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01 · 07 · 2012
Tagged as: see mom and dad -- I am using that graphic design degree!

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© Copyright 2012 Jill Smokler. Scary Mommy reserves the right to use all message board postings, confessions, and comments anonymously, in any medium.

{ 232 comments }
Hahahaha!!!!
oh so funny! i bet this is true story for so so many :)
Devan @ Accustomed Chaos recently posted..Mixed Feelings About a New Chapter
Lmao
Oh my…..I LOVE this! Pinning RIGHT NOW!!!!
Rachel {at} Mommy Needs a Vacation recently posted..My Not-So New Years Resolutions: A Look Back
Wow… It’s like déjà vue!
Maija @ Maija’s Mommy Moments recently posted..The Truth About Kraft Dinner Smart
Fantastic! So sad, so funny, so happy, and so true.
Kristin recently posted..Glad I Saw It: Elf House
Oh Em Gee! Fucking HILARIOUS! Best Picture EVER!
Dawn @ Life Unscripted recently posted..Fears
So funny and so true! ;-)
love this.
so honest, so you
xoxo momma!
vanillasugarblog recently posted..coconut clusters
This is simply fantastic. I am hoping to avoid this rotation this time around. We already have 3!
Amanda @ The Eco-Friendly Family recently posted..Be the Anti-Bully
Amen, sister.
Love it!!
Toni @ Carrigan’s Joy recently posted..Something I Need Daily…
Absolutely. Brillliant.
Alison@Mama Wants This recently posted..Tasty Thursday: Chocolate Sea Salt Cookies
It’s brilliant—I think you captured it perfectly! Can I get a poster-sized version? It would explain so much to my family at the moments when they think I am completely nuts.
a Book for My Daughter recently posted..Neglect
Ohhhh, I might have to do that!!!
Please do!!!!
it’s like it’s me, just missing the pee dripping down my leg and the boobs down to my belly button
Not a Perfect Mom recently posted..30 is the New 60
I *knew* I forgot something!
Honestly, you are FUCKING AWESOME!!! LMAO!!!!!!!!!!
1) Put this under “most popular” right now. No go ahead, I’ll wait.
2) How much did your graphic design degree cost? Whatever it cost was worth it for the fantastic yet aesthetic image of pregnancy-induced flatulence.
3) Sell as a poster. Or coffee mug. Or both. I’m buying!
Alexis@TroublesomeTots recently posted..What You Need to Know About Sleeping Through the Night Part 2
Best comment ever!
I need the coffee mug.
Me too.
Not Supermom recently posted..A Post In Which I Wax Poetic About Dust Bunnies
That devil baby with the heart dropping from the diaper? Hahaha! So awesome.
Mama Kat recently posted..This One Time My Husband Went To Starbucks
Love this!
Very funny! Thank god for the afternoon quickie!
x
Mrs BC recently posted..Rich Glen Olive Oil – Giveaway
I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. So true!
Stephanie recently posted..Crappy New Year
OMG it’s my life in pictures
SoberJulie recently posted..Friday Funny~A 6yr old & an iPad
OMG, this is so totally me, except I had to stop at the first child!
I LOVE this. Can I Pin it?
Tara recently posted..Playdate
Please do!
Yep, that pretty much sums it up. We should distribute that in high schools!
Ali recently posted..WTF Wednesday – The "Really Trippy Dream" Edition
I totally agree Ali! I bet we would have alot less teen pregnancies then!
incredibly funny, I agree with others…you should make it poster size!!
zolemia recently posted..New Year, New Road…Eyes wide open
OH sweetie, this is why I only had one. add to that I never puked or had issues to deal with makes me the most wimpiest mom EVER.
Excellent!
…and Stick Chick throws a pretty powerful left hook — lol
Amy recently posted..Beginnings: This Moment ~Friday Ritual
That’s so awesome you probably didn’t even need the text. ;)
Robin | Farewell, Stranger recently posted..My One Word
I teared up a bit on this one. Having some baby fever these days….. but not anymore. Thanks!!
Shitting hearts? That totally sold me.
Oh, my goodness. So, so, so, so true. The afternoon quickie kills me!
