2014-THANKSgiving

Target Whore

78 Comments

If you want to put it a nice way that won’t embarrass my grandmother, I’m a marketer’s dream. But in reality, I’m a Target whore..

Oh, I said it. I usually walk in to this particular store with a list, but come out with 27 additional items that I don’t need. There is no logic to it; Target is my crack. I’m usually practical when it comes to shopping.  I’m a sucker for a sale, but I also buy “investment wardrobe pieces” like peep toes and suits from higher-end stores. But this store covers everything in between. It messes me up the minute I walk through the automatic doors. It actually puts me in a Target trance.

All natural linen spray for under five dollars? Do I need it? When in the heck am I going to use it? Not sure. Oh wait, there’s matching scented hand wash too? I already have soap, but it matches. And it’s cute. Why should I even bother thinking about whether I need it or not? It’s already in my cart.

If a famous designer made it for Target, if it has polka dots or bright paisleys, there’s no question. I’m talking anything from candles to colored colanders. There are rare occasions when I don’t buy it on the spot. Sometimes I’ll turn the aisle and forget about it, and remember it the next day, when I have too many conference calls and meetings to do any damage.

I can count on one hand the number of times I left Target without spending $100. I go in for shoelaces and soy milk and leave with a carton of crap that costs $97. Greek yogurt for $2.29? My mother AND grandmother would yell at me. But I’m already there, the car is parked. I have 30 minutes until I have to pick up my daughter from practice, so I might as well throw it in. I have friends who have to go on Target diets. They can’t step foot in the place. They haven’t gone in months! Months I tell you!

As I’m blazing through the aisles that are so obviously and creatively marketed-especially-for-women, what I don’t realize until it’s too late is that all of these items are going to add up. No, like some crazed mother strung out on caffeine and cotton candy-flavored jelly beans, not until I’m standing in the check-out line, shamelessly arranging my purchases and throwing a pack of gum on top (because it’s pink) that the cashier (who looks like she’s 12, because I’m 40) gives it to me straight. “That’ll be $127, ma’am.”

What the… ?

Comments

The Scary Mommy Community is built on support. If your comment doesn't add to the conversation in a positive or constructive way, please rethink submitting it. Basically? Don't be a dick, please.

  1. 3

    lauren scheuer says

    I had a trick that worked for a while: Handbasket only. Never a shopping cart. But with practice I learned to pack the handbasket with only smaller, lightweight unnecessary items. Larger unnecessary items I drape over my shoulders, tuck under my arms, and hang around my neck. Now the money I save at Target I spend at the Chiropractor.

    Show Replies
    • 4

      Jackie Hennessey says

      God bless you for sharing – unfortunately, I’ve tried this and nearly killed my shoulders because I piled too much inside the basket. Sad, I know. Am I a lost cause?

      Show Replies
    • 5

      Susan says

      That’s hysterical – I do the same thing. And at Bath & Body Works, I say no to the basket. If I can’t carry it in my hands, I’m buying too damn much stuff! : )

      Show Replies
  2. 6

    Moomser says

    I know exactly what you mean and my finances are in moderately good order only because I live in Italy, where target does not exist, and though this saddens me to no end, it also means I only go target crazy twice a year when I visit family. sigh.

    Show Replies
  3. 10

    Kristin says

    I feel your pain! We have a Super Target with the grocery store in it very close to our house so it is very easy to plan to stop in just for milk and come out with a new shirt, a lamp and a picture frame!

    Show Replies
  4. 12

    Victoria KP says

    Oh yes, this is me. On the EXTREMELY rare occasion I walk out with less than $100 in merchandise I walk away feeling oh so virtuous. Then I get home and realize I didn’t get the one thing I went in there for!

    Show Replies
  5. 19

    Suzie says

    Target is coming to Canada! Target is coming to Canada! I guess I should prepare myself for the impending credit card debt. I’ve been crossing the border to zombie shop on Black Friday for the past few years, Target always leaves a crater in my wallet.

    Show Replies
  6. 21

    Denise Dyer says

    I go in for diapers on a weekly basis, and every time I go, I hit the $50 mark. I am so good about keeping my groceries around $125 for a family of four but I can’t keep my Target expenses to just the dang diapers!

    Show Replies
    • 22

      Arnebya says

      THIS EXACTLY! (sorry to yell). But really, I can stay around $125 a week on food. FOOD! But let me walk into Target for Pull-Ups and wipes and I’m at $100 easily b/c now there are 3 for $5 socks and lotion, detergent, chips I thought I discerned I dislike last time I got them, paper towels, a plastic bin for who knows what, but it’s on sale and wasn’t last week. Oh, and popcorn. (The popcorn is actually a bargain compared to the grocery store). And if that $1 aisle ain’t the devil I don’t know what is. $100 minimum every. damn. time.

      Show Replies
      • 23

        Jackie Hennessey says

        I really think we need a Target group therapy session! They are GENIUSES with their marketing. The popcorn, the $1 bin, the adorable plastic plates. YES…$100 minimum every. damn. time.

        Show Replies
  7. 25

    Seriously Sassy Mama says

    Honey, I will hang out at the target whore house with you! I actually only spent $6.00 there the other day. I was baffled. I am going to be there in the next 30 minutes. I must control my whoring ways.

    Show Replies
    • 26

      Jackie Hennessey says

      Go, fellow Target Whore, go! How did you do? I ONCE spent $6 and that was for a RETURN. I was so proud, and shared this with the 15-year-old behind the counter that thought I was a head case. Yes, I still got something, even though I was supposed to be RETURNING something.

      Show Replies
  8. 29

    Taylor says

    Ha! “The $100 Store,” so, so, so accurate. I have to go to Target today. I have a very specific list. I might as well go ahead and write on it “colorful necklace, top off clearance rack, cobalt sandals, patterned pillow on endcap” because I KNOW I will end up with all of those things and possibly more before I get out of there.

    Show Replies
  9. 30

    Christina Gleason @ Cutest Kid Ever says

    OMG, I have the same problem. Go in for two things, drop $100 instead. And the Dollar Spot? I can spend $10 there before I even leave sight of the entrance.

    Show Replies
  10. 32

    Zack says

    I once went to target only to return an item. By the time I came out I had purchased a bag of stuff and forgot to even return the item I went there for.

    Show Replies
    • 34

      Jackie Hennessey says

      Charisse, you are a genius…I think we need to start one. I’ll have to ask Jill if we can do a co-partnering on a group for Target Whores. I’d be OK if it was sponsored by Target!

      Show Replies
  11. 35

    Jeni Kramer says

    The Target debit card is the worst thing that’s ever happened to me! Curse the red-shrited gypsy who seduced me with her promise of 5% off all purchases! It’s all just a game of justification now. “But if you really think about it, since I saved $12.00, it’s like those cashmere toe socks were free…”

    Show Replies
  12. 37

    Karin says

    We live in walking distance, and on a very tight budget. While my iron will serves me well, my brain on a budget interfers as soon as their strategically well-placed dollar bins come into sight. At least the bins are far away from the cash registers. On my way from bins to register I “lost” $10 worth of useless crap yesterday.

    Show Replies
  13. 39

    Janeen says

    I’m addicted to their shoebox totes. The colorful tops and clear bottoms, I end up getting some every time. And yes, the dollar section is evil, evil I say!

    Show Replies

Load More Comments

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>