50 Things Moms Miss Most About Their Pre-Kid Lives

1. Sleep.

2. Money.

3. The never-had-a-baby body.

4. Having the freedom to make plans at the spur of the moment. Spontaneity.

5. Sleep.

6. Going to the bathroom alone.

7. Lack of mom guilt.

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8. Personal space that doesn’t involve people touching, tugging, and crawling all over you.

9. Holding linear, coherent, uninterrupted conversations with other adults.

10. Sleep.

11. Watching television that isn’t animated.

12. Hot coffee…a whole cup of it all in one glorious sitting.

13. Walking around the house naked.

14. Grocery shopping without hyperventilating at the check-out total.

15. Sleep.

16. Being able to have a few drinks without worrying about having to wake up at 5AM with a hangover and a toddler wanting breakfast.

17. Being able to clean, and have it remain tidy for more than an hour.

18. Date nights that don’t involve a curfew as the meter ticks on the babysitter.

19. Not urinating after every sneeze, cough, laugh, or moving the wrong way.

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20. Sleep.

21. Going more than 24 hours free from someone else’s bodily fluids. (i.e. being peed on, puked on, pooped on, snotted on, etc.)

22. Adult interaction.

23. Having awesome shoes. And having awesome places to go to while wearing them.

24. Enjoying a hot shower as long as the hot water holds out.

25. Sleep.

26. Leaving the house with a wallet and the car keys and nothing else.

27. Spontaneous sex.

28. Being able to savor a hot meal.

29. Having a telephone conversation that lasts more than a minute and a half uninterrupted.

30. Sleep.

31. Getting together with friends without having to pre-plan for a month beforehand.

32. Seeing the bottom of the laundry hamper.

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33. Actually resting on a sick day.

34. Books without pictures.

35. Sleep.

36. Walking though the house without shoes, and not having to worry about sharp object assassination attempts strewn all over the floor.

37. Making decisions without worrying if you’re scarring someone for life.

38. Silence.

39. Having an actual day OFF.

40. Sleep.

41. Having a nice meal in a restaurant that doesn’t feature a drive-through.

42. Having free time to do absolutely nothing.

43. Having a clean car, inside and out.

44. Having a job, or even a hobby, that is a reflection of ambitions and talent, instead of how well it fits into someone else’s schedule.

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45. Sleep.

46. Vacations that felt like actual vacations.

47. Staying up late for whatever reason, knowing that you can sleep in the next morning.

48. Having time, energy, and sanity.

49. Dates where conversation never centered around poop, money or schedules.

50. Sleep.

Related post: 25 Things Children Never Say

About the writer

The Scary Mommy Community is bound by humor, humility and an understanding that we can love our children to death... yet still need to vent about them.


Brenna 1 month ago

Oh, I would love to have a nice long shower, read to my hearts content and sleep for 8 hours……

Jshelto 2 months ago

Just a dramatic overstated list. only a few really feel like they apply.
19: yeah i could do without that but it doesn’t bother me that much.
7 and 8: being a parent is hard and full of guilt and you give up a lot of your personal space and time.
End of list.
I wish I could find more positive parenting articles that showed all the wonderful experiences we have as parents. So much whining these days.

Ferris 8 months ago

All of these, especially walking around naked

kelliekakers 8 months ago


Alexis L 1 year ago

This list makes me very nervous to have kids!! I like sleep!!!

Elizabeth Saucedo 1 year ago

Finally someone who understands what I’m going through !

Candace Ernst 1 year ago

having my own headspace for more than ten seconds before my kid notices she does not have my complete undivided attention… 😀 Reading anything is a luxury now. 😛

Sarah Locke 1 year ago

Def #3

Reality Chick 1 year ago

Thank sweet baby JESUS I’m child-free! How much can one reasonably be expected to sacrifice before calling themselves a slave? Do dads sacrifice this much of their personal freedom for their children? (Mine didn’t, and I know many other men do not). Genuinely curious here.

Amy Cowell Hildebrand 1 year ago

#17 & #48 for sure!!

Michelle Mittag Bollig 1 year ago

This is spot on! All people should read this before deciding to have children.

April_S 1 year ago

All these things! 7, 19, and 37! Aaah, yes. (and 36, except here it’s walking around barefoot without stepping on some type of spilled food). And 14, except it’s making it to the register without a toddler melt down after already spending 20 minutes in the store.

Heather Depetris McCaslin 1 year ago

Amen to this!!!

Azure Klein 1 year ago

Sleep is all i really miss… But i still have a newborn ( 8 weeks)

Sage Ryan 1 year ago

I don’t miss any of em.

