Despite the countless wonderful things about having a blog, there are some major negatives that nobody seems to talk about. Trying to visit so many other blogs when there just aren’t enough hours in the day. Obsessing over posting often enough but not boring you all with senseless posts. Remembering that although it sometimes feels like it, this isn’t actually a job. It’s fucking exhausting.
One of the biggest struggles I seem to have is confusing my real life with my blog life. Being crass and sarcastic is all well and good here, but outside of my computer, not so much. And it’s easy to forget that. “No, I just keep getting knocked up” is not an appropriate answer to the dinner party question of whether I work outside of the home. Or, at least the woman whose jaw dropped to the floor didn’t think so. I guess she wouldn’t appreciate it here.
The biggest negative, though, is that I now have tangible evidence of my many failures. Those fifteen pounds I promised would be gone back in December haven’t magically evaporated. Potty training started out with a bang five months ago and I’d say we were farther along back then than we are now. And then there was my vow to take away Ben’s pacifier last May. Here I am, nine months later, and he still gets one to sleep. And that baby who I swore I’d break cold turkey of his paci habit? He’s now totally dependant on that little piece of plastic, sometimes toting around two or three. Just like I promised he’d never be. Crap.
Turns out I’m all talk. Maybe it’s a good thing I have a blog after all.
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Just do what I do and go into your archives and make the necessary adjustments so that you look golden :) it’s called editing… duh!
A cold turkey pacifier break, now that would be something terrible.
Good luck.
Ha ha, thats what makes you normal and human I guess. Everyone (well most people) has good intentions, unfortunately everyday life, lack of discipline, motivation, lazyness and chocolate all get in the way.
I remember my boy would always have two or three dummies (pacifer is called dummy in England). He used to love them – so did I! But when he got around 2 and a half that was it. I started the bribes i.e. chocolate, toys etc in return for him getting rid of those dummies! This eventually did the trick but isn’t it funny how he has been trying to bribe me ever since everytime I ask him to do something. Sigh!
I guess what I am saying is we are all flawed but heart is often in the right place.
JR
Oh Yea, being held accountable sucks. LOL Great post!
AWWW – Hang in there! We all struggle with our own less than perfect aspects, personally, and as parents. We also get to see your successes (and I like to crown you as the playful parent) – like Ben eating spinach.
Your blog has never been boring and your sarcasm and wit are a wonderful part of my day!
A book I have been re-reading said something that might be of “help” in this situation… Have you ever seen a healthy, normally developing teenage who still was not potty trained or still sucking on a pacifier? Both will get it or give it up sooner or later. :)
I think having a back-up pacifier is in fact quite brilliant!
Oh my god you took the thoughts of my head today. I’m feeling the same way! And that is a really funny response to the ‘do you work’ question. I’m bookmarking that one!
I have conversations with family now that includes the phrase…
“Ronda, DO NOT BLOG THIS!”
A year ago…I wouldn’t have had a clue what that meant!
:)
GIRL! Your blog is pablum free, the pacifier will end and potty training will occur. You are way too hard on yourself!
I certainly understand the judgment part…..of how people likely critique our lives.
However, I try very hard to keep perspective and never obligate myself to reading blogs or having to comment.
That becomes a chore…..and eventually less than sincere……and not the reason why I started all of this in the first place. It’s all for fun, right?
And, you just keep that precious pacifier sucking little guy happy. They’re only little once. What’s the rush? As a wise person once told me…..”It will happen…..relax…..I don’t know any adults who are not potty trained.”
Oh good, you’re normal…… ;)
Don’t be so hard on yourself, everything in good time. Your sweet boy won’t go to college with a paci, he’ll have given it the heave ho by then.
No worries…..
All great moms pick their battles, right?
He is adorable.
My son had his nummy until he was almost 4. When he is ready, he is ready…….
Oh my goodness, is that a back-up pacifier hanging from his jammies? Oh that is too funny. The kid comes packing! He is prepared huh?