Recovering Supermom recently posted..Being a Nice Girl and Not Yelling
Oh my gosh. LOVE this Jill! So flippin’ funny : )
Life with Kaishon recently posted..City or Country?
OMG that is so hilarious. And so true. LOVED IT.
This took some serious mad skills! Way to get it all down so creatively!!
Kristen recently posted..An Obsession From The Past…
You are a GENIUS!!!! Seriously– is there anything you can’t do?!?!
Talented, creative and super fertile!
By Word of Mouth Musings recently posted..Wordy Wordless Wednesday. One Word.
this is hilarious
jennifer beer recently posted..Lessons learned
This is just plain awesome!
Insane Mamacita recently posted..Dealing with Mental Illness
Ha! This was EXCELLENT! Bravo! LOL! ;)
Vanessa
Ha! Love it – I am smack dab right on one of those steps right now!
Robyn Wright of RobynsOnlineWorld.com recently posted..Sharpie Heaven
This is fantastic!! Well worth the $100k degree. ;)
Jocelyn @ ScooterMarie recently posted..A very Maui Christmas
So, so funny. And so, so true!
Just Jennifer recently posted..I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.
Why the fuck did I marry you…lmbo. LOVE! xo
tracy recently posted..Project 365 Week 1
so true
Mercy recently posted..How We’ve Grown This Year, part 3
Hehe. That’s about right! And I’m sure it won’t take long after I pop this one out before I’ll have baby fever again. ;)
Kimberly recently posted..There’s Nothing Like Having Your Grammar Corrected By a Two-Year-Old
haha hilarious!
happened to me too! i used to be so fun!
Elizabeth Santana recently posted..THINGS I AM LOVING AT THE MOMENT
Hahahhah I love this. If I had kids, it would be me for sure.
Mayor Gia recently posted..I Made a Links Page! And other randomness.
Scarily accurate. :-)
Kelly K @ Dances with Chaos recently posted..Blame It on the Squirrel… and My 400th Post
This is so funny and oh so true, you hit the nail on the head.
Karin @Mommy’s Paradise recently posted..The mysterious rash – did we get rid of the eczema? (part 1)
the reappearance of baby fever is what scares me the most! So hysterical!
wendy @ mama one to three recently posted..The History of Sleep
People should seriously be handed this document when getting their marriage license at the courthouse. LOL
Barbara recently posted..Weekly Fitness Wrap Up #1
Are you trying to tell us you are pregnant?!?
Also look at your shiny new book. Sooooo pretty. Can’t wait to read it!
Christine @ Quasi Agitato recently posted..Dear Mom With The Rosaries,
Lord, NO! Just how I ended up with the three I have.
Hilarious! I love your artwork almost as much as your writing.
Julia’s Child / Sarah P. recently posted..Another Thing My Children Had to Teach Me
Yep. Looks familiar : )
ML @ My 3 Little Birds recently posted..What I Wish to Share: Our Kindergarten vs. Preschool Decision
Request: To frame and hang this over my bed.
Lady Estrogen recently posted..Hello there, Drama!
Agreed!
Love!!!
Fanstistic!
LMBO LMBO OMGoodness that is soooo funny! Flashbacks. lol
You must sell this. Because we will buy! Brilliant.
Couple of comments:
1. Market this in poster size to every school across the Nation. This is all they need to show girls for sex ed.
2. When is this coming out as a poster? I soooo need this.
3. Every penny spent for your graphic design degree has just paid off!
Jen recently posted..High Anxiety Time!
Really Really Funny Pic ;)
Hystericalness!
imperfectmomma recently posted..for you friday
Hahahahahah!!!! This is priceless!!
um, can we say t-shirts, please?
;-)
Erin Margolin recently posted..Shattering the Clay
I would be laughing if I hadn’t done this 3 times. And it would have been more if DH hadn’t had the snip. LMAO
Scarily talented mommy is what you are-a poster would be perfect -might go nicely with the book launch. Just sayin’. This is awesome.
Jill, I absolutely love this. Brilliant and so very true!
This is built to be pinned, and printed, and framed. Bridal shower gift? ;)
LOVE this SO much!!!!
