Moderator
    Spawn gets so excited when something is done that gets a "Good Job".LOL It's sweet. I get it like "Yay! Momma you throwed that in da garbage? Good job! Momma? Oh, you pee pee in da potty? YAY! Good job Momma! You did it!"

    Hahahahahaha

    He alternates "Good job" with "Yay! You (or I) did it!" (he's a HUGE fan of Dora)

    community-manager


  • Emmie
    Posts: 277Member
    I'm a grandma, and with dgs who is almost 3, I like to compliment him to others.  I will even tell the dog or cat, "Did you see that he just picked up all his toys!  What a little man!"  We also do fist bumps a lot, for things like peeing in the pottie.

    I think that if you mix it up and give her different praise sometimes, she will get over it.


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