11 Ways Your Perspective Shifts After Kids – Scary Mommy

11 Ways Your Perspective Shifts After Kids

Once you have your first child, you realize that your priorities and perspective has changed more than a little. Let’s take a look, shall we?

1. Clothes
Before Kids: I fell in love with this shirt and I HAD to have it, so what if it’s dry clean only?
After Kids: Well, it wasn’t that special.


2. High Heels
Before Kids: You used to love the way your legs looked in heels. They made you feel sexy. They complimented your favorite dresses.
After Kids: Now, you see a pair of heels and all you can think is why would anyone want to put their feet in those death traps. Walks straight to the flats.

3. Your Car
Before Kids: You said you would never be caught dead in a minivan. “That’s so not me.”
After Kids: OOOOOOHHH… Automatic doors!!

4. Manicures
Before Kids: You would never be caught without freshly painted nails.
After Kids: You now prefer the “natural” look because with all the dishwashing, bathing, and hand washing, there’s no point.

5. Panties
Before Kids: You had a drawer full of sexy panties, and thongs were a wardrobe staple.
After Kids: You still have all the same panties, you just dig around them in your panty drawer to get to your more comfortable pair.

6. Food
Before Kids: Organic is best. The taste is distinct. A well balanced meal of meat, veggies and grains is of the utmost importance.
After Kids: HA! You are happy if your kid eats at all, and well balanced…yeah right. And, you are not beyond going to the fast food drive-thru.

7. Vacations
Before Kids: It used to be, the more exotic the better. Hey, no need to plan, you loved spontaneity.
After Kids: Now, you have to plan a year in advance. Exotic? Nah, you now look for key words like “kid-friendly.”

8. Shopping
Before Kids: Shopping was the best. You could spend all day walking around, in your heels mind you.
After Kids: As soon as you step foot in the mall. One kid has to use the bathroom (poop) and the other is hungry.
Plus you now undress in front of a very opinionated audience, “Mommy’s got a big belly” and “I see her butt”.

9. Drinking
Before Kids: You used to be able hang with the best of the them. Beer, wine, whatever.
After Kids: Now, you have a couple glasses of wine and after you finish the dancing “the oochy coo” you conk out on the couch and awaken to a new day.


10. Baths
Before Kids: You loved exploring new scents of bath salts for long soaks by candlelight.
After Kids: Now you’re lucky if you can shower. And when you do you’re in and out so quick, you can barely avoid tripping on your kid who’s sitting criss-cross applesauce watching.

11. Exercise
Before Kids: You were the “exercise gives you energy” type. A nice run did your body good and you couldn’t resist a good running pant.
After Kids: Now you chase your kids around the house to increase your heart rate and suck in your stomach as you walk past a mirror.

Related post: 18 Ways Life is Different After Kids