Fucking perfect!
Friggin’ hysterical!!
I might print that thing out on big fat giant paper and hang it by my bed.
Birth control. Cheap, funny birth control.
Carrie recently posted..A really bad cough you totally try to ignore isn’t the only lame thing in life.
It’s funny, but I can’t help but feel sad that you view motherhood this way. Do you enjoy it at all?
So if she can laugh at it, she doesn’t enjoy it? Not following you at all here.
Tragic Sandwich recently posted..Stubborn Little Girl
Neebie here.
I’m flummoxed. What do these drawings mean? Are you poking fun of your life, or are you serious?
I wonder if maybe your husband and you would benefit from some marriage counseling. It can’t be healthy to not be able to stand him most of the time but freely give your heavenly temple (body) to him in an afternoon of carnality.
If you’d like any information regarding counseling, OR coming unto Christ please email me. I’d LOVE to speak with you about the meaning of life.
::headdesk::
For realz?
Not Supermom recently posted..A Post In Which I Wax Poetic About Dust Bunnies
Uhhh, its called satire?
Seriously?
Dawn @ Life Unscripted recently posted..Become: Shopping Your Way
Oh, Christ…
Exactly.
Tragic Sandwich recently posted..Stubborn Little Girl
Lmfao!!
Facepalm.
Humor is lost on some people.
Step away from the internet! Not everything you read is 100% true and serious.
I doubt you know the meaning of life, If your sense of humour is this dry. I often wondered If anyone thought of marriage and motherhood as I do. Ofcourse she enjoy’s it but she’s also just showing that it, like anything else in life comes with it’s own set of challenges. Really tho? Dragging Christ into this?
Let’s cut to the chase. You are saying something to the effect of “God says thou Shalt Swallow.”
Damn, that is my kind of religion. :D
Jack@TheJackB recently posted..It Is Not Cute When I Act Like a Father
::snort::
I’m reasonably certain that’s the 11th commandment.
Not Supermom recently posted..A Post In Which I Wax Poetic About Dust Bunnies
ROFLMAO! <3
1 Bad Mom recently posted..Online Mom Groups – The Good, the Bad, & the Judgmental Little Twits
Best. Comment. Ever.
Damn, I just snorted hot coffee thru my nose. Did I hip just abuse my temple????
Jack: Best. Response. Ever.
seriously Linda? A few rules I have learned reading ScaryMommy.
1. We do not disuss the meaning of life – We vent about it
2. Our gracious host puts the insanity that is having children and a marriage into words and makes us laugh
3. Please refer back to number one and have fun… a bottle of wine or a vodka slushie help – OH and if you don’t like the word FUCK please reconsider your subscription.
You are so right Maribel. I love this website because finally I feel like I’m not alone in this crazy world of motherhood and wife. Some posts make me laugh and some make me say OMG me too, and yet others make me thankful. But we are all on here to vent and feel sane again after. Some people just think that they are better then everyone else and really need to take a look in the mirror.
PLEASE tell me how to make that vodka slushie … I need it. :)
Mercy recently posted..How We’ve Grown This Year, part 3
Ingredients:
12 ozs orange juice (frozen)
12 ozs lemonade
48 ozs pineapple juice
1 cup sugar
3 cups water
1 cup vodka (rum or gin or brandy)
club soda or 7-UP
1 Mix all ingredients together and freeze in large container.
2 To Serve: Mix 1 part slush to 1 part club soda or 7-UP.
3 ENJOY and say FUCK IT
From the (not for miles yet) Dutch equivalent of Scary Mommy… Amen!
Thank you, you could not have said it better. We just need to leave Linda right in her little corner..poor thing she probably does not even smile.
Oh please don’t do this. Please don’t make people who believe in God look bat shit crazy with your uptight antiquated Jesus-speak. “Heavenly temple”? Barf!! “Coming onto Christ”??? That does not even make sense.
Look honey, God has a hard enough time without people like you “representing” Him with your 1880′s language and complete lack of sense of humor.
Seriously, as a Christian I am frustrated at people like you. God has a sense of humor you know.
Lighten up will ya?
THANK YOU. Oy.
