I’m embarrassed to admit it, but I do not know how to braid. Unlike every other girl during my many summers at overnight camp, I never learned the skill. While other girls were busy brushing, french braiding and bejeweling each other’s hair, I was concentrating on making my friendship bracelets and writing letters home. Touching other peoples hair never appealed to me and having curly hair myself, there’s not much of a need to know all the fancy stuff. And it’s never been an issue for me.
Except now I have a daughter. And it would be really nice to be able to put her hair in a braid for a special occasion without having to take her to a neighbors house or hair salon. I am fortunate that Lily has naturally stick straight hair that requires next to nothing from me on a normal basis. Even without being brushed it still manages to look pretty decent. Thank God.
Lily’s ballet recital is coming up next month. For last years recital, I was fortunate enough to have my best friend here to take over the bun making. I watched in awe as it took her three minutes to make a perfect ballerina bun in Lily’s long brown hair– I had struggled for forty five minutes before she took over and was ready to have a performance day meltdown.
While visiting her a few weeks ago, I cried, Jess– how will I do it without you?? She presented me with a solution that made my day. A little velvet snap on hair thing from CVS that promised to make the “perfect bun.” It took her less than a minute to produce a tight, perfect bun on the top of her own head. It was genius. I could not wait to boast to all of you about my new-found bun making skills. I’d be the envy of all the other mothers there— It would be the best day ever. I bought my very own and rushed home to try it out on Lily. I tried. And I tried again. And again. Lilly cried and screamed and it became clear that it just wasn’t happening. I’ve tried on four separate occasions to get even close to what Jess had, but it’s pointless. I’m just not cut out for this crap.
Can anyone come over next Saturday and help? Because, clearly, I’m screwed.
Previous post: The Best Chicken Salad in the World
Next post: Breaking the Pacifer Habit
{ 63 comments }
Oh man – this is why I was so happy when my daughter chose netball over dancing! I can do ponytails and wonky plaits. No buns, no fancy braids. I feel your pain. (I blame my father, who liked me to have short hair when I was a kid. I had the “Lady Di” for many years.)
Meredith from thinkthinks’s last blog post..A Day at Edgeworth Trains
Sweet Jesus……
Try it when her hair is wet. Buns are almost impossible with dry hair. Especially if her hair is fine. So, pull it back into the tighest ponytail you can, and then twist that as tight as you can while holding it straight down, then slowly start to twist it around the base of the ponytail and put the bobby pins in it as you go. And use A LOT of them. I have found that if you put the pins as close to the skull while grabbing the tail it holds better. Also, as you wrap it tuck the hair as tight as possible to the hair you already wrapped, this will kind of push that hair up to form the ball. Email me if you have any questions. I’ll try to take pictures the nxt time I do Baby Girl’s.
Jennifer’s last blog post..And the winner is……
I completely suck at doing my daughter’s hair as well. I can do your average braid, but anything beyond that is a disaster. I actually did attempt her first at-home trim yesterday, and am fairly pleased with the results… I had to look online for instructions though. ;o)
Melissa’s last blog post..Farm Days
I’m so sorry I cannot help – I’m all thumbs with this. It is a rare morning that I don’t thank the sweet, sweet Lord for my two boys – a little gel, and we’re out the door!!
Em’s last blog post..F.F.F.T. – His name was Phillip.
I say cut it. And then maybe buy a clip on bun?
no?
I suck.
ryan’s last blog post..Rampage
I’m glad I have a boy!! No hair issues! :) Good luck w/ that!
Well, there will be sothing good coming out of this tragedy. My mother also had no idea how to comb hair. NO. IDEA. I now am able to french braid my OWN HAIR (yes, on the back of my head) and I can do it either underhand or overhand so either the braid sits on top of the head or ther hair will tuck into the braid. I had to, if I wanted any semblance of a hairstyle…
coco’s last blog post..Outfit Of The Week-Happy Easter
Oh sure, I will be right over. You must learn this, you must. Get lessons quick. ;)
I’m no good with this either! I never learned the braiding thing either and while I get how to do it, something gets lost along the way. High ponytails are about it for me. Not really helpful, am I?
Robin’s last blog post..Cinnamon & Honey’s Follow Your Heart Giveaway!
I would make it into a sticky bun. That would stay right? Of course I am a guy and can offer absolutely no expertise on this subject.
James’s last blog post..Afternoon Coffee With E.T.