Don’t feel you have to comment on every single post; I could never do that. We still love you comment or no comment.
That is why I love blog world! Remember, my almost 4 year old is a major paci addict. And it is a dirty family secret outside of blogworld.
But doesn’t it feel so good to get it off your chest?
I would have paid money to see that woman’s face when you said it.
Ha! Don’t feel so bad…my girls still have binkies when they sleep and they are 3 1/2. But dang it, everyone sleeps well and that is SO important. I can relate to so many things in this post and am glad you are here to share it with the rest of us blogging mamas!
god, give it a break. you have 3 kids. so what if he has a paci. he’s not going to have one in college. Things happen when they happen. the important thing is that they are 3 crazy happy kids and 2 happy parents. xo
Oh man, I laughed and laughed when I read that you said “i just keep getting knocked up!” That lady should have had a better sense of humor- I would have made you my new best friend.
I am with you on the binkie scenario. We are supposedly doing binkies only in bed, but the second that kid is whiny- I shove it in!
I think you are doing great!
Your kids are happy and thriving..that’s all that matters. When you HAVE to take care of it (paci) stock up on the alcohol. You’ll need it! ;)
(hopefully he’ll suprise you and you won’t need it….well you can save it!)
I love the eating on the floor story. I am a horrible mother, I threaten to GIVE it to the dog. And then I do. But when Max was littler we had a game: “Tra-la-laa, here’s mama at the beach (the spoonful of food) hmmmm, why is no-one else here? I hope there isn’t a giant SEA MONSTER eating everyone on the… OH NOOOO! AAARRRGH!” (He eats Mama.) “And now here comes daddy, ‘oh where oh where can my wife be? I TOLD her about the sea monster, I hope she didn’t AAAAARGGHH!!!’” (he eats daddy, and goes on to devour his entire family, including pets, teachers and neighbours.) MUCH more fun than a choo-chooo train, but if my son grows up to be a psychopath you’ll know why! I guarantee your little angel will loooove this game!
Oh, and you can add the marines, in a submarine and a sea-monster research vessel AND a search helicopter if you like. The possibilities are endless!
These are my sentiments exactly, but I love blogging soo…I will continue. I love reading your posts, so..even though this can be somewhat comparable to a job..please keep em coming!
That was sooo funny! I seriously feel your pain though. Blogging takes a ton of time. There must be an easier way!
Have a great week!
Love and Prayers,
Tim
I’m glad you are talking about it…because I feel the same way sometimes…pressure to come up with something that will make people laugh…and some days, I’m just not funny, in fact most days I’m not!
But I feel ya, I get ya!
The lack of time to visit everyone I want to on a regular basis is killing me! I don’t know how to balance it all. Help:)
too funny – my kids always say – momma you gonna work now! – Yep I am!
I hear you on visiting all the other blogs. The more you read the more I bookmark, the more I can’t get to.
We had a bye, bye ceremony with the bottle and my son dropped them all into the recycling. It actually worked – you could try something like that with the pacifier.
OH my goodness that picture of Evan is priceless. It could be an exact shot of our baby too. Don’t sweat it… he’ll get rid of it eventually.
I really loved this post. You KNOW I did. But really, you are very good and I hope you keep going but find a good balance.
Scary Mommy – Keepin’ it honest since 2008.
I agree with Rhonda’s Rants, I too get the “don’t blog this” from family members too.
Blogging is SO much a part of my life now. I should be cleaning, playing with my children, or getting ready for my class tonight, but instead I SWEAR I am just going to jump online and check my mail.
Catchy blog post titles suck me into the Blogosphere that we love. I can’t read a good post with out a good comment (hence the “Comment Junkie” tshirt from SITS I am wearing right now)
I couldn’t imaging the pressure from having 262 followers (no pressure!) I have 7 that say they follow, and thanks to Statcounter, I know of at least 30 more a day that lurk me.