Karen recently posted..2012: The Year Of The Girl
AMEN!
And He doesn’t mind that we do too … pass the booze so this mommy can chill.
And if you think drinking a little to relax is bad, don’t forget that Jesus’ first miracle was making wine. Whoo hoo!
Mercy recently posted..How We’ve Grown This Year, part 3
I bet you want to vote for Santorum.
Jennifer recently posted..#Project365/366, Week 1
Loved this response! Favorite so far.
Jacki recently posted..New Year’s Resolution Progress Report – Still Kickin’ It
Oh wow. You went there. I bow to your low brow.
For the love of all that is good in life please do not think Linda is a reflection of the majority of Christians!
Dear woman would be shocked by my Christian/recovering alcoholic view of life….and certainly couldn’t have brought me to Christ.
SoberJulie recently posted..Asking For Your Help Today
A to the Men Julie … also Hell to the No ;)
People, really …. insert eye roll and head shake …
This thread is hilarious!
You know, I am my most turned on when my husband and I are getting on each other’s nerves. A little argument turns into some playful banter which then turns into teasing (2 different forms if you know what I mean), and then we are rolling in the proverbial hay having that biblical carnal knowledge of one another.
Sometimes, it also involves some spanking.
1 Bad Mom recently posted..Online Mom Groups – The Good, the Bad, & the Judgmental Little Twits
Woooo!!
Not Supermom recently posted..A Post In Which I Wax Poetic About Dust Bunnies
Geez, “neebie,” read the rest of this satrical blog and realize you are trying to convert a Jew, a hilarious one.
Im a Jew, I think the poster is funny.
I just keep getting the giggles that anyone can possibly miss the humor in your hilarious pic-post… UNLESS this comment was posted with Tongue in Cheek HUMOR.
If the humor really was lost on poor Linda, I think maybe she might benefit from some counseling… to find her sense of it!
Keep on makin’ us laugh Jill! :)
MommaC recently posted..The Give-A-Shit gene
Linda….as a Christian I don’t understand
How you think it is wrong for her and her husband to have sex freely!!!! God wants sex in a marriage!!! It’s one of the greatest gifts from Him! And every husband and wife on earth fight and get on each others nerves…A LOT!!! Even pastors and their wives argue….it’s human nature!!!! I am a single mom and my husband used to get on my nerves too!!!! We would argue, makeup and have sex!!! What is it that is wrong with sex??? If I wanted to have crazy wild sex with my husband that was 100% ok and amazing!!! I hate being single now becuase I miss sex!!!
I can’t even take this seriously. You are joking, right? This is a fake comment. It has to be. No one says “heavenly temple” in reference to their bodies in real life! thanks for the laugh, Linda! :D
MamaBug recently posted..Metamorphosis
This comment made my laugh and cry.
Laugh : well that is an obvious one, sorry.
Cry: I can’t remember the last time I when I had an afternoon of carnality.
Time to book a holiday sans kids.
Tinne from Tantrums and Tomatoes recently posted..Traditions where meant to be carried on, especially when they involve beans
Can we all lay hands on Linda and pray for a sense of humor please?
Jamee @ A New Kind of Normal recently posted..Day 9: Latest Purchase
I think I might need some counselling, oh wait…. I no longer have ‘afternoons of carnality’ I have kids instead.
This must be a joke, the language alone is out of the Ark, – pun intended.
Maybe it is because I am pagan, but “coming unto Christ” sounds dirty
^Bwhahahaahahahahaahahaha.
Seriously?? This was funny. I love your blog.
OMG! I can’t quit laughing at Linda’s comment!!!!
I.. just… but… REALLY?
Wow.
Evin Cooper recently posted..Why I don’t drink..
I would LOVE to talk to you about the meaning of humor….and quickies for that manner.
::snort::
Tottums recently posted..These are a few of my favorite apps …
LMAO, bwahahahaha! She wants you to come on to Christ!
lol~!
LMFAO!
Love recently posted..Where is YOUR willie ?
I think that this is hysterical, just feel sorry for those that are too uptight to see it as the humor it is…
Please inquire about the counseling just to screw with her.