I used to be so cruel to my parents when they didn’t get my ponytails completely smooth and perfect. I know my girls will seek retribution.
the mama bird diaries’s last blog post..the blagojevich blues
Oh baby! Email me your address. I am on my way!!! Listen to Jennifer, she does it like I would!
jill’s last blog post..Adventures in Babysitting
my girls avoid ballet for that very reason. Hip hop dancers wear hats .
swirl girl’s last blog post..WTF Wednesday
I took ballet classes for 20 years – lots of bun experience on myself but I have never mastered doing one on someone else. I’ve heard wet hair and hairspray helps.
Good luck – wish we could be there to help.
T Rex Mom’s last blog post..Where Am I – Can You Spot Me?
Sorry – I’m no help. I can’t do anything with my own hair – let alone a wiggley child…
Kate Coveny Hood’s last blog post..Just a Boy and His Robot
I wish I knew how to help. But I don’t do hair either. I can’t even manage my own let alone someone else’s. I hope my daughter isn’t expecting fancy ‘dos because she’s not going to get it from me.
Amber’s last blog post..A Trip to the Aquarium
I’m sorry… I can’t help. My daughter has very thick hair and typically does not like anything done to it. The most I’ve ever done is the little “Pebbles Flintstone” ponytail on top of the head. Good luck in Bun 101 though. Take notes, I might need to borrow them. :-)
Christina’s last blog post..ROW, ROW, ROW YOUR BOAT…
Jennifer has great advice. I would just add a couple things: While her hair is damp put a bunch of hair gel in it. That helps it stick together. And after you’re done, put a hair net over it. Yes, just like the lunch ladies used to wear, except it will wrap around the bun multiple times. That takes care of any sticking-out hairs.
I’m on my way… I L O VE playing with hair…(I was one of THOSE girls at summer camp…) all of my baby dolls had bald spots on the tops of their heads….
I have a daughter with LONG beautiful hair… & everyday she begs me to cut it SHORT…like mommy’s… sigh***
Start with a pony tail…& get lots of bobbypins… That would be a great way to start learning… & Hell… she will be on stage anyway… so noone is going to be able to tell if it is a perfect bun anyway…
GOOD LUCK!
American in Norway’s last blog post..I ♥ Faces – Reflection
my own personal shame: FOUR (count ‘em) 4 daughters, and i CANNOT do hair. AT. ALL.
scrappysue’s last blog post..wordful wednesday – "it’s the boots mum!"
Pull the hair back into as tight a ponytail as you can get and secure with a band, preferably of the non-slip variety. Wind the hair around the band and whack a hairnet over it (you’ll probably have to put the net on, twist, and put it back over again until the net is all used up). Secure with pins – I’d use the tight variety instead of the open ones. It’s what my sister did when she cut her hair really short but still needed a bun for her comps.
Best of luck.
Oh that bites. What a bummer that the velvet snap let you down.
Buns are a dicey animal when it comes to children because their hair is so fine. When my daughter had a dance recital I used a small amount of hair gel to keep the front smooth and free of fly-away hairs.
I used one of those very small rubber rubberbands, not the ones with fabric because those slide out of the hair. You will need to use scissors to remove the rubber band later, but they’re truly a dime a dozen and it’s not worth trying to pull the rubber band out of her hair.
When she had a ponytail, I used more gel to fashion her hair into a smooth ponytail, wound it around my finger into a circle and then used 100s of bobby pins and gallons of hairspray.
Not the best solution, but it worked well enough for the two hours of her recital.
cardiogirl’s last blog post..What’s the key to a long marriage? Stay and make each other miserable, of course
You’ll have an easier time if, after putting the hair in a tight ponytail, you divide the ponytail in 3 equal sections and then twist and wrap each one individually around the base of the pony tail. Pin as you go and use lots of pins. Then use plenty of hairspray. Try to imagine making it look a bit like a cinnamon bun as you work.
When my daughter was young my then sister-in-law made me a copy of a booklet she had on how to braid hair in many different ways, with step-by-step instructions and pictures. It was and IS wonderful, as I still French braid my now 25-year-old daughter’s hair sometimes and she is learning to braid my almost 5-year-old granddaughter’s hair! I would be happy to make and send you a copy.
Oh the hair issues…luckily I can french braid but it starts and ends there. I got nothing else.
Futureblackmail’s last blog post..KIDDIE TABLE FOR 2
Oh I wish I lived near because I could give her braids, french or otherwise. Sigh. I’m sure you’ll come up with something or someone to help! Would love to see pix of her costumes too!
christy’s last blog post..In real life
Jill – my sister Colby is the best french braider!! And even w/ a non-perfect ballerina bun, Lily will still be the prettiest little girl on stage!! Good Luck!
Jamie
I can not braid for the life of me. That is why I keep my girl’s hair at a bob length. :)
OHmommy’s last blog post..The phone. The phone is ringing.
