From the moment Jeff proposed, surrounded by rose petals and ivory candles, my mind began dancing with wedding plans. The location, the favors, the menus, the guest list… And the registry. Oh, the registry. Does it get any better than walking around your favorite stores with a scan gun picking out gifts that you are sure to receive? I think not. It was heavenly.
One of the downsides of getting married so young was that we were naive and impressionable. I let his family talk me into registering for fine china and crystal, only to sell it all a few years later when I realized that I was never, ever, going to allow anybody to eat food off of a hundred and fifty dollar plate. I registered for overpriced towels that were no better than their cousins at the discount stores and stemware that required far too much polishing for my lifestyle.
If I had it to do all over again, older and wiser, I’d do the gift part entirely differently. The following is what I wish I’d received, and also a guide for the next time you all want to lavish me with expensive gifts. You’re welcome for making it so easy…
1. Luggage: I’m still packing in the same Eddie Bauer duffel that my mom bought me in college. It would be really nice to have a matching set, and I can’t imagine spending the money now.
2. A Beautiful Bowl: One of my favorite gifts was a glass bowl (that I didn’t register for) from Simon Pearce. I use it for everything from potpourri and sea glass to parfaits and dips. It dresses everything up and makes the simplest trifle look like an elegant treat. I use it more than any other gift.
3. A Tool Kit: Romantic? No. But it would be wonderful to have an electric drill, sets of nails and screws is every size and all of the necessities in one easy to carry case. Perhaps with my new monogram.
4. A Wedding Print: Nine years later, and I still haven’t gotten around to doing anything with my photos other than sticking a few in cheap frames. I would have loved a gift certificate to get my favorites blown up or printed on canvas. I also think the idea of matting and framing the wedding invitation is a beautiful one.
5. Bedding: I can’t get myself to spend real money on nice bedding, but if someone gifted me with it, I’d go to bed singing their praises every night before bed. I’d also really love a cashmere throw.
6. Membership to a Flower of the Month Club: How wonderful would it be to receive a beautiful arrangement of flowers every month for a year after your wedding? I would have adored this. There are also steak clubs or fruit/vegetable memberships that would have been a highlight of every month.
7. A Picnic Basket: I love the idea of getting a basket filled with all the necessities for a romantic lunch on the go. Several years ago, I put one together for my college roommate and her new husband. He opened the gift while his wife was at work and proceeded to put away the cloth napkins, plates and glasses in their kitchen, utterly confused by the gift and not realizing that they were meant to stay in the basket. I still stand by the idea and would love to have one now for family picnics.
8. A Cuisinart: I have no idea why I never registered for this staple, but I bought one for myself last year and it changed my life. I love it.
9. Cooking Classes: Perhaps if we had been gifted with these, Jeff would not have presented me with granola coated chicken he first marinated in Italian dressing. (No, I’m not kidding. I still gag when I recall that meal.)
10. Honeymoon Goodies: My honeymoon in Tahiti was incredible. Perfection. A few things that would have made it even better? A throw-away camera, extra cash, some books or magazines and granola bars. A carry-on containing these would have been appreciated every single day of the trip. A nice dinner at the hotel or a fancy breakfast in bed would have been equally as nice.
What about you— What was your favorite gift? What do you wish you’d asked for? {And what should I get our friends Colby and Eric in two weeks?!}
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This is such a wonderful list, I love every single idea! I think the picnic set and the Flower of the Month are my favorites, but probably if I didn’t cook, the cooking classes would be on the first spot :-)
I love the tool kit idea!
.-= Mama Zen´s last blog ..Your Side Of The Bed =-.
It seems like you’ve got a pretty good list there. I knew I would be getting family china and silver (not that my practical side would have let me register for it anyway – because, surprise, I’ve never used it) but we registered for simple, sturdy stoneware and flatware. I have a friend who has her fancy china and Waterford crystal (Ok, she IS Irish so Waterford is almost a requirement on a bridal registry) in a cabinet and is still eating with a mishmash of dishes and cheap utensils – 8 years after her wedding. So, 9 years later and I’m always happy for the everyday stuff and place settings for 12! (although I’m more than bored with the look of it! HAHA!)
I was really glad I didn’t get married until the ripe old age of 26 :) Ok, not old, but it did give me a chance to learn from a few friends who were married before us. We didn’t like the pressure we felt to spend, spend, spend for every wedding we were invited to (shower gift, bachelor/bachelorette party AND wedding gift) so we did our best to completely de-emphasize gift giving at our wedding. We did register, but didn’t advertise it by sending out those little cards. We have several friends who were struggling financially and we encouraged them not to give us gifts (same with our attendents who had to spend money on dresses, suits, etc.) We didn’t spend a lot on our small, intimate wedding so we weren’t trying to re-cuperate any costs.
Of course, we got some great gifts anyway. One of my favorites (seriously!) was an obviously re-gifted candle holder/candle set from party lite that gives off a nice, soft glow. We only got one Aunt Hilda gift, which was so ugly that I took a picture of it before dropping it off at Goodwill!!! We put the $ from checks we received into our account and used it throughout our first year of marriage to buy any home items we decided we wanted including artwork, a new couch, etc. I’m totally happy with the way it turned out.
I completely agree with you on the luggage (well, you AND Mcmommy! HA!)
The picnic basket, not so much. I sold ours at a garage sale.