Yes, but then her holy temple might get struck by lightning.
Shannonannon recently posted..More Nativity Adventures
This is hilarious. I pinned it because it’s so awesome, it needs to be shared.
To the idiots who don’t understand satire or humor in general: you can love your marriage and kids while still acknowledging that sometimes you want to lock them all in a closet.
Nicole recently posted..Enter the Dinosaur
Aftermoon carnality? Oh honey, she has kids. That particular sin has to wait until the kids are in bed.
Hilarious though. Please forward this to all schools teaching the joke of sex Ed classes. Maybe the prissy ass little snots would take the hint if they thought of losing their precious perky boobs or shiny new belly ring!
I don’t remember a ‘romantic’ period between kid 1 and 2. I think my eyes were closed but not… Well fill in the blanks! Har de har har.
Your diagram is 100% accurate. Just because our kids and husband frustrate us to no end, doesn’t mean we love them any less. I would walk through fire for my husband and kids, and fight the devil himself for them. However, they also drive me crazy on a daily basis. It’s just a part of life.
I second this.
Mercy recently posted..How We’ve Grown This Year, part 3
Linda is a nutball ! Go meet her
For counciling and punch her for me – I’m sure she drives the minivan while her husband in his khaki’s sits
In the passenger seat all good and obedient.
Oh my. Really? Maybe she shouldn’t read your blot if she cant understand humor. People like that crack me up. Your husband should never get on your nerves….what’s wrong with you? Lmfao!!
Ummmm maybe because God sees a reason for testing their relationship. And why you should have a problem with a husband and wife consecrating their marriage, under ANY circumstances is beyond anyone’s scope of understanding. “Judge not, lest ye be judged.” Who the hell cares what she does, or why? It’s not like she’s asking you to watch and take notes.
Linda, You really are a newbie….omg, you are the lost one, not Jill! You clearly do not belong on SM… I think you need counciling!
Great job Jill! Keep up the awesome work! SM reassures me everyday that I am no alone! Love it!
That is spot on! You should make t-shirts with this post and we will all buy one!
Autherine@BoysRising recently posted..Finding Your Happy Place During Stressful Times
This is great. There should be a poster in each gynecologist office. It would be great birth control. Lol
Yes!
“It can’t be healthy to not be able to stand him most of the time but freely give your heavenly temple (body) to him in an afternoon of carnality.” BEST LINE EVER! LOLZ!
How many bad romance novels do I have to read before I start using phrases like “afternoon of carnality”?
Two.
Not Supermom recently posted..A Post In Which I Wax Poetic About Dust Bunnies
Preferably with Fabio on the cover.
bawhahahahahaha….
Amy recently posted..Beginnings: This Moment ~Friday Ritual
Are you freaking kidding me!? Heavenly temple? Carnality? Who says that stuff!? Wow.
The graphic is priceless. And I will never recover from the most fantastic comment in the history of blogging.
anymommy recently posted..A penny earned
I second that….. =)
Amy recently posted..Beginnings: This Moment ~Friday Ritual
Why do people who don’t understand or like what you say following you to begin with??? Go to stepford wives.com or perfect mommy.org instead! Wtf? What did she think scary mommy was all about anyway?
I am laughing so hard the tears are running down my leg! (both SM’s graphic and Linda). Please, please, don’t ever stop. You, and all your supporters, make me realize I am actually sane! Hugs.
me too!
Amy recently posted..Beginnings: This Moment ~Friday Ritual
“tears are running down my leg”? Best.comment.ever! You have coined my favorite new phrase!
“heavenly temple” Bwaaaaaahhhh Ha ha ha.
That’s the best laugh I’ve had all day.
Clearly she has not breastfeed any babies. My boobs are most definitely not heaven-bound anymore.
I love a good old-fashioned Bible-thumping commenter. They’re always good for a nostril-clearing snort.
tracey just another mom recently posted..The Cutest Puppy Ever
Holy shit. Can’t speak. Can barely see. Tears. Lmfao! Laughed so hard I started coughing and choked.
“Come unto Christ.” Seriously? Does he watch?
Can’t stop laughing. Woke hubby up!
