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Tired of initiating. What should I do?
  • scarle
    Posts: 6Member
    It has come to the point in my marriage where I have to initiate everything involving my DH. If I want to talk about our day I have to start by asking him how his day was or if I want some simple affection I am the one who has to kiss him first. He is fine once I start things up but I wish he would initiate things for once. I have heard that this is just a guy thing and not to worry about it but I am getting really tired of being the initiator. For once I would like myDH to wake up in the morning and kiss ME. Or come home and ask how MY day was. Or shoot me a txt that says I miss you. Currently he is driving home from Cali with his sister and I haven't received one original txt or call from him. They have all been a reply to what I have sent. And he also takes 4 hours to respond. I guess I feel like I think about him and miss him more than he does me. That makes me feel bad. I feel like I should stop talking to him and see how long it takes him to think of me or care. Is this strictly him being a stupid guy? What if I don't hear from him for the next 2 days of his trip. What would that mean?
  • MarySunshineMarySunshine
    Posts: 5,873Member
    Tell him how you feel.

    I was the one initiating sex all the time. I finally said something to DH one day. He was genuinely unsure about initiating it because at the time I was working a stressful job and he didn't want me to feel obligated to have sex, especially if I was tired and feeling stressed out.
    After we spoke about it he started initiating it.
    I'm as sexy as a burp mid-kiss. Watch out!

  • meandmy243meandmy243
    Posts: 6,655Member
    I found out tonight i have to initiate and be ready to for sex at the same time... Jerk..
    mom of wild children
    going to the chapel 7/5/2014
  • justjen
    Posts: 6Member
    My DH is the same way.  If he does call from work he goes on and on about his messed up day then hangs up.  It darkens my mood for the rest of the day.  When he comes home he does the same thing.  I'll just say "Our day was great, DS did this or DD did that".  It is so annoying because I feel like he doesn't take a geniune interest in how WE are.  I think some, not saying ALL, men are just selfish.  I've been trying to speak up, it's helping a little..