Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy
Latest posts by Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy (see all)
- Dear Judgy Mothers on My Website… - June 15, 2013
- 10 Skills Every Mother Should Possess - June 10, 2013
- Perfection (Or pretty close) - June 3, 2013
Picture this:
• Michigan Avenue, Chicago
(we all tagged along on Jeff’s week long business trip.
Great idea, in theory. In theory.)
• Thunder, lightening and pouring rain
(what happened to the 80 degree sunny forecast?)
• Me, frizzy haired and exhausted
(thanks to 3 kids up and ready at 3:57 am.
Damn humidity and damn central time zone)
• Evan strapped on me in the Baby Bjorn
(dribbling slobber and spit up all over me)
• My one hand pushing Ben’s stroller
(and swerving all over, because it really needs to be pushed with 2 hands)
• My other hand and grasping Lily’s hand as she tries to run away
(because an hour and a half in American Doll store just isn’t enough)
I fully expect the city of Chicago to see a drop in unplanned births
next March due to the sight of us.
{ 77 comments… read them below or add one }
Sounds like a dream family vacation my dear daughter! Hopefully the weather will improve but it has got to be tough—-funny images though!! xxxooo
lol – I didn’t see where you were going with this until the very end. Clever!
Parenting is so much harder than it looks, too!
Hahahahahahah – I can just picture you! I’ve had times when people have looked and me and mine and I could tell they were thinking that they weren’t going to reproduce based on what they had just seen!
Bean – you have filled your annual public service quota. I fully appreciate it. Better you than me!
i wondered what they hell you were thinking to “vacation” in chicago with three little kids. oy! you are so funny!
birth control comes in strange forms, huh? yours are the cutest variety, though.
love you all.
Can I get that picture on a T-shirt? I’ll where it on family outings!!
Love it!!
Crud. I just wrote “where” instead of “wear”.
Please take away my keyboard…
Traveling with kids is not relaxing it’s just mobilizing the stress you already feel at home!
So funny! I was trying to guess how the little clip art was going to relate you your trip to Chicago…until I got to the last line…LOL!!!!
LOL- could it be anymore fun? Over from SITS…
gotta love those vacations with the fam! Remember-you are making memories! One day, you will recall this even and chuckle. At least that is what I have been told. Never actually experienced it yet!
Truth, always Greater than Theory!… But at least you can say you went to the American Girl store. Someplace my daughter* would never be caught dead… Regardless of the fact I used to share the catalogs with her in loving reverence.
(She’s 15 and much to my dismay, never spent one day of her life playing with a doll!)
Followed you over from SITS and adore this chubby baby picture on my screen.
I love your “proudest parenting moment”!!!
Funny stuff you have here!
too funny. I have often wondered if being out and about with my girls if I have given anyone food for thought…and perhaps they might have been inclined to buy another box of condoms, just in case :-)
Funny! The picture says it all. And so do you walking down the avenue!
I have been following your blog for a while now (I learned of it from a red-haired babysitter living with us who used to hang around your house and beautiful babies); but only now decided to comment. I have been on many trips like the one described here…and it is easy to feel like an unwitting billboard for Planned Parenthood. Anyhow, love the blog…thanks for sharing.
Tausha, Thanks to this little blog, I was able to see the humor in it at the time, rather than years later! I really don’t think I could hsve before.
Noble, I will say that I am really glad that we have no big summer plans! Vacations are not what they used to be.
EmBee, The store was pretty amazing. I could have spent hours and hours there alone!
ME (A), so glad you decided to comment! We miss that red haired girl :)
Too funny! Congrats on being featured!!! Love your blog . . .
Hee! Congrats on being the featured blogger! I’m off to browse your archives now………… :)
Cheers!
Congrats on being featured!! More power to you on taking her into the American Doll store!! I’ve only taken the boys into build-a-bear once…and never again!
Sometimes, I feel the same way.
Congrats on your SITS feature today! That post was hilarious. I got a great mental picture of it. You are a brave soul!
My cousin lives in Chicago and I remember her talking about seeing this lady on Michigan and with three kids and that she looked at her one baby in the backseat, called her hubby and said “You’re getting fixed”
I’m so excited you’re the SITS featured blogger. Yay for you!
I can just see this – poor thing. My hubby wants me to accompany him along with the 3 kids (8,5,1) to a basketball camp – now how fun is that for me???
I believe you have paid your debt to society :)
Popping in from SITS. Congrats on being featured, your blog is very cute.
Oh man. I did that same vacation with 2. I don’t even want to imagine it with 3. I’m glad you made it out alive.
What a relaxing “vacation”. haha
You have done the citizens of Chicago a service. Really.
I’ve said it before, I’ll continue to say it over and over again…
If the kids are in tow, it’s not a vacation for mommy! You’re still doing your job, just in another locale. And that’s OK–it’s just not a true getaway, ya know?
p.s. You gonna do a post about the American Girl store? My 6 year old daugher would love to live vicariously through you!
Love the picture! I’m going to print it out for those times when hubby deserves to be in the dog house.
That is so funny and boy, does it bring back memories. Me and 4 kids under 5, including newborn twins, making a day trip into the city, on the bus….
Oh how I remember those days…..
