Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy
What started as an innocent on-line baby book to chronicle Jill's stay-at-home days with her children, (Lily, Ben, and Evan) quickly transformed into a vibrant community of parents, brought together by a common theme: Parenting doesn’t have to be perfect. Learn more here.
@scarymommy
NYT bestselling author of Confessions of a Scary Mommy and Motherhood Comes Naturally (And Other Vicious Lies). Fond of curse words, sarcasm and Diet Coke.
At the Gaithersburg Book Fest with Amber Dusick of Parenting With Crappy Pictures! http://t.co/7qKoX7B5cm - 35 mins ago
Latest posts by Jill Smokler, AKA Scary Mommy (see all)
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We spent ten minutes in hysterics over Lily’s homework assignment tonight…
They had me at Uranus, but the gas? And the large object knocking Uranus over? And, Lily showing me her Uranus’ movement? Is it just us, or have the teachers been sniffing a few too many glue sticks?
{ 67 comments… read them below or add one }
That’s great. Oh the things that I’ll get to enjoy when my son starts school. LOL.
.-= Matt´s last blog ..Mother’s Day and May =-.
Holy hell on a high stick, this is too freaking much. I would have doubled over, too. Here’s my question, did Lily ask why you were laughing? Did you have to explain yourselves?
.-= Sarah´s last blog ..Courage is =-.
Clearly the teacher who wrote this assignment is stoned, not you, and I think that a Thank you note from you is in order, because this is flipping priceless… I just asked my science geek if something knocked over Uranus and he got all logical. damn wasted wit.
As a former teacher, I can only assume that the teacher MUST have sent this home for all parents to have a chuckle. That is HYSTERICAL!!!
.-= Rachel´s last blog ..Mother’s Day Re-Cap =-.
Strangely, I do not remember this from school. But when the information is presented this way, it’s bound to stick with this generation :)
.-= This Belle Rocks´s last blog ..I don’t know what to say =-.
haha, seriously, what were they thinking?
I am laughing my ass off right now…this is seriously why I WOULD give an assignment like this. See? Not all homework is boring!
.-= Rebecca´s last blog ..My Own Personal Mute Buttons =-.
Are not supposed to sniff the glue sticks? Not that I’m a teacher, but if should I be? If I sniff glue?
I’m seriously questioning my life right now. HEY? Where’d my glue stick go?
.-= Julie´s last blog ..Conscious? Unwillingly So. =-.
OMG. Outside my daughter’s classroom in the hallway this week are the pictures of the kids’ planets. My daughter chose Uranus. So she had listed on there some facts about Uranus.
1. Uranus is more than 14 times larger than the earth.
2. Uranus has an odd magnetic field
etc etc Pretty sure I was the only immature parent who stood in the hallway and chuckled. I still can’t wait until she brings it home this week so I can take a picture of it and put it on my blog. LOL
I guess I’m an unfit parent too because I can’t wait till my daughter brings home that picture and I can tell her “WOW! You sure do know a lot about Uranus!”
-C
2 weeks ago that class was on a field trip to our observatory. They don’t pronounce the word Uranus (your anus) like the rest of the world. So the guide kept saying it weird and one of the other moms, a friend of mine, said to me really loud “what planet is he talking about? That’s not a planet! Is that how you say that???”. I pulled her aside and told her “do you really think the guide is going to tell a class of 3rd graders “look for your anus up in the sky this week” ??”
I’m assuming they pronounce it their weird way to keep the kids from getting all goofy.
LMAO!! Teaching kids, sure, they may be sniffing one too many glue sticks. I wouldn’t blame them one bit.
.-= AmazingGreis´s last blog ..Bucket list… =-.
Awesome,
too good to be accidental. Some teacher has way too much time on their hands!
.-= Chris´s last blog ..Cloth Diapers – Two weeks in =-.
Sniffing glue sticks or methane gas… I giggle like an adolescent every time I hear someone say ‘duty.’ Totally embarrasses my teen, which means extra points for me.
I can’t stop laughing. I think I am going to be in real trouble some day seeing as how I am my son’s teacher. Now I have a Bloodhound Gang song stuck in my mind because of the Uranus reference.
I think you guys are normal though. My husband and I still make Beavis and Butthead references. My daughter put her shirt over her head Cornholio style, and I took a pic and sent it to everyone. Thanks for the laugh:)
.-= Lesa Rumbalski´s last blog ..Mother’s Day Ramble =-.
–>I once asked a teacher something about “what if Uranus is bigger than Jupiter” in high school. It didn’t help that he was a very overweight teacher and kind of a jerk. The entire class lost it including me at my slip.
Loved this post!
