This is Motherhood – Scary Mommy

This is Motherhood

I’ve traded my house that was once quiet and in order for complete chaos and disorganization.

I’ve traded my nights of sleep for days of exhaustion.

I’ve traded my once voluptuous chest for, well, business… almost a decade of working boobs.

I’ve traded late nights out at the bar for late nights pacing the hall.

I’ve traded my lightweight and trendy purse for a diaper bag so big it barely fits in my vehicle.

I’ve traded a tight, muscular body in for one where everything has moved, shifted and appeared in places it never was.


I’ve traded being on time for giving fashionably late a whole new meaning.

I’ve traded a normal workout some days for simply loading and unloading, buckling and unbuckling, and going in and out of the house with four kids. It gives Shaun T a run for his money as this is my definition of INSANITY.

I’ve traded falling asleep to my favorite Bravo reality shows for passing out during Dora, Mickey Mouse, Sophia or Peppa the Pig… the episode I’ve watched for the 12th time.

I’ve traded my stylish and tasteful wardrobe for wearing the same outfit for days in a row with my finest from the clearance rack.

I’ve traded the bed I once shared with just my husband for one sometimes filled with the entire family.

I’ve traded my heels for some flats… Who am I kidding? I’m barefoot most days.

I’ve traded long, luxurious showers for a two-minute rinse-off with little people either trying to bust down the door down or stick their fingers from beneath its entry.

I’ve traded my sanity for… well, a whole lotta crazy.

I’ve traded long hair that was always straightened, curled or styled for a greasy bun thrown on top of my head.

I’ve traded a clean, crumb-free kitchen for a feeding barn that never seems to close or appear to be sanitary.


I’ve traded a flat stomach for a soft spot that my babies like to rest their heads upon.

I’ve traded frequent date nights out with my husband for watching a show played back on the DVR before one of us is being summoned and passed out on the floor in a baby’s room.

So basically, I’ve traded easy for hard, well-rested for draining and carefree for anxious.

So thisthis is motherhood?

As crazy as it may be to believe, I think I’ll take it.

To be honest, this zoo, this complete chaotic circus with its never-ending pleas was, quite frankly, the easiest trade-off of my life.

Related post: The Holy Grail of Motherhood