Real Estate Listing For ‘Perfect Starter Home’ Is Pure Comedy – Scary Mommy

Real Estate Listing For ‘Perfect Starter Home’ Is Pure Comedy

Zillow ad for ‘perfect starter home’ is hilarious

Why use a boring real estate agent who will gouge you for their cut when you can sell your house yourself, and also be hilarious? This listing for an Alabama home is pure comedy. If I were in the market for an Alabama home, I would be knocking on this door.

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“Put a bowl of lemons on top of a book.” Guilty. We’ve all tried to make our place look more House Beautiful. Don’t lie.

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“Beat the birds to pick blueberries from the bush, or pick rosemary. Find a creative recipe that uses blueberries and rosemary. The point is that they are there and have somehow survived.”

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“Tell your mom the home has a basement “in case of storms” and she will almost certainly nod in approval.”

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If this guy isn’t a professional real estate agent, he’s missed his calling. He’s basically summed up the amenities of ever city-turned-hipster-mecca in the entire country.

Well done, sir.