Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy
@scarymommy
Latest posts by Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy (see all)
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For months, we’ve been trying to get Lily to have a solo sleepover at her grandma’s house. These days, she is the most demanding one at night. The one who plays so loudly that she wakes up her brothers. The one who comes downstairs six times for water. For help changing her doll clothes. For one more kiss and one more song. How nice it would be to have a break, we thought.
We’ve tried to sell her with the movies she and “Bima” would watch, the pancakes they’d cook and the fun they’d have. She’s always refused. She’d get scared and back out, or insist that Ben come along too. We gave up trying a few months ago, it just didn’t seem to be in the cards for the foreseeable future.
Tonight, we had dinner at my mom’s house. Afterwards, the kids changed into their pjs and we started packing up for the forty five minute drive home. Suddenly, Lily didn’t want to leave. Can I sleep over, she asked. Please, just me? She didn’t have clothes for the morning or a toothbrush, but we agreed. I kissed her good-bye and headed home with the boys. There was not a single tear shed.
But, back home, it’s too quiet. It feels empty here without her. And I’m sad. The last four years have gone by in a blink, and before I know it, my baby girl will be a young woman. And someday she’ll leave our house for good. But, for now, she is the sweetest, smartest, most incredible little girl I can imagine. She is so responsible and thoughtful that, sometimes, I find myself expecting too much of her. I forget that she is only four years old. And now, I’m aching for my little girl. I can’t wait to pick her up tomorrow and squeeze her tight. I can’t wait to hear her giggle while I kiss her neck. I’m going to hold extra long.
And I don’t think she’ll be sleeping out again for a while.
{ 23 comments… read them below or add one }
Awww… I’m pretty jealous about the empty house, but I totally get what you’re saying… I can’t stand to watch Dottie leaving babyhood…
You have a remarkable talent of so eloquently & honestly conveying the feelings of being a Mom. I remember these times as if they were yesterday and although my boys are older now, the longing never goes away; one more hug, one more smile… the giggles change to laughs but the treasures stay the same.
Good for her! My kids don’t like going to sleepovers. They have their friends come here. So I usually have a house full! Thanks for sharing — Much Love –
That is so sweet. Now print this off and when she is 13, read it over and over and remember how precious she is now.
I know what you mean. Hayden has regular sleep overs at his grandmas and it is so quiet without him here. I alway feel like something is missing. Its just not the same.
Awww….this makes me want to pick my oldest up from school and grab them both for a long hug :) Just remember this in a few years when she is a teenager! LOL!
we have been trying to convince our 4 1/2 yr old son to sleepover at grandma’s for a while, too. but now that i’ve read your story, i have no interest in not sleeping in the same house as him. ever. :)
I am dreading the first night away from our little devil…I think I am going to be in he same boat you are…excited and terribly sad. Funny how those two things can go together?!?
I remember having a lttle girl once and having those same feelings…..now I listen to you have them with Lily! Hey—don’t make it so she won’t do it again for such a long time. She was delicious. It was great and the bonus for her (and for me) was having Uncle Matt here too! xxxxxooo Mom
That is too funny and always how it goes right! I am the same way with my little one…she is a good sleeper though…that I am thankful for!
My girls love sleepovers at Nana’s. I miss them too, though. I make myself feel better by insisting that my husband take me out for a steak.
I have a few I can send over if you ever want extra company. j/k
This is SO sweet. I love that you are so ready to love her up when you see her.
Great blog and I love your sidebar buttons! They are so funny…..I’m going to add one to my blog!
oh that made me teary!
Ohhh! :) That was so sweet! And here I am….begging people to take my boys overnight.
I did squeeze her tight when I picked her up today. It was wonderful to see her and I really missed her a ton last night. But she’s been driving me nuts since the moment we stepped in the door. Maybe I won’t wait forever to ship her off again ;)
Isn’t that funny how that happens?
I always look SO forward to Bram going to his Iddy’s, until that time comes and I am miserable the whole time, missing him until my heart hurts.
I so hope you will be thinking this when she is a teenager. I love my boys, but when they leave for the night it’s heaven!
your proudest parenting moment alone, is enought ot have me coming back. nice to meet ya
Oh my goodness! That is soooo me! #2 had her first sleepover at a friends house and I was so sad when she was gone. #1 has started staying home by himself while I take #2 to ice skating on Wednesday nights. Hubby come home like 20 minutes after we leave but I miss having him with me…it’s weird! Our children grow up way to fast!
I am coming to you by way of Best Posts of the Week and this is a great post that I can totally relate to. Our four-year-old is incessant at times and gets on my last nerve but, when she isn’t here, it just isn’t right. A piece of us is missing. Boy, am I in trouble when she leaves for good!!
I can totally relate. Sometimes I’m begging for a break from the kids, but when they’re not with me, I miss them terribly!
(visiting from BPOTW)
The first time is always the hardest. I would love it if we had family close enough to let our girls go spend the night for one, or two…or more nights :) But you’re right, although it’s nice to have them gone, it really is nice to have them back again :)