In the wake of so many celebrity deaths, Twitter vows to protect Betty White
There’s a saying you may have heard when a celebrity or two passes: “It always comes in threes.” This is ominous, but somewhat comforting because it implies that there is eventually an end to our heartbreak and panic.
Well, 2016 has no fucks to give. It has not heard this saying — or just doesn’t care, because it’s the year from hell.
We lost Prince, David Bowie, Gene Wilder, Phife Dawg, Florence Henderson, Leonard Cohen, Alan Rickman… then George Michael. Then Carrie Fisher?! The internet wants to bubble wrap Betty White. And we don’t blame them.
Don’t touch Betty White, don’t look at Betty White, don’t even breathe on her wrong
— 🎄M🎅 (@MuirbucksCoffee) December 27, 2016
Y’all, we gotta find Betty White and put her in a secure storage facility with 24/7 maximum protection security. 2016 will NOT take her too. pic.twitter.com/h45tHsL44d
— Jordan (@jordansdiamonds) December 27, 2016
Someone even went as far as to set up a crowdfunding page to keep her safe.
We’ve had the rug pulled out from under us too many times this year. We’re kind of losing our minds.
If you take Betty White from us this year, we will riot.
The Human Population
— Cloyd Rivers (@CloydRivers) December 27, 2016
There are four days left of 2016. Someone get Betty White into a bunker IMMEDIATELY.
— Stacy OliverSikorski (@StacyLOliver) December 27, 2016
@BettyMWhite you sit still, do nothing dangerous. I mean it.
— lilly601 (@Jamatha77) December 27, 2016
Betty White on 1/1/17 pic.twitter.com/cCGvmKlwwm
— Tristan (@AyoTristan) December 27, 2016
Yeah, we know. We all die eventually, circle of life, blah, blah, blah. Keep your hands of Betty White, 2016.