This is why I’m glad I have boys! I am just not good at doing braids, either. Buns sound easier, but maybe they’re not. How about trying to make her bun right after she gets out of the shower, when her hair is still wet? That might be easier…Good Luck!
Loukia’s last blog post..Goodnight, be-o!
Oh, I know, my daughter wants to keep growing her hair longer because she loves the braids, pigtails, ponytails… the girls in her class have such cute hair, all done up, but my girl has wisps all over the place, with zigzag parts etc…I could NOT handle a bun!
Good luck with it, I’m afraid I would be no help whatsoever!
I am a hair braiding fool. Wish I could help!
Starnes Fam’s last blog post..Current State Of Life
I never learned how to do my own hair until high school. I could do other’s hair (badly) but not my own. When away for camps, my mom would french braid my hair before I left and I just never showered. It was horrible and I think back and can’t believe I did that. Now I can do a messy bun, a clean ballerina bun, ponytail (but only if its dry), french braid, double braids and a single basic braid.
If you can learn how to do a simple braid, the buns will be so much easier as well! Take the wet hair and make a ponytail. Then braid the tail and wrap it around, then secure with bobby pins. It’ll be clean and together and look great, as well as being easy.
Mrs Soup’s last blog post..Wordless Wednesday – Elephant
Oh I am so glad to hear I am not the only one who is inept at hair!
My daughter’s recital is in 2 weeks and she has such fine slick hair – I don’t even know how it will stay in a bun let alone get up there!
OK, I just read Jennifer’s advice…gonna try it over here, and we’ll see what happens;)
Nap Warden’s last blog post..To Run…or Not To Run
How did I live without all of you? Seriously??? Thank you all so much.
Jennifer, I am using your method to tomorrow for her practice- will let you know how it goes. THANK YOU!
I bet you have answer by now, but I wanted to learn how to french braid (god help us all right?) and I saw a few video clips from YouTube. So try YouTube.
Did I ever master the french braid? Hell no.
dawn’s last blog post..white chocolate, pineapple & coconut bark
Oh dear Lord, you need help. She will be scared for LIFE I tell you! My Mom was a TOTAL clutz and would make have boys hair cuts (she called pixies) cuz she could’nt even give me pig tails….It’s not cute if people think your a BOY…needless to say I can french twist, french braid, double french braid, and do just about anything else to my OWN hair…I try to do it to my hairy sons, but they won’t let me!
Too funny!! Growing up riding horses, I always had a tail (or two) to practice on…who would’ve thunk it would help me someday for (possible, yet-unknown) future children. Because knowing my luck, I will have the girliest of girls someday. Wish I lived closer, I’d come help :)
Miss E’s last blog post..She Thinks It Was Her Fault
No girls here. Sorry!
Make her a hair appointment for her!
I am with Ryan – shave it off.
DC Urban Dad’s last blog post..What the f**k Wednesday is back
Oh, I forgot to add. . . Spray gel works even better than hair spray for keeping the hair from wisping up in front of the bun. My girls use Suave brand.
I was terrible at making buns, and when my girls were little they wore snoods (lace bags with elastic edges) fastened to hair bows for class. That way I only had to pull their hair into a pony, clip the bow on, and stuff the hair in the snood.
It gets easier, and eventually the girl learns to do her own hair. After years of ballet, my girls can whip their hair into a perfect bun in less than a minute without even looking in a mirror.
Oh Dottie is so screwed… I have crappy hair, can’t braid or style it in any way… She’s lucky to get a freaking barette.
cristin’s last blog post..At least I have pictures of this one…
This is hilarious!! I think I’m with you. I try and I do ok, though cannot braid. But nothing ever stays in place. Oh well, she looks cute to me anyway!
:)
~Tabitha~
freshmommyblog.com
Tabitha Blue’s last blog post..Wordless Wednesday… Memories
omg OMG this is hilarious ……you can come over and I’ll do your daughter’s hair ….so funny. I do a hair tutorial for you….this is so funny! love it.
…love Maegan’s last blog post..Completely Gratuitous Outfit Post
OMG! Any blog named Scary Mommy must be subscribed to. Will look forward to catching up on your blog through my reader. Check out my site as well when you get a chance. I think you’ll find a kindred sense of humor.
Jeannie
Jeannie’s last blog post..Brown Showers Brings Trained Bowels
Ok, so I wish I had some genius advice, but I have absolutely none. My buns look worse than that. So my solution was to give birth to 2 boys and cut my hair short.
