Are parenting experts actually… parents? Being one myself, I have a serious bone to pick with them: The “terrible twos” are crap. The hell on earth I want to stuff my child in a dresser drawer and take a three hour bath while consuming a bottle of wine “terrible threes” are more like it. Or, is it just me?
Lily hit a rough patch around 18 months that ended well before she turned two. Her second year was a pleasure. I remember boasting to my childless friends, who were too naive to clue me in on what was to come, that we must have skipped the terrible twos altogether. How lucky we were! And then she turned three. Hellooooo, devil child. She suddenly had an opinion about everything. She stopped cooperating for anything and began talking back. Her baby brother fell victim to her wrath, more than once bearing evidence in the form of teeth marks. Where had my little angel gone? It was awful. But it was over as quickly as it began and the following year was pretty much a breeze.
Ben seems to be continuing on the same track. Two was fabulous. Adorable, chocolate covered sweetness with just the occasional hint of difficulty. But like clockwork, at a few months over three, he has become a little argumentative pain in the ass. He has developed some serious selective listening. He suddenly has great interest in his attire. Stripes are stupid and brown looks like poop. He refuses to wear appropriate coats and even has begun giving me input on my clothing choices. He eats three foods willingly: Grilled cheese, macaroni and grapes. Anything else results in kicking and screaming for the both of us. Meltdowns are an everyday occurrence and he appears to thrive on pissing me off. Funny as he thinks he is, I’m less than amused. He can be pretty… terrible.
The good news is, if Lily was any indication, this phase will be short lived. The bad news? Evan isn’t far behind. God help me.
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The terrible twos are just a prelude for the “wonderful” things to come.
dysfunctional mom’s last blog post..WordFUL Wednesday ~ Cute Edition
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You are exactly right! I have no idea why they call it the terrible twos rather than the terrible threes. The person who created the expression clearly knew nothing about children. I personally think that four is the best age. Good luck with your current three and you next :) Miss you all!
Love,
Allison :)
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Oh and I meant your current three year old and then Evan. I realize it sounded like I was wishing you luck and a fourth child lol. Maybe one day :)
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Dottie has only been two for a few months and I can already feel three approaching, sending chills up my spine…. three year olds are lucky to survive to be four year olds… pure evil they are…
cristin’s last blog post..Saddest Words I Ever Heard
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Such a cute pic!
Miss E’s last blog post..Lusting After….
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I hate the threes. I despise them. I dread them. They are the worst year of childhood ever. I wish there was some sort of 3yr old camp that we could send our kids to and then have them sent back when they are 4.
Missy’s last blog post..I know, I know
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I’m going to half to disagree with you; three is my absolute favorite age! Maybe your kids are just delayed. KIDDING!!
Mrs4444’s last blog post..Can I Get a Third Opinion?
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I remember those days. I’m so glad they’re over!
Jenny´s last blog ..Dear Reader vol. #1
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Wow, thanks SO much for writing that.My little boy turned three ,2 months ago and tonight I reearching ‘anger in toddlers’ on Google.
I am literally blown away by the anger,outbursts,rudeness,name-calling,hitting,kicking,and general diasgreement.
He is being SO mean to me..I can barely take it.It is so nice to see that it’s not just us going through this..I am not alone.
It’s like my little boy has diaspeared and this very naughty three year old has arrived.He is literally breaking me down everyday.
I am proud that I am actually still here..and not fled to Mexico.
I find it so challenging.
But I know my sweet boy is there..somewhere and he’ll come back..soon!
ah.Thank God for Wine
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Ugh. Threes. We had a tough time through Two, but we made it. Still intact, worse for the wear, but we made it. Then Three hit. Holy Why Did Craigslist Ban Selling Kids, Batman! The first three years were hard, but this fourth, this Hell on Wheels, Get Me off This Ride, When Is the Safe Surrender at the Firehouse Offer Null bullsh*t is just wrong. Just wrong.
I can’t wait for Three to be over. But several parents have just admitted that Four is worse. Fabulous.
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Hi..I heard the 4s refereed to as the F*&%ing 4s.
My son is 3 and 4 months and have to say not to bad so far. We had a tough time shortly after his 2nd b-day and some terrible days during his 2s but, really nothing to want to shoot him over.
My other son is 2 and 2 months and like his older brother, the 2s are not bad at all.
I am really scared about the 4s. I think i have been spoiled so far and do not what to know what i have in store for me. LOL
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Completely agree!! Nobody told me how hard 3 would be. I am anxiously awaiting our little boys 4th birthday, surely year 4 will be better :)
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I whole heartedly agree. My number three is right in the middle of his terrible threes and it’s well, terrible.
Peaches´s last blog ..The Big Give.
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I am getting mixed emotions reading the comments. I have girl turning three in two months and an only boy going 4 and a half in a couple of months as well (the two other siblings are college a college freshie and a sophie).
I had recently quit a fifteen-year career (finally) so I may be able to watch the terrible twos(?), threes and even fours to unfold before our eyes. Sadistic, yeah but those are some of the episodes I will tell them about when they grow up, (i did not have much to say about the first two as they were darling angels) as much as the happy (cute) moments.
It’s not to say I don’t work as full-time referee, (and cheerer, cash register, cook and nanny) but it takes my anguish (and momentary fits of anger) away because I get lost in those moments when I try to take mental pictures, simply because my camera isn’t around most of time when I need to film my actors.
I lost most of the chance with my teenagers, I wouldn’t want to screw these last two chances … again
Twitter: judesurita
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i agree. three is kind of awful. :-(
MommyNamedApril´s last blog ..Cookies! Everything is Better with Cookies!
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I either have selective memory or had an extremely idealic bunch (5) of kids…including boy/girl twins ‘n a 15 month old girl next in line….essentially triplets…LOL….my older two boys were great also….honestly there were so few memorable issues…until…………………………………..
2006 I brought my youngest adult DD ‘n her 10 day old son into my life ‘n home….I essentially was coparenting him…about a year later she was able to strike out on her own successfully…..however, she works in the medical field with alternating shifts…many 12 hrs….I am alternate daycare…meaning all weekends, nights, etc….
Here is where there incredibly exasperating terrible threes come in! My Stars ‘n Garters! I am 60 years old….LOL ‘n there is not enough wine in the world to compensate….LOL…it is a constant battle of wills, mouthiness, meltdowns, etc….How did this loving little boy I refer to as Himself become this creature?! DD ‘n I were discussing his latest meltdown he had for me ‘n I said “Honey I simply do not remember any of you having these kind of reactions.” She has a steel trap memory for family trivia…LOL….’n she agreed, saying neither do I mom….
You are not alone young mothers…..we oldsters are experiencing it also :)
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