The other day we were at Church and our Chaplain was quite impressed with how easily I was able to pour a cup of Orange Juice while juggling my handbag on one arm and holding my plate of goodies in the other…..I told her it came from years of juggling 4 small children thru life situations…..mine are all grown now.
Here from SITS. Sounds like a complete nightmare to me and I am in awe of you “controlling” three children when I can’t even control one!
I hoped on over from SITS. Great blog and congrats on your feature.
Although on my many excursions the children are so well behaved that people marvel at my parenting. It is really a wonder to see. Everyone is smiling and we all smell like sunshine.
*Now if that didn’t make you bust out laughing I don’t know what would. LOL*
Nah, you fit right into the Chicago landscape. That was me many years back. It didn’t stop anyone from procreating!!!
- Suzanne, the Farmer’s Wife
Oh dear, I so needed to read that today. I’m sorry, but I can so feel your pain. I was just thinking the very point of your (hilarious) post on the 4th of July, at a BBQ we went to…my 5-yr-old threw the TANTRUM (how do I type that word bigger?) of the century (yes, I will blog about this) and my main thought was…
“We are SUCH good birth control.”
LOL, girl! Happy SITS day! Off to read more!
short, sweet, and oh so perfect! As a mom who has had one strapped to me, pushing one, and screaming at the third to “KEEP ONE HAND ON THE STROLLER!!” — I can so feel your pain ;)!
Have a LOVELY day being queen of SITS!
Oh, man, I feel for ya. That has to be one of those nightmare scenes you will have flashbacks to for ages!!
Haha…I will keep that on mind.
Sorry, but better you then me, been there done that, and am totally done with that. (janes blog)
Oh, you poor thing!
Came via SITS!
You are very brave. I only have 1 small child and barely have the courage to take him to Walmart by myself.
Your perspective is awesome. So funny!
You deserve a spa treatment, or at least a foot rub from your hubby
I used to say I would never be one of those women who take then uncontrolled children out in public. HA! Now I smile when I see it happen to someone else (Not maliciously, just ’cause I get it) And I still want more (I have two) but when my husband sees this happen to someone else he is all “See we really don’t need another one. We’d be out numbered.” So it worked on him.
Yikes. Did they at least get to swim in the hotel pool? (Wait a minute; that might not have been fun, either, given their ages…)
you paint quite a picture with that description
I can get quite frazzled without kids, I can’t imagine what I’ll be like once those little bundles of joy come along
LOL. You’re creating some very nice memories for your family.
LOL OH Man, i’ve never been to chicago but I’m sure I’ll visit when we go visit hubby’s family.
Wow – the American Girl doll store… I’ve only seen it on Jon & Kate + 8, but it looks fun. I have 3 little boys so I doubt I’ll ever get to go.
Yeah, seeing that would’ve put me off having kids for an additional three years, at the minimum. As if I don’t have enough reasons not to have children. ;)
I will take credit for personally controlling the birth rate in our part of the country. We are THAT special.
Funny. Your blog is cute..and your kiddos are cuter!
Clearly, moms need a couple of extra hands.
Classic!!! This really did have me LOL. Congratulations on being featured over at SITS! You have a talent in this bloggy blog world!
Too funny! Congrats on being a saucy blogger!
Oh, I’ve seen the parent like you…you’re right, it is a sure fire way to say no and say it loud and proud! LOL ;-P
I only have one, and my sister says that watching just me is enough birth control for her, lol.
They totally need to design a one handed stroller.
That post was enough to put me off of Baby #2 for awhile :)
Found you from SITS!
Yes. Ma’am. After two boys, 16 months apart, we practice abstinence as our policy. It’s the only surefire way to avoid another. LOL.
No kiddies yet, and maybe not for a while after reading this! Just Kidding, that was hysterical…one day you’ll look back and laugh–maybe?!
Been there, done that. Feel your pain. May the force be with you. marlene
That was tooo funny!
I’ve done more than my share of walking PSAs for “just say no to sex” or “use protection.” In fact, I think I pretty much do that anytime I go out in public with my kids.
Haven’t we all felt like walking birth control from time to time. You are a brave soul – way to go mama.
I thought my husband and I were the stuff when we took our one child to NYC–but three kids in Chicago! Where is your medal? Plus, you deserve props for all those unwanted pregnancies you prevented! It does just make sense.
I bet other women looked at you and in their minds gave you a Medal of Honor. And then decided that if you could be that Super Mom, so could they!
Love your last comment. Priceless!
Seriously! Having done this (sans American Girl store stop) with one baby on a nice day, I can only imagine…
Congrats on being featured!
And I’m actually grateful that the birth rates in Chicago may drop. There are some truly poorly parented children around here. Besides, I want less competition for my wee ones when it’s time for them to start playing sports?
Yup – I always say Planned Parenthood must advise their customers to read my blog in order to encourage contraceptive use.
I love these days! To feel like you are doing such good!!
LOL!! I can sooo imagine this happening!! And people ask me why I tied my tubes! I tell them no more kids, tubes are tied, cut and burned.
ha ha ha! with 5 kids- 4 of them unplanned (by me anyway)- we are a walking poster for abstinence. just say no!
sits.
I think we’ve all been there. Love the “in theory”!
And the kids will probably remember it as a great time!
I’m sticking to TWO kids so Hubby and I will never be outnumbered…
I’ve heard people say if you have three you might as well have 12. ya. Two is fine with me!!