Best graphic ever!
I really am a”newbie”here,and I am so glad that I found my way here…I really needed to laugh and that’s exactly what I have done..I love it here,thanks guys!!!
I feel sorry for the person locked in judgment hell who cannot see the absolute hilarity and truth in this! Live a little, people! Ha!
Kristy @PampersandPinot recently posted..Sunday Stealing
Bwa ha ha ha!!! OMG – that is so me. I thought motherhood would be total bliss, and I was so wrong.
1 Bad Mom recently posted..Online Mom Groups – The Good, the Bad, & the Judgmental Little Twits
While I do enjoy satire and humor and believe you are clever, witty, and successful and often reveal what many mother’s may feel in their minds, I can’t help but wonder how these writings will be viewed by your teenage children one day? Notably, they are being raised to be intelligent, clever and honest with their feelings and to work hard to achieve their goals as their hard-working mother has. Will this come at a cost to their skills development and civility in society or will it simply continue to be a humorous outlet for parenting?
Sometimes, parenting is like a science project. What will be your results based on your hypothesis and thesis? Who really knows?
I think it would be a far worse consequence if mommy kept all her feelings inside, lost it and went on a murder / suicide rampage in her house like many mothers have b/c they don’t know how to talk about their feelings and let shit out in a healthy way or make fun of their lives and not take the horrible shit too seriously.
1 Bad Mom recently posted..Online Mom Groups – The Good, the Bad, & the Judgmental Little Twits
3 points for bringing murder/suicide rampage to the game. The stakes have just been upped.
Tracy recently posted..The Long Hair Cold War
Seriously….no wait….seriously?? The trolls are really out tonight, aren’t they? I am sure Scary Mommy’s relationship with her children is fully intact, and I’m sure her kids will laugh and say, yep, that is our Mom’s sense of humor! Wow–some people REALLY need a good bottle of Jack Daniel’s to help them lighten up!
jules from A Little Bite of Life recently posted..Beauty And The Beast in 3D/Tangled Ever After!
“Sometimes, parenting is like a science project. What will be your results based on your hypothesis and thesis? Who really knows?”
Lol! My parents would tell me that I (eldest of two) was the guinea pig. They said the first kid always ended up screwed up because we were the experiment.
Maribel and Common Sense Mom mixed with Scary Mommy equals WINNING!
HAHAHAHAHA “give your heavenly temple to him freely” I feel like she must get all dressed up in her best dress and say in her best 1-800 voice “tonight, I’m going to freely give my heavenly temple to you.” hahahaah feel so sorry for that lady’s husband! “carnality”? No thanks, I fuck my man, whether I love him that day or not! Haha
Youngmomma recently posted..Today.
Oh Linda, please don’t ever read *my* blog. You’ll probably burst into flames. Lighten up, sweetie. If you’re a mom and can’t see the truth in this then I’ll skip the counseling, thanks, and just have a sip of the Kool-Aid you’re drinking.
Humorless people suck
Dani recently posted..Facebook and the Friend Collector
Its almost 10 pm here…since I passed on an afternoon of carnality, I guess I will shoot for an evening of it instead ;)
Jen recently posted..High Anxiety Time!
I snorted. I eyerolled. I coughed. I sneezed. My head is SO confused at the torment I put it through simply reading the comments. My body stopped being a temple the moment the first stretch mark showed up, and that was LONG before kiddos. Afternoon of carnality?? Have you ever been married lady? You stop having those when he says I do! *SMH* I wonder why she hasn’t bothered to comment again?
My email: corrected!
Stephanie bishop recently posted..Teaching service to kids: Red Bag project
Email
Stephanie bishop recently posted..Teaching service to kids: Red Bag project
I’m glad I’ve given so many of you a good laugh. That was definitely not my intention.
I’m sure you mean well, but anyone in marketing (not just me) can tell you that you need to target your message to your audience–and that starts with listening, to make sure you know who your audience is.
Read more, comment less would be my suggestion–otherwise you risk making people unreceptive, which I suspect is the opposite of your intention.
Tragic Sandwich recently posted..Stubborn Little Girl
I love you all, you make me feel “normal” (well, almost!)
and I wanna T-shirt!