We were young when we got married and I was pretty clueless. Although we have used our china on occasion since it’s not THAT ‘fine’ and I didn’t register for crystal or any of that. One of my very favorite gifts that we use ALL THE TIME is a veggie/rice steamer and we still use the almost 10 yr. old one!
And a hand painted vase that a friend of ours made at one of those ‘paint your own pottery’ places that I use every year on our anniversary and Valentine’s for flowers.
.-= Elaine´s last blog ..You Capture – Motion =-.
I have to say, I think this list is genius. And I’m feeling more than a little proud of myself because my wedding gift of choice lately, has been a Simon Pearce bowl. Style and shape to be determined by my impression of the giftees. Still…
And okay, since I’m apparently all about patting myself on the back today, we actually registered at LL Bean for camping stuff. It’s awesome. Of course, we live in New York City and have a two year old now so we, like, never set foot in the forest. But still, it’s there and ready for us when we’re itchin’ to pee in the woods.
Oh and a really good colander. Yeah, that’s worth it.
Snort. That was subtle.
My husband and I come from high class. Oh man so high class. Like prison and trailer parks and such high class. When we got hitched at barely 20 & 22 (to escape our certain dirty diaper, Pall Mall, lost a finger at the mill, doom) a couple of the fabulous gifts we received were:
- a box full of dollar store kitchen gadgets
- 2 broken toasters (one had crumbs in it)
- crochet blanket with gaping holes in it. GAPING.
BUT there must have been some class there because our 2 favorite gifts that we have used Every Single Day for the last 16 years are:
- a crumb box (a slotted box to cut your bread on that came WITH a knife. BONUS!) I had never in my life even seen one of these things and I LOVE it. I can’t properly express my love for this contraption.
- Betty Crocker cook book. Seriously. The red one. I use it every day. I only started cooking about 5 years ago. Until then the only things that came out edible were from that red book. Love it.
But luggage. Oh how handy that would have or would still come in handy. And pretty luggage. Not the green Costco crap that everyone has.
Great list!
.-= AmyAnne´s last blog ..I’m Serious. Mostly. =-.
We did the destination wedding thing with just a few family and friends so we really de-emphasized the gifts since we didn’t invite most people and those we did spent a buttload of money to come see us get married. So we didn’t register. While I wouldn’t change the wedding, I wish I hadn’t made such a fuss about no gifts. What the sam hill was I thinking?
.-= Cara´s last blog ..Every Day =-.
Wow. That list is terrific. I did pretty good on my registry, just the basics. I went wrong with the whole household decor, though. I’ve since given away the Asian inspired paper lantern lights and wooden vases (they don’t go anymore). And I often wonder when the next time will be that I actually use all 12 of my champagne, steiner, red, AND white wine glasses. But it’s nice to have a choice.
What I wish I’d really registered for is money for the honeymoon. We’re still paying that shit off!
.-= Jessica – This Is Worthwhile´s last blog ..Sleeping in the middle of the bed is 2/3 bullshit =-.
Do you believe that I didn’t have a wedding? I didn’t. So I felt guilty about registering. I did register at Wallmart before my shower. Yep. Wallmart. And I made sure that nothing was more than $20. I am such a wierdo. One of my Aunts came to my shower. She gave me $200 in cash and told me that I should have registered for some nice things because I was worth it : ). So, if anyone ever asks me, and I am not sure they will : ) what they should register for, I would say put a few things that are very nice and very special on your list because YOU are very special : ).
.-= Life with Kaishon´s last blog ..My Mom and Car accidents =-.
The best gift we got was MONEY. I was able to buy all the stuff we REALLY wanted but no one got for us.
And, the worst gift? Well, let me put it to you this way: We got both a down comforter and a down featherbed. I have never sweat so much in my whole life. And we lived in Wisconsin!
.-= Texan Mama´s last blog ..The 5 Senses of my Childhood =-.
Jill – I love this post!!! what great gift ideas…I passed this along to my friend who’s newly engaged to give her ideas. The ‘shot out’ to Colby was very cute! So glad you finally got your kitchen aide mixer from Jeff…that was so sweet of him.
I got one of those at my bridal shower and I can’t wait to use it…my shower was over 3yrs ago, but we’ve been living with my in-laws ever since and I refuse to ‘share’ my toys with my mother-in-laws kitchen. So I’m waiting patiently until our house is finished. I have boxes and boxes of lovely dishes, glasses, and appliances all waiting for me to use them! Once this past winter, I broke down and used my kitchen aide mixer to make one of Vanilla Sugar’s cookies (pecan sandies) and it was awesome….then I immediately cleaned and wiped it down and returned it to the box!
Can’t wait to meet you and Jeff next saturday…too bad I can’t meet those precious children of yours (and penelope)!
Jamie
haha…i am just catching up on some of your recent posts and saw my name :) I am so not surprised that you sold most of your wedding gifts..you are too funny. All of your wedding gift ideas sounded great…except for the tool kit. We have too many tools and Eric keeps bringing home more. He wanted me to register at Home Depot! Cant wait to see you guys this weekend!!!
Being old when we got married and my wife having an older sister that was already married, we did pretty well. Still an awful lot of crazy dishes and serving pieces that were either ‘re-gifted’ or otherwise surreptitiously given away. Toolbox is a great idea…
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