~deb
.-= WebSavvyMom´s last blog ..The little known other stage of grieving: Distraction =-.
At the princes school today they had posters outside the classroom, each kid did a poster on what they would do if they were “flat Stanley” ( apparently a flat kid) one child “bless his heart” wrote he would float under the teachers desk and look around. The hung it up in the hallway… Can’t blame the kid right? Hate the game not the player.
This is hilarious!
.-= Pres. Kathy´s last blog ..Spring Giveaway! =-.
Uranus. Oh boy that is too much.
.-= DC Urban Dad´s last blog ..What did you learn this weekend? =-.
We sing “the Planet Song” from Blue’s Clues, and the description for Uranus is “Uranus spins on its side” but I have always added “tee hee” after that because I’m just that immature LOL. This would have had me in absolute stitches.
What? I don’t get it.
:deadpans:
.-= Robin´s last blog ..Monday’s Muse: Betty Blue =-.
Whoever wrote that was having one hell of a good time! Did Lily get the humor?
.-= Carabee´s last blog ..Table Topics Tuesday: Dream Vacation =-.
Hilarious. The Teach probably has a sense of humor.
.-= Seattledad (Luke, I am Your Father)´s last blog ..Balancing Acts =-.
Hahaha! I can finally go to sleep now with a smile on my face. Dreaming about big, gassy Uranuses getting knocked over by big objects and rolling around on their sides.
That is too good.
.-= Lolli´s last blog ..Picture Me In Branson =-.
ain’t gonna lie. i’m just a substitute teacher but i gotta tell ya – if it weren’t for the glue sticks, none of us would make it through the day…
.-= cathyjoy´s last blog ..the Happiness Project =-.
LM”A”O.
.-= subWOW´s last blog ..Mother’s Day Double Feature: Why I don’t deserve a holiday in my name =-.
I just sprayed coffee all over my screen. You have certainly made my day!
OMG-my belly hurts now from laughing so hard.
.-= Susie @newdaynewlesson´s last blog ..The Kindness Club: Week 5 Prompt =-.
If I were a teacher, I would totally be into having fun, too. That many kids to deal with, and we’re lucky it’s just this and not pot breaks in the teacher’s lounge. I love it!
.-= Bethany´s last blog ..Oooo…It’s a good one! =-.
So does Uranus drop it like its hot, or is it more of a shake it like a polariod picture?
And I started giggling at “Uranus” as did my child. The perfect mimic.
Ahh, I see many parent-teacher conferences in my future.
.-= Domesticated Gal´s last blog ..A Momentary Lapse of Sanity =-.
Oh, you can bet the teachers were snickering in the staffroom all afternoon over that one!
.-= Nan´s last blog ..Grownup Book Review =-.
This is classic! Uranus is, hands down, the funniest thing. Uh, that doesn’t sound right.
.-= Lynn from For Love or Funny´s last blog ..What to do if your dog won’t defend you =-.
That’s hilarious. Do you think the teachers might have been a little tongue in cheek?
I bought my grandson a sticker book with planets fo easter.When he asked me “Grannie what planet is that?
Uranus I told him! and everyone had tears rolling down their cheeks as it was so funny!Is this a way for a grandmother to act!
How do teachers manage!
rally_thade17@hotmail.com
I’d still be laughing… and laughing.. and laughing…
My kids would be sitting there watching me roll on the floor wondering why they have an insane parent.
M
.-= Mishelle´s last blog ..Monday after Mother’s Day =-.
Clearly, teachers have a wonderful sense of humor.
.-= patois´s last blog ..11 Years Old and Already Kissing =-.
Oh my god I think I would fall over laughing if I saw that come out of my sons backpack… Guess I’m a bad mommy too.
Dude. My kid’s totally into space stuff. I can’t EVER say Uranus without laughing.
.-= Karen at French Skinny´s last blog ..Day 34 from France: I Am Not A Morning Person =-.
My kid just did a project on Uranus. Said he picked that planet because it has the coolest sounding name.
My job is done here . . .
.-= tysdaddy´s last blog ..Of Buses and Banality =-.
I love it, but not sure which part makes you bad parents. Just parents with a sense of humor. You should write a smart ass and witty comment on her homework and see if the teacher can laugh at a Uranus movement.
.-= NotJustAnotherJen´s last blog ..water babies =-.
That is awesome. I still giggle when I see a Captain D resataurant or every time a UPS commercial saus What Can Brown Do for You so this rocks. Any kind of potty humour really flies around here – especially since we had babies.
Is she too young to tell why it is so funny? Probably but it would still be nteresting if she got it!
.-= Brittany at Mommy Words´s last blog ..One Mother’s Courageous Choice =-.