Jesse Angielczyk 1 year ago

44 is the big one for me

Josie Taormino 1 year ago


Ivy McGraw Cooper 1 year ago

It’d be soooo nice to just hop out of the car and run in a store for one thing, the post office, the gas station, the wine store! Lol

Jessie Ladner 1 year ago

Holy crap, these are all so true, except they forgot to mention sleep lol 😉

Michele DiBenedetto La Capria 1 year ago

My son is two and I am enjoying every minute of it so many people make their kids out to be a hassle when there are women out there who would kill for the chance to be called mom

Kit Novak 1 year ago


Ali Forsyth 1 year ago

So miss 23 – all my lovely high shoes are in storage

Joanne Montgomery 1 year ago

Mother of a seventeen year old, two year old and one on the way…..although true, as they get older you get more sleep but more hassle, much less cuddles and much less money!! I agree with Karen!!!

Karen Surdel Major 1 year ago

As the mother of a 25 year old, I say you will get most of these things back when your kids are older. Don’t rush what you have now. I know these things are annoying, but they really do go fast and then you will be like me….wishing you kids were small again.

Nicole Spinos Motzny 1 year ago

Oh how I miss sleep

Nwanne Casey 1 year ago


Jenny luff 1 year ago

Exactly, as hubby takes 1st shift of bedtime duty……… Drinking tea quick ready to take over. Xxx oh the days of conversation. Xxxx

Sarah Meehan 1 year ago

Story of our lives!

Robin Munson Beals 1 year ago

Doing whatever I want to/need to AT EXACTLY THE MOMENT I WANT TO.

Suzette 1 year ago

Oh, how I miss #23, the shoe thing. And the pre-baby body that knows how to walk in them. And places to wear them on a regular basis. And the sleep to recover from wearing them. I have a much-beloved and super active 6 year old so anything I can’t run in is a non-option.

Shawn Ebel-Odeen 1 year ago

I only suffer from maybe 1/2 of those. Yay!

Christine Adamson 1 year ago

All of the above!! I know there will be a time that I will wish it all back but, right now, in it, I’d kill to have no one physically connected to me or needing me for 24 hours!!

Nicole Lynn 1 year ago

My skinny pre-kid body I miss the most!!!!!!!! Doesn’t matter how much I exercise or eat right it will never be the same!

Doris Valladao 1 year ago

In training for the teen years. Waiting for them to come home so you can go to sleep

Kathy May 1 year ago

and 31 😉

Tina Alderman 1 year ago

Number 29 is so us! lol

Leighanna Miller 1 year ago

26 and 31

Patty Hathcock Biafora 1 year ago

They’re only little for a little while. Reminds me of Race Adkins’ song You’re Gonna Miss This. I always drink hot coffee cause I have a thermos cup that keeps it hot for hours

Stephanie Kathryn 1 year ago

Wow so accurate!

Lori Finley 1 year ago

I wouldn’t trade mommy life, but I will admit there are some things I miss.

Lydia Enriquez Quijano 1 year ago


Stephanie Stephen 1 year ago

#4, 8 & 29! And of course sleep lol

Ginger Brunner 1 year ago

One more for the list… Pre-baby memory! Baby-brain doesn’t seem to go away!

Claire Russell 1 year ago

Only 50?!?!?

Roshelle 1 year ago

I don’t get it… Why have kids to begin with? This shit sounds miserable!

Marilyn Terriquez 1 year ago

Honestly, since losing my never-had-a-baby-body nothing else really matters. I hate to sound vain but i have no interest in leaving the house looking like i do now :-( and my baby is awesome, he sleeps well and hardly ever cries so l have absolutely no other complaints lol

Kirsten Johnston 1 year ago

#23 I don’t even know where my awesome shoes are :/

Amanda Carson Mettler 1 year ago

Laughing as I drink my lukewarm coffee that’s been reheated 3 times already.

Marnie 1 year ago

I still do #13. My poor, traumatized kids. lol! #14 is oh so true!

Amy Parr Olsen 1 year ago

Dead on.

Naomi Brice 1 year ago


genie 1 year ago

for us I would say being able to watch what we want , when we want- even if its rated R!
also having things stay where you put them!!

Meena Adams 1 year ago

#1-50: my non-gross body/adequate sleep-getting face.

Krista Hunter Hill 1 year ago


Nichole Tennyson Younis 1 year ago

So. True.

Delinke Bejczy 1 year ago

nr 7 ohhhhhhhhhhh yesssssssssssssss

Jennifer Hansen McCue 1 year ago

Wouldn’t trade it for anything but #7, #16, #19, #44

Moochie Molloy 1 year ago

Love the sleep one hahaha

Stephanie De Bear 1 year ago

The only thing I truly miss is sleeping in on the weekends and taking naps whenever I felt like it.

Frances Justice 1 year ago

Ah but the time goes so fast….not while you’re in the thick of it, but man the last twenty five years flew!! Back to the prekid mode except for #19, but hey they have surgeries to fix that LOL

Laura Goebel Tumpane 1 year ago

I must have written this in my middle of the night not really sleeping delirium

Harold Ortiz 1 year ago

Hold on there sisters! If you think that most of these do not apply to active Papi’s (dads) You are seriously mistaken…lol

Hsiuwen Jao-Torres 1 year ago

Sleep is definitely my #1, but I think the most difficult is when you have kids to care for while being sick as a dog yourself…

Amber Boutros 1 year ago

I miss wearing pretty clothes and jewelry.