PattiH recently posted..Saturdays are for …
I laughed so hard at this post and all the comments, I woke up the snoring beast on my couch. *smh* Maybe since he’s awake now, he’d like to come worship my temple for a little bit…
Love recently posted..Photo
I am just so entertained by reading this thread… goodness!
Not all Christian mothers and wives have their buns in such a tight knot. I just read the blog entry I will post below and was again incredibly validated in the role I play as a down & dirty mama, day in and day out. I may choose not to use f-bombs, but using them or not does not take away from the absolute exhaustion that being a wife & mother is, nor does using them or not communicate the reward of being a wife & mother. Sheesh, Linda.
http://momastery.com/blog/2012/01/04/2011-lesson-2-dont-carpe-diem/
Being all high & mighty also doesn’t make marriage and motherhood any less exhausting, either. I have to quote this comment as it summed up my feelings exactly.
“Just because our kids and husband frustrate us to no end, doesn’t mean we love them any less. I would walk through fire for my husband and kids, and fight the devil himself for them. However, they also drive me crazy on a daily basis. It’s just a part of life.”
Laura recently posted..a Christmas post.
Oh, and Jill — How dare you use a picture of Spawn without our permission!! LMAO
I want you to show this design to the ‘rents and get back to us on that whole “using my degree” idea LOL
Love recently posted..The Trash Fairy
Best. Infographic. Ever.
Tragic Sandwich recently posted..Stubborn Little Girl
Now that’s what I call love.
Seriously, she didn’t mean harm. She takes things literally, let’s move on. The post was awesome enough to make DH laugh, that means great sex tonight! Thanx Scary mommy!
This is so funny!! I got rid of the annoying husband, now he is just an annoying ex pain in the ass.
Wow. I am not sure I have ever seen the “baby cycle” so succinctly and hilariously illustrated. I’m sure it’s been done already, but this is Pinterest material.
Thanks for the laughs!!
Sharon {Grumpy, Sleepy, and Bashful} recently posted..12 Signs That I Am Getting Old
I was lambasted by bible thumpers once too. Although I did step on a bit of a land mine (accidentally on purpose) I just didn’t know it was a holy land mine. Who knew some think GOD wants them to spank their children to keep them from burning in hell? Anyway, they’re rarely alone so keep your eye out! ;)
Andie @ multiplemama recently posted..resolutions schmesolutions
Truer words have never been illustrated so well. ;)
LOVE IT!!!!
Elaine recently posted..Y’all Are Gonna Laugh HARD at this Photo of Me & Miss Elaine-ous Monday!
I tried comming onto Christ……I guess he’s into virgins or something.. so I’m SOL . great post :-
oh.my.gosh.that.is.hilarious!
LOVE the demon baby image! Babies are so damn cute so you don’t kill them.
Pamela D Hart recently posted..Between Hell And Heaven
So funny yet so true!
This should come with a warning label for those of us that are in the pregnancy cycle. At 34 weeks laughing this hard at all the banter back and forth could cause labor. We won’t even discuss the whole I almost peed thing! You mommies know what I mean. I would so pay to have a coffee cup with this on it.
Who in the hell uses the word ‘flummoxed’ anyway? Your design is funny and true. I don’t care how you look at it. Grow a funny bone, chicago.
So my husband isn’t the only one who’s fucking annoying? Hahaha! Love how hilarious this is and the controversy it caused…at least in one person’s mind.
Ohhhh, that’s how I ended up with four. lmao.
LOVE this! And the comments were just as funny!
Lynn from For Love or Funny recently posted..The one thing we need to give, and receive, every day.
Awesome!
Your annoying, Why the fuck did I marry! Love it! So perfect. I need this on a mug!
If my body is my “heavenly temple” I want a fucking refund!!!!!
You and me both! The temple guardians need to be fired, too, they clearly have been slacking off.
Can I get an Amen up in here?
Not Supermom recently posted..65 Questions
I love it! The *only* thing I think it’s missing is a graphic of a bloated pregnant woman looking down at her husband and saying, “No, I do not want to suck on that icky thing.”
