My children are gross. Not, like a little gross. But, really, really gross.
Now, aside from the colorful rainbow bowel movements, raunchy fingernails and stinky feet, my children have a bad habit that is wildly out of control. A habit that I am ashamed to admit. It’s both revolting and embarrassing. I call it “snot on the wall.” And it makes me sick.
My darling daughter exhibited this behavior a few years ago and it was temporarily resolved by placing a box of tissues and wastebasket in her room. Now that she has brothers, though, the polite manners have been abandoned and all three of them mindlessly wipe their messy noses on whatever surface happens to be nearby. Conveniently, all snot looks alike so there is no pointing fingers at the guilty party. There are few things that annoy me as much as seeing a streak of yellow/green crust adorning my walls. It’s just plain infuriating.
Yesterday, while I was eating yogurt, I felt something on my shirt. I wiped it with my finger to lick off the vanilla blend, and thankfully took a moment to examine it before licking. Not only was it not yogurt, but it was yellow snotage courtesy of my middle son. It’s one thing to use my own sleeve to wipe their noses, it’s an entirely different thing to unknowingly be used as a human tissue. The nerve of that kid!
I’m leaning towards just letting them eat it. At least there’s no messy cleanup.