JD Bailey
Latest posts by JD Bailey (see all)
- Rage: The Scariest Symptom of PPD - February 6, 2013
It’s Spring Break time. Fifteen years ago, that phrase was magical. Florida, sunshine, partying, cute boys… Now? Now it means my kids aren’t in school. Which means I still want to drink copious amounts of alcohol throughout the week. But for very different reasons.
But, cheer up, my friends in similar boats! There are some amazing similarities between college spring break and spring break as a parent of young, school-aged children…
1. Scantily-clad girls are running around unchecked, giggling and screaming.
2. There are grumpy grown-up residents yelling at the kids to behave.
3. There is a risk of finding a unidentifiable substance in my shoes sometime during the week.
4. My sleeping arrangements for the night are always unknown and could be any of the following:
• Sharing a bed with another female who snores and hogs the covers.
• Sharing a bed with a guy who wants to get in my pants.
• Sleeping on the floor because I didn’t play my cards right at bedtime.
5. At 2AM I might be woken up by a request to assist someone in the bathroom because her tummy hurts.
6. My roommates are always wearing my clothes without asking.
7. I’m really, really tired because loud, inconsiderate people won’t let me sleep.
8. Every single friggin’ day, there’s always a girl crying about something at some point.
9. I’m not sure the last time the sheets on the bed were changed but I’m too tired to care.
10. There’s a yucky smell emanating from somewhere in the room and no one can figure out what it is, where it’s coming from, or whose fault it is.
11. I keep finding people’s underwear in strange places and I don’t want to know how it got there.
12. I could go to bed with one person and wake up with a different one. Or two.
See? Key West 1997 and Suburban New England 2013. Not so different after all.
{ 29 comments… read them below or add one }
so, so funny and I wish you well with spring break with your little ones. for the first time, my two are both going on trips with their friends. One is a high school sports trip and will be supervised (a mom can hope) and the other is a college trip. I just reread your list and I am now officially terrified!
grownandflown recently posted..Empty Nest Cooking
Perfect. Spring break is next week and it’s gonna be a looooong one.
We haven’t been brave enough to go on a real vacation with my toddler yet. And now it’s official. You’ve terrified me enough that I don’t think we’ll be going anywhere for at least another decade.
Jessica Smock recently posted..Introducing HerStories: Tales of Friendship
Great list here. As for the young mothers, enjoy the little ones on spring break now. The reason for this is when they get older and take off to the sun shine beach, you are going to sit at home and wonder what kind of trouble they may be getting themselves into and if they are going to come home the sweet person they were before they went on spring break.
And when they get home, don’t I repeat DON”T ask them any questions. You do not what to know what went on “when they were on there spring break” leave well enough alone.
There are some things parents are better not know. Trust me on this.
Thanks for the smiles.
Debbie
Debbie recently posted..Whatever You Give a Woman She Will Make Greater
You nailed it! Our lives with children aren’t so different, huh? I sent this to my college spring break companions. Thanks for the chuckle!
Wait, that’s not just spring break, that’s EVERY DAY in my house!
Although, I was a major nerd and had my wisdom teeth removed on spring break my senior year. Fail.
Too funny! Nicely done JD!
Frugalistablog recently posted..I Just Want to Pee Alone- the book
Cute, funny and SO spot on!! Loved it. Only have one left at home and he’s almost 14. Looking sooooo forward to driving him here, there and everywhere in between mood swings and I’m sooooo bored.
Along with all the NEVER’s..
There’s NEVER anything to eat in this house (after $242 in groceries)
There’s NEVER anything to do around here
You NEVER let me do what I want to do
Yep, can’t wait! Thanks for the chuckle!!
Penny at Green Moms and Kids
http://greenmomsandkids.wordpress.com
Penny Roach recently posted..Green Moms and Kids – Heart Healthy and Kid Friendly Chicken Recipe
Too funny! With five males in my house, I should do my own list about Spring Break at the frat house. Except, I’m too tired from all the late nights. ;)
Kathy at kissing the frog recently posted..12 reasons I hate to be sick
I read this when you first posted it on your blog and it is still funny. I especially like points 1 and 8. They do apply to any age. :)
Mercy recently posted..Weight Loss, part 2: How I am Getting Rid of the Weight
LOL – LOVE it! The whole list is great – Especially #12!
Susan@The Divine Secrets of a Domestic Diva recently posted..I’m in a book! And yes, that’s a toilet on the cover…
#6 …because I just saw a toddler run by in my sports bra.
Paige Kellerman recently posted..A Family Plunged Into Darkness
That pretty much makes every day at my house Spring Break! Who new I was living such an exciting life???
Jenny Isenman AKA Jenny From the Blog at The Suburban Jungle recently posted..What Your Dog is Thinking – As Described By My Dog
HAHA, this is priceless. #12 is definitely my fave.
Momchalant recently posted..PARKS, PUGS, AND PARTY PLANNING
I love this list! I have such fond memories of spring break. Now I remember what it was really like.
Amy recently posted..Just Add Water: My Week Condensed 3/11/13
Two words: Projectile Vomit. Only difference is the contents; One is mostly Coors Light, the other… chicken nuggets.
RachRiot recently posted..If You Give A Kraken A Hamster
I want to send this to my husband, who is constantly reminiscing about the “gold old days” when he was a frat boy. Maybe it will help him see that it really wasn’t all that great. :)
Stephanie recently posted..Dreams: I Just Want To Pee Alone
Love it! I remember the first time I went on a vacation with my little one. WOW, was that not a vacation.
Oh gosh! I have never thought about the similarities before! I love THIS comparison and you are SPOT on!
Courtney recently posted..I cried my mask off today
Ahhhh, this takes me back. Hilarious!!
This was so funny because it’s so true! You killed me with #4, the sleeping arrangements one. BTW, while you’re sleeping on the floor, could you PLEASE find out what that disgusting smell is? :) Ellen
Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms recently posted..March Through the Pintershit of Ugly Sweaters
So funny! #12 has been the story of my life since college. So many different bodies in my bed and never knowing who is who and what part is which! Oh, LAWD! Have some of these monkeys start a-jumping to reduce the numbers. (Even though it will surely increase the ER visits!) Great post!!
This made me laugh! Seriously. Spring break with kids is shorthand for circular sleeping arrangements.
Johanna recently posted..Game Time
Add in two drooling bulldogs and this about sums up my life…
TBag recently posted..OWIO Workouts for Week 1: Tootsie Roll & Frogees included
I’ve even had long weekends end up like this . . . just lots fewer fruity adult beverages.
Ninja Mom recently posted..“Mommy Doesn’t Want to Wipe Your Poop” is the next book.
Seriously, crank up the heat in the house and we might as well be in Cancun! Woo-hoo!
Meredith recently posted..Win your very own copy of “I Just Want to Pee Alone”!
The only thing is… with our modified version of Spring Break we don’t get to pass out on the beach for hours at a time to make up for all that sleep that was so rudely denied us the night before. =(
My kids are SO lucky they’re cute.
:)
Kristen Mae at Abandoning Pretense recently posted..Yeah, That’s Right, I Said the ‘C’ Word…
Yup, that about sums up parenthood. With this perspective, at least we can pretend we’re living it up in college.
Steph at The Healthy Mom recently posted..It’s the little things…
This is so true, especially the sleeping arrangements.
Jessica recently posted..There is no “I” in team
I’d have to check with you here. Which isn’t something I usually do! I get pleasure from reading a post that will make individuals believe. Also, thanks for allowing me to comment!
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