Jill…i can help you. I am coming to the recital anyway….so if you want i can come early to help with Lily’s hair. Just tell me what time. It probably wont be as good as Jess could do it…but it will look good :-)
Looks like you got some really great advice. Thank goodness for our friends in the blogosphere! My only suggestion was to offer to pay for your friend, Jess, to visit you again and save the day. :)
Good luck!
-Francesca
Three Bay B Chicks’s last blog post..Give Respect
Hi,
I am in the same boat as you. I have long thick hair and never learned how to braid or even do a decent pony tail. My daughter is taking ballet and her first recital is tonight. I have my stylist doing her hair tonight, but pictures were this morning and my hairdresser could not make it. I did her hair this morning and she has little bob. I googled how to make a ballerina bun with short hair. It direct me to a few sites. Slick all the hair back with lots of gel into the tights pony tail possible, twist the pony tail and wrap around the base of the pony and pin. Than for all the fly aways, just put a hair net the same color as her hair and pin it down. Spray lots of hairs spray. Luckily, she has black hair so the details do not show. It looked decent to me. Good luck.
jasmine
Sorry… I cannot help you. I never mastered the art of french braiding and bun making myself. I totally suck.
Shannon’s last blog post..I am STILL hungover…
Well, take heart in the fact that you have other talents!
I can do braids, but I’m not great. I have to know how to do *some* stuff with Sarah’s hair, because she has straight hair, yes, but lots and lots and LOTS of it. Enough for 2 more girls. SO unless I do something with it, she gets home looking like Madam Mim.
Elisa’s last blog post..If you are going to San Francisco…
I am so glad I got boys!!!
April Greer’s last blog post..3 Thinks I LIKE About School
Oh no. *giggle*
I do remember certain moms stepping forward before dance recitals in my youth to help with buns. I’d go that route. ;)
Kelly Deneen’s last blog post..We’re Infected. (And a Photostory Friday)
I’m not really good with the hair thing either. I’m good to get mine a pony tail some days. I’ll be in trouble myself if this bun in the oven is a girl…
Sounds like you need a pal who’s a bun expert. : )
Try practicing on one of her dolls that has straight hair, they won’t scream at you if you hurt them, and you can probably learn it in a few tries. Then you can do it on her without any anxiety or practicing on her.
Local hair salon. That’s my best advice.
I feel for you. I could ballerina bun my own hair but it’s harder to do it for somebody else.
That’s gonna be me in a few years I can just tell…
You’ve gotten more comments than I have time to read through so I don’t know if you’d gotten advice or not.
As a former child ballet student with very straight, very fine hair I do have some advice. You need a ponytail band, bobby pins (the “closed” kind vs the “open” kind) hairspray and a fine hair net – match the items to her hair color when possible.
Put her hair in a ponytail right where you want the bun to be. If you haven’t learned to braid you can take 2 sections and twist them together. (but a braid is better) Don’t let go of the end, but wrap it in a circle pattern around the base of the ponytail, starting with the hair that is closest to the base. Stick in a bobby pin or 2 along the way (just in case: open the prong end and slide it in, making sure to catch some of the hair “on her head” and some of the twist) Keep going until the end, using several bobby pins. Spray it with hairspray. If there are bit sticking out here and there, get the hairnet and wrap it over and around the bun as many times as you can, I don’t know how to describe this action. Bobby pin in the edges of the hairnet, gathering up any slack that might be there.
You could also ask if bun covers are acceptable, this is much easier! (should be available at a dance wear store or maybe even the dance school)
Aw, I got that damned thing to make a bun for my wedding day. I practiced, and practiced. No dice. It takes a village to get that clip on with all your hair in. Don’t sweat it.
So, glad I found you in the 31 DBBB thing
Love=Fun
Dina
@CuriousDina’s last blog post..Which Matters More: The Thought or the Gift?
I really don’t even know what you did there! It looks like origami.
This post was so funny! I am glad I found your blog, your writing is hilarious! Thanks for the laugh, I hope everything works (or already worked) out! Keep up the great blogging!
Amber’s last blog post..Hump Day!
I hate the stress of performance day! I am a hair dresser and my daughter still doubts my abilities to produce the perfect bun. Here is the easiest, fastest, least tear inducing way to the perfect bun.
1) get the hair damp, if its dirty too all the better.
2) gather it into a high, tight ponytail using a thick strong binder.
This is the trick now! From old cotton tights, or dads sport sock cut off the foot so you have a tube. Roll the tube creating a “doughnut”. Cover it with a old nylon a close color to your hair.
3) slide the pony through the doughnut hole.
4) spread the hair over the doughnut and secure with a 2nd binder.
5) wrap the ends of the hair around the base and secure with pins.
6) use hair gel on Strays and you got a perfect bun!
Have fun!
Comments on this entry are closed.