Kellie R Bryant 1 year ago

I miss ALL of that!!!

Roxanne Voit 1 year ago

My baby is almost 20. I miss the noise. Never thought I’d say that. Now I have gotten my self 2 young dogs to increase the activity and noise level around here. Lol

Katie Cote 1 year ago

Love this

Danielle Kingston Fry 1 year ago

I’m weeping. Grieving for my past life. Holy crap, I miss it.

Angie Donadio-Hunt 1 year ago

Personal space- there is a 4 year old rolling around on my legs and head butting me while I’m reading this – regardless of how many times I say ouch or please stop!

Rachel Renee Womack 1 year ago

All of the above.. Well lost of the above, some didn’t apply

Marina Cumming 1 year ago

No. 12…as I start to drink my cold cup of coffee…I add ice cubes and a little shot of Bailey’s and enjoy my iced coffee! Love being a mom…most of the time!

Sara 1 year ago

This makes me so depressed

Diane Luzio Minaker 1 year ago

Love how many times sleep comes up…sorry I was too tired to actually count! 😛

    Kristin Rothe Johnson 1 year ago

    Agreed! And it’s every 5 points, I believe… 😉

Ana 1 year ago

Well, I’ve never had #3… cause I ruined it by being fat on and off since puberty… so that’s out the window, I wont blame my kids for ruining my “perfect figure”
And #17… never happens, I have a big dog and love him to bits, and will never go withput a dog again. And ever since he was a puppy I realized that my house will never be clean again. EVER. Lol

Rhiannon-Kurtis Samuell 1 year ago

I’ve gotten those things back over time, but my kids are 13 and 6. Long past the toddler years.

Ashli Hanson-La Magdelaine 1 year ago


B 1 year ago

For men I think there’s just one thing. Not having to listen to non-stop bitching about how it’s so hard to be a mommy! Sorry, but I don’t get it. I could go on, but I’m sure no ones still reading after that comment.

Holly Froelich Weidenhamer 1 year ago

Oh so true!

Kali Lyles Morgan 1 year ago

All true, but I was also very, very sad because I wanted a baby more than anything.

Chimpo 1 year ago

LOL. Parents really lament their poor life choices don’t they? Most nights I get too much sleep, I have adult conversations with other adults and the animated TV shows I watch are adult shows such as South Park. I have a meaningful job which leverages my experience and education which allows me to take overseas holidays every 6 months with my wife. We don’t and will not have a loaf which will kill our life goals. Sorry parents, having a sprog is a choice and you picked poorly. When you see an airplane flying above you, please give it a wave and imagine my smiling face waving back at you as it jets to an exotic part of the world… the most exotic part of the world your likely to see is the city park (should you be able to afford the fuel and/or the time to visit it). Have a nice life with your hopes and dreams anchor you call son or daughter. LOLLLLLLLL!!!

    Sara 1 year ago


Helen Russo 1 year ago

sigh…pretty much. If I’m gonna want candy at 10 pm, I have to “plan”
for it at 2. No more late night runs to the grocery store!

Rebecca Carey Dyer 1 year ago

It’s satire, get a sense of humor.

Allison Diehl 1 year ago

51. Being able to vent without some moron telling you that if you don’t like it, you shouldn’t have become a parent (or how ungrateful you are, or some other backhanded insult that makes the speaker feel superior).

    Kim Trefz 1 year ago

    High five, sister.

    Ivy McGraw Cooper 1 year ago

    Right!? Like you have ANY idea the extent of being a parent is before!!!

Annette Finkeldei 1 year ago

16, 21, 37

Maria Deanna Luisa Miller 1 year ago

Yes yes yes! …Love my kids would not change anything!

Barbara Fenton 1 year ago

Yes and he is only 1…

Julie Ann Glutz 1 year ago

Number 44

Vanessa Alvarellos 1 year ago

Funny! But what’s the big deal about sleep? Mine are 3, 6 and 9, I put them to bed by 830 and we all get plenty of sleep!! It’s pretty much always been like that (after the baby stage of course).

Naomi N Albert 1 year ago

I never have to worry about locking myself in the bathroom or my bedroom because my 7 & 4 year old both know how to unlock doors with a screwdriver or toy if need be. Is this something they learned on Disney?

Audrey Flud 1 year ago

I miss when flashing my boobs in public was MY decision.

Alicia Cosman Throop 1 year ago

All true! Lol

Mercedes Lehman Untalan 1 year ago

i miss doing nothing lol and for me its drinking my iced coffee BEFORE ot gets watered down!! lol

Nicole Clark 1 year ago

Amen!!! I sure miss hot meals! And sleep!

Julie Ellis 1 year ago

So true!

Nessa Grace 1 year ago

I miss staying at work late and not worrying about picking him up from school.

Rachel Wenger Lehman 1 year ago

I had kids before texting so it was impossible to have any kind of real phone conversation without a crisis happening… Now, the grands wanna get in on it too…


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