TheKitchenWitch recently posted..Year Of The Veg: Celery Soup
ummm linda whats wrong with carnality with my HUSBAND!!! from what I remember isnt a husband and wife supose to have sex. I get mad and frustrated with my husband and when we have an afternoon of “carnality” we get along a lot better. It helps us remember we are a couple not just parents. please try not to be so judgemental Its rude and mean. have you ever heard “you can attract more flys with honey than vinegar” so try bieng nicer if you want to teach others about god. And by the way any marriage counsler will tell you sex is a very important part of a marriage. Besides make up sex is GREAT. i love having sex with my husband
Ok, the post was funny. I laughed. Out loud. But the comments pushed me over the edge. I nearly peed my pants. Seriously. Sweet Linda is worried about your marriage. I just love that. *snort*
Amy ~ Eat. Live. Laugh. Shop. recently posted..Winter Detox Superfoods Salad
Hell YES! I want this on a mug!
Sunday Stilwell recently posted..Falling of the four letter word wagon
I think I see where the problem stems from…drinking needs to be more frequent. That, and condoms. ;)
NoDramaMama recently posted..Pottytraining Sucks!
Suddenly, I feel as though I can see my future. And it involves more flatulence than I expected.
Megan (Best of Fates) recently posted..And Then I Punched A Clown In The Face (My New Year’s Resolutions)
I want to laugh…and cry. Or maybe just cry. Love the graphic designs…
humanmama recently posted..2012 and the end of the world
I think scary mommy and her readers just got trolled. There is no way that was a serious comment. If it was then the troll needs some counseling, if you ask me.
Odd Dad recently posted..The trouble with lyrics
OMG, the post is awesome and the comments are too. I would LOVE an afternoon of carnality right about now. Come on into my temple, baybay! RAWR!
dysfunctional mom recently posted..Dont you worry your pretty little mind
This needs to be poster size! And wallet size! And coffee mug size!
And may I suggest marketing a line of onsies with the image of the devil baby? Please do so before n°2 grows out of onsies? Pleasepleaseplease?
Tinne from Tantrums and Tomatoes recently posted..Traditions where meant to be carried on, especially when they involve beans
Yep. That about sums it up.
Keinya recently posted..WhenYou Say Sorry Do You Mean It?
On the the eighth day Eve said ” get real”.
I love all of these thanks for sharing your humor it really makes several days more interesting despite the repetitiveness of everyday mommyhood.
Pam
OMG I can’t stop laughing. Seriously Linda…what church do you go to? I think me and hubby might go have sex in it.
Nicely done, dear.
Meredith Bland recently posted..“Kindergarten” means “children’s garden where they leave you and you are forced to re-evaluate your life” in German.
As always, funny and real!
Hatton recently posted..Dorothy Draper’s Greenbrier: my First {design} Love.
hahaha, so true.
Even after all that frustration and vomit, parenthood is still addicting. I have baby fever right now but as a single, broke, lesbian I’m thinking I’ll just have to ooh and awww at the babies I see.
Jessica, The Debt Princess recently posted..Where’s the Debt – January 2012
Soo funny. Soo true.
Shate98 recently posted..January 9, 2012 ~ Oh My Goodness, Daddy’s Guinness
Hilarious, take away the quickies and put in a few petri dishes and it’s me.
I don’t usually comment (sorry!), but this was hilarious!!! Did you create this or find it somewhere?
I spent way too much time creating it. :)
You know what I love so much about this infographic? It shows that we’re not alone in our thought patterns, which are unpredictable, irrational, and perfect.
Lucy recently posted..she’s almost 2
I love the infograph haha. Sharing it with other ‘scary mommies’ i know.
That chart is so spot on and funny at the same time. Really enjoyed this post :)
<3 it!
Megan recently posted..Invention or Re-Invention?
You put my life into stick-figure pictures! So creative!
Cassie recently posted..Getting Things Because I Lack Hair
This is so so awesome.
Good day! This post could not be written any better! Reading this post reminds me of my old room mate! He always kept talking about this. I will forward this write-up to him. Fairly certain he will have a good read. Thanks for sharing!
Ernestine recently posted..eating healthy
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