Awww honey...I'm so sorry. I can understand why you feel the way you do. I think it is completely jusified. You just want your dad to show you that you are as important as his "new" family. I don't have any advice to offer. I have not been in your shoes (my sperm donor bounced before I was born) but I do know how it feels to crave a relationship like that. Just want to give you lots of hugs.

Wow, I could have written your post.  My parent split when I was 9.  I can't even remember him leaving although I've talked to my mom about it and I was there.  I think I've blocked it out because it was so traumatic.  I too have a great relationship with my step dad and a not so great one with step mom and she too has always been there (since 2 years BEFORE my parents split).  I went to counseling for this among other things.  The counselor basically told me I needed to be brutally honest with my dad and get it out, what did i have to lose?  Well I didn't for quite some time.  Our relationship actually got to the point where i was fed up and didn't speak to him for a year.  Eventually we got together for a meeting, just the two of us.  And this is where the brutal honesty came in.  I told him things that had been building for years, like never ever calling on my birthday since I was a teen.  And he told me how we had always treated my step mom like the whore who stole him from my mom.  We managed this without anger and I realized he was right.  In the back of my mind I always felt that way.

Long story short my advice would be, when you are ready, you need to be honest about your feelings.  They are valid, every girl wants to be daddy's little girl.  No one can replace that void.  And if things don't turn out well at least you can sleep at night knowing that you did everything you could to heal the relationship.  It takes time to heal wounds like this but I think the first step is honesty.  But I do understand the fear of being honest.  I was always afraid if I was that he would abandon me completely.

Big hugs to you  >:D<  BTW, I'm 29 too!

Now keep in mind my input is coming from someone whose father is dead...he died 10 years ago when I was 30.

I have so much that I wish I'd said.  People always talk about telling people you love them before it's too late, and I think that is important, but I honestly also wish I had let him know how much he HURT me.  I wish I'd confronted him with his asshole behavior.  The way he put my stepmother first.  The way he put his SONS before me. 

He was distant, at best, after my parents split when I was little and I always had the feeling that when I visited I was cramping his bachelor lifestyle.... and over the years the contact was less and less.  I put up with him treating me badly because I was afraid if I said anything he'd drop me completely.  Well, now he is gone and I regret not just getting it all out there.   I am still carrying around a lot of anger for a man who has been dead a decade. 

I do think that we are all somehow "daddy's girl" or "mama's baby" no matter how old we get, in some way, and that's why these hurts linger and linger.

@TrEr02 I know it's terrifying!  You just have to wait until you are ready.  It took me a good year or so after counseling to work myself up to it.  It helped at that point I felt I had nothing to lose.  I really think a lot of things are lack of communication.  For example, my dad never calling me for my birthday.  He doesn't think that birthdays are a big deal as he wasn't raised that way, *I* was.  But I never told him how much that hurt every year, I just let it build up.  But then none of his kids called him last year for Father's Day and he got it.  Having been mainly raised with my mom, I had her values and expectations.  My dad is the polar opposite of mom, don't ask me why they married lol

Im sooo glad Im not the only one who had a bad time with divorce!! My step mom also said some pretty cold shit to me...I had a blankey that I slept with and one day she cut it half right in front of me. Who the fuck does that?? I have never told my Dad..what good what it do to tell now? Who know...she even has called my mother and told her she was a shitty parent because I got prego at 17. What a chode lol. Maybe I should just let it rip and unload

I think Im gonna talk to him this weekend

I will keep you all posted :)

Did not go well...I ws told Im bringing up the past and I need to move foward. Figures

@ophelia I know right!

Ugh what an ass.

My dad is 3000 miles away and used to be so close. Now that my step mom is in the picture I've seen him once since I was 4 times since I was 15 :( he's never met my kids and won't stay on the phone when step mom wants his attention. It's sickening. We used to be so close too. I'm
Sorry it didn't go well. I'm the type to cut people off So I would cut him the hell off and see how long it takes for him to see the damage that his and her actions have caused!

@TrEr02 I'm in a similar situation with my Dad :(. Him and my mom broke up for good 3 yrs ago (i was 25) and recently he is just acting like a grumpy old man!!. For his bday I cld him a week ahead and told him that me and my sis would like to take him out to eat. He said ok... so I saved up and thought all week of the places he would like to go eat bla bla.. cld him that sat morning at 9 and he said he ws still sleeping and hung up on me! :( So i cld back @ 12 and he sounded so bothered with my call, said he would take a raincheck because his gf was in town. =(( i just hung up on him. so now it's fathers day, i call him no answer.. i go ahead and make his cake and make dinner it ws meant for my dad... but told my husband it was for him since he never cld back! this weekend me and my sis were talking and our 5 kids were playing in my daughters room when my oldest comes fr outside saying my dad is honking like a maniac outside... I honestly didnt hear!... So I go out there and tell him to get dwn he says no! I just want to see the kids. So I told the kids to go outside and talk to him.. and me and my sis stayed inside. It took all my strength not to start crying from how mad/sad i was. I told my brother and mom.. she says that's just how he is.. he says to just give up and quit trying. Im trying but even as old as I am it hurts so bad.

@wtfwit thats terrible!! I would have cried, poor girl! @summer1234 I couldnt agree more, It really has a life long effect!

@wtfwit I would have gone ape shit on him lol. My dad can do know wrong so he gets very confused when anyone comes to him about how he has parented lol