Everyone love Uranus :)
.-= Momma Drama´s last blog ..My Baby’s Growing Up =-.
LOL!! We have 12 year old sense of humors here too.
.-= Angie´s last blog ..All about ME! =-.
I think its great you two have such a good sense of humor. Kids need that when it comes to hard or stressful school work.
I thought it was freakin funny!
.-= soccermom´s last blog ..The 10 Year Trip =-.
Add me to the list of unfit parents then. My daughter was using stamps yesterday and had used an I and two very interestingly placed o’s on either side of the I. I laughed like a little school girl.
.-= Krystyn´s last blog ..Attitude? What attitude? =-.
I remember hearing once they were going to change the name to “Urinus” but that’s not that much better. haha
.-= Sam_I_Am´s last blog ..What I know at 26 =-.
I think this is all deliberately foisted on parents by bored teachers and administrators. Very funny!
I seriously don’t think I could have kept a straight face.
.-= TheKitchenWitch´s last blog ..Veg-Head Monday: Zucchini Stuffed Tomatoes =-.
hahahahah…I would have been on the floor laughing.
Uranus Movement– now that’s a new one. Kind of reminds me of a joke:
How are the Star ship Enterprise and Toilet Paper the same thing…
Both Circle Uranus, and both wipe out Klingons.
.-= Christopher (AKA: CaJoh)´s last blog ..Compassionate Comforting vs. Arm-chair Advice =-.
ROFL! We would have done the same things. Our kids would probably have ran home waving that paper in the air!
.-= Angelia´s last blog ..Teaser Tuesday =-.
Cue Beavis & Butthead laughter. hehe. you said uranus. hehe.
That planet will NEVER stop being funny.
oh my gosh….this stuff that they teach nowadays, is way more funnier than 35 years ago…oops, just dated myself…..
How do they teach that with a straight face?
.-= Sara — The Football Wife´s last blog ..Did I Really Just Say That? =-.
Oh potty humor NEVER gets old!
.-= Adventuroo´s last blog ..What’s Your Outdoor Tradition? =-.
Ha! And wait for the call from the teacher after Lilly announces how her parents were rolling on the floor laughing about Uranus’ gas!
.-= Suzicate´s last blog ..Freaks, Geeks, And Squeaks =-.
That was so funny that I read it to my husband and had him laughing too! This is my first time at your blog, but not my last! Thanks for the laugh – I needed it!
.-= Natalie´s last blog ..How Does Your Garden Grow? =-.
Awesome!! I’m laughing my own Uranus off!!
.-= Liz @ Peace, Love & Guacamole´s last blog ..Speak Up =-.
no you guys are definitely cool parents fo sure. wish i had fun parents as a kid, trust me
.-= vanillasugar´s last blog ..strawberry shortcake w/ chocolate =-.
I’m actually working on putting a space program together for some kids this summer. With reading material like this it could be really fun!
That is out of control!! Too funny- what were the teachers thinking?!?
I found you through Mom Loop Friday Follow! I couldnt figure out how to friend you- so I subscribed! Hope you’ll come check out my blog too! Nice to meet you- love your blog!
Shannon
.-= Shannon´s last blog ..How to make your own Watercolor Paints =-.
hey! i got my first blogger award today!!! (i know right – you are so fuckin impressed!) and i’m passin’ it on to you cuz apparently i like totally love you! come by and pick me (oops) it up!
.-= cathyjoy´s last blog ..the Happiness Project =-.
Yep, Lily showing you her Uranus’ movement pretty much sent me over.
When my daughter started her first porn-ed classes we tormented her relentlessly.
We begged her to replace the word erection with boner, hard-on, jizz stick etc… in her homework assignments but she just roller her eyes in disgust. “you two are so immature”.
.-= Jennifer June´s last blog ..Music =-.
Awesome. Funny is just funny, to pretend otherwise is lying.
.-= Your Mommy Friend Lori´s last blog ..Two Words of (unsolicited) Advice =-.
Methane gas? On Uranus. Priceless. There’s no way the teacher wrote this with a straight face.
-DD
.-= Distracted Daddy´s last blog ..Bottle and a movie. =-.
I hear there’s a serious “Klingon” problem on Uranus..
*giggle*giggle*snort*snort…
…sorry. YES immature. Had to do it. The opportunity was too good to pass up :)
.-= Franticmommy´s last blog ..YOU KNOW YOU’RE A COMMITTED BLOGGER WHEN =-.
oh. my. lawd!
because ‘lord’ just wouldn’t do it. teachers are totally smoking something. must have been hanging out with the guys from yo gabba gabba.
.-= Tiffany´s last blog ..I have nothing against foreigners, but if I did, it would probably sound something like this =-.
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