I am just me. I use this to vent. To record memories, and to just amuse those who are entertained by my thoughts.
I have to say I have always been the sarcastic in real life, and comments like “T.V.’s broke so we just make babies” is often what I will say to Spaghetti’s family that asks when I will get a job outside of the home.
Well enough rambling from me. I have to say though, just be you. The you that started this blog in the first place, your followers should love you for you, and your posts.
Feisty
Some of those things might be impossible. Sophia is totally ready to be potty trained. She likes to go potty (especially with me), she can do it all (take off her pants, toilet paper, and flushing) and she knows just before she has to go, she often tells me when she is going potty. BUT SHE DOESN’T WANT TO GIVE UP THE BABY ASPECT OF DIAPERS. She likes her panties for a while and then she wants a diaper. We have been working on it for a year but she isn’t interested in giving up diapers.
I have no idea what I am going to do about Fifi’s paci addiction. The thing is, my RL friends could care less about that, but you and others want to talk about it and relate to it.
So, anyways, what are we going to do about it.
it is so true…I look back to the things I was whining about a year ago…and think, hmm, I am still whining about that now.
Oh well…such is life, right?
right???
:)
What a cute little boy. As a mom, you just do the best with what you’ve got…don’t beat yourself up! Have a Happy Wordful Wednesday!
He’s SUPER cute! And probably he won’t still have the plug when he is going off to college…
Oh that is sooooo a picture for his engagment party in 25 years…hilarious. You mena real life and blog life are different…crap, is that what’s wrong over here?
you are singing my song. I so know where you are coming from but yet I just can’t stop with the blogging. I guess that is why its an addiction.
I agree with Jen, you’re “singing to the choir” – put it another way, if we stopped blogging then we’d have to find another addiction to cope with daily living. In my situation I’m guessing that it wouldn’t be nearly as healthy as this.
Such a cute photo! I set those goals too and find I am my own worst critic. Nice to see I am not alone. One day the binky fairly will arrive to take it away and he won’t need it any more. Those who don’t understand, usually don’t have kids! Thanks for sharing your adventures.
You are right on with this post.
Keeping up with reading and commenting on others blogs while trying to maintain your own is like a full time job. It’s hard to keep everything in perspective.
Your little one with his paci is ADORABLE!
You always make me laugh. I feel the downside of a blog often times too! At least you always have your hot mamma blogger thing to keep you going! :)
I wouldn’t take the pacifier away either, I mean look how dang cute he is with it! Good thing you are “all talk” – love that! : )
When he looks THAT adorable with a paci in his mouth…it would be a crime to take it away!! :)
lol I think I can relate.. I have often asked myself the same question… To Blog or Not To Blog. You aren’t alone. There will always be something that takes our attention makes us forget our goals, and remind us of our failures. Why do you think I still have a Weight Loss Blog after a year? LOL I gained 20 lbs back UGH lol
A-d-o-r-a-b-l-e-
cut paci when child is not looking, say, broke, then raise hands in wonder and ask, you wanna throw it away for mommy. ; )
You are so funny! Sometimes I don’t come for a few days, and then when I do, I LAUGH my head off and wonder how I could ever stop coming here : ).
I think you are an awesome Mom. Real as can be. I love real.
Have you ever seen a kid at kindergarten with a pacifier? Yeah, me either. He will eventually quit. I wouldn’t stress. Life is TOO short!
these are thoughts that run through my head on a daily basis. that and wondering if anyone actually reads and enjoys the shit I think is hysterical. we need to just figure out how to make the blog our real life – our paying life. that way, telling someone “getting knocked up” is your job would be totally normal!
I just fell in love……..
LOL! That was too funny and a great picture too boot!
I did the cold turkey paci with 2 out of 3 kids. As hard as I thought it was going to be it really wasn’t! I just told them is got lost and I got rid of ALL evidence. The store quit making them, I’m sorry baby. They both said “ok” and that was it. You feel so guilty doing it.
Ok, so I am not a mom and therefore know NOTHING (repeat nothing) about this. That said, I saw on super nanny where they had the paci-fairy come. Have you seen this? I was totally amazed it worked, and she used it on several different families.
And give yourself a break – you’re doing a great job!!!
It’s all good. I’m not going to repeat everything that was said before me.
Except the part about getting knocked up all the time. Whatta HOOT.
My kiddo is 11 and *still* walks around with his blanket. No, he calls it nothing but “blue blanket”. He’s so old, dude.
High-five! But don’t worry, we’re all in the boat with you! ;-) LOL
I’m a lot of talk too!!! That is the most adorable baby boy every!!! I’d have a hard time making that baby do anything he didn’t want – least of all give up his binky – awwwwwwe!
Take care – Kellan
he is a certifiable cutie.
nice article, i can totally relate w. how u feel on blogging, sometimes i forget this is not a job! hahaha re: potty training i had the same problem with my son, i thought we were getting there but then not quite. but i was patient with him until such time he was the one who showed interest in NOT wearing his diapers anymore.
he’s almost 3 though but 99% potty trained. anyway good luck with that.
Hope you start making some real dough on this blog…cause you deserve it,… You always make me laugh! (I was supposed to leave 20 lbs before I left for Rome… – 2weeks & have gained 5 instead…Sigh…)
I can tell you from experience that forcing the issue with the pacifier is not a good way to go.
Case in point: My kids.
I did NOT want children who had soothers at age 7.
My children are 18 months apart. When we started weaning Kid 1, he was ready. He pretty much gave it up on his own. He decided, he called the shots.
For Kid 2, we thought ourselves so excellent that a couple of months later, we tried weaning HER. Notice the age difference, her parents forgot. She WASN’T ready. So she compensated by sticking her thumb in her mouth.
She’s 8 now. Her teeth are fudged up and she still sucks that stupid thumb. We aren’t sure what to do now.
Did you stop & then start following again? Or is this blogger screwing around again? (feel like you are one of the few I can actually ask about the stop/start following….) Not sure I like the new lay out… eeek
This is why blogworld is better than the real world!
And don’t forget the time your child screamed “Noooooo!!!” and broke down in tears when he saw you walking toward your computer that one day… Oh wait, that was mine… Eh, I’m sure it happens to everybody. Right?
You know what, I don’t know how you do it, or all the other witty women who do it. I think I have it a bit easier because my blogging incorporates my other hobby which is the cooking so I just post about what I cook. If I didn’t I wouldn’t be able to come up with the funny crap you do. Not that it’s crap. hah. But I do get what you’re saying. It’s hard sometimes.
he’s such a little cutie!
and i couldn’t agree more about blogging being so awesome and so freakin’ exhausting! sometimes i wonder why i spend so much time doing it? but, i do love it – most days.
and you’re a great mom!
I hear ya about chore that blogging sometimes seems…
And I’m pretty sure I’ve gained a few pounds since joining Operation Skinny Bitch….
Fuck it.
RIGHT THERE with you on the passie struggle. ((huge sigh))
I am completely with you about the negatives of blogging. Sometimes there can be a lot of pressure to not be boring and to write things that will keep people coming back for more.
LOL I’m new to your blog. I love that picture of your little one. It made me think about when I was desperately trying to wean my own off his. Eventually, he needed one for his mouth and one for each hand…seriously! We were definitely going in the wrong direction lol. It will happen eventually and one day you will be looking at pictures of someone else’s child with a binky in their mouth feeling all nostalgic for these days :)
I JUST saw this post in my reader and realized 2 things…
A- YES Blogging is like a job– I obess about the very same things. I hadnt posted in almost a week or visited in a week— which is what brings me out to blog land tonight lol
B- DAMN IT I had forgotten to resubscribe to your new feed!
However, I am happy to announce- I have since fixed the feed in my reader.. and Im all